Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox studios. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

**


Chapter 31 - You Don’t Know Me

Spike looked on in terror as he watched Buffy's labored breathing. He pulled from her. Maybe he pulled too much. He cradled her in his arms, holding her close to him as he tried to assess her condition. Her heart was still beating and that gave him a little peace. He was lost in his thoughts wondering how he could have let the bloodlust consume him. All he wanted to do was keep her safe so why did he find himself in this predicament.

He reached out with one hand to pick up the phone receiver. He tilted his head to place it between his shoulder and his cheek as he dialed Marissa's number.

"Marissa! … Pet! ... I need your help quick."

"Spike? What happened?" her sweet voice answered with concern.

"Buffy … it‘s Buffy. I didn‘t mean to. I … I pulled too much ... I ... "

"Shhh... Calm down dear. Give me one second."

He heard a click and before he could even put the receiver back on its cradle, he sensed Marissa outside the bedroom door. He looked up and was thankful that she was here.

"Come in pet." he called out.

Marissa opened the door and shook her head seeing Buffy in his arms. Blood still stained Spike's lips and one would have thought that the woman in his arms was dead from her stillness. She moved to the other side of the bed, kneeling down as she placed a hand on Buffy's forehead. She closed her eyes as her hand glowed lightly.

Spike held Buffy tightly, concentrating on the sound of her heart beat. He let that beat fill his senses as if willing it to beat stronger for him.

"She's okay Spike. She is the Slayer after all."

"But I ... "

Marissa shook her head. "You just think you did and I think she wasn't ready for it."

"I know how much I drank, Marissa. You don't need to be nice to me." he said holding on to his beloved tightly.

Marissa gave him a slightly annoyed smirk for questioning her. "Her heart is strong and her body is compensating for the blood loss. She is nowhere near death. She's a fighter."

Spike nodded though still a little uneasy but he trusted Marissa’s conclusion.

"Let her sleep, dear. The rest would do her good." she said as she stood up. "She should be fine Spike. Don't worry okay."

"Thanks pet."

Marissa said. "You know where to find me if you need me." She turned and made her way out the room.

Spike heard her leave through the hotel room door and breathed a sigh of relief that he didn't hurt Buffy that much.

"Ouch. Spike ... " he heard her weak voice.

"What, love?"

"When ... did your grip ... get this strong?"

"Huh?" He looked down where his hand was clamped around her upper arm. He didn't think he was holding her any different from the other times but when he released her, the skin underneath told him the truth. It was turning pink, bordering on a sickly pastel of blues revealing the bruise he had inflicted. It was then that he realized other things that were happening to him. He had turned to his human visage minutes ago, but his senses still felt like he had his demon out. He could feel power surging through him. Perhaps it was the Slayer blood. But it never did this to him before. Then again, he had never drunk so much from her before either.

"Spike? What happened? My neck ... "

"My fault. I don't know what came over me."

"I just want to sleep. Feel so tired."

"I know, pet. I know.“ He said gently caressing her hair. “You need your rest, love." he said as he carefully climbed out of bed hoping not to disturb her. He walked out of the bedroom and plopped into a chair to watch some telly. His new found power gave him the ability to monitor her even from out here. He could hear her breathing and her heart beat loud and clear as if he was sitting right beside her. What was this? How could he do this? He gripped the remote control tighter in his right hand and felt a slight sting. Letting the remote control go, he looked at his palm and saw the now fading line of his wound. It was the wound that Dru had inflicted on him in her rage. Wait? Dru? No. He didn't see Dru at all last night. He saw Darla, well for but a moment, but not Dru. So where did that memory come from? What was he doing last night? He met with the Master. They had a conversation. Then … Then? It all seemed fuzzy. What happened?

Spike watched the images flicker on the television screen, not really concentrating on them. He wanted to figure out what just happened. He had a feeling he just got played and if he did, then he just entered into a much bigger game with his and Buffy's existence possibly up for grabs.


**

"Spike?" Buffy calling his name roused him from sleep. He somehow managed to walk back into the bedroom with his eyes only half-opened. Buffy was sitting up in bed with a look of confusion on her face.

"I'm here. Feeling better?"

"I guess. I'm a little hungry."

"Well that's a good sign. I thought I ... "

"Spike don't. I'm fine so don't worry."

Spike lowered his eyes. "I ... I hurt you!" he said with utter anguish.

"I wanted it. We both wanted it. I could have stopped you if I didn't really want it."

"No, Buffy. Stop rationalizing it for me. And I don't think you would have been able to stop me. I was determined to take from you last night. I was ready to do what you've been asking me to do for the longest time. The only difference is, I wanted it this time not the other way around."

"What made you stop?"

Spike closed his eyes and tried to run the scene over in his head. He really wasn't sure what made him stop. Even now when he looked at her, he wanted to take her. His demon faded in and out as he tried to take control. "Didn't think you were ready for it yet." he lied.

"Spike? What's wrong?"

"What are you talking about? I said I didn't think you were ready for it!"

"You don't have to be so defensive about it. I was just concerned. I know you wouldn't hurt me." she said with a little pout.

"Buffy ... how can you be so sure? You don't know me."

"Huh? Of course I know you Spike. We've been together for months now."

Spike shook his head. "I've been alive way longer than that, pet. No, you haven't really seen who I am. You don't know what I can do. You don't know how close I was last night."

"But you didn't go through with it."

"Buffy are you even listening to what I'm saying?! You haven't seen me lose control. You don't know what vampires do when the bloodlust takes over."

"But Spike you'd never do ... "

Spike let out a low annoyed rumble. "BUFFY! No, you don't know that. I've kept my demon reigned in for as long as you've known me."

"But I've seen you unleash it on people when you feed."

"No you don't. That’s just me feeding. There was no real need to fight. It was just my face when I want to eat. You don't know what I'm like if the demon takes over completely. Do you want to know the truth?"

Buffy nodded slowly.

"I almost killed you last night. I almost turned you in the very thing that you were meant to kill." Spike moved closer, sitting down on the bed beside her. " And though the thought of that doesn't seem to affect you, there is a darkness ... a hatred ... an evil that could have consumed you." his thoughts went briefly to that of his mother. It was a painful memory. Even after all these years it stung. The one woman he loved and devoted himself to in his human years was destroyed by his own hands. He wasn't about to make the same mistake with Buffy. The notion of spending the rest of his unlife with her forever was more than alluring but he loved her as she is now. To turn her would destroy this Slayer that he had grown to love. "Buffy... I lost control last night. The bloodlust took over. I don't know what's going on and certain things about last night seem like a blur. You have to promise me something, love."

"Spike, what are you getting at."

"Buffy, when the time comes... when the bloodlust takes over. You might have to ... "

Buffy shook her head, tears staining her cheeks at the thought of what he was asking.

"Buffy!" he said grabbing her arms. "When the time comes, you have to do it. You have to promise me."

"No. I won't do it. I love you! I know you can fight it Spike."

He shook his head. "Something's happening, pet. I don't know what but I need you to be ready for what you might have to do."

"I won't do it."

"You won't have a choice."

"I would rather be turned and be with you than be the one responsible for your end."

Spike hung his head and released his hold on her. "I love you too, Buffy. But ... " he thought then sighed. He'll have to convince her somehow.



**
The sound of an angry growl echoed through the Aurelius Clan's Mansion. "Impudent boy! Breaking my thrall. Having the fortitude to save the Slayer once more. I will have her blood! I will have it. She will strengthen this family. She will reshape it. If only dear William can see this. The boy lacks vision!"

None of the other vampires that were in the room dared to raise their eyes at the Master. They knew better than to look upon him when he was angry.

"Tell me, what of the Watchers that our wayward William has asked you to dispose of?"

"One of them is dead. The other two are being held and treated as you have requested, Master."

"Good. … In due time our honored guests will join the party. But for now, send a few of our friends to visit them."