Note: Thanks to my beta t_geyer for her unending patience, perseverance and support.

SECTION 3 - MY LAST BREATH

Hold on to me love
You know I can't stay long
All I wanted to say was
I love you and I'm not afraid


(Evanescence - Album - Fallen)




Chapter 3.02
Monday, May 27th, 2002


"What the hell do you mean she passed away?" Anya kept a hold of Xander's hand as he took a step toward the doctor, pulling him up before he could get in the man's face, but Xander barely noticed. "What the hell kind of hospital is this? She was fine when they put her in the ambulance. She was awake. She was talking to us."

Giles positioned himself between the younger man and the physician. "Xander, I'm sure the doctors did everything they could."

"Yeah? Then why does everybody that comes in here die?"

The doctor cleared his throat. "From what we were able to see, Miss Rosenberg's trachea was badly scorched, and you mentioned some sort of explosion. It seems likely that she inhaled some hot air which scorched her throat and her lungs. There were also indications that there was some sort of internal bleeding probably due to the concussive effect of the blast. The fact that she survived so long as she did was a measure of her determination but it was a battle that ultimately she could not sustain."

"That's-."

"Xander!" Surprisingly, it was Tara's voice which cut across whatever the brunette's next tirade had been going to be. "Willow is gone and creating a scene is not going to change that." She turned to the physician. "Her family are Jewish. By tradition someone should remain with her from now until she is buried. Will there need to be an autopsy?"

"What are you talking about?" Xander interrupted. "Willow has never been into all that. I mean she went along with it to please her dad but you know-."

Giles shook his head disapprovingly. "Willow is dead and what happens to her earthly remains is probably not of great concern to her except that to diverge from Jewish tradition would cause her family additional distress. I don't believe she would have wanted that."

"She wanted it this way. Perhaps, if she had survived her parents, it might have been different but not as things are," Tara confirmed before returning to the physician. "Can I sit with her until her parents can be contacted? Her mother should be back from lunch soon but she shouldn't be alone."

"I'm sure that something can be arranged." The doctor ushered her toward the door through to the ER. "You asked about an autopsy? In light of her family's likely religious objections and given there's no evidence of foul play I suspect that the autopsy will be waived. The coroner may need to take a blood sample to do a tox screen as a formality, but we can discuss that with her parents and their rabbi when we can reach them."

"Thank you."

Just before she and the doctor disappeared Giles spoke one last time. "I'm going to try driving over to Willow's mother's office. As you say, she should be back soon and I think perhaps the news may be best broken face to face. When I come back I'll check in on you, okay?" He gave the girl a reassuring smile.

"Sure." With a gentle nod the girl disappeared after the doctor into the emergency treatment area.

---

"Buffy?" Wes turned to face the bed occupied by the elder of the two Summers girls when he heard movement.

Buffy's eyelids fluttered for a second and then she managed to keep them open. "Wes? Where's Spike?"

"So far as I know he's still at the magic shop, but Fred promised to tell him where you were if he came 'round so it's entirely possible that he might be on his way here already."

"Dawnie?"

"Next bed over. She's still unconscious, I'm afraid."

"Is she going to be okay?"

"The doctors haven't been able to find anything wrong with her. I suspect she'll come 'round in her own good time, but the longer she stays out the worse it looks... but then I suppose you know more about what she's going through than I do."

"Willow..." Anger gave the slayer more animation than she had managed so far. "She tried to use Dawn like some sort of human battery. If Spike hadn't given her the orbs Willow would have sucked the life right out of her. What on earth did she think she was doing?"

"She was fighting a battle with a god," Wes responded in a calming tone. "A battle she won, but in which she ultimately gave her own life."

"W-Will... dead?"

"She survived the ritual, but she died before she reached the hospital. By the time Giles was able to contact her mother there was only just time to arrange for her burial today."

"Today? How? I mean what about all the arrangements... picking a casket... flowers... everything?"

"Jewish tradition dictates wherever possible that burial happens on the day of death. Normally, the coffin would be plain pine, though technically any wooden coffin is acceptable. The ceremony is supposed to be as simple as possible so flowers are considered inappropriate. Most of the arrangements would be taken care of by the Chevra Kadisha, the morticians."

"When?"

"About two hours from now."

Buffy looked over at her sister's bed, her eyes welling up with tears as she remembered not the recent arguments that had separated her and Willow, but the years of friendship they had shared. "B-But I can't leave Dawnie, not until I know she's okay."

"No one would expect you to. There's a period of mourning after the funeral. I'm sure you'll be able to pay your respects then."

"Wes, can you call the shop and check on Spike? Please?"

A woman's voice came from the doorway as Bee came in, a cup of vending machine coffee in either hand. "I'll do that, if you want," she offered, passing one of the cups to Wes and then holding the other out for Buffy. "You look like you need a shoulder to lean on and I think the boss, there, would do a better job of filling in for Spike than I can."

"Perhaps on your way past the desk you could let one of the nurses know that Buffy's conscious now?" Wes suggested.

The small woman gave a half-smile. "Sure."

---

Spike fought for consciousness, his mate's grief acting as a goad to bring him from his sleep. His chest hitched as he tried to draw his first waking breath, but the weight on his rib cage made it more difficult than it should have been. His eyelids opened and blue eyes stared into bluer.

The vampire raised a lead-like arm and pushed the Siamese off his torso. "Bugger off, ya stupid, cross-eyed excuse for a moggie."

"Rowwr." The cat seemed to protest his intelligence, his pedigree and his perfect vision.

It took Spike a while to figure out where he was, but even longer to make his way upstairs from the basement on unresponsive limbs. He wasn't too surprised to find Angel, Cordelia and Fred still there when he got upstairs... and he didn't waste any time on pleasantries.

"Where's Dawn? What happened to her?"

Angel rolled his eyes, but he knew better than to provoke the blond unnecessarily in his present mood. "Dawn and Buffy were taken to the hospital along with Willow. Fred's talking to that girl who works for Wes now."

Spike did his best to stride over and grab the phone from Fred's grasp, but it was more like an arthritic shuffle and then accepting the handset as Fred passed it to him. "Who's dead?" he barked.

"Willow didn't make it to the hospital." Again, it was Angel who answered his question.

"Dawn?" This time his voice was more of a croak.

Bee's voice sounded hollow over the phone line. "She was still unconscious last time I was upstairs, but Buffy only just came 'round so maybe in a bit... Buffy was asking for you."

"Tell her I'll be there in ten minutes to-."

"It might take you a little longer than that, " Angel cut in. The older vampire picked up the pouch that held the orbs from the floor near the sofa where Cordelia was lying, apparently only just conscious. He held them in his hand and then moved until the sunlight from the high windows touched his skin.

As Spike watched, Angel's fingers began to smoke.

"She drained them dry?"

"Flat as a car battery when you leave the headlights on all night." Angel tossed the pouch underhand to the other vampire who only just caught them. "...And Giles borrowed your car to take Willow's ex home to get changed and then to the funeral."

He felt no surge of strength, and belatedly he realised that when Angel had picked them up there had been no telltale light show. Sticking the useless globes into his coat pocket, he returned to his telephone conversation. "Tell her I'll be there as soon as I can." Spike turned on his heel and headed back to the store's basement. He'd just have to do it the old-fashioned way.