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Return to You by Thianna
 
3 - His Face
 
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Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox studios. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.


Buffy could feel her cheeks warm slightly at Dawn’s comment but Collin didn’t seem to notice.

“Uhm… there’s a tele in the room to your right if that’s what you want to do or we’ve got more books and paintings in the study.”

“Well what do you feel like doing?” Buffy asked.

“Me? We’ll Giles has had me cooped up doing bloody research all day. I was heading downstairs to do some uhm … stress relief when you arrived.”

“Stress relief? So what do Watchers do for fun? I don’t think I’ve ever seen Giles do anything really fun.”, she asked curiously.

With a grin, Collin walked towards the end of the hallway, opening a heavy wooden door for her. Buffy slowly climbed down the stairs and then waited for him to lead the way once they reached the bottom. He turned on the lights to reveal a fairly large recreational room complete with a bar, pool table and large screen TV. “Nice!”, she said observing the room then chuckling softly as she caught sight of a Playstation2 sitting on top of an antique coffee table, looking so out of place.

“Yeah it is… but.. this isn’t where I do stress relief.” Collin hurried off to the opposite side of the room. Buffy watched him intently wondering what he was doing to the wall. She heard something click and a section of the wall opened up to reveal that it was actually a door to another room.

Collin gave Buffy a smile and stood to the side of the doorway, waiting for her. Cautiously she entered and as he turned the lights on she was both amazed and curious about her companion. The room was a gym. Well a Slayer’s gym -- punching bags, targets and dummies but that wasn’t what made it a Slayer’s gym. There were stakes and swords strewn against one wall while a mirror covered the wall adjacent to it.

“This is what you do to unwind?” she asked in disbelief.

“Why, don’t you?,” he said as he took some bandage from a small cabinet in the corner and proceeded to wrap up his wrists. “You’ve still got it, Slayer. I can tell by those moves you’ve been teaching Emily. How many times a week do you train, pet?”

“Not as much as before. Guess I workout now more for getting the flab off my rear.”

There was a twinkle in his eye and a smirk on his lips as his eyes wandered over said rear. Buffy felt a little conscious with his eyes on her and nervously looked for a place to sit down. Eyeing a bench near the door, she quickly took a sit.

“Well, I’m amazed that you’ve maintained most of your skills just by instinct.” Collin said as he concentrated once again on wrapping his wrists.

“Well… let’s just say I’ve had more than my fair share of training over the years.”

“If I recall from Mr. Giles’ files, there was something about having a hard time getting you to do anything he said.”

“That’s not true!”

Collin sucked his cheeks in and raised an eyebrow. “Hey, I saw the report”

“That should be private.”

“Private? It’s part of the archives, love. Don’t get all shirty about it. You know he was ... is proud of you.” He finished supporting his wrists and turned towards the small CD player beside him. “You mind?” Buffy shook her head.

For the next couple of minutes, there really wasn’t much to say. She watched him work the punching bag and half listened to the music he had playing in the background. She wondered if Giles in his younger years did the same things Collin did. He apparently had a delinquent side to him but aside from that one time when all the adults in town acted like teenagers, she had never seen Giles act “improper” as he so aptly described her a number of times.

Buffy could understand now why Emily depended on her older brother so much. He was skilled and confident and it was fairly obvious now that he most probably had his fair share, if not more, of slaying or at least fighting as his sister. The music died down as the song ended. Collin stopped to catch his breath and looked her way. “Hope I’m not boring you.” With a smile, Buffy shook her head

“Uhm ... actually I’m kind of glad you decided to stay, Slayer.”

Buffy raised her eyebrows in surprise “Really? Why is that?”

“Well ... Actually, there is something I’ve been meaning to ask you,” he asked cautiously, waiting for her to nod before continuing. “Well you’ve been a Slayer for like ten years, right?”

“Almost eleven actually”, Gah. Buffy thought silently… “It’s been that long?”

“Right … Well I read somewhere that you were ... uhm ... involved with a vampire named Angel.”

Sighing softly, she hoped that his questioning wasn’t going to lead to anything personal but at least she was glad he was somewhat tact about it. She could only imagine what he had read about her relationship with Angel. “Yeah? And?” she said checking her manicure, trying to dismiss his line of questioning as unimportant and hoping he’d lose interest in the subject.

“Well , I’m actually more curious about one of his, uhm … children -- the one called William the Bloody.”

Buffy’s heart sank, she should have known this was coming. Giles disapproved of her relationship with Spike. It was bad enough she fell for a vampire once but to have fallen for one that had killed two Slayers. She knew everyone thought she was somewhat of kilter. Since he wasn’t officially part of Watcher Council at the time, any notes he might have, are most probably personal. But how long was it going to remain that way? She was sure that there are or will be people interested in studying that relationship. Her cheeks warmed by both anger and embarrassment and she found herself slowly biting her lower lip, trying to control the wave of emotions suddenly welling up from the mention of his name.

“According to the archives he was partly responsible for the closing of the Hellmouth three years ago. Then, it was stated that he started working in Wolfram and Hart with Angel. And then nothing. He disappears.”

“I know just as much as you Collin, “she said, trying to hide the sadness in her voice. “No one knows where Spike is”, though silently she wished she did.

“I need to find him … I’ve got questions that need answering.”

“Questions? What would you possibly want with Spike?”

He turned his back to her no longer sure if it was a good idea to strike up this conversation. She was the only one that had the most profound effect on Spike. He felt sure that perhaps she could give him some clue as to the vampire’s whereabouts. As for his reasons? “It’s a little personal”

“Well you brought it up and now you’ve got me all curious.”

His reasons? Now the tables were turned. He should have expected her to want to know why. It was complicated and painful and maybe even a little selfish. He had questions and Spike had the answers. Ever since he learned about this vampire called Spike, he had been driven to find out everything he could about him. The archives held information about demons and vampires but only to an intellectual extent. He even looked at any records related to the two Slayers killed by said vampire and all they had was a mention of his name. He had heard Giles recount what had happened three years ago but it just wasn’t what he was looking for. He stole a quick glance and saw the mix of emotions in her eyes. Would she understand his reasons? Would she even care? She had just met him a month or so ago and here he is prying into her private life.

He focused on the punching bag in front of him then closed his eyes and with a heavy sigh moved his head to lean against it. Should he tell? He knew that once he told her, she would think him insane but what was the other option? He could lie or change the subject, but part of him felt that she deserved the truth. He did bring it up in the first place. He took another deep breath to calm himself as he told her what was on his mind. “Do you know what it’s like to share your bloody sodding face with that of a killer? … When I look at myself in the mirror, sometimes I don’t know who I am.”
 
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