Chapter One

Anyone observing the vampire’s progress from the Slayer’s home on Revello Drive to his crypt in Restfield Cemetery would have been sure Spike was channeling three different people.

He would go along quietly for a while, a sweet smile on his face, practically humming.

(She let me touch her, let me kiss her, let me touch... she touched me!  She defended me to her corn fed boyfriend)

Then he would be reminded that she had shrunk away from him, horrified at herself and denying he was capable of loving her.  Soon, he would be in game face, snarling and kicking over signs and tombstones.

(Bloody, fuckin’ Poof! Got her convinced I can’t love without a soul.  As soon as she’s well, she’s gonna go rushin’ back to Capt’n Cardboard and she’ll probably deny there was ever anything between us.)

Memories of what she’d be denying – the things she’d allowed him to do to her, the things she’d done to him, soon had him swaggering and smirking as he relived the last couple of hours.

(She sucked my dick! The Slayer put her hot little mouth on me and got me off. And she came for me.  Made her scream, I did.  Like to see Capt’n Cardboard do that!)

He was so wrapped up in his rapidly changing inner movie, that he almost failed to notice the heartbeats coming from his open crypt.  A sudden whiff of an unfamiliar scent had him stopping to sniff the air and listen.  He blended back into the shadows to assess what his senses were telling him.  As rash and impulsive as Spike could be, he hadn’t survived 126 years as a vampire by being stupid.

He remained hidden in the dark shrubbery, still as only a corpse can be, and waited to see who or what was in his home.

(Well, there’s a surprise)  he thought when Riley and two of his friends stepped cautiously out of the door.  The commando was holding a wooden stake and his friend had a crossbow.

“Let’s call it a night, Finn,” Graham said wearily.  “He’s not here and who knows if he will be. You probably scared him off when you told Buffy you were coming over and he’s halfway to LA by now.”

Spike growled softly at the suggestion that he would run from Buffy at the first sign of danger.  He mentally cursed the chip in his head that made it impossible for him to follow his instincts and rip their heads off.

Riley glared around menacingly for several more minutes, then sighed and reluctantly agreed to leave.

“All right. I’ll get him some other time.  I’m sure he’s still around.  I’ll find him and when I do, I’ll make sure he knows never to come near her again.  Assuming he doesn’t take care of the problem himself, “ he added with a glance over his shoulder into the crypt.

“Exactly,” Graham said, slapping Riley on the back.  “At a minimum, he’ll get the message; and if you’re lucky.....” The two soldiers moved away and headed for the gate, their voices trailing off as they left.

When the sound of their booted feet was gone, Spike moved slowly toward his home.  He got almost to the door and then, deciding he’d rather enter through the sewers, he moved off to drop down the nearest manhole.  A quick sprint through the tunnels and he was entering his lower level bedroom and looking around cautiously.

The downstairs seemed undisturbed and he breathed a sigh of relief that they hadn’t discovered the door to that area.  He went up the ladder carefully and peeked out into the main room.  The first thing that caught his eye was the booby trap set up near his door.  A crossbow had been rigged to go off as soon as someone stepped into the thin wire running across the doorway.

He congratulated himself on his astute thinking as he disconnected the trap and added the crossbow to his stash of weapons.  He went back downstairs, changed his shirt and headed back to Buffy’s, traveling by way of the sewers just in case they were still out looking for him.

He got back to the house on Revello drive to find a sleeping Slayer curled up on the couch under the blanket.  Spike carefully turned off the lights in the house, then sat beside her for a few minutes just watching her sleep.  Her lips were slightly parted and her warm breath stirred tendrils of hair hanging in her face.  Without thinking, he reached a hand forward and gently moved the hair off her face.

The memory of his promise to leave her alone until they vanquished Glory, warred with the desire that he always felt around her.  Now that he’d felt those lips, tasted her essence, touched her skin, his demon was screaming to possess her at the same time that William was mentally composing poems to her.

Somewhat to Spike’s surprise, William won the battle and he was able to sit quietly and watch her sleep without feeling a need to rip off her clothes and make her his completely.

He watched her for a long time, then shook himself out of the pleasant fantasy he was having.  Bending down carefully, he gently picked her up, blanket and all, and began carrying her upstairs.  He hadn’t got very far when he felt her breathing increase and her heart rate go up.

She raiser her head from its resting place on his chest and breathed, “Spike?”

“You know any other vampires that’d be carrying your useless body around in the middle of the night, Slayer?” he asked with a smile that she heard rather than saw.  “And, by the way, pet, lettin’ a vamp watch you sleep and pick you up without waking up?  Not a good career move.”

He finished talking without being able to keep the edge of concern out of his voice.  Her Slayer senses should have told her there was a vampire in the room and he was worried that they hadn’t.

Buffy was quiet for a few seconds, then she said softly, “I knew it was you. I can always tell.”

He unconsciously pulled her a little tighter against his chest at her quiet confirmation that she was as aware of him as he was of her. 

When they reached the second floor and he started to turn toward her room, Buffy blushed and said, “not yet, Spike.  I really, really need to pee first.  You were gone a long time.”

“Sorry about that, pet.  Took a little longer than I expected.”

“Did you run into trouble?” she asked anxiously.  “Are there too many demons and vampires out there now?”

“Nothin’ I couldn’t handle, love.  And, no, there aren’t anymore than usual. Your watcher and I have been keepin’ them down for you.  Don’t worry yourself.”

“Oh.” She looked at him suspiciously, but decided not to press the issue. 

Spike carried her into the bathroom, set her down carefully beside the toilet, then backed out the door saying, “Give me a shout when you’re ready, Slayer.”

When Buffy had finished struggling with her sweats so that she could use the toilet, had washed her hands and brushed her teeth, she called Spike’s name softly and he instantly opened the door.  She smiled at him and said, “It’ll be nice to sleep in my own bed again for a change.  The couch was getting old.”

“Your mom should have called me sooner, pet.  No reason why I couldn’t have got you downstairs in the morning and back up here every night.”

As he spoke, he was scooping her up and edging through the door, being careful not to bump her head or her leg on the jamb.  He carried her into her room and stood her up while he quickly turned down the bed for her.  Buffy hobbled toward the bed and allowed herself to fall onto it, flailing around as she tried to turn over with casts on one arm and one leg.

“You look like a turtle what’s been flipped on its back, Slayer,” Spike chuckled as she squirmed around until she was on her back with her head on the pillow.  He pulled the blankets up over her and fought the urge to bend in and kiss her “good night.”  His hand lingered for a second as he pulled the covers up to her chin, but he remembered his promise and moved it firmly back to his side before it could get him in trouble.

“Very funny, Spike,” she grumbled to cover up how badly she wanted his hand to remain on her a little longer. 

He straightened up and took an unnecessary breath before turning off the light and moving toward the door.

“Good night, Slayer,” he said quietly.  “I’ll be downstairs if you need me for anything.”

“Good night, Spike.....and...and...thank you,” she almost whispered, knowing his vampire ears would hear her.

“You’re welcome, Buffy,” he whispered back as he went down the stairs.  “You’re welcome, love.”

*************************

The following morning as soon as Buffy started stirring, before she even had time to call for him, Spike was at her door asking if she wanted to get up yet.  He helped her sit up, then carried her to the bathroom, repeating the routine of the night before.  When she was finished in the bathroom, he took her back into her room and sat her down again while he brushed her hair.  As they had before, both of them got lost in the sensual pleasure of the activity.  Buffy relaxed as she enjoyed the feeling of gentle brush strokes on her head.  Spike was mesmerized by the scent and feel of her silky blond locks and he continued to brush long after her hair was hanging down her back smoothly.

Eventually Buffy’s stomach rumbled and the spell was broken as she blushed and came back to herself.  Spike startled and stopped what he was doing to ask her, “Does that mean you’re ready for breakfast, Slayer?”

“I guess it does,” she admitted somewhat embarrassed by her body’s demands.

“Breakfast it is, then,” he said cheerfully as he stood back up and pulled her to her feet.  “Ready, Slayer?”

Pulling Buffy to her feet left them standing only a few inches apart, with Spike still holding the hands he used to pull her up.  Buffy could feel the heat flooding her face and body as she stood there, swaying slightly and waiting for him to pick her up.  She looked away from his penetrating eyes and held herself stiffly.  Memories of what happened the last time they stood that close together crowded her mind and sent her pulse rate skyrocketing.  She tried to ignore the warm feeling his nearness was creating, and she fought off the shivers that were her body’s reaction to being held in his powerful arms.

(Oh my god.  How are we going to do this?  How are we going to get through the next couple days when we can’t even stand close together without....)

When Spike felt the stiff and unyielding body he was carrying, he forced himself to hold it as far away from his own as possible.  He resisted the urge to bury his nose in her hair; instead walking carefully down the stairs without looking at or speaking to her.  When they reached the kitchen, he set her down easily on a stool so that her immobile leg would have room to stretch out and he moved away from her quickly.

He tried to ignore the ache in his chest when she continued to refuse to meet his eyes.  The whole time he was fixing her cereal, getting her juice and fruit, she remained sitting stiffly on the stool, only looking at him when she had to.  She ate in silence while Spike warmed up his blood and drank it with her.  To an outside observer, it would have looked like any young couple having their coffee and cereal together in the morning.  But the tension in the room was so thick the air was almost vibrating.

When the uncomfortable meal was over, Spike put the dishes in the sink to wash later and stood up.  When he held out his arms, Buffy’s eyes flew to his face in a panic. The vampire bit his lip and growled out,  “Sod it all, Slayer.  I made you a promise and I’ll bloody well keep it! Stop actin’ like you’re trapped with a serial rapist and relax, will you?”

He picked her up before she could answer him and carried her quickly to the living room.  He placed her carefully on the couch and pulled the blanket up around her before he said anything else.  When she still couldn’t look at him, he sighed and sat back on his heels in front of her.

“Slayer,” he said quietly.  She shot a quick look at him, then her eyes went back down to the floor.  “Buffy,” his voice shook slightly,  “Look at me, love, please?”

Reluctantly, she raised her eyes to look into his and flinched at the hurt she saw in there. 

“Buffy,” he began,  “I keep my word, love.  I promised not to push the issue and I meant it.  I’m not going to...to take advantage of you when you’re vulnerable.  I would never do anything to hurt you, Buffy. “ His eyes pleaded with her to believe him.   “Don’t be afraid of me, pet.  Please?”

“I’m...I’m not afraid of you,” she said, forcing herself to look him in the eye.  “It’s not you I’m afraid of.”

(It’s me, and the way you make me feel. The things you make me want to do.)

As though he could read her thoughts, Spike relaxed and stood up, regaining his usually cocky demeanor.

“Then I’ll do my best not to be so irresistible, Slayer.”  He laughed at her eyeroll as he went back toward the kitchen to clean up the breakfast dishes. Suddenly the tension was gone and they were comfortable with each other again.  They spent the rest of the afternoon watching Passions and playing cards, indulging in their usual snarky banter.

Chapter Two

Since Buffy wasn’t able to leave home, the Scoobies meetings were being held in her living room.  The first to arrive later that evening was Giles.  The Watcher raised an eyebrow when he found the vampire sitting comfortably in the easy chair, sipping blood from a cup that looked very familiar to the librarian. 

“ I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m glad you’re here, Spike.  I would like to speak with you. If I could?”  He gestured toward the kitchen with his head.

“What could you have to say to Spike that I can’t hear?” Buffy asked in an offended tone of voice.  She glared at the vampire as though he was responsible for trying to hide something from her.  Spike just shrugged and looked at the Watcher curiously.

Giles took his glasses off and pinched the bridge of his nose before beginning, “Riley came by the shop today to tell me that he thought Spike was working a thrall over you and he wanted me to know that he was planning to—“ He stopped as the other Brit jumped to his feet and interrupted him.

“Already got the memo, Watcher.  No need to bother the Slayer with it. “ He looked hard at the older man, willing him to do what he was asking.

“Then you know he—“

“Yep, all taken care of”

“Oh, well, good then,”

Buffy stared back and forth between the two men, knowing she was missing something in the conversation but reluctant to admit it.

“So, is that like a British thing?  This whole talking without actually saying anything?”

“We understood each other, Slayer,” Spike said with another meaningful glance at her Watcher.

Buffy forgot to pursue the cryptic conversation between her Watcher and her temporary nurse as the other Scoobies trickled in and greeted her.

“Whoa, Buffster, You must be feeling better – you’re all clean and shiny.”

Xander’s praise for her looks just reminded her of how much she’d allowed herself to wallow in self-pity until Spike came over and she shot him a grateful look before saying, “Yeah.  Somebody pointed out to me that I was turning into messy, stinky Buffy. So we fixed it.”

She could see Willow’s eyes grow big as she took in Spike’s presence and the absence of Dawn and Joyce, but her friend didn’t say anything.  Willow knew Xander’s ability to deny what he didn’t want to know about Buffy would prevent him from making the connection between Spike’s presence and Buffy’s clean clothes and hair. 

Just as they had all settled down with soft drinks and chips to begin going over what little Giles had been able to learn from the books they recovered as well as his inquiries to the Council, there was a knock on the front door.  Surprised glances were exchanged as they looked around and saw no one missing. 

As Xander went to answer the door, Giles gestured toward the kitchen with his head and Spike reluctantly moved to where he couldn’t be seen from the front door.   The door opened to reveal an agitated Riley standing outside.  He shouldered his way past Xander and strode into the living room. 

“And, hello to you, too, Riley,” the young brunette snarked as he followed the soldier back into the room.

Riley flashed him an apologetic look, but focused on Buffy.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were having a meeting tonight?  I wouldn’t have known anything about it if I hadn’t seen Willow and Tara walking this way.”

Buffy stared back at him, her brain working frantically.  She realized that not only had she not thought to invite Riley to the Scoobie meeting, she hadn’t even thought about him at all the whole day.  Guilt made her stammer and try to apologize for excluding him, even though she knew no one else in the room considered him a part of their Scoobie gang.

“I....I’m sorry, Riley.  I guess I just got busy doing....stuff, and I probably just figured you’d be by tonight anyway.”  She brightened up at that thought.  “Yes, that’s it.  I just assumed you’d be here tonight, so I didn’t bother to call you.”

Pleased with how she’d handled the situation, she sat back on her pillows and beamed at him.

He hesitated a few seconds as though he knew she’d made it up on the spot, but then relaxed and went over to sit by her on the couch.  A soft growl from the kitchen made him look up and he turned an interesting shade of purple when he saw Spike glaring at him from the doorway.

“What the hell is HE doing here?” he shouted at Buffy as he leapt to his feet.  “I distinctly told you to get rid of him.  Didn’t you listen to a word I said?”  He glared back and forth between Spike and Buffy completely missing the surprised looks on her friends’ faces.

He also, unfortunately for him, missed the thoroughly pissed off look on the Slayer’s face as he upbraided her for not following his instructions.

“I thought I made it pretty clear that I would do whatever was best for me and my family, regardless of what you ‘TOLD’ me to do.” 

She glared back at her angry boyfriend, emphasizing his words.   She struggled to contain her amazed outrage that he actually expected her to do what he said just because he said it.  She remembered the phone conversation yesterday and his casual dismissal of her calling, as well as his jealousy over the time she spent on it.

  “Spike is the only one other than me strong enough to protect us from Glory.  He and Willow are my best weapons at the moment.  At least until I get back on my feet.  These people are my support system and my back-up.  I am NOT one of your ‘men’ to be ordered about and I WILL make my own decisions about who is welcome in my house.  Get used to it or get out.”

She blew out an exasperated breath and, fixing him with a steely green eye, waited to see what he would do.  Riley looked around the room and saw little or no sympathy on the faces of the people Buffy referred to as her support system.  The vampire, of course, was openly contemptuous, but he was surprised to see that her Watcher was also nodding approvingly.

His sense that he knew much less than he thought he did about his girl and her life became overwhelming and he sank back onto the couch cushions shaking his head at himself.   Buffy continued to glare at him for a time, then shook herself and turned back to her Watcher.

“So, Giles.  Did the Council have any information on Glory.  Who or what she is?”

“They are looking into it.  At this point all we know for sure is that she is looking for the missing “key” and that it had been under the protection of the monks until she located them and killed them all.  They will contact me as soon as they have ascertained what the key is, and what it is to be used for.  In the meantime, we must assume she will continue to pursue you and everyone associated with you in an attempt to find out where it is.”

“Speaking of—“ Xander was stopped by Willow’s hand gripping his leg very hard.  “Ow! Will. What was that for?”

His best friend shook her head slightly and rolled her eyes toward Riley, reminding Xander that the ex-commando was not in on the secret about Dawn’s origin. There was an uncomfortable silence as Xander tried to recover without giving too much away.  He decided to continue his line of thought and hope Riley didn’t make the connection between what he’d started to say and his actual words.

“Sorry. Change of subject.  Buffy, where’s Dawn?  Shouldn’t she be home from school by now?”

“She’s staying at Janice’s for a couple of days.  Apparently she would rather I yell at Spike when I get bored than at her,” Buffy said ruefully with an embarrassed shrug.

“She’ll be around tomorrow,” the vampire said quietly, with a wink at the Watcher.  “She’s coming to my crypt after school so I can help her with her history homework.  I have some old books I told her she could look into.  I’ll run to the crypt and meet her there tomorrow afternoon then walk her home when we’re finished.”

“What!” Riley shot upright, forgetting that he was trying to keep a low profile until Buffy calmed down.  “Buffy! You can’t let her go to his crypt!”

Buffy stared at him in surprise.  “Why not?  Surely you’re not going to argue that she’s not safe there?  That’s where I send her and my mom when I can’t be with them.  Gl-no one will be looking for her in a crypt.”

“Yeah, GI Joe,” the vampire drawled with a smirk.  “Why can’t the Niblet go to my crypt?  She knows the way, and she knows how to open the door.  She’ll just go on in, find the books and wait for me—“

“No!”  The outburst from the larger man surprised everyone except Spike and the Watcher.  Riley looked at Giles for support, but the older man was busy shuffling through the papers on his lap and refused to look up.

“Giles,” the man said meaningfully.  “Help me convince Buffy that Dawn shouldn’t go there.”

Giles looked up as though he had just realized what Spike had said and frowned nervously.  “Oh dear.  Yes, I had almost forgotten.” He turned to Buffy with an innocent look and said, “I believe Riley is right, Buffy.  It would be best if Dawn not go to Spike’s abode just yet.  Perhaps in a few days?”  He looked at Riley inquiringly.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Buffy’s normal lack of patience was being sorely tested at Giles and Spike’s obvious knowledge of something pertaining to Dawn – or to Spike’s crypt, she suddenly realized.

Turning to her boyfriend, she asked in a deceptively calm tone, “Tell me, Riley,  Why would it be bad for Dawn to go to Spike’s crypt right now?  Is there a reason why you think it’s not safe?”  She looked at him with wide, innocent eyes as though she was expecting a real answer.

When he just stood there looking uncomfortable, Spike couldn’t resist another dig.  “Yeah, tell us, there, Capt’n.  Is there some reason Dawn wouldn’t be safe if she tried to go into my crypt?  Maybe one of the witches could come with her, if you think it’s too dangerous.  One of them could go in first...you know, just to be sure it was safe?”

The furious man turned toward the vampire, his face twisted with anger and hate.

“Your crypt is no place for Buffy’s mother and sister, or for Buffy or any of her friends.  And....and...it could be dangerous.” He looked at Giles for help, but the Watcher just stared blandly back at him.

“Why is that, Riley?” Buffy’s tone was still calm, but there was a distinct Slayer edge to it.  “Why are you so sure Spike’s crypt would be dangerous for Dawn?  And why do you think Giles should agree with you?  And why,” she whirled to glare at the vampire trying his best to look innocent, “are YOU trying so hard to make him say why it’s dangerous?”

She glared back and forth between the three men, frustrated because she couldn’t cross her arms angrily or tap her foot.  She settled for putting her one bendable arm on her hip and holding the immobile one out at her side.

Spike slipped out of the room into the kitchen, unwilling to be the one who told Buffy what Riley had done to his crypt.  He wanted the man to admit what he’d done, but he also wanted him to realize how close he might have come to killing or injuring Dawn or one of the Scoobies.  When he stopped to think about what could have happened to someone Buffy cared about if he hadn’t happened to catch them in the act, his normally room temperature blood ran cold. 

(Bloody bastard!  It’s one thing for him to try to kill me, but to risk the Niblet....If I didn’t have this chip, I’d rip his entrails out and wrap them around his throat.)

Meanwhile, in the living room, Riley now had everyone’s attention as they waited for him to answer Buffy’s question.  Standing up straight and looking at Giles accusingly, he said,  “Apparently it would be safe for anyone to walk in there.... now.”

The Watcher looked back at him and said mildly, “I didn’t tell him.  He already knew.  I guess it didn’t work as well as you’d hoped.”

When the soldier continued to glare at him, Giles let a trace of the Ripper enter his voice as he added,  “For which you should be very grateful.  It well could have been Dawn, or any one of us.”

The sound of the coffee table being kicked across the room brought everyone’s attention back to the thoroughly angry Slayer.  The force of the kick caused her to lose her balance when she put her weight on the leg with the cast and she fell back onto the couch, spoiling the effect somewhat.  But there was no mistaking the tone of her voice or the look in her eye.

“Someone, and I don’t care who, is going to tell me right now what all this mysterious talking about things without actually saying anything is all about,” she ground out very slowly.

“I believe that would be your job, Agent Finn,” Giles said as he got up and joined Spike in the kitchen. The rest of the group looked back and forth between Buffy and Riley with puzzled frowns.

Riley took a deep breath and looked at Buffy.  He was surprised to find himself cringing away from the tiny, temporarily crippled woman glaring at him from the couch. Clutching his righteous indignation around him like a protective cloak, he said firmly, “I thought Spike was working a thrall on you that you would let him touch you and stay in your house, so I was going to make sure he left town.  When we couldn’t find him at home, we set up a booby trap at the entrance to his crypt.  It was just meant to run him off.  I knew you wouldn’t let me stake him, so we decided to scare him away.” He paused for a second. “In hindsight, it wasn’t a very good idea, I guess.”

“You GUESS?”

Her boyfriend shuffled his feet and looked at the rug intently.

“I didn’t think about the possibility of anyone else coming in the door before he did.  I’m sorry, Buffy.  It just made me crazy to think about him being here with you all the time.  I don’t like it.”

“Get out,” she said without inflection.

“Buf—“

“Get out now, Riley.  When I’ve calmed down enough to talk about this, I’ll call you.  Right now I have a skanky bitch with superpowers to worry about and I need to finish my meeting with my friends.  ALL of my friends.”

“And that doesn’t include me?”

“Not at the moment it doesn’t.  Maybe when I get over the idea that your jealousy might have cost my sister her life, it will.  But not right now.”

His shoulders slumped as Riley nodded his head in resignation and walked toward the door.  Before he had even pulled it shut behind him, Buffy had already turned away from him and said, “Now, where were we?”

“Pretty much nowhere, Buffy,” Willow admitted.  “Until we know more about Glory and what she wants the key for, we won’t have much idea of how to fight her.”

“I’m afraid Willow is correct, Buffy.  I will contact the Council again and push them to dig a little deeper, but until we have more information on Glory, we will just have to try to stay away from her.” Giles and Spike had come back into the living room when they heard the door shut behind her boyfriend.

“Wonderful,” Buffy grumbled.  “Maybe she’ll take a vacation or something until I’m back on my feet.”

“Speaking of that, how do you feel?  When do you think you will be ready to start training again?”

“Well, my ribs are all healed,” she avoided looking at Spike as she said that, knowing she would turn red all over if she did.  “I’m guessing the arm and leg will be strong enough to get rid of the casts in a day or so.  Then I’ll just have to see how strong I feel.  Maybe by the end of the week?” she looked at her Watcher hopefully.

“Whenever you feel ready, Buffy.  I don’t want to rush you and create more problems, but we will all breathe a little easier when you are back in top form.”

With nothing left to talk about, except Buffy’s explosion at Riley, which no one wanted to discuss in front of her, the meeting soon broke up and Buffy said good night to her friends.  Giles was the last one to leave, and he paused before he went out the door.

Looking back and forth between Spike and Buffy, he cleared his throat several times before finally saying, “I would be the first one to admit that Riley should not have tried to tell you what to do, nor should he have taken matters into his own hands in such a dangerous fashion.  However,” he gave the vampire a long look, “it is fairly obvious that he is not totally wrong to be concerned about the amount of time Spike is spending with you and I think in all fairness to him, you need to acknowledge that, Buffy.”

Buffy’s face went completely white as she stammered, “Wha- what are you talking about, Giles?  Spike is just extra muscle.  Muscle that I need right now.”

If the Watcher had had any doubt that things between his Slayer and the vampire were not as platonic as he would have liked, the expression on her face would have banished them immediately.

He took his glasses off, cleaned and replaced them before he answered her.  “It is quite apparent that Spike’s interest in your...well-being is more than that of a comrade in arms.  I can see it, your family and friends see it—“ He was interrupted by a snort from the vampire.

“If the whelp had any idea how I feel about her, I’d have stakes stickin’ out all over my body.”

“Yes, well, with the possible exception of the willingly oblivious Xander, that is.  My point is, the more Buffy defends you and the longer you are in this house, the more Riley has to be angry about.  At this point, I would prefer we not have to worry about the actions of a jealous boyfriend when we are dealing with a powerful enemy.”

Buffy’s lower lip jutted out stubbornly.  “This is the first time in a week that I’ve been able to sleep in my own bed and take a shower or wash my hair.  Spike is staying until I get these casts off, and that’s that.  Riley will just have to deal.”

“I’m not suggested you do without Spike’s .....assistance if and when you need it. I am suggesting that you understand Riley’s reluctance to having his girl friend spending so much time in the company of another man who clearly has feelings for her.”

“He can be as reluctant as he wants,” Buffy grumbled, “but he is NOT going to be giving me orders  - about Spike or anything else!”  She attempted to stomp her foot for emphasis, and ended up falling back onto the couch again.

“Yes, well, no doubt he is rapidly finding that you do not follow orders very well,” her Watcher said with a grimace.  “And if not, I would be most happy to educate him on that subject.”  He pulled the door open and started out the door, ignoring her indignant, “Hey!”

“Good night, Buffy, Spike.”



When the door closed behind the Watcher, Buffy threw herself back against the couch and groaned.

“Life wasn’t difficult enough – now I’ve got to worry about Riley going berserk and staking you.  I don’t have time for this!”

Spike came over and sat down near, but not touching her.

“The Watcher’s right, love.  It doesn’t make sense to antagonize him. The wanker’s little trick with the cross bow could have killed or injured Dawn or anyone else who came in there.”

Buffy stared at him in amazement.  “Excuse me?  Who are you and what have done with Spike?  You know, William the Bloody? Vampire?  Lives to annoy people and make their lives miserable?” 

“Oh, I’m planning to make him just as miserable as I can,” he grinned at her.  “But what set him off this time was you defending me to him yesterday and it could have got somebody hurt.  Somebody you DO care about,” he added so softly she almost didn’t hear him.

She couldn’t figure out what to do or say about his last statement, so she chose to ignore it.

“He is NOT going to tell me what to do!”

“I think he’s startin’ to get that, pet.  You just let me worry about defending myself and I’ll try not to give him any more reasons to be jealous.  Not that I’m goin’ anywhere until you’re all better,” he added hastily.  “But I’ll keep out of sight when he’s around and you can promise not to rub it in his face that I’m takin’ care of you.”

She looked at his downcast face and surprised herself by taking his cool hand in her own warm ones.

“If he knew what you...we...did... he’d kill you.   You know that, right?”

The vampire raised his eyes to her face, surprised that she was willing to talk about what he stubbornly insisted to himself was the love-making they had indulged in the day before.  When he saw the worry on her face, his heart lurched and he felt a warmth in his chest.  He reached his other hand up to her cheek and gently stroked it.

“Nobody except us knows about that, love.  And nobody will.  I already promised you there’d be no repeatin’ until we get rid of that Glory bint.  Not gonna give the soldier any reason to dust me.  Not as long as you need me to help you protect the Niblet, anyway. Can’t help how I feel about you.  And, accordin’ to the Watcher, I’m not real good at hidin’ it; but I’ll do my best to keep a low profile when I need to until we get this sorted out.”

“I’m not giving you up just because he’s a dumbass,” she muttered, trying not to lean into the cool hand still stroking her cheek.  “He’s got no reason to...” Her voice trailed off as she remembered that her behavior the day before would have given him every reason to worry about Spike’s presence in her house if he’d known about it.

She met Spike’s amused expression as he raised his eyebrow skeptically and she blushed all over.  She dropped his hands quickly and pulled back from him.  She tried to ignore the twinge of regret she felt when his hand was no longer touching her cheek.

“Well, he doesn’t know about that little....mistake...yesterday, so he’s just being stupid!”  She chose not to see how Spike flinched when she called what they did a mistake.

(It WAS a mistake.  It had to be.  I can’t get involved with another vampire. Especially one without a soul.  One that thinks he loves me, that protects my family, that watches my back, that is a great kisser....gah!  Don’t think about the kissing, or the—No! Not thinking about that.  It never happened.  Just a daydream.  That’s all it was.  A very real, very sexy, daydream. )

Spike’s face had closed down when she pulled back and went into her internal denial dialogue.  He had to fight the urge to grab her and kiss her until she was no longer able to deny the attraction between them, but his inner William insisted that he keep his promise not to push the issue.

(She’s gonna need me to help with this hell-bitch.  I can’t afford to do anything that would make her want to push me away.  Got to let her know that she can count on me without worryin’ I’m gonna be tryin’ to seduce her.  I don’t want her to be afraid to be around me.)

“You’ll work it out, Slayer,” he said flatly as he moved away from her on the couch.  “Soon’s you get those casts off and don’t need me anymore, I’ll disappear for a while and you two can kiss and make up.”

Buffy’s eyes flew to his and he couldn’t help being warmed by the fear on her face.  “Disappear?  Where will you go?  What if I need you?”

“Don’t worry, love,” he closed his eyes and tried to shake off the mental image of Riley kissing her.  “I won’t really be gone anywhere. I just won’t be around where your boy friend can see me and get his knickers in a twist.  You’ll be able to find me if...when you need me.”

“Oh, okay then,” she said dubiously. “I guess that will work.  Mom should be back tomorrow and maybe you can just bring me up and down stairs and then go down to the basement or back to your crypt to sleep during the day.”

She looked at him hesitantly and offered, “We can ask Willow to put some protection wards around your crypt to keep Riley out.  Just in case....”

“I’ll be all right, pet.  Don’t worry yourself about it.  Big Bad here, remember?”

(I’m trying to remember that, Spike.  I’m really trying, but you keep making it harder and harder.)

Aloud, she said,  “Yeah, I remember.  You just need to remember that chip makes you a little less bad than you used to be.  And a lot more vulnerable,” she added with a nervous smile.

“Worried about me, Slayer?” he asked, doing his best to sound sarcastic rather than hopeful.

“Hah! That’ll be the day when I worry about an annoying, fashion-challenged, Billy Idol wannabe.”  She tossed her head and smiled to take the sting out of her words. “Now, carry me upstairs, please. I have important healing to do.”

“That you do, love.  The sooner the better.” He said as he scooped her up and headed for the stairs.  “If I get caught playing nursemaid to the Slayer, I’ll have to kill the entire demon population of Sunnydale just to save my reputation.”

“You don’t have any reputation to save,” she snarked at him.

“Watch it, Missy.  I might ‘accidentally’ drop you all way down these stairs.”

She giggled and wriggled as best she could with her immobilized limbs.  He smiled down at her and pretended to let go, then caught her before she could hit the floor and clutched her against his body tightly.

“No, you won’t,” she said softly, relaxing into his chest.  “I know you won’t let me fall.”

“No, Slayer,” he whispered into her hair.  “I won’t let you fall.  I’ll never let you fall.”

***************


When they reached the second floor, Spike repeated the routine of the night before, depositing her in the bathroom and coming back for her when she called for him.

He put her on the bed, then stood up quickly and moved toward the door.

“I’ll just let you go to sleep now, Slayer.  Give you a chance to knit those bones up and get back on your feet.” 

( Give me a chance to get away from your scent, the feel of your skin, those things that are making me so hard I’m not going to be able to walk in a minute.)

Buffy looked slightly disappointed, but burrowed under the covers and yawned as she said, “Yep. That’s what I’m gonna do.  Get to sleep and get my bones better.  Lots of sleep.”

She looked up at him with her hair spread around her head like a golden veil and her eyes searching his face as though there was some secret hidden there.  “Spike?” she asked softly.  “Why are you so different from other vampires?”

“Dunno, love.  Always have been – in spite of Angelus’ and Darla’s best attempts to cure me.” He grinned at her and blew her a kiss as he went out the door.  “Good night, Slayer.  Sleep tight.”

(I love you.)

“Good night, Spike.  Don’t do anything to get yourself staked.”

(Don’t leave me.  I’m not ready for you to leave me.)



Chapter Three

At Buffy’s insistence, as soon as Joyce returned from her trip she took Buffy in for X rays of her broken arm and leg.  The doctor made no comment as he checked her well-healed ribs and looked at the X rays of the broken bones that also seemed to be healed.  He looked inquiringly at Joyce and Buffy to see if they were going to volunteer any information as to how bones managed to knit themselves together in less than 2 weeks, but he was greeting with identical innocent looking “dumb blond” smiles and gave it up with a sigh.

“All right, Ms. Summers.  I’ll cut those casts off right now and you can begin physical therapy tomo-“

“That’s all right,” Buffy interrupted him.  “I, uh, I have my own...uh...trainer to help me get strong and flexible again.  Just get my casts off, please.”

Shaking his head at her stubbornness, he agreed, saying, “Well, since you’ve only been in the casts a couple of weeks, you probably haven’t lost that much mobility anyway.  I guess you’ll be fine.”

“Oh I will be!” Buffy assured him with her best cheerleader smile.

She had her mother drop her at the Magic Box on the way back from the doctor’s so that she could let Giles know how much better she was.  She was amazed to see that the shop seemed full of customers.  A closer look showed her some familiar faces and she frowned when she realized she was looking at a delegation from the Watcher’s Council.

“Well, this can’t be good,” she muttered as she came the rest of the way into the shop.

“Ah, Ms Summers,” one of the tweed-clad men said with pseudo cheerfulness. “How good to see you again!”

Buffy was sure she was supposed to know his name, but drew a complete blank and looked at Giles for assistance.

“Yeah, likewise, I’m sure.  What do you guys want now?  Am I in trouble again?”

“You might say that, Ms. Summers,” the first man glared at her, deploring her lack of manners.  “We are here to discuss Glory and your possible lines of defense.”

“Oh!” Buffy was suddenly much more cordial.  “Well, what did you find out about her?  How do I kill her?”

There was a certain amount of throat clearing and feet shuffling among the group until Buffy’s obviously growing impatience forced a reply.

“She is a god,” one of them said flatly. “We don’t know how you kill her.  We’re not sure it can be done.”

“Excuse me?  She’s a what?  Please tell me you meant to say ‘a dog’ and just mixed up your consonants.”

“I’m afraid not,” a dark young man with a bookish look to him stepped forward.  “She is very old and from a race of hell-gods.  She is looking for a mystical key that can be used to open a portal and release her to return to her hell dimension.  Unfortunately, opening the portal will also permit things from that hell dimension to enter our world.  Very unpleasant things,” he added unnecessarily.

“And she needs this...key...to do this?”

“Uh, yes. She requires the key, which, for some reason she seems to think you are protecting.....” he paused to allow Buffy to enlighten them, but when she didn’t he went on, “And she only has until the end of this month to use it.  After that, it will be another thousand years before the portals will be lined up again.”

“So,” Buffy thought out loud,  “All we have to do is keep her from finding the key till the end of the month, and then we’re home free, right?”  She fixed them with a lethal glare.  “Or is there more?”

“Well, only that she will undoubtedly be extremely angry if she doesn’t get back to her home...”

“We’ve already had the pleasure of seeing her lose her temper, thank you very much.  I’d rather kill her.”

“Yes, quite. Well, we will continue to look into that possibility....” His voice trailed off as he melted back into the crowd of tweed jackets.

“Do you have a plan, Ms. Summers?” one of the interchangeable watchers inquired.

“Hide the key, kill anything that tries to get near...it, and find a way to kill the skank.  That’s pretty much it.”  Buffy stuck her lower lip out and dared them to challenge her plan.

“And how do you intend to do this,” the first watcher insisted on knowing.

“I’m not quite sure,” Buffy admitted.  “But we’ll come up with something,” she brightened.

“WE?”

Buffy rolled her eyes at the startled group.  “Yes, WE.  I have two very powerful witches here, an experienced Watcher, and....and....some other help,” she finished more quietly.

“Would that other help consist of a vampire that is unable to kill humans?” one of the men inquired with a frown.

“It might,” she muttered, unsure of their reaction to Spike’s being part of the plan.

“Is that wise, Ms. Summers?” the darker man inquired.  “After all, even if he is harmless, he is a vampire....he could still provide the hellgod with information—“

“Spike would never do that!  He loves D—“ she swallowed hard as she realized how close she had come to revealing Dawn’s secret.

“I don’t think he would do that,” she continued firmly.  “If for no other reason, than he’s just too stubborn to give her what she wants.  I trust him.”  As she said that, she realized with shock that it was true.  She did trust Spike.  And had trusted him for months.

“Is this William the Bloody we’re speaking about?” the young watcher inquired angrily.  “The Slayer of Slayers?  You TRUST him?”

Out of the corner of her eye, Buffy saw a mousy looking, tweed-clad woman’s head coming flying up when she heard Spike’s name.  She looked at Buffy intently. “William the Bloody is still here? In Sunnydale?  Do you know where can I find him?” she asked eagerly.

Buffy looked the other woman in the eye and asked suspiciously, “Why would you want to?  He IS a vampire, as your buddies here have so kindly pointed out.”

“Oh, I know!  He’s one of the few master vampires left!  I did my thesis on him.  And...I met him when we were here last year for the...well, when we were here before.  But I didn’t have a chance to speak with him for very long.  I should so like a chance to sit down with him and hear about his life.”  At a raised eyebrow from Buffy, she amended, “Well, his unlife, I suppose would be more accurate.”

She looked at Buffy hopefully and asked,  “Will he be here later?   Do you think I will get to see him?”

Before Buffy could answer, a warm, deep voice came from the door to the training room.

“I’m right here, luv.  You can see me all you want. Or all of me you want,” he said with a leer.

The woman whirled to look at Spike, leaning against the door jamb with his thumbs in his belt loops, long fingers splayed along his hip bones.  He gave the watcher a smile that oozed sex and said,  “Haven’t we met before, luv?  Linda, was it?”

“Lydia,” she breathed as she remained frozen in place, unable to take her eyes off the lean, muscular blond and his penetrating blue eyes.

With a quick glance at Buffy, who was struggling to control an urge to backhand the female watcher all the way back to England, he took Lydia’s elbow gently and offered, “why don’t we step in here, pet, and you can ask me anything you want while the Slayer and your....colleagues....suss out what to do about that Glory bint.”

Mouth still hanging open and eyes still focused on his, Lydia allowed herself to be led into the training room by the charming vampire.  The other watchers stared after her, aghast that she would so willingly go unarmed into a room with one of the most dangerous vampires on the planet.  The only one that seemed at all willing to join her, was the openly gay Percy, who stared enviously after them as they disappeared behind the door.

“M-Ms Summers,” one of them stammered, “Is that at all safe?  Will Lydia be all right in there?”

“Oh, LYDIA is quite safe,” Buffy gritted through her teeth.

(But I know an annoying vampire who’s going to get his ass kicked!)

An hour later, just as Buffy was sure she couldn’t tolerate another “Well, perhaps... “ “It’s entirely possible...” “ We’ll need to research that...”, the group of Watchers finally admitted they had very little left to tell Buffy about Glory, aside from the fact that she appeared to be invulnerable.    As they prepared to leave, Percy hastened to the door of the training room to tell Lydia – and to get another look at Spike.  As he reached the door, the dark haired watcher asked Giles, “What is that room back there?”

“That is our training area,” he replied.  “Where we will begin getting Buffy back into shape now that she’s--“

“BACK into shape?” The question rang out sharply.

With a sigh, Giles explained to them about Buffy’s mishap with the boulders, including Spike’s contribution to getting her out safely.  They looked at her intently for several minutes, then demanded abruptly,  “We need to see her training.  We must know if she is not up to the task of—“

“I’m up to whatever is needed,” Buffy growled, having reached her limit of Council tolerance.  “But I’d be happy to go a few rounds with you if it would make you feel better.”

Flinching back from the obviously eager Slayer, he said, “No, not with me.  But we would like to see you spar with the vampire.  That should give us an idea of how recovered you are.  We also wish to see the chip in action, if you could arrange it.”

Buffy started to refuse, ready to point out that Spike could not possibly fight back without setting his chip off; and that she didn’t want to hurt him unnecessarily just so they could see the chip fire.  Before she could finish her remarks, the door opened and a giggling and flushed Lydia emerged, gazing adoringly at Spike who was leaning toward her and whispering in her ear.

“No problem!” Buffy exploded, grabbing Spike’s arm and throwing him back into the training room.  “Watch how well I can handle a vampire when I need to.”

Spike glared at her from where she’d thrown him on the floor, then kipped back to his feet and stood directly in front of her. 

“What the hell was that?” he demanded, leaning forward and meeting her furious eyes with his own gold-flecked glare.

“The council wants to see us fight,” Buffy ground out.  “So fight, vampire!”  With that, she threw a punch at his head that he barely dodged, only to follow it up with a leg sweep and a flurry of punches to his head and body.  He was able to deflect most of her strikes, but quickly realized that she was seriously trying to hurt him.  The council members watched, thunderstruck as the two lithe blonds flowed around the room.  The fight looked like a choreographed dance as the Slayer threw punches and kicks that the vampire anticipated and evaded as best he could.

Spike didn’t attempt to throw any punches, but he did block Buffy whenever he could.  They had sparred often enough that he had a pretty good idea what sort of defensive moves he could make without triggering the chip.   However, her obviously very real anger was making it more and more difficult for him to counter her attack.

When one of her punches slipped past his defense and bloodied his nose, he vamped out and rushed her, taking her to the floor.  Before any of the horrified watchers could react, he screamed and rolled off clutching his head and moaning.  Buffy stayed on the floor, shame beginning to work its way through the angry haze that had filled her when she saw Spike flirting with the besotted watcher.

As she reached a tentative hand toward the moaning vampire, Giles began ushering the curious watchers out the door, telling them he was sure they’d seen enough to know that Buffy was in fighting shape, and that the vampire was harmless.

Lydia lingered in the doorway, looking very much as though she’d like to comfort the injured vampire; but one look at Buffy’s narrowed eyes and she squeaked and ran out.

When the room was empty and the door closed, Buffy edged her way closer to the immobile vampire and muttered,  “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t answer, just rolled his head to the side and looked at her coldly.

Buffy looked away from his angry face and began picking at some lint on her pants.  As her breathing returned to normal and the adrenaline that had been fueling her furious attack on him left her body, she began to realize that she had really overworked her unstretched muscles and joints.  She rubbed absently at her calves and thighs, until her arms began to ache as much as her legs did.

After several minutes of trying to stretch and rub the aches out herself, she heard Spike give an exasperated sigh and he pulled her roughly over to where he was now sitting up.

“Come’ere you silly bint.  You should have known you couldn’t push yourself like that when you haven’t moved those muscles in weeks.”

As he grumbled at her, he began to knead the muscles in her arms and legs, working the tightness out one muscle at a time.  Buffy stiffened at first when she felt his hands moving over her body, but she soon realized he was intent only on relieving the pain in her muscles and joints.  She relaxed then and closed her eyes, allowing his cool hands to soothe the aches and stiffness from her body.  Without realizing how she got there, she found herself lying on the mats while Spike continued to knead her muscles until she felt like a melting pool of jello.

As the tightness left her body and it was no longer necessary for the vampire to knead and rub, his touch turned to gentle stroking and his hands began to move into areas not stressed by the fight.  Buffy felt his cool fingers sliding over her sides and up her shoulders and into her hair.  She was enjoying the sensations he was creating as he gently ran his hands through her silky hair and along her arms.  Her breathing became faster and she felt her pulse speed up as his touch became even softer and more like a caress.

She rolled over slowly and looked up at him with half-closed eyes.

“Feels good,” she whispered as his hands slid around to the front of her arms and brushed the outside of her breasts.

She could feel his hands beginning to tremble as he fought to maintain the distance he had promised her.  He abruptly pulled them away from her body and sat up straighter.

“Good,” he rasped.  “I’m glad it feels better.  Can’t have the Slayer all achy and...tight...”  He caught his breath as she reached a hand out and gently touched his thigh.

“I really am sorry, Spike.  I was just...” she stopped, not sure what she was about to say.

“You were just jealous,” he smirked at her.

“As if!  Full of yourself much?  I was just sick and tired of listening to those morons drone on and on about nothing and...and...I...” She stopped again, unable to keep up the pretense in the face of his skeptical eyebrows.

“What the hell were you doing in here with her for a hour?” she demanded. 

“I was softening her up to see if I could find out more about what they know,” he growled.  “Didn’t know you were gonna go soddin’ apeshit over it.”

“I did NOT go ‘apeshit’ over it!” she replied indignantly. “I might have been a little...concerned,” she said, adding more softly,  “You were in here for a really long time.”

“You don’t really think I’d do something...anything...with a silly bint like that with you right in the next room, do you?  Do you think I’d do that to you, Buffy?  Do you?” he asked anxiously, brushing her hair back.

“Well, I don’t know. You ARE evil and I don’t know what kind of boyfriend you are.   Not that you’re my boy friend!” she hastened to add as his face lit up only to close down again when she qualified her remark.

He shifted away from her slightly and said with a trace of pain in his voice, “That’s right, Slayer, I’m not.  You have a boy friend, as I recall.  Big, ugly fellow.  Thinks he’s the boss of you.  You remember.”

“Yes, I suppose I do,” she mumbled.  “Or I will when I decide to forgive him for trying to tell me what to do.”

“Tell you what, pet,” Spike said quietly.  “When you do forgive him?  And you’re all ready to kiss and make up?”

Buffy looked at him curiously, wondering where he was going with that thought.  He took her chin in his hand and forced her to meet his eyes.

“You think about how you felt seein’ me flirting with that mousy little watcher today, and you multiply that by about a hundred times.  That should give you some idea what I’m gonna be feeling when you go back to shaggin’ your soldier boy.”

He dropped her chin and turned away, throwing over his shoulder as he went toward the door.  “Come on, I’ll walk you home.  I promised Dawn I’d help her with her history again tonight.”

Buffy stayed sitting on the floor for several minutes thinking about what she would be doing to him when she got back together with Riley.  She groaned softly to herself.

(I didn’t ask him to fall in love with me.  It’s not my fault if the fact that I have a boyfriend hurts him.  It’s not my responsibility.  I never gave him any reason to.....)

A snarky voice in her head said quite clearly, “Oh yeah, you never gave him any reason to think there was anything between you but friendship.  What are a few kisses and orgasms between friends?  Why you give Xander blow jobs all the time, don’t you?  You put your tongue down his throat every chance you get. “

Telling her internal voice to “shut the hell up!” she got to her feet and followed Spike out of the Magic Box.

Chapter Four

Buffy spent the next several days doing what she knew she should have in the first place; bending and stretching her body several times a day until she felt comfortable that it would be OK for her to start training again.

True to his word, Spike stayed conspicuously away from her; only seeing Dawn at his crypt in the afternoons when she needed help with her school work.  If it was getting dark, he would walk her home and say a quick hello to Joyce, but he never asked about Buffy or looked for her.

The Slayer had gone back to the dorm and was busy trying to catch up on what she had missed of her classes while she was home recuperating.  It was becoming increasingly obvious that maintaining her status as a full time student and keeping up with her Slaying duties as well as worrying about Glory were all going to take up more time than she actually had.

And, to complicate things, her mother had started getting blinding headaches that had Buffy concerned about her.  She eventually convinced her mother that she had to see a doctor and was anxiously waiting to hear the diagnosis.  When she determined that she had spent enough time playing catch up with her school work, she left the campus and headed for Revello Drive.

(I’ll just check on Mom, then do a quick patrol before I come back to campus.  There hasn’t been much demon activity this week.  I hope that doesn’t mean they’re all hunkering down because of Glory.....)

Thinking about the hell-god reminded her that Dawn was only safe as long as no one let it slip that she was the mystical key that was object of Glory’s search.  She mentally ran through a list of who actually knew about it.  Buffy, her mom, Willow and Tara, Giles, Xander, Anya, and of course, Spike, who had been with Dawn when she made the frightening discovery of her origin in Giles’ journals.

Buffy decided she would approach the residential office and make arrangements to move out of the dorm and back to her mother’s house. 

(Not only will it be cheaper, but I won’t have to go running back and forth to check on Mom and Dawn.  I’ll just go to classes when I need to and then come back here before patrol.)

She arrived at her home to find her mother packing a small overnight bag, while Spike paced back and forth on the back porch, smoking one cigarette after another and Dawn ran back and forth nervously between them.

“What’s going on, Mom?” she asked as calmly as she could with her stomach turning over rapidly.

“Oh, Buffy, you’re here.  Good.  I hated to leave Dawn alone, although Spike did say he would stay with her until....”

“I’m here.  I’ll stay with Dawn.  Where are you going?  Why are you packing?”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, dear.  You know how doctors are.  He just wants me to come in to the hospital so they can run some tests and confirm that it’s nothing.”

“It’s such a nothing that he wants you to come in tonight?” Buffy’s voice held all the disbelief she could muster.

Her mother stopped packing and sighed.  “There’s a slight chance that it is...something.  And if so, they want to know right away so that they can begin treatment.  But, I’m sure it’s going to be fine,” she finished brightly and resumed her packing.

“Spike can drive you to the hospital,” Buffy said suddenly.  “We’ll all come with you.”

“Buffy, they aren’t going to know anything tonight, I’m sure.  You and Dawn stay here and get a good night’s sleep and I’ll call you in the morning.  I think I will ask Spike to drive me, though.  The drugs the doctor gave me for the pain are making me really loopy.”  Her mother giggled slightly and Buffy was reminded of band-candy night and how her mother and Giles kept giggling at each other.  It occurred to her to wonder what exactly had been in those cigarettes that she kept taking away from them.

She shook her head to clear the irrelevant thought and went downstairs to tell Spike what she needed him to do.  They hadn’t seen each other since the night of the council’s visit and she wasn’t sure how he would react to her presence in the house again.

“She tell you?” he asked as she joined him on the porch.

“Yes, at least she told me as much as she’s willing to right now.”  Buffy wrapped her arms around herself, suddenly chilled as all the possibilities began to run through her mind.  “We’ll know more tomorrow, I guess.”

“It’ll be all right, love,” his warm voice rumbled near her ear and she looked up to meet his concerned expression.  She had to steel herself to stay where she was and not fall into the comfort she knew he was offering.

(Got to keep things business-like between us.  That’s the only way this will work. I can’t let him touch me, no matter how good it might feel.  I’ve got to stay strong.)

“Of course it will.  I know that.  I’m not worried,” she lied, knowing she wasn’t fooling either one of them.  “She wants you to drive her to the hospital.  Says she’s too ‘loopy’ to drive.  I think she means stoned,” she smiled up at him.  “You don’t mind, do you?”

“You know I don’t, Slayer.  I’ll just go start the car now.”  He turned to go back through the house, then paused and asked without turning to look at her, “Do you want me to report back?  Or should I just drop the car off and go home?”

“I’m not going to be able to sleep tonight,” Buffy sighed.  “Why don’t you come in when you get back and we’ll have some hot chocolate or something.”

He nodded his head, still without looking at her,  “OK, pet.  I’ll see you in a little while.”  He opened the door and went to get Joyce’s bag and put it in the car.  Buffy followed him into the house and went to the front door where her mother was putting on a coat.

“You’ll call as soon as you know anything, right?” she demanded.

“Yes, Buffy.  I’ll call you first thing in the morning before you go to class.  I’m sure it will turn out we’re all worrying for nothing.”

“Of course we are.  But you’ll get a nice rest in a comfy hospital bed tonight, and breakfast in bed in the morning.  So, kinda like a vacation, huh?”

“Yes, dear.  It’s just a short vacation and then I’ll be right back.”  She kissed Dawn quickly, hugged them both and went briskly out the door to the car.  The two sisters stood in the doorway, shoulders touching and watched until the taillights were out of sight.

“OK, missy.  It’s a school night, so off to bed with you.”  Buffy gave her sister a tight hug  and pushed her gently toward the stairs.

“She’s going to be alright, isn’t she?” Dawn asked in a tremulous voice.

“Of course, she is, Dawn.  She has to be.”  Buffy gave her sister what she hoped was an encouraging smile and waved her toward the stairs.  “Now go get some sleep. I’ll wake you in the morning.”


Buffy paced around the house, too restless to sit down and watch TV, and too afraid to leave Dawn alone to go on a quick patrol.  Eventually she found herself on the back porch, sitting on the steps and resting her head on her knees as she gave in to the anxiety churning inside her.

She was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the car pull up or notice that Spike was back until he sat down beside her and put his coat over her shoulders.

“Thanks,” she mumbled, not lifting her head, but leaning slightly toward him.

“It’ll be OK, love.” He offered the useless platitude again, not knowing what else to say. 

(Bloody hell, I want to make it be all right.  For her, for the Nibblet, for Joyce. Don’t know what these Summers women have done to me, but I can’t stand to see any of them unhappy or in pain.)

He could feel Buffy leaning in his direction, even though she hadn’t raised her head from her knees or moved her folded arms.  He wanted to hold and comfort her so badly his arms ached, but he didn’t want to offer something that wouldn’t be welcomed.

(Wonder where the soldier boy is tonight?  Surely they’ve kissed and made up by now.  Wonder if she called him while I was gone?)

When he heard a small sniffle from Buffy’s lowered head, and smelled the salty tang of tears, he couldn’t stand it any longer and he pulled her onto his lap.  Buffy buried her head in his chest immediately and allowed the sobs she’d been suppressing to come out. 

She cried for several minutes while he held her and murmured soothing words into the top of her head.  Eventually the sobs tapered off to sniffles and she picked her head up to rest it on his shoulder.

“Sorry about your shirt,” she sniffled.  “If you leave it here, I’ll wash it for you.”

“What, you don’t think I’d want to go home wearing Slayer snot all over me?” he teased gently.

Buffy was amazed when he produced a clean white handkerchief and handed it to her.  She stared back and forth from the handkerchief to his face, trying to comprehend that William the Bloody carried a clean handkerchief in his pocket.

“It’s a hanky, love.  You use it to wipe your eyes and nose.”  He smiled at her expression and waited for her to respond.

(She’s gob-smacked good and proper this time) he thought to himself with amusement as she continued to look at him as if he’d suddenly grown another head.

“I know what it is,” she muttered, finally wiping the remains of tears off her face and blowing her nose.  “I just can’t believe you had one.”

“Hey, properly raised Victorian gentleman here, pet.  Always have a clean hanky to lend a lady in need.”

“Guess I seemed pretty needy tonight, huh?” she said ruefully, ducking her head.

The vampire reached a hand to her face and tipped her chin up so that he could look at her.  He gently pushed an errant lock of hair back out of her eyes and said softly, “You’re worried about your mum, love.  No shame in that.  Even the Slayer can’t be supergirl all the time.  I’m just glad I was here.”

“I’m glad you were here, too,” she whispered, looking down again.  She was suddenly conscious of where she was sitting and that his arms were still wrapped around her.  She wanted nothing more than to remain wrapped in those cool, comforting arms until the sun came up, but she knew asking him to stay and hold her all night would be very unfair.

(Not to mention, probably impossible for either one of us.)

As though he could read her mind, Spike ducked his head and without looking at her offered, “I could stay, if you want, pet.  Just hold you till you fall asleep.” Not wanting to see the look of rejection he was sure was on her face, he continued to stare down at his boots until she nudged him to look up.

“I don’t think platonic cuddling in a bed is one of those things Buffy and Spike would be very good at.”  She blushed as she said it, but forced herself to meet his eyes so he would understand that she wasn’t rejecting the offer because it offended her.

“S’pose you’re right, love,” he agreed with a gentle smile.  “But I’d give it a try if you thought you needed me.”

(DO I need him?  Why is the idea of falling asleep next to him so appealing? Shouldn’t I be calling Riley right now for moral support?  Why would I rather have Spike here?  Must be because my mom and Dawn like him.)

“I...I’d like to try.  If you don’t mind.  Just until I fall asleep?  Then you can go do...whatever it is you do at night.”

(Probl’y not a good idea to tell her what I do at night is stand outside her house and listen to her heart beat while she sleeps.)

“I volunteered, pet. Remember?  I can do it.  Provided you keep those little hands to yourself, anyway.”  He grinned at her blush when she was reminded of how she could turn him on just by absently rubbing his bicep.

“MY hands will be just fine,” she grumbled at him as she stood up and reluctantly moved toward the house.  “You just watch yours mister.”

(And your lips, and your tongue, and.....gah! This is never going to work!)

Spike followed her into the house and up the stairs, stopping when he got to the top.

“I’ll just wait here, pet, until you tell me you’re ready.”

Remembering how he’d cared for her when she couldn’t do anything for herself, she started to laugh at his Victorian sense of propriety.  Then she remembered his “just wait till those casts are off...” and knew that he was just avoiding temptation. 

“K,” she said softly and slipped into the bathroom.  When she had finished in the bathroom and changed into her least sexy pajamas, she called softly and he was into the room before the words were all out of her mouth.

Buffy was in the bed, covers pulled up to her chin.  She had left space beside her for him to lie down, and was surprised when he pushed the pillow up against the headboard and leaned back on it.

“Come’ere, pet,” he said quietly and held out his arms.  He grinned at her when she slowly emerged from the cocoon she’d made in the blankets. 

“What’re you laughing at?” she demanded, as she curled up next to him.  “I don’t see anything funny about this.”

“You, love.  I’m laughing at you.  D’you really think flannel pajamas and a couple of blankets could make me forget what you look like naked?  I’m a vampire, pet, not just a man.  You fill all my senses.  Your scent is like ambrosia, the sound of your heartbeat makes mine almost beat in rhythm with it, the feel of your warm breath....” his voice trailed off as she looked like she was seriously rethinking the idea of having him in her bed.  “Point is, love, I appreciate your trying to make it easy on me, but you’re not gonna change the way I feel around you just by coverin’ up the goodies.”

“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea,” Buffy sighed, even as she snuggled into his side.  “It’s not fair to you, and—“

“I’ll be fine, Slayer.  This is about comfort and support, not sex.  I know that and I’ve got no intention of violating your trust by trying to take advantage of the situation.  Means too much to me, to know that you’re willin’ to lean on me.” He planted a light kiss on the top of her head.   “Told you last week – nobody ever died from a hard-on.   Not that I have one,” he hastened to add as Buffy cast a quick look toward his crotch.

Buffy realized she was actually quite tired, emotionally if not physically.  She put her head against his chest and wrapped one arm across his body.  With his body against hers, and his strong arms gently cradling her, she drifted back into the same comfortable feeling she’d had outside.  Soon, the only sound in the room was the soothing sound of the clock ticking off the seconds and the light swish of fabric as the vampire’s thumb moved slowly back and forth on the Slayer’s flannel covered arm.


When Buffy woke up in the morning, she wondered for a minute why the bed felt so empty.  She sat up with a start as she realized the sun was pouring in the window right onto the spot Spike had been in last night.  A quick search for dust or ashes, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

(I guess I can’t yell at him for leaving.  We said it would be just until I went to sleep,  And it’s not like he ran off after we had sex or anything.  He was a perfect gentleman.) 

She smothered the little stab of annoyance she felt at the idea that he had seemed to have no trouble being a perfect gentleman. 

(Hypocritical much, Buffy?  Tell him he can’t, then get mad cause he doesn’t? Way to be inconsistent-girl!)

She got up and knocked on Dawn’s door on her way to the bathroom. When she came out to allow Dawn in, she quickly dressed and went downstairs.   She looked at the phone for several minutes, then surrendered to the guilt she was feeling and called Riley’s number.  She tried to pretend she wasn’t relieved when he didn’t answer, and quickly left a short message saying that her mother was in the hospital and that she and Dawn would be going there soon.

With that out of the way, she called Giles and asked him if he could give them a ride to the hospital.  While she waited for him, she called the dorm and told Willow what was going on and asked her to tell Xander.

She was too tense to sit still, so while she was waiting for Dawn to come downstairs and for Giles to arrive, she paced around the house, wiping imaginary dust from all the flat surfaces.


Chapter Five

A short, tense ride later and she and Dawn were following a nurse into the room where her mother was propped up in bed, looking very worried.

“Mom?”  Buffy’s body was rigid as she waited for her mother to tell her everything was fine.  Instead, Joyce sighed and gestured for her daughters to come closer. With Dawn on one side and Buffy on the other, she put her arms around her two most precious possessions and hugged them tightly.

“It looks like I’m going to need a....procedure...tomorrow.” When she felt Buffy’s body stiffen, she quickly tried to soft-pedal the situation.  “There’s a small tumor on one side of my brain and that is what has been causing the headaches.  They’re going to take it out tomorrow, sew me back up, and I’ll be back on my feet in no time.”

“Is....is it...?” Dawn couldn’t finish the question that was hanging over all their heads.

“We won’t know until it’s out, Dawnie,” her mother said as she tried to comfort her youngest daughter.  “They’ll biopsy it right away and they tell me they’ll have an answer for us within a few hours.”

Buffy felt the adrenaline flooding her body and the urge to kill something was almost overwhelming.  She fought down the totally inappropriate response she was having to the situation, and tried to concentrate on what her mother was saying.

She nodded her head as her mother gave instructions for running the household for the next several days, and gave a start of surprise when the older woman asked, “Is Spike here?”

“No, Mom.  It’s 10:00 in the morning.  I’m sure he’s sound asleep in his crypt by now.”

“Oh,” her mother sounded vaguely disappointed.  “Well, you’ll just have to talk to him tonight then, “ she said firmly.

“Uh, okay.  Why?”

“I need to see him about the gallery.  He knows all about the shipments coming in this week and I was hoping he could unpack them one evening and get them out on the floor for me.  I’d ask you to do it, but you won’t know what to do with them, and you’ll be busy patrolling, and with school and Riley.....”

“I’ll ask him,” Buffy said shortly.  “Between the two of us, we’ll get it done. Don’t worry about it.”

She wasn’t sure if she was more surprised that her mother intended to rely on Spike, or that she obviously didn’t feel she could rely on her own daughter.  Not for the first time, she was reminded of how much her calling interfered with her relationships and her life.

(Even my mother knows I can’t have a normal life.  She doesn’t even expect it of me anymore.  I wonder why I do?)

Leaving Dawn to keep her mother company, she walked out into the waiting room to find it full of Scoobies all anxious to know what was going on.  She filled them in as best she could, relaxing a little as their obvious concern and sympathy helped to boost her spirits. 

The doctor came out and asked which one was Ms Summers. Buffy responded quickly, anxiously barraging him with questions.  The attractive young doctor smiled at the pretty blond and offered to explain what was going on over a cup of coffee.  He introduced himself as the resident assigned to her mom’s ward and asked her to call him Ben.

When Buffy came back from her lengthy coffee-cum-explanation time with Ben, she was surprised to find Riley waiting with Giles.  He immediately got up and swept her into a warm hug as he murmured a combined apology and offer of support.

He insisted on spending the rest of the day with her at the hospital, and offered to come with her on patrol that evening. She tried to discourage him from that as she knew she was going to have to find Spike to pass on her mother’s instructions.  However, in spite of the fact that his hovering was beginning to make her feel smothered, she was too embarrassed at having spent so much time with Spike recently to reject her anxious boyfriend.

She did mange to convince him that she would be better off patrolling on her own and having the opportunity to work out some of her fears in a physical way.  After  watching her wade into a large group of fledgling vampires and throw them all over the graveyard before she staked them all, he swallowed his pride and went to wait in his SUV.  There was something about the glee on her face as she punched and kicked her way through the crowd that made him slightly uncomfortable. 

It wasn’t the first time he’d come face to face with the fact that Buffy didn’t need his help to do her job; but it was one of the more emphatic lessons.

As Buffy got further into the cemetery, she felt the tingle on her neck that meant Spike was somewhere close by.  Sure enough, when she paused to look around, he stepped out of the shadows, hands in the pocket of his duster and a cigarette dangling from his mouth.

“Slayer,” he said pleasantly enough, but without the undercurrent of affection she was used to.  “A little hard on those poor fledglings, weren’t you, pet?  I thought you were gonna kill them all twice for a while there.”

She smiled at him tentatively and said, “I had some issues to work out.”

“Feel better now, then?”

“Oh, much.  Or as much as I can anyway,” she finished, her shoulders slumping as she remembered her mother.

“She’ll be fine, love,” he said firmly, once more seeming to read her mind.  “They’ll get it out and that’ll be it.  Say, do’ya suppose I could slip in there and get m’chip out at the same time?” 

“Don’t joke about that, Spike.” She snapped, then sighed and touched his face gently in apology.  “I’m sorry.  I guess I’m wound a little tight tonight.  How did you know about the...tumor?”

“I stopped off to see your mum.  She told me all about it and also about the gallery shipment.  I’ll go by there tomorrow evening and see what’s what.”

“Oh.  Thank you, Spike.  I can’t tell you how—“

“No need.  Got to take care of my girls, don’t I?” His soft look and shy smile suddenly vanished and in their place was the cold, immobile face of a corpse.  The only thing alive about it was the flashing in the amber colored eyes as Riley strode into the clearing.

“Buffy,” he called, not having seen the vampire. “You’ve done enough for one night.  Let’s get home and go to bed.  You’ll need to be up early tomorrow to be there before your mother goes in for her surgery.”

Buffy whirled back around just in time to see an expression of complete agony go across the vampire’s face.  She remembered what he’d said about multiplying her reaction to Lydia by a hundred and cringed at Riley’s words. Before she could say anything, he vanished as quickly and completely as only a master vampire could.

She looked around carefully, but she could tell he was no longer there.  The feeling she got when either Spike or Angel was nearby was completely gone.  Biting her lip, she turned and walked back to the car with Riley.


All the way back to the house of Revello Drive, all she could do was think about Spike and his reaction to Riley.  Between worrying about her mother, and worrying about Spike’s state of mind, she could barely follow what Riley was saying about being there for her and leaning on him whenever she needed to.

When she realized he was beginning to plan the rest of the week for her, including her taking time off from slaying, and his moving in to the house until her mother came home, she held up a hand and stopped him.

“Riley, I appreciate all this thought.  I really do.  But let me figure out where and when I need you, OK?  I think Giles has the paperwork all covered; Willow and Tara will be helping me with Dawn; Mom has already made arrangements for coverage at the Gallery;  and of course, Xander and Anya are there if I need anything else.”

(OK, I think I got through that all right.  Managed to not mention Spike and still made it clear that he’s not making the decisions here.)

The big man’s face was still for a minute, then he said bitterly, “So, what you’re saying is you don’t really need me for anything.  Is that right, Buffy?”

Buffy looked at his closed, hurt face in dismay.  “No, no, I didn’t mean that at all.  I just meant that we...that I...was already handling most of those things and you don’t have to worry about them.”

She wrapped her arms around herself and tried to think of how she could avoid hurting this man who so obviously loved her.  She put a tentative hand on his arm and said softly,  “I do need you, Riley.  It’s just that I need you to ask me what I need- not make that decision for me.  Can you understand that?”

He sighed and touched her hand where it rested on his arm.  “I’m trying to, Buffy. But where I come from, a girl like you would expect her man to step in and...”

Buffy withdrew her hand slowly so he wouldn’t think she was angry, and answered before he could finish, “Riley, where you come from there ARE no girls like me.”

There was nothing to say to that, and they drove in silence the rest of the way to her house.

They entered the well-lit house to find Willow and Tara waiting with Dawn.  The two witches were anxious to return to the dorm, and wished everyone a good night as soon as Buffy came in.  Dawn looked at Riley curiously and turned to Buffy to ask, “Where’s—ow!“

A sharp look from Buffy, accompanied by a quick pinch, prevented the awkwardness that she knew would follow any inquiry about Spike.  Fortunately Dawn picked up on the silent message very quickly and she nodded her head at her sister before turning to go upstairs.

“I’m going to bed now.  Wake me up when you’re out of the bathroom in the morning, Buffy.  G’night, Riley.”

“Good night, Dawn. See you in the morning.”

Dawn shot her sister a startled look, but wisely made no comment as she went on up the stairs and into her room.


Chapter Six


“Are you staying?” she asked with little inflection in her voice.  She struggled to sound as though she wanted him to stay, but the best she could do was to keep the impatience out of her voice.

Riley watched Buffy as she walked around the house, turning off lights, checking doors and clearly preparing to go to bed for the night.  When she had run out of things to do before going upstairs, Buffy stopped in front of him and took a deep breath.

“Do you want me to?” he asked.  “I want to be here for you, Buffy. Whatever you need.”

Remembering how peacefully she had slept last night with Spike holding her, Buffy ducked her head and said,  “I could use some company while I sleep.  Somebody to just hold me?”

As soon as she saw his look of happy anticipation, she regretted asking him to stay.

(Great. Now he thinks I want to have sex.  How do I handle this without making him feel rejected all over again?)

Taking the bull by the horns, she looked him in the eye and said clearly, “I just need to get some sleep, Riley.  That’s all I want tonight.  I’m too worried about my mom to-“

Trying to hide his disappointment, he put his arms around her and assured her that he was fine with that.  Buffy tried to smother the urge to compare his smothering hug with Spike’s comforting embrace, as she forcefully reminded herself that this man was her boy friend.  The blond vampire, she insisted to herself, was just another Scoobie.  A good friend, perhaps, but...

When she slipped into bed, Buffy was once again wearing her flannel pjs and she saw Riley shoot her a disappointed look as he stripped to his boxers and slipped into bed beside her.  When he put his arms around her and she snuggled up to his warm body, she almost thought it was going to be okay.  She knew he loved her, and she could feel his desire to comfort her as he cuddled her small body and kissed her forehead.

It wasn’t long though, before he was running his hands over her back and pulling her up against his body so that she could feel his erection pressing against her leg.  She opted first for trying to pretend she was asleep, but quickly realized that wasn’t going to work as he became even bolder in an attempt to “wake” her up.

Buffy was torn about what she wanted to do.  On the one hand, this man was her boy friend.  She did care about him and it had been a while since they had made love.  On the other hand, she had specifically asked him to let her sleep and he was disregarding that request pretty vigorously. And somewhere in the back of her mind was a baritone voice saying, “think about how it made you feel and multiply that...”

While she was mulling over her options, Riley took her lack of rejection as acquiescence and began to pull her pajama top off over her head, ignoring the buttons.  He ran his hands over her breasts quickly, then went to her pj bottoms and began to slide them down her hips.

“Buffy,” he whispered.  “Please, Buffy.  It’s been a long time.  Just let me...”

“Riley, I asked you to let me sleep.  I really don’t want to....”

“I can make you want to,” he said as he pulled her against him again.  “You know I can.”

(Actually,)  she thought to herself, (you can’t.  You’re just pissing me off.)

Struggling not to say aloud what she was thinking, Buffy pushed against his chest, using just enough of her Slayer strength to make her point.

“Riley.  I really only wanted an all-night hug.  Can’t you do that?”

“No, I can’t do that.  What do you think I am? I can’t lie here next to you, touching you, and not want to....   I’m just a man, Buffy.”

“Yeah,” she said with a sigh, “I guess you are at that.”

(I guess it takes a demon to have that kind of self-control.  A soulless, impulsive, obsessive demon.)

When he tried to pull her back to him again, thinking that her agreement about his gender meant she was going to let him have his way, she surprised herself by almost snarling at him as she shoved him away and turned her back.  She thumped her pillow once or twice, mostly to relieve her frustration at having nothing else to punch, and then resolutely closed her eyes.

“Good night, Riley,” she ground out between gritted teeth.  “If this is too hard for you, feel free to go down to the couch.”

Riley was quiet for a minute or two, then jumped to his feet and picked up his clothes from the floor.  “You can be a real bitch, Buffy.  Did you know that?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’ve it heard it before,” she said, trying not to smile as she remembered who most often used that term around her.

The big man stomped out of the room and down the stairs.  He sat on the couch in the dark for a while, then stood up and determinedly went out the door and got in his car. Across the street, a dark figure stepped out of the shadows and frowned as he watched the soldier drive away.

Spike looked back and forth between the house and the rapidly disappearing car, then made up his mind and whirled to follow the man who had just left Buffy alone in her bed.  Delight that the two humans hadn’t made love warred with his anger that the man who claimed to love her would leave rather than comfort her without getting something in return.

(Wonder if he’s gone to get his rocks off somewhere else?  He’s not likely to find much down here in the warehouse district except....bloody hell! He just went into the vamp whorehouse!)

Spike strode into the building, confident in his ability to take out any of the wimpy vampires who got their blood by drinking from willing humans.  No one challenged him as he walked through the warehouse with long, businesslike strides and he soon found the room where he watched surreptitiously as Riley gave money to a thin, angular female vampire.  When she had tucked the money away, she undid the soldier’s pants and pulled up her skirt.  The sight of her elongating fangs was all it took to get the man hard, and he was soon pounding into her, groaning as she sank her teeth into his arm and began taking long pulls of his blood.

In spite of the disgust he felt, Spike did not interrupt the two oblivious creatures coupling inside the small room.  He whirled and left the building with no idea where he was going, only knowing that he needed to be moving and he needed to kill something.

“Soddin’ bloody wanker!  Leaves the Slayer on the night before her mum is going have a serious operation and goes to a vamp whore.”  The vampire kept of a litany of British invective as he roved through Sunnydale’s cemeteries looking for something on which he could take out his anger.

He considered going back to Revello Drive, but he didn’t want to take a chance that Buffy would catch him watching her house when she thought her boy friend was there.  He’d fought the urge to follow them for more than an hour after hearing Riley talk about taking her home and going to bed.  He tried to get so drunk that he would pass out and forget what he heard, but ran out of JD long before he reached the passing out point, and long after he was sober enough to make good decisions.

  The result was he’d found himself standing under the tree in Buffy’s yard, listening to sounds of them getting ready for bed.  His vampire hearing allowed him to hear her tell Riley all she wanted was an all-night hug, and his gratitude that he wasn’t going to hear them make love was tempered by the pain of knowing she wanted comfort from her human boy friend rather than him.

When he heard Riley’s heart rate increase, and realized the man was growing aroused, he almost couldn’t restrain himself from leaping onto the roof and into the room.  His eyes flashed yellow and he cringed inwardly in anticipation of hearing the sounds of Buffy making love with the man in her bed.  He was so wrapped up in the misery he was anticipating, that he almost missed her reaction and subsequent suggestion that Riley sleep on the couch.  Years of being able to read her moods meant he could tell from her increased breathing and heart rate exactly how brassed off she was at Riley’s attempts to seduce her.  Spike had snarled scornfully when he heard Riley insist he could make her want him.

Relief and joy had flooded his body when he heard the other man tromp down the stairs, cursing to himself.  He’d pulled back into the shadows across the street just fast enough to avoid being seen when the angry man exited the house.

Now that he knew where Riley had been going, he was left with the question of what to do with the information.  It hadn’t appeared that the man was unfamiliar with the whorehouse.  He drove right to it and was already in a room with a vamp when Spike got there.  That told Spike that this was not the first time Riley had been there.

His stomach clenched a little at the thought of Dawn or Joyce, or even Buffy, being endangered by the former commando.  While most vamps that working in places like that were not willing to give up their meal tickets by killing or turning them, it was always a possibility.

His inner debate was interrupted by the arrival of a group of fledgling vamps looking to make a name for themselves by taking out the vampire who killed his own kind.  The joy on Spike’s face as he realized he had something on which to take out his fear and anger should have alarmed the other vampires, Unfortunately for them, it didn’t.

With a swirl of black leather, he took out the two closest to him without even slowing down.  The broken necks he gave them didn’t dust them, but they were completely unable to continue the fight.  His momentum carried him into the next two in the group, and he was able to get off several good punches and a roundhouse to a jaw before they realized that it was going to take all of them working together to handle the master vampire.

Spike’s strength, speed and joy in the fight allowed him to hold his own against the six vampires left trying to kill him, but numbers were not on his side and he knew he was one sucker punch away from being in real trouble.  Just as he was debating the wisdom of running away, the vampire in front of him disappeared in a puff of dust and he saw a blond vision smiling at him through the dust.

“Can I play, Spike?  Or are you keeping all the fun for yourself?” she asked with her perkiest smile.

“I can spare a few, Slayer.  Which ones do you want?”

The verbal by-play wasn’t lost on the remaining five young vampires and they looked back and forth between the two blonds as realization set in.

“Hey, our mistake.  No harm, no foul, right?” the oldest one said, edging away from the stake-twirling Slayer.  “We’ll just be on our—“

He was cut off by the swoosh of a stake though the air and looked down at his chest in dismay just before he exploded.  Before the others could react, Buffy was on them and she made short work of the two she tackled as Spike went to work on the other two.  When he had broken their necks and thrown the bodies down with the first two, he sat on a tombstone and watched in admiration while Buffy played with the last one standing.

As she punched and kicked the unfortunate vamp around the clearing, Spike strolled over to pick up her stake and used it to dust the four he had left on the ground. As he finished, he saw that Buffy’s punching bag of choice was incapable of getting up again and he tossed her the stake with a, “Here, pet. Put him out of his misery.”

Soon there was nothing left but a lot of dust piles and two very satisfied blond predators.

“Well, that felt good,’ Buffy said, letting out a sharp breath. “I had some tension to work off.”

To Spike’s surprise, he was able to keep a grip on his tongue and avoid any innuendos about why she was tense.  The last thing he wanted to do was to remind her that she could have shagged away the tension with her boyfriend.  Instead he rolled his shoulders to loosen them up and agreed, “Yeah, had some frustrations myself.”

That said, they lapsed into an uncomfortable silence as they both tried to pretend that Buffy shouldn’t be home in bed with her boyfriend rather than standing around in a graveyard with another vampire.

While Spike mentally battled conflicting urges to tell her about Riley’s activities or not tell her to avoid adding to the things she was dealing with, Buffy surprised him by saying softly,  “He left me.”

The vampire didn’t pretend not to know who she was talking about, just looked at her out of the corner of his eye and said, “That right, pet?”

“Yes.  He just called me a bitch because all I wanted was to be held, like...like you did last night.   I didn’t think that was too much to ask from somebody who’s supposed to love me.”

She didn’t notice Spike’s wince at her last remark, she just felt his arms go around her gently as he whispered in her ear,  “It’s not too much to ask, love.  Never should be.  Bloody pillock is too stupid to appreciate what he has if you ask me.”

“Didn’t ask you,” she mumbled into his chest as she relaxed into his arms and let the feelings of safety and comfort wash over her.

(I wonder what kind of Slayer feels safe and warm standing in a cemetery at night with a master vampire’s arms around her?)

“True, but you know me, gonna give you my opinion whether you want it or not.”  She could hear the smile in his voice and snorted in an unladylike fashion as she looked up at him.

They smiled into each other’s eyes for a minute until Spike could feel himself responding to the warm body he was still holding lightly. He moved back slightly so that Buffy would not feel the evidence of his desire against her stomach.

(Last thing I want to do right now is make her think I can’t control myself around her either.  She needs know she can lean on me without my wantin’ something in return.)

In spite of his having pulled his body back from hers, Buffy could tell from the way his eyes darkened that he was reacting to her nearness the way he always did.  Anger at Riley fueled the ever-present attraction she felt toward the blond vampire, and Buffy unconsciously licked her lips as she stared at his openly needy face
.
“Ah, Slayer.  Don’t do that to me, love.  You know I want to kiss you so bad I—“ 

He was cut off as she suddenly stood on her toes and pressed her mouth to his firmly.  His arms instinctively tightened around her, pulling her willing body against his as he deepened the kiss.  Once again, Buffy’s world narrowed to the soft, supple lips moving over hers and the cool tongue exploring her mouth.  Her arms crept around his neck and she allowed him to support her as she let her body melt into his lean muscular one.

She felt her underwear growing damp and Spike’s smothered growl as he smelled her arousal.  Rather than finding the growl intimidating, she was surprised to find herself even more turned on as it vibrated against her body.

(Ooookay.  I know that one’s not in the Slayer handbook.  Growling vampire should not equal lusty Buffy.  Something must be very wrong with me...)

After several minutes of bone melting kisses, Buffy pulled back slightly to get her breath and try to get a grip on her libido.  Spike continued to hold her lightly around the waist, but allowed her to decide how close they would get and if the kissing would continue.  His demon was screaming to be let out and allowed to take this woman and it took all his self-control to keep his face smooth and his expression hopefully expectant.

“I...I need to get home.  I left Dawn there by herself,” she said in a shaky voice. 

“Right, then.  You should go.”  He reluctantly slipped his hands off her waist and shoved them into his pockets.  Every muscle in his body was trembling with the effort it took to let go of her strong little body.  “D’you want me to walk you home?” he asked softly.

“What I want is...” she stopped herself before she could say anything she couldn’t take back and stood up straighter.  “No, thank you.  I don’t think that’s a very good idea.  Just in case Riley gets over his fit of temper and decides to come back...”

“You wouldn’t let him in if he did, would you, pet?”  He surprised both of them with the urgency in his voice.

Buffy looked at him curiously and asked, “Well, probably, if I thought he was going to leave me alone.  Why?”  She peered at him intently; something about his look reminded her of the conversations about the booby trap in his crypt.  “Do you know something I should know?” she demanded sharply.

“I hope not, love,” he answered cryptically, deciding he wasn’t going to tell her about the soldier’s vamp whore until he had talked to her Watcher.

She stared at him for a minute, tapping her foot in irritation, all lust banished by the knowledge that once again he knew something she didn’t and that he wasn’t planning to tell her what it was.

“So help me, Spike.  If you’re hiding something from me again....”

“Jus’ go home and try to get some kip, Slayer.  You don’t want your mum to think you’ve been up all night worrying, do you?”

The way her lower lip poked out told him she was only postponing, not abandoning, the conversation she wanted to have; but she opted let it go for the time being.  Breathing an unnecessary sigh of relief, he leaned forward and kissed her on the top of her head as he said, “Good night, Slayer.  I’ll see you tomorrow sometime.”  He gave her a little push in the direction of her house and turned to go to his crypt before the sun came up.

Buffy stared after him with her brow furrowed, then whirled and stomped off in the direction of Revello Drive muttering to herself about, “secrets, sneaky, lying vampires...”

tbc