Kindred Series

Kindred: (noun) A group of related persons, such as a family, clan, or tribe.
(adj.) Having a similar or related origin or nature.






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BOOK ONE
JOURNALS & JOURNEYS
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Chapter Three
Speak of the Devil

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Giles was a bit late getting to the Magic Box the next day. It wasn’t easy getting up after so little sleep and quite a bit of celebrating. He didn’t notice that anything was amiss at first, but then he heard a noise in the training room. He knew it wasn’t Anya since he’d given her the morning off. She deserved it. What a hard worker that girl is, and so bright and talented. Lovely actually… Where was I again? Oh, yes. No one else had keys to the place, so that meant an intruder. Giles picked up a sword from the display case and cautiously edged toward the door. Perhaps he could take whoever it was off-guard. Silently he nudged the door open and stared at the quietly retreating figure before him. The lithe brown-haired man in jeans and a t-shirt wasn’t carrying anything and didn’t appear to have any merchandise hidden on his person. Since the money was put up in the safe each night or taken to the bank night drop, Giles was a bit confused by what the would-be thief might have actually taken or wanted to take. So caught up in his own musings, he didn’t actually say anything until the intruder had opened the back door to leave. As sunlight washed over him, illuminating his frame, Giles recovered his wits and took a few steps into the room. “I say, chap. Mind telling me why you broke into my shop?”

The man immediately stopped and turned around, but didn’t say anything right away. The glare from outside prevented Giles from actually seeing the man’s face, but when he spoke, there was no doubt who it was standing before him. “Hallo, Rupert. I had just given up on you. Late night?”

Giles lowered the sword and stared in amazement as Spike shut the back door and walked toward him. Neither spoke for a moment. Giles was trying to process too many things at once to speak, and Spike was giving him time to adjust. Giles let the facts register one at a time – Spike standing in front of him, same cockney accent (would recognize that voice anywhere), brown hair and curly at that, not baking in the sunlight (actually looks like he has a tan), wearing glasses, not being sarcastic or nasty for a change. This is just too much to compute, system overload possible. I need a cup of tea. Spike smiled, genuinely enjoying the expressions and emotions flitting across Giles’ face.

“I made us a spot o’ tea earlier, but I didn’t realize you’d be so late today or I would have waited.” He smiled ruefully and indicated they should sit down. “I know you’ve got lots of questions and so do I, but first I have to know if you’re expecting any of the other Scoobies any time soon. I’m not ready to see them just yet.

Giles shook his head and struggled to find words as Spike poured them each a cup of tea. “No. Xander is at work. I gave Anya the morning off. She’ll be in after lunch though. And Buffy was taking Dawn shopping today. Some sort of high school dance coming up. I’m certain they won’t be coming up for air any time soon.” He sipped the tea and smiled appreciatively. Nothing like a proper cuppa. Who knew this berk could make one?

Spike noticed and grinned. Raising his cup in mock salute, they drank silently for a moment. Then Spike shook his head. “All right then, to business. First, can we talk back here? I want to keep a low profile.”

“Yes, I can see the front door from here.”

“Good. I don’t know exactly where to start, but I need to let you know that I was in here the other day and overheard you and Buffy. I was trying to get a handle on what had happened while I was gone. I saw Buffy and followed her to the Sunnydale Asylum where I found out about Red. I was a bit wigged out by what I learned there, so I came here next. I came in through the back. You should really think about changing that lock, by the way. Anyone can just walk right in.” Spike smirked slightly. “When I arrived, Buffy was already here, and you two were talking about Willow, so I listened. Then you started talking about me, and I couldn’t leave without hearing that. I know I shouldn’t have eavesdropped, but I couldn’t help myself.” He paused a moment. “Anyway, I wanted you to know that I heard what you said about me and I appreciate it. Truly. It means a lot to me.” Another pause. “Oh, and I wanted to apologize for eavesdropping…and breaking in, too.” he added hastily.

Giles had to laugh at Spike apologizing for a little B&E and eavesdropping given his past. Spike looked surprised at first, then joined him. After a few moments, the both got serious again. Giles spoke first. “Why don’t we talk about what you’ve missed here first. I have a feeling those questions may be easier to answer. How much do you know?”

“Enough to put most of it together. That chap Warren apparently shot and killed Tara, and that sent Willow off the deep end. She was juiced up on the dark magic, tore up the town, killed Warren, apparently wrecked the Magic Box (although it looks pretty sharp now – good repair job), tried to kill Warren’s two little cronies in crime, tried to end the world and had a mental meltdown of some kind. Now I don’t have a problem with her killing that bloody dealer, Rack. He was bad news and not really human anyway. And Warren probably got what was coming to him in the end. But Red’s in real bad shape and it isn’t just from her trip to the dark side. Something else is responsible for the current state she’s in. Somethin’ ugly that’s not going to leave easily or quietly. We’re goin’ to have a fight on our hands if we want to get her back whole.”

“Spike, back up a bit. I didn’t follow you round that last bend. What do you know about Willow’s condition that I don’t?”

“Are you familiar with this symbol?” he pulled a drawing out of his pants pocket. “It’s a brand.” he continued as Giles studied the paper. “Certain demons will brand humans in their service. Marks them as chattel, you know, keeps the competition away from what’s yours, helps you locate them more easily when you want their services. Works a bit like a tracking device. Similar to a vampire’s mark, but different. Where the brand is placed is highly significant. Brands on the back and shoulders are most common because they can be easily covered. You get my drift?”

Giles nodded, starting to realize where this was leading. “You found this symbol on Willow, didn’t you?” Spike nodded gravely. “Aye. This one is easy to miss unless you happen to be looking for it. This is etched into the skin on the back of her neck just above the nape. Hard to see through that mop of red hair, but it’s definitely there. Giles, the only time the brand is placed there is when the person in question is being used as a vessel to carry or hide something. I’m not familiar enough with that specific symbol to know exactly what we’re dealing with here, but I know this is serious. It’s been content to stay hidden – all wrapped up in Willow for some time now – probably since her attempt to end the world. So, you can bet it’s something particularly nasty.”

“Of course,” Giles said. “Why didn’t I think of this before now? Willow was channeling some pretty powerful forces at the end before she shut down. She was emotional, unstable, and completely open to the dark magicks. There’s no telling what could have decided to hitch a ride with her when things started flowing. I’ll get started researching this symbol right away. Thank you for showing this to me, Spike.” Spike nodded in return.

“Whatever it turns out to be, Giles, I’ll help you defeat it for Willow’s sake, but I want your solemn word that you won’t share anything about my involvement in this with Buffy and the others. They don’t need to know what role I played or that I’m even here yet.”

“Well, all right, I’ll keep your secret on the condition that you tell me why you’re so adamant about not seeing or talking to the others. Xander I can certainly understand, but you heard what Buffy had to say the other day. You know she wants to see you and you must realize how much Dawn has missed you. Why don’t you want to see the two of them?”

“It’s too complicated to fully explain, but I’ll try to do it justice. You know what went down between me and Buffy right before I left town. I won’t pretend that I’m proud of that, because I’m not – at all. However, that night was a turning point for me. I was wracked by guilt afterward and I didn’t understand what I was feeling or why. I knew I was trapped somewhere between two states of being – man and monster…good and evil, so to speak. I had tried to be a good man, but I couldn’t. I kept messing things up royally, and when I did manage to do something right, then my motives were questioned. I couldn’t be a man, but how could I be a monster either? The damn chip wouldn’t let me go back to my old ways. I decided that I had to make a choice and change things for myself or die trying. I couldn’t live like that anymore. So, I left…” Spike trailed off as he relived that moment of decision.

“Where did you go?” Giles asked curiously and then proceeded to lose all color whatsoever when he heard the answer. He gaped at Spike in absolute amazement.

“So, you faced the tests and passed, or you wouldn’t be sitting here now.” Giles stated. Spike nodded while looking Giles straight in the eye. “And afterward the demon granted your request.” Another nod. No flinching. Still maintaining eye contact. “Dare I ask what that was?” Spike smiled and said simply, “My soul. It restored my soul.” The words hung poignantly in the air between them. Neither spoke for several minutes, both pondering the magnitude of that statement.

Finally Giles spoke again. “What happened next, Spike?”

“I don’t remember the next few days all that clearly, to be honest. He gave me what I asked for all right, and it hurt like hell. Felt like he’d seared my skin off, then put it back on but stitched it back a little too tight. I was disoriented, dazed…I wandered for some time. Ended up in a jungle somewhere. Woke up at midday in the middle of a clearing with the sunlight streaming down on me. I was still a bit out of it at that point and it was a while before I even realized that I sunlight wasn’t affecting me. Once that sank in, it gave me reason to pause. I just enjoyed the feel of the sun beating down on me for some time. As I sat there, I realized that I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I was human again! I felt drunk as all these dizzying realizations swept over me. I laughed out loud and shouted in fierce joy. I was still there chuckling to myself (not sure how much later – could have been days) when this couple found me. Are you familiar with Mitchell and Ruth Crispin?” Off Giles surprised nod and sharp look, “Yeah, they said you’d remember them well enough. Guess I’m not the only one with a story to tell, eh?”

“Well, apparently they had gotten wind of something odd happening and they were actually out searching for me. I didn’t realize that at the time. I thought they were just some local missionary types doing a good deed. They gave me some food and water and helped me to my feet. I was a little bit unsteady at first, so they supported me while we walked. I was feeling a tad better and had just opened my mouth to ask them what day it was, when a vicious jungle cat attacked us. I reacted without even thinking. I vamped out and dispatched the cat in short work. I didn’t feed on it and I had no desire to do so, but I was some kind of shocked when I realized that I had on my gameface. I got a bit wigged by this, I guess. I, uh, basically passed out – heat stroke, dehydration, shock, maybe a combination of all of them.” Giles was surprised to see that Spike was actually blushing at this point.

“Anyway, the Crispins carried me back to their camp and tended to me there. I woke up a couple of days later in a cool room lying on a bed and actually needing the sheets because it was chilly. Took me a bit of time before I realized it hadn’t been a dream. Pinched myself hard, felt my pulse, stuff like that. Was pleased as punch by all that too, let me tell you. Then I bloody well remembered vamping out and I got up after that to see what was what. Got dressed and walked out into the living room. The Crispins were sitting down to dinner and I just stopped and stared at them. I had no idea at all what to say to them, but they both smiled at me all warm and welcoming. Then Ruth, she says, ‘William. It’s good to see you up. Do you feel like joining us for dinner?’ Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather when she said my name.” Spike smiled fondly at that memory. “That was without a doubt the best meal of my life or unlife. They made me feel so welcome and accepted. They answered all my questions as best they could, filled me in on what they knew and just talked to me like I was a regular Joe. No one’s ever treated me like that before – like an equal – not even when I was alive. I finally had to stop them and ask them why they were being so nice to me. Hadn’t I vamped out in front of them before? They assured me that I had indeed done that, but that they had examined me and I was most definitely alive now. Even though I had noticed the pulse and temperature myself, it was nice to have some positive confirmation. Then Mitchell asked me if I needed some blood and I realized I really didn’t need or want it. We calculated up the days and it had been 8 days since I’d last had blood prior to going in that cave. I didn’t know what to make of that, but I felt fine. The Crispins offered to let me stay with them… Said they’d try to help me get to the bottom of things.”

Spike paused and Giles was struck by the fondness he obviously had for Ruth and Mitchell, and while Giles could certainly understand anyone being attached to two such warm and loving people…Spike’s reaction was especially poignant. Poor bastard. He must have been craving acceptance so bad all along. Glad he found that even if he did have to go halfway around the world and through hell to do so. With a small start, Giles reconnected with the conversation as he realized that Spike had started speaking again while he was musing.

“…spent nearly 3 months with Ruth and Mitchell. They tested my reflexes, my blood, my strength, anything that might help to explain what was going on with me. Didn’t get too many scientific answers, I’m afraid. Figured I might need to seek my answers elsewhere. The Crispins were great, gave me money to buy a ticket out of there and loaned me their horse to get to town so I could buy the ticket. Ruth asked me to pick up some things for her at the trading post. So I left one morning to make arrangements for my departure. Was gone the greater part of the day…didn’t get back till well after dark. I was both excited and nervous about leaving…felt like I was about to start out on a journey that would surely change my life even more so than this last one. But I knew that I would miss Mitchell and Ruth. They treated me like family and I loved ‘em for it, Giles. I was thinking about this on my way back and trying to come up with an appreciative gesture that would let them know what they meant to me. Considered and rejected loads of ideas…nothing was good enough. Finally hit on something that I thought would please both of them. Felt right proud of myself for that. Smiled like a blithering idiot the rest of the way back.” Spike paused remembering, and his face turned up in a painful grimace as he continued bitterly. “Should have known the bloody Powers weren’t done screwing with me just yet.”

Giles heart wrenched painfully at that – both for the obvious pain reflected in Spike’s demeanor and for the ominous portent it suggested for his friends. After a long moment, Spike began speaking again quietly. “When I was about a mile out from the homestead, the scent hit me. I could smell blood, carnage…death. I pushed that horse as fast as it could go, but it was already too late long before I got there. They were both dead and I couldn’t save them.” His voice sounded hollow at that failure and Giles patiently waited him out. He would have time to mourn the dead later, but Spike was alive and here and needed him now. When he continued a moment later, his voice gained intensity. “It was demons. Nasty little band of Tertutio demons. Buggers like to torture their victims before killing them. Well they bloody well got their come-uppance that night.” Spike paused again and Giles had no doubt that the Crispins’ deaths had been well avenged and not one of those demons had lived to tell the tale. He regretted briefly that he hadn’t been there to help Spike. When he spoke again, Spike’s voice was thick with emotion. “I sat with their bodies until the sun rose. Told them how much I appreciated them, loved them even. When the sun came up, I prepared their bodies for a funeral pyre. Thought about burying them, seemed more respectful, but was afraid some wild critter would dig them up. Didn’t want their bodies defiled like that. Spent the day going through the house, sorting their stuff to see if they had anything written down about things to be sorted out to people or whatnot. Gathered up some books for you. Packed my stuff up and got ready to head back into town to catch that train. It was while looking for a change of clothes that I found a letter addressed to me. It was from the Crispins, said how much they thought of me…said they fancied me like a son.” Pause to gather emotions. “Said a bunch of other things that got me all choked up. Also had a key to a locker at the train station. The note said for me to take everything that was in the locker. Said they didn’t need it and wanted me to have it. I didn’t know what to make of that, but figured it was worth checking out when I got to town.”

“Ended up oversleeping the next day. Didn’t realize how tired out I was by the ordeal. Barely had time to grab the duffel bag inside the locker and catch my train. Almost didn’t make it. But finally I settled into a private car with some food and drink, and had a moment to myself to open that bag.” He paused for so long that Giles felt the tension building until Spike opened his mouth and came out with… “It was full of money, Giles. Stacks and stacks of bills – enough to satisfy Anya even!” They shared a small laugh at that comment. “I counted out just under a million dollars and then I was crying again like some misty-eyed nancy-boy poofter. Not because of the money, but because of these wonderful people who thought enough of me to give it to me. They wrote that note and gave me that money just because they wanted to do so. They loved me that much. I was overwhelmed by them...their capacity for love and their generosity. I still am.” he finished quietly.

Neither of them spoke for a few minutes. Finally Giles spoke up again. “My calculations bring you up to about 3 weeks ago. What did you do after that?”

“I had a few stops to make before coming here…some debts that needed repaying now that I had the means to do so. I got in town a few days ago and I’ve been trying to get a handle on everything since then. So far, you and Clem are the only ones who know I’m back, and that’s how I’d like it to stay for now.”

Giles nodded, not really listening but making a deductive leap in reasoning in a totally different area. “You’re the one who paid off Buffy’s house!” he suddenly exclaimed. Spike smiled almost shyly and nodded assent. “Did you also have anything to do with her new job?” Another nod. Giles stared at Spike amazed. “And why is it exactly that you don’t want her to know this?”

“Several reasons.” Pause. Deep breath. “First, I don’t want her thinking I’m trying to buy off her or Dawn. Second, I just want her to be happy. I don’t need the credit as long as the job gets done, if you know what I mean. Third, a lot has happened between us and I don’t know where we stand. I do want to find that out – more than anything. But first I have to figure out who and what I am. Until then, I have nothing to offer her. Fourth, some odd things came up in the Crispins’ tests and I don’t know what that means. Since the Powers That Be enjoy bollixing up my life so much, there’s no telling what comes next. I’ll be damned if I allow either Dawn or Buffy to be put into any danger because of me. I have to know they’ll be safe being around me. And, lastly, Red is one of Buffy’s best friends. Let’s fix that first…” his voice trailed off as his thoughts coalesced.

Giles looked at him understandingly and Spike found the courage to continue. “I don’t want to screw this up again, Giles. I love her, but I’ve made a real mess of things in the past. If I screw up again, that’s it. Game over. End of story. I know that… I’m not ready to face making that possibility a reality just yet.”

Giles was totally amazed by the extraordinary things Spike had just shared with him. And there was still more to come, if he was right about his suspicions. “Very well, Spike. I respect what you’ve shared with me today. Thank you for that confidence. I will honor it, I assure you. Ruth and Mitchell were incredible individuals and I’ve no doubt they meant it when they wanted you to have that money. They never had any kids and I don’t think you should feel guilty they chose to give it to you. And don’t focus on thinking you failed them. They easily could have been killed at any time prior to or after you arrived there. They knew the dangers when they chose to settle there. I’ve no doubt you would have defended them valiantly had you been there. But don’t waste time feeling guilty for something you had no control over, okay?” Spike nodded gratefully, swallowing the lump in his throat.

“I want to talk to you about these physical changes some more, Spike. I may be able to shed some light for you. But I need to check out a few things first, and I need to look into this symbol if we’re going to help out Willow. Anya should be in shortly, so it might be best it we took a break here and reconvened tonight at my flat.”

Spike nodded in agreement and they both stood. “Giles, just one more thing if you don’t mind.” He hesitated and looked anywhere but at Giles. Finally he looked up and said “I don’t think that it suits me just yet, but the I know that the other doesn’t fit me anymore. So, I think I’d prefer to be called William now.”

“Of course.” Giles said. “Then let me be the first to welcome you home, William.” And he extended the hand of friendship quite literally.

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