Burn by BloodStainedSnow
 
 
Chapter #1 - 1
 
A/N: Thanks to dawnofme for the beta work.

Taking another swig of his blood cocktail, Spike’s frown deepened. His glass hung limp from his hand as he slouched in his chair. The candles lighting the crypt flickered, creating dancing shadows on the stone walls and reminding him of sweeter nights with his golden goddess.

Except she wasn’t his golden goddess—wasn’t his anything. Although her body burned for his touch, her words kicked him, leaving bruises on his battered heart. Once again, she played her high-and-mighty card and tossed him aside.

Spike held no delusion of being enough for Buffy. Despite always opening his arms to her when she came for a fix, the destructive and abusive nature of their rendezvous played clearly in his mind. Being love’s bitch, he let her call the shots, and that’s all she allowed it to be—sex with no emotions, no ties to him at all. Her barriers kept him from being able to love her like she deserved.

He raised the glass to his lips but halted before it touched. The attempt to dull his senses provided little relief. His hand loosened and dropped the glass on the floor, the shatter echoing through the room.

It could have been his heart shattering.

Standing, he began to pace, but that too failed to quiet his mind. If he could only make her see, but no—shutters covered her eyes.

A need to be good bubbled in his body, coursed through his veins. Ever since love struck him, the change had worked its way through every bit of him. Being with her burned, and he longed to be consumed by her radiance. A chance—that’s all he wanted—a chance to show her he could be exactly what she needed—partner, confidante, lover.

Her heart, so barricaded by years of fear and rejections, would be safe in his hands and would show him how to be right, to be good, and to be worthy of her touch.

Halting, Spike realized he had to make her see what he could be—for her. Grabbing his duster off the sarcophagus, he hurried out the door, leaving the candles to burn.