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Influence of Demons by gabrielleabelle
 
The Least Worst Option
 
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Sixteen days since she'd had a hit. Sixteen long, tortuous days.

If she'd known she'd have to go sixteen days without any coke, Buffy would have prepared herself better. Done a huge coke binge before being taken off the stuff. Let her addiction go out with a bang.

Now, though, it felt like she had just prematurely ended her relationship with coke, and she was desperately craving some closure. One last good-bye.

Too bad Spike wouldn't let her.

He'd been easier to deal with the past few days, though. Ever since that cave-in. Buffy had this surreal feeling that they'd reached some sort of understanding. What that understanding was, she wasn't quite sure. But there was a cease-fire of sorts on the hostility between them.

What was bothering her even more was his sudden protectiveness towards her. Again, starting with that cave-in, when he'd shielded her body from the falling rocks in an uncharacteristically concerned gesture. Since then, he'd often offered his hand to help her climb if need-be, and had gone out of his way to threaten demons who looked at her as they might their next meal.

It was disconcerting to say the least. It was almost as if he cared. Which was a ridiculous notion in her mind. A souled vampire caring for a whore. No, she was fairly certain he was just protecting his way home. That was what he wanted her for, after all.

In addition to the protectiveness, he'd also been increasingly distracted. At times, she could have sworn that he was sensing someone following them, but he never shared his thoughts with her. Hell, he never shared anything with her. When Buffy asked what he was listening for, he just shook his head and continued walking.

Fortunately for him, they were one step closer to getting home than they had been before. After days of trekking through the underground tunnels, they'd finally reached the mountainside town of Cathela where the sorcerer, Wyver, lived.

His residence was outside of town on a road that scaled the side of the mountain. The road evened out to a wide ledge with a simple, yet large, stone house on it.

It was just past midnight as they approached, and Buffy found herself hoping that Wyver was a nocturnal demon. She didn't want to piss him off by waking him up. It's not good to piss off a sorcerer.

When Spike knocked on the door, however, a short Latina woman answered almost immediately. There were black bags under her eyes, and stray wisps of hair escaped from her messy ponytail. She didn't look at all surprised to see them.

Spike spoke. "We're looking for - "

"Wyver," the woman interrupted. "Yes, of course you are. I'm his assistant. Come in."

She stood aside, letting Spike and Buffy enter the house. The front room had all the appearance of a doctor's waiting room. Overstuffed armchairs in warm, red hues dotted the room, accompanied by towering fake ferns. An oblong coffee table housed an array of magic books instead of the out-of-date magazines one might expect in a doctor's office. A dining area lay to the side with a small table and chairs. Across the entrance was a door marked "Lab", and a small hallway led into darkness at the far end of the lounge.

Buffy joined Spike's side in the middle of the room, waiting for the woman to get Wyver. She didn't leave the room, though.

"I'm sorry," she said. "But I'm afraid Wyver is very ill and cannot see anyone right now. I'm Avery, and I'd be happy to help you with anything you need."

Spike sucked in his cheeks in irritation. "Sorry, luv, but we're not needing a slave here - "

Avery's eyes flashed. "I'm not a slave! I told you. I'm his assistant. He's taught me everything he knows." She paused. "We're partners."

Spike looked skeptical. "Partners, right. Well, partner, we need you to translate some text for us and then do something about a sealing spell that's been put on the girl." He waved a hand at Buffy.

"'The girl' has a name," Buffy said. "I'm Buffy. This is Spike."

Avery nodded as Buffy made the introductions. Much as she tried, Buffy couldn't brush aside the feeling that Avery had been expecting them.

"What's the text?" Avery asked.

Without a word, Spike unzipped the duffel and dug out the book, displaying the cover to Avery.

"Book of Langlar," Spike said.

"Interested in portals?" Avery asked. She took the book without waiting for an answer, opening it up to glance at the pages. "I can work on this later." She set the book down. "I'd actually like to take a look at you, Buffy. What type of sealing spell is this?"

Buffy shrugged while rubbing at her nose. "The type that seals stuff?"

"She has powers," Spike said. "Bunch of demons sealed 'em up. We need them back."

"I see." Avery focused her attention on Buffy. "Spike, why don't you stay out here while I take Buffy back to the lab? See what I can find out about this sealing spell."

Spike stepped forward. "None too fond of being separated like that, actually. Funny, I don't smell your master at all."

Avery rolled her eyes at Spike. "He's a wizard. He has a cloaking spell on himself specifically to keep demons like you from snooping on him."

Spike snorted. "Still doesn't seem right - "

"We'll be fine," Buffy said. When Spike looked at her in surprise, she turned away to avoid his gaze. "She's gonna help, after all, right?" The last thing she needed was protection from another slave. That is, from a slave. Buffy wasn't a slave anymore. She had to keep reminding herself of that sometimes.

Leaving Spike in the lounge, Buffy followed Avery through the locked door to the lab. The lab was several times larger than any of Buffy's chemistry labs in school. Test tubes, flasks, stirrers and more were arranged in a mad scientist set-up in the middle of the room. A rainbow of different-colored potions dripped through the tubes.

Along the walls were shelves upon shelves of more equipment and supplies. Labeled jars contained a variety of oddities, some of which Buffy recognized from the Magic Box. Some of the contents, though, were a complete mystery to her. One seemingly empty jar merely read "Space" on the label.

In addition to the magical paraphernalia, the shelves also housed standard herbs. Buffy wandered freely, browsing through the selection. Sage, borage, bergamot, cannabis. Buffy paused. Cannabis?

"You have drugs?" She turned to Avery who was sorting through some books at the other end of the room.

Avery barely looked up. "Huh? Oh, yes. Wyver has just about everything you might want here."

Buffy bit her lip. Everything? "Do you have cocaine?"

Okay, so there was no way to ask that casually. The question landed like a lead weight in the middle of the room. Avery stopped entirely and looked up at her.

After an awkward pause, Buffy shook her head. "Never mind. Just...just a thought." She wrapped her arms around her torso, berating herself for her slip. She thought she was past this.

There was a soft thump as Avery set down a stack of books on a small, wooden table near Buffy. Avery sat in one of the chairs, gesturing for Buffy to take the other one.

"You got hooked on the stuff?" Avery asked as Buffy sat down.

Buffy nodded, looking down at the table.

"I think Wyver has his own stash somewhere. Not sure where. It's not really used much for magical purposes."

A stash somewhere...Buffy looked at the other woman who was browsing through the pages of a large tome. Perhaps it would be worth it to take a look for that stash sometime. After all, one small hit couldn't hurt her. And she deserved something for going so long without any.

"So, this partner thing...how'd that happen?" Buffy said, searching for conversation. It'd been so long since she'd talked to another human.

Avery looked up and smiled. "I had a few other owners before. A couple vamps." She tilted her head to the side, showing her scarred neck to Buffy. "The day Wyver bought me was one of the best days of my life. He said he wanted an assistant, not a slave." She looked back down at the book. "He's kind to me."

"I've been lucky, too," Buffy said. "I mean, yeah, at first I had some really nasty owners. But then Trevil bought me and he was so nice. Gave me anything I wanted."

Avery laughed. "See, there's some good ones out there." An awkward silence fell between the two of them as Avery flipped through the pages. "And the vampire you're with now? Spike?"

"He doesn't own me," Buffy blurted out. "We're partners."

"So you're free to leave him?"

"What?"

Avery bit her lip. "He'd let you do that? Walk away? Be on your own?"

Buffy shook her head. She'd dealt with this. She and Spike. They'd reached an understanding. They were partners, working to go home. "I don't want to leave him."

"You're not from here, are you, Buffy?" Avery asked. "The book you two are needing...it's about portals. You're from another world, right?"

This wasn't a secret, was it? Buffy wasn't sure. Spike was playing his cards close to his chest. She didn't know if this was information she could give out or not. What was the harm, though? Avery and Wyver were supposed to help them get home anyway.

Buffy nodded.

Avery trailed her finger along a groove in the wooden table. A nervous gesture. "Do you want to go home?"

Buffy laughed. "Well, yeah. Of course. I mean, it's home, right?"

Home with her family and friends. Her mom, her sister, her room. Home where she owned the demons; they didn't own her. Where she didn't have to worry about being a slave or a whore.

Well, not have to worry until they found out. And they would find out. Spike would open his big mouth or…

No, it would just be written on her face. They'd see her, and they'd know what she had done to survive in this world. They'd know that she'd fucked demons. God, what would her mother say? How could Buffy possibly explain all the things she'd done? To her mom…her sister. Dawn, she had to be a role model for Dawn. And when she got back she'd be...

A whore. That's what she'd be. Forever. They'd be so disappointed in her. They'd tell her that there had been another way. That there are always other ways.

Her eyes were wet. "Why - " Buffy stopped as the lump formed in her throat. She swallowed. "Why do you get this?" She looked around the lab. "The partnership? The…freedom? While I've been fucking demons for the past five years?" She shook her head. "It's not fair!"

Avery looked away. "Life often isn't."

Buffy scooted her chair back to get some distance. She tried not to cry. She really did. But her mother's face kept appearing in her mind, letting her know exactly what she had to look forward to if she did get home. "They're gonna hate me."

"Who?"

"My family. My friends. They'll...god, I'm so dirty. They'll see it. And they'll hate it. And me..." Buffy trailed off, unable to talk anymore. She curled inward, hiding her face from the other woman.

This was it. The reason she couldn't go home. She couldn't possibly show her face back in Sunnydale after all she'd done. They'd never look at her the same way again. The Buffy they knew had died years ago, and she was just a used and dirty substitute. Faded away by years of fucking and drugs. She felt closer to the demons now than she did the humans.

One by one, she noted down what each of her friends' reactions would be. And her mother. It always came back to her mother. She was supposed to be the hero. Instead, she was a disappointment.

"Mom, I've spent the last five years in another dimension. I survived by becoming a prostitute."

"A whore? Buffy, there had to have been another way to get by. I thought you were stronger than that. Dawn, get out of here. I don't want you around your sister."

"Ew, Buffy! Why'd you let them do that to you? You're the Slayer, right?"

"Buff, did you have to screw them? I mean, self-respect just vanish through the portal or something?"

"Hey, Buffy, it's okay. I mean, I guess it's understandable that you had to be a...you know...hooker over there. Cause fighting all the time? Kinda tiring. And, you know, doing that might be easier. And...well, did you enjoy it? Cause, demons...kinda ick. But maybe you enjoyed it…which is kinda ick. But...hey at least we still have Faith as the Slayer, right?"


She couldn't go back. Buffy couldn't face that. She wasn't strong enough.

"I never knew my family," Avery said, breaking through Buffy's thoughts.

Buffy didn't answer, but her crying slowed. Instead of the sobs she'd had before, she just had unstoppable tears running down her face.

"Wyver's the closest thing I've got to family," Avery continued. She laughed. "He told me that he knew what my other owners had done to me, but he doesn't care. Because as long as I'm with him, I'm a free woman."

As long as she's with him…Buffy smiled. "What's he sick with? Will we get to meet him?"

Avery looked back down at the book in front of her, "Probably not. He fell ill a few days ago. He's really not up to seeing anybody." She paused. "We can break that sealing spell on you."

Buffy's heart forgot to beat for a brief second. She'd almost forgotten about that. "How do you know? I mean, do you know how they sealed my powers?"

Avery glanced at her. "I can see your aura. It's restrained. It wants to burst out, but it's trapped." She smoothed out the page with her finger. "I can free it."

"How?"

"We'll have to wait until tomorrow night. We need the full moon. But there is a ritual. It won't be difficult."

"Will it hurt?" Buffy remembered the pain that came when she had lost her powers. She couldn't help but be afraid of going through that again.

Avery shrugged. "I don't know. I've never had a sealing spell taken off me before." She folded the corner of the page before closing the book. "Why don't you and Spike settle down for the day? Get some rest. I'll work on translating your book on portals in the meantime." She stood. "Let me show you where you can sleep."

Avery led Buffy to a small guest room containing one bed and nothing else. The living area of the house was tiny. Just a short hallway with a few rooms attached. The master bedroom was off-limits due to Wyver's illness, and the bedroom at the end of the hall belonged to Avery. Buffy's host left her alone in the empty, desolate guest room.

She sat down on the bed, trying to keep the springs from creaking. She didn't know where Spike was. Avery seemed unconcerned about his absence, but Buffy was not used to being separated from him for so long.

Okay, so she'd been getting tired of him always stepping in to protect her from things. But she had grown accustomed to his company, twisted as that may seem. And especially now, when she was, again, having second thoughts about going home...she wanted him there to set her straight. She needed him to tell her what she wanted, because what she actually wanted wasn't good for her and she knew it.

God, she was so fucked up.

Now that they'd actually arrived here and they were one step closer to getting home, all her fears kept bouncing around in her head. The worst was the knowledge that she could have left Trevil. Many times. She had had ample opportunity to walk out of the brothel to freedom.

But she never had. She had stayed with him. She had stayed and she fucked and she snorted the coke and she was happy to be there.

The very thought disgusted her.

Her room there at the brothel. The cushy bed with the luxurious throw pillows. She stayed there. The door was unlocked. The path to the outside was clear. Buffy knew that. She always knew that. And yet, she stayed. She stayed and waited for Trevil to send a customer in to her.

She disgusted her.

"Well, the room's not that bad, Slayer."

Buffy looked up as Spike entered the room. He tossed the duffel in the corner and shed his duster before closing the door. Buffy realized that she still had tears streaking down her face. She hurriedly brushed at her cheeks, trying to wipe the tears away.

"Where've you been?" Buffy asked in a quivery voice. She cleared her throat, hoping he wouldn't notice. Or wouldn't care.

Spike shrugged, "Looking through some of the books they have in that lounge. Interesting stuff about this world."

"What 'stuff'?"

"Just stuff." Spike obviously wasn't willing to share. He looked back over at her. "What's with the waterworks?"

She didn't answer the question. "Avery says she can take the sealing spell off. Tonight. The full moon."

"Be back up to your full strength, then."

"Yeah," Buffy said. "Spike, I don't think I can go back to Sunnydale."

He crossed his arms, standing directly before where she sat in the bed. He looked down at her. "Uh-huh. And what's the problem now?"

Buffy kept her eyes on the checkered pattern of the bedspread so she wouldn't have to look at him. "I just think it's best if I don't go back. So they won't know...what I've done. I mean, I can help you go back, and you can just tell them I...I dunno...I died. Tell them I died."

Buffy felt the weight of the bed shift as Spike sat beside her, but she continued not looking at him. An overbearing silence fell over them.

Finally Spike spoke. "Don't know 'bout that, pet. Think your mum might hit me with an axe again. And not the blunt side this time."

She knew she was supposed to laugh at that, but she didn't have it in her. She tried for a smile but ended up sniffling. Then she started crying. Again. Dammit.

Buffy startled when Spike touched her shoulder. When he slid his hand across her back in an attempt to put his arm around her, Buffy pushed him away and backed up against the wall.

"Don't touch me!" she shrieked. She'd been touched by enough demons. One more and who knew what she might turn into?

She huddled by the wall where the bed met the corner of the room. Spike kept his distance after her outburst.

"Tell you what, pet. I know all about what you used to do, but none of that matters now that you're with me. We're partners, yeh?" He sighed. "'Sides, you'll get your powers back soon and be the Slayer again."

She gave no response. Her skin was still crawling from where he had touched her.

After a few moment's silence, Spike scooted himself across the bed so his back was against the wall and leaned his head back. "Get some sleep, yeh? Got an odd feeling 'bout this. It's that woman. She's not quite right."

Buffy leaned her head against the wooden paneling, trying not to think about what might happen if she got back through the portal. Home had seemed an impossibly distant place up until now. Now that it was hovering on the horizon she found herself terrified of it.

It had been easier. How had it been easier?

Oh yeah. The drugs. When she was on her drugs, everything had been better. Nothing had mattered.

If only she could have a hit.

She let her gaze wander to the side where Spike had fallen asleep sitting up against the wall. Avery had said that Wyver had a stash of stuff somewhere. If Buffy could find it…

But she wasn't supposed to do that stuff anymore. She was stronger than that.

Wasn't she?

But her life had been so much better on it. It had been bearable. And now she felt life crushing her. She couldn't breathe with the weight of her own actions on her shoulders. The drugs…well, they could lighten the load.

Nobody would have to know. Just one hit. Then everything would be better.

Buffy unfolded her legs, moving lightly so as to not make the bed springs creak. She padded gently across the room, wincing as the door squeaked loudly on its hinges. She stood statue-still, anticipating Spike's response.

There was none. He mumbled and shifted in his sleep, but that was all.

She sighed in relief before leaving, closing the door behind her.

If Wyver had his own personal stash, then he probably had it in his room with him. Buffy regretted disturbing him while he was ill, but, then again, he'd most likely be sleeping anyway. It was worth the risk.

Buffy felt like a little kid sneaking into her parent's bedroom. Though it was dark, she could see the body lying on the bed on the other side of the room, and she held her breath in an attempt to not make any noise.

So focused was she on not breathing that she completely missed the fold in the rug beneath her feet. Her toe snagged the wrinkle, causing her to trip and almost fall forward onto the bed. She caught herself but not before letting out a small yell in her panic.

She stopped then as her eyes focused on the figure on the bed. It was a demon, alright. A hunched-over, older-looking demon. Blood-soaked, elongated fingers splayed against the crimson sheets. There were large, glistening gashes on its neck where blood still slowly leaked out onto the bed. His eye remained open from when he died, a look of stark desperation and shock on his alien face.

Buffy backed away. Wyver was dead. Very dead. Spike? He had been missing for a while. But why would he kill the wizard who was supposed to help them? Spike had been acting oddly lately. Perhaps he'd changed his mind about this whole "going home" thing. Maybe Wyver had said something to offend Spike. Buffy had been a witness to Spike's demonic bloodlust before. She could easily imagine him being responsible for a scene such as this.

So much blood. Splattered all across the bed, on the floor, on the walls. It had been a massacre.

Buffy jumped when her backwards motion was impeded. She whirled around to see Avery standing behind her. The other woman was looking at Wyver's body with a distant stare.

Buffy gripped her arm, trying for a comforting gesture. She knew the woman would be in shock at the news. "Avery, he's dead."

Avery bit her lip while nodding. "I know." She placed her hand over Buffy's. "I killed him."

***

The attic had proven to be the perfect place for Jigal to stay while the two visited the wizard. His enhanced hearing enabled him to listen to the conversations going on below him. Unfortunately, it also meant he was dangerously close to the vampire, and Jigal was certain that his presence had been detected while on the road.

Now, though, he had to contact Dehevret. His orders prompted him to send word if an emergency occurred.

He had a bowl of water with him and he sprinkled the familiar herbs across it. Dehevret's face appeared but did little to calm Jigal's nerves.

"Master, there is a complication." Jigal noticed the barely-perceptible flicker of annoyance across his master's face. His breathing came faster. "It's the vampire's slave…"

"Yes, of course. I suppose I should have expected that," Dehevret said without Jigal even having to explain what the problem was. "Jigal, it looks like we'll need to go to our contingency plan. I'm relying on you now."

That's what Jigal had been frightened of. He began to tremble, but he tried not to let his fear show. "Yes, Master," he said. "I won't disappoint you."

tbc...


 
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