A Certain Amount of Connecting by Verity Watson

Chapter #1 - A Cetain Amoung of Connecting

Nothing like an impending apocalypse to send you into the arms of an unlikely lover. S’only natural. I’d ‘ve been prepared for it, too. For her - raw, sexual, intense. I’d stood by for years now, willing to fill her needs. Protected her an’ bit, best I could. This time, though … damn. Who’d ‘ve known that this time, the worst time, when she’s facing not certain death for just herself but the end of everything, who’d ‘ve known she’d need me? Not my body, but my hard-won soul? Maybe she’ll deny it. Loves to whistle that tune. Tell me she doesn’t feel anything for me, that I was never close. Me, I seem to remember a certain amount of connecting. *** That night, the night I found out I could hurt her … I believed the rules had changed. She’d become like me. Given too much of herself, finally lost some of that humanity she prized. When she slammed my back against the wall, forced her body against mine, I thought I’d triumphed. We’d kissed before, but this goes beyond passion. Beyond hunger. She bruises my lips with hers, pushes me into the wall so hard I hear plaster cracking. I turn, never breaking the embrace, shoving my body against hers. She pushes me away, not hard, but I stumble backwards, certain that, despite the intensity of her kiss, she’s about to run off. I’m amazed when she launches herself at me, wrapping her legs around my waist, grinding against me, deepening our kiss. Without thought, my arms reach out and grab her ass, firm under her leather skirt. She’s writhing. One arm linked behind my neck, the other hand … she’s unbuckling my belt. I can hear her breathing, quickening. I reach under her skirt, carelessly push aside her panties, slip a finger inside. She’s drenched. Her heat burns. In the space of seconds, she’s freed my cock and pushes against the wall, lifting her hips. I feel her searching, and without a thought, I guide myself inside of her. She swallows and meets my eyes as she takes me in with one efficient thrust. Determined, aware. Her eyes meet mine. She’s small and tight and I wonder if I’m hurting her. But there’s no pain in her gaze, only permission. In the space of seconds, the impossible that became inevitable has become my world. We’re kissing again, this time giving as much as we take. It’s messy, inexpert, rushed. Dust rises. I am dimly aware that the chandelier has crashed through the floorboards just inches from the Slayer’s back. And then I’m falling, her body clasped to mine. Flat on my back, I land in the basement, any pain dulled by the woman surrounding me. Her eyes are closed, but I look up, survey her face. She’s concentrating, working. I smile. I’m starving for this girl, have been for years, but I’ve made love to many women. Made them scream. She isn’t going to control this, isn’t going to take her pleasure quickly and leave me wanting. I’m going to make her feel things she hasn’t dared imagine. I fight for control. My features stay human, I bite back my own climax. My fingers reach for the tiny nubbin of flesh above her entrance. I stroke her, gently. Her hips don’t stop their rough, undulating rhythm, but I hear her gasp. “Unh … “ Heaven. I continue, gentling the intensity of my thrusts. She responds, slowing, lengthening her strokes until she’s almost leaving me with every thrust. “That’s it, pet. Relax.” I’m murmuring now, and I see her gulp, sense her muscles tightening, feel her body spasm. Her eyes open, she arches her back and tilts her head backwards, too, exposing her neck. I lean up, licking and kissing her jugular without removing my fingers. “Yes, love. Come for me.” She’s cresting, peaking, and I pinch hard, twist that sensitive flesh. She wails. I can’t wait any longer. She’s still whimpering, gasping. I flip her over, forcing her onto her back. My motion is even and steady but gaining force. I close my eyes and melt into her heat. “Unh … harder!” She groans. My eyes open, surprised. She’s ready for me, ready for more, and now her hips are rising at an almost frantic pace, meeting me thrust for thrust. She wraps a leg around my waist. I angle in a little deeper, and she urges me on, her hands grasping at my shoulders, pulling me into her. I oblige, pushing into her with all of my strength. I drop my weight on her, wrapping around her, crushing her, pounding against her walls. I’m losing control now, and I come, screaming. *** She’s not content. Neither am I. No sooner have I spilled inside of her than I want to feel it again. The burning heat of her body, the greedy way her hands reach for me. I raise up on my elbows. Her hands immediately go to my arms and begin an insistent caress of my shoulders and chest. I move, slightly, hardening again. Slow now, almost gentle. Her eyes open, meet mine. Defiant, she grasps my hips, trying to force me into a quicker rhythm. “Uh uh, Slayer. I want to see you.” She’s without voice, trying to ignore my words. I stop abruptly, withdraw. “I want to see all that gorgeous golden skin you hide from me.” I grab her hands, pull us both to a standing position. I walk behind her, shrug her jean jacket from her shoulders. I unzip her skirt. The soft leather pools at her feet. “Here, pet.” She steps forward, obedient. Her breathing is labored. I coast my palms over her camisole, forcing it up. “Raise your arms.” She’s almost bare, now. I step closer, embracing her, touching her skin with eager hands. I unhook her bra, sink to my knees, and nibble, lick, suck at the soft flesh of her breasts. She’s distracted by my ministrations, doesn’t realize that I’m carefully removing her panties, stuffing them in my back pocket. Souvenir. Kissing down her belly, I crouch lower. I slide two fingers inside her center. She quivers. My tongue flicks over her clit, and she tenses. “Shh shh shh, love.” Drawing my fingers out, I lick them clean. “I want to taste you.” My tongue pushes into her hot core. Her taste – I sense raw power, but she’s sweet, too. I could get drunk on her. I lap at the delicate folds of flesh, but something’s wrong. She’s stiff, unresponsive. I pull away, lean back on my heels. She’s turned her head away. I doubt myself for a minutes and then it occurs to me. I can see, even in the darkened room, that’s she’s blushing. “They’ve never done this for you, then? None of them?” I’m a little amazed. Then, she was a virgin with Angel. Soldier boy never struck me as the generous type. And the pretty boy who used her? Probably not in his repertoire, either. I pull off my jacket, drape it around her, ease her to the floor. She clenches her thighs together. “Open your legs, love.” Her face is a mask of confusion, but there’s lust there, too. I lower myself, kissing and stroking her thighs. She opens to me, slowly. First small, puppy dog laps. She sighs. I use my hands to push her knees farther apart, settling in between her legs. I dart my tongue into her core and she responds violently, thrusting her hips so hard I reel backwards. I meet her gaze now. Something in her has snapped. She’s ready for me, ready for something she hasn’t had before this night. I give her a questioning look, pause for effect. She strains towards my mouth. I oblige, this time using my fingers, my teeth. She moans, and she’s sopping wet now, not just from my attentions but her uninhibited response. I pull my fingers out of her hot little cunt and stray lower. I slide one slick finger into her tight asshole. She tenses, then howls as her orgasm sweeps over her. “Think you should return the favor, pet.” Leaving no time for her to recover, I straddle her, forcing my cock towards her mouth. She eagerly accepts me, takes me in, sucking inexpertly but with a delicious force. I wrap a hand in her hair, guiding her in a smooth motion. It’s incredible, to watch her sweet pink lips enveloping my shaft. But this isn’t how I want to come just yet. I thrust roughly, testing her limits, then pull out. “On your knees.” She surprises me by grabbing for my cock as I pull away. “Uh uh, sweetheart. Do as I say.” It’s vicious now. I enter her from behind, cupping her ass in my hands, then reaching around to fondle her breasts. I put all of my force behind each thrust. She urges me on. “Harder!” “You like it rough, don’t you Slayer?” “Unh … more!” “Bossy lil’ thing, aren’t you? What do you want, baby, tell me?” “Want you.” “What do you want me to do to you?” She grunts. Won’t say it. I pull out, almost all the way. Only the tip of my cock is still touching her. “Fuck me, Spike!” At her words, I thrust in to the hilt, bury myself in her sweetness. She’s bucking her hips against me, begging me now, “Please! Don’t stop!” That gives me an idea. I pull out all the way. Tear my clothes off. She whimpers, starts to turn. “No. Stay just as you are, love.” I wrestle my jeans past my ankles, then rip the belt from the loops. I wrap the buckle end around my palm, then crack the leather across her cheeks. “Oh!” It’s more surprise than pleasure. Thwack! I hit her again, harder this time. I’m strong, and a master with a whip. But her body is built for punishment. “Find your dark side, Slayer.” Again! A red welt is rising on her tawny flesh. She’s groaning, shoving that luscious ass up to meet the belt. I flick the leather against her pussy, something she didn’t expect. She roars. I quickly drop the belt and shove my cock inside. My fingertips bruise her hips and I pull her towards me, meeting every thrust. Her breathing is ragged. I lose myself in her, and she takes advantage. Surges forward, away from me. I try to catch her, but she’s pushing me on my back. She straddles me, rides me with as much violence as I used on her body. I reach for her breasts, but she stops me. “I don’t think so. My turn.” She pins my wrists above my head with one hand. I let her go, let her grind her clit against my body. She releases my wrists, but I obediently refrain from pleasuring her. Her hands rest on my chest now. Her eyes close and she’s moaning, unrestrained. She’s arching back with every thrust. Feels like she could tear me off, take my cock with her, but the pain helps me focus and control. She won’t stand for me coming before she’s taken her fill. It starts, I can tell, by the way her motions intensify. “Ummm … right there. Yes!” She’s murmuring and then repeating, mindlessly, “oh yes … yes … yes … oh, Spike … yes!” Her eyes are squeezed shut. As she climaxes, she rakes her nails across my chest, drawing thin lines of perforated flesh. I’m seconds away from my own fulfillment. She collapses on top of me, but I grab her by the hair. “No fair, baby … I want something, too.” And I push down, feel her weakly taking my cock in her mouth. “That’s right, love.” I prop up and watch her soft mouth surrounding me. “A little faster, love. Uhn … uhn … Buffy!” I grab her head, make sure she has no choice but to swallow as the contractions rip through me. This time I fall back, spent. She crawls up my body, smiling mischievously. I meet her eyes for a fraction of a second, before she’s kissing me, filling me with the taste of our bodies. *** This kiss is enough to stir me again. We don’t break apart for long minutes, and I’m rock hard when she finally pauses to breathe. I wriggle a bit, find my way to her opening and start to ease in. She gasps, but I can tell this pain isn’t the good kind. “Baby?” Now I feel it, too. She’s swollen, maybe torn inside, too. “Shh, love.” I ease out. “Shhh … “ I slide a finger inside, testing. “There, love … there …” she’s wetter with each gentle thrust of my hand. “Come here.” And I kiss her mouth, slowly now. She relaxes as her body responds. I slide my cock in, just the tip. “I won’t go any farther than you let me, promise.” She nods. “Want more?” “Yes.” I ease in just a bit farther. My strokes are shallow, unhurried. She’s moving with me now, matching me. Her curls are damp, brushing against my cock with every motion. She’d loosened up considerably after our first go, but now she’s bruised and tender and grasping me tight. I’m still only about halfway inside, fighting for control while looking for something to put her over the edge. I lick my index finger and reach behind, pausing at her tight little asshole. I slide the tip in, cautiously. This time she doesn’t resist. Instead, she opens for me. I try a second finger and she shudders, but not from pain. An orgasm is washing over her, slow and consuming. Her eyes meet mine as she comes down from her peak and I recognize the emotion on her face – gratitude. I’m intrigued by the way she’s opened up to me, almost daring me to go further. I readjust the two fingers buried in her asshole, pushing into her then slowly drawing back out. She relaxes more, and I add a third finger. My t-shirt is just at arm’s reach. I ease my fingers out. “Gonna make you feel so good, baby.” I murmur, kissing her lips. I lie her on her stomach, balling up my shirt to make a pillow. Tracing her spine with kisses, I come to her firm backside and use my tongue and fingers to explore her fully. I bury four fingers inside of her. She opens up to me, welcomes my greedy hands. I knead the base of her spine with my other palm and she relaxes more. “Here we go, pet, stay open, just like you are now.” I whisper as I position my tip at her entrance. She tenses for a second, a reaction to pain. “Gonna make you feel so good, love. Let me in.” I watch her struggle, and strain against her. She lets me in, just an inch, but my thrusts slowly bury all of me in her tight ass. She sighs, and more than anything that soft sound almost costs me my self-restraint. Instead, I start to move. “Feels so good, Spike.” She gasps. “Want feels good, Slayer?” “You.” “Me doing what, precisely?” “Fucking me!” Her voice is rough, breathy as I increase the pace. “More, love. Where am I fucking you?” “Unh!” “What am I doing to you, Buffy?” “Taking me … taking me up the ass!” “That’s what you want, isn’t it, princess? The hard fuck.” I grunt. She’s so goddammned tight I can barely hold back. “Umm … fill me, Spike. Fill me up!” Her command surprises me. She pushes back so hard that I have no choice but to obey. I spill deep inside of her, flooding her with come. We collapse together this time. *** She’s breathing so hard, gasping for breath. And glowing. “You need me, love.” “Need you? Hardly.” “You need what I can give you.” I prop myself up on my elbow, skim my hand over her skin, between the valley of her breasts. “Ummm … need you.” “That’s right. You need someone to hurt you a bit.” I pinch a nipple, twist, and tug. “Need someone to wake your body from your self-imposed celibacy.” “I’m not celibate!” “Might as well be.” I repeat my actions with her other nipple. “Bastard!” “No, actually. My parents were happily married. Kiss me.” “No!” “Kiss me!” I pull her to me, roughly, heedless of her sensitive flesh. She moans into my mouth. I draw out her tongue, sucking. We shift a bit until we’re sitting upright, her legs wrapped around my waist. She moans, breathless. We sense things, vampires do … a quickening heartbeat, the scent of arousal. She’ll take more, as much as I can give. Hours ago, I’d set out to be a skillful lover. I’m far past that point, lost in her, needing to not stop, craving this closeness to the one I’ve adored from afar. I’m not fully erect, but I slip inside. Her eyes close, then open, lock with mine. The first time we’ve really met each others’ gaze since we tumbled through the floorboards. For a minute I wonder if she’s thought of others while I covered her with my flesh, but I quickly dismiss the possibility. I’ve claimed her tonight. She’s mine, as surely as if I’d turned her and raised her from the ground. I scarcely move my hips, guiding her in the gentlest rocking motion. She’s hot to the touch, and I’ve stolen her warmth, been coated in her sweat. In our embrace, you couldn’t tell that I’m not alive. I don’t know that I’m not alive. When she climaxes, little more than a shudder and gasp, I know this is the last time for tonight. I hurry to finish, and her eyelids droop as I fill her one last time. In slumber, she trusts me, as I lie her back on my duster, cover us with her skirt. Draped in black leather, I pull her to my chest and for a moment she rests peacefully. I close my eyes, thinking of the morning to come. In dreams, I imagine slipping in through her bedroom window, sharing her clean white bed. Tying her wrists to the swirling iron headboard with her scarves, kissing the length of her form. Loving her with my body, if she’ll never permit me more. And then she’s turning away from me in sleep, and I wake to find her body inches from mine. Miles away, more like. She’s gone. And in the light of day, recriminations come and she’s angry for the pleasure I gave her. Furious that she dropped her proud warrior stance, took a lover just like anyone made of flesh and blood. I think, after she storms out, that I’ve had my one good day. I fall back into the rubble, drifting in and out of sleep. One good day. I want more. *** And now she lies here, in my arms. Asleep at last, even with the world crashin’ down on her shoulder blades and the ingrates back home blindly tryin’ to fashion a strategy without their hero. I watch shadows on the ceiling, kiss her forehead, stroke her blonde locks. Painful thing about a soul isn’t so much the regret. It’s the capacity for hope. Thinkin’ that maybe she’s forgiven my trespasses. Lost some monster, I did, by loving her, by fighting on her side. Gained some man on my own, too. Enough to believe that tonight’s fierce and gentle embrace might cancel out our scarred past. Might be a beginning. Funny thing, to want a beginning when you’re starin’ at the end. She snuggles closer, sighs contentedly. I can feel her heart beat, a steady, calming rhythm. I close my eyes, bare my soul. Once again, I’m controlling myself, fighting my base impulses, giving her what she requires. Connecting. Trying. Sleeping like sister and brother lost in the woods, huddled together for warmth. A slave to her, always near, never close, but now, tonight … Tonight - connecting.