Spike had been pretty down lately. Sometimes Buffy wished she could just shake him. Where the hell was Spike under all this? She knew he had a soul, now, but – god. Did a soul do nothing but make vampires melancholy brood machines? Set after The Killer In Me, before Get It Done.

"Look, Buffy," Spike said. "I know it wasn’t the real reason you broke up with me, but honest, I wasn’t your dealer, your ‘Doctor’ or whatever. I was a bloody patsy is what I was." While Spike is suffering from a malfunctioning neuro-chip, Buffy finally lets him explain the events in As You Were.

“You didn’t join the party," Buffy said. "I sent Anya down to tell you.”
    “She did.” Spike shrugged. “Not really the party animal these days.”
    “I’d noticed.” Buffy nodded at his chains.
New Year's Eve, season seven.

“Even if he was okay with it, even if he was a bad person, even if... if he... did the same thing to someone else. That wouldn’t make what I did right.” Buffy talks to Dawn in the car ride home from the train yard, in Him.

Written for Spuffy Haven challenge, Art before Fic. Season Five, following FFL. Buffy is trying to deal with Joyce’s news, her own despair, a distraught sister, a possessive boyfriend and an extremely annoying vampire.

“Are you all right?” Spike asked.
“Perfectly normal,” Buffy said. “Spell’s all gone.”
“That wasn’t what I meant,” he said. “I meant... after what it made you.... After.”
Buffy and Spike talk just after the events of the episode Him.

Spike. Ensouled. Stuck in a basement. Alone. Scared. Mad. Tortured by guilt. “I don't have anywhere else to go.” Buffy already knows, that can't be true.

    “What’s happened?” Angel asked over the phone.
    “I just needed to talk to you,” Buffy said.
    Another pause. “About what?”
    Buffy almost blurted it out. Spike’s gotten his soul back! He’s gotten his soul, and it’s driven him mad. What the hell do I do?!

So he had won. He had survived. The universe was rent open, his soul was fetched from whatever nether-space it had been stashed in, and seared into his being like a brand. And then it began. The strident cacophony of what have I done? roared inside of him to epic proportions.  Nominee Sunnydale Memorial Fanfiction Awards Round 32, Best Angst.

After the Initiative is “shut down” a fatal decision is made that will change the face of the world and uproot everyone Buffy knows before placing her in the greatest jeopardy of her life.  A new world is born but is it one they would wish to live in? 

It's Buffy's 21st birthday! She's not feeling like herself.

From the prompt, "I wish Buffy wakes up tomorrow covered in monkey hair."

“I had a speech. I learned it all. Oh, god, she won’t understand, she won’t understand....”
On his way to earn his soul, Spike prepares his speech for when he gets back.

Anya overhears an idle wish at the Bronze, and suddenly there’s no more Spike. What would Buffy have been like without Spike to catch her after she came back from death? How far down would she fall?
WARNING: VERY DARK FIC!
Nominated at No Rest For The Wicked Awards

“Skip it. If you love her, skip it. She knows she’s done wrong. You’re both alive. Life’s short and sweet and precious. Love’s the only thing worth a damn. Don’t play games. Take her into your arms and taste her before it’s too late.” Tara comes to talk with Spike shortly after As You Were.

I’m sorry, William.
    Buffy’s parting words were still burning in his head. Why, why, why did she have to use that name?
Spike remembers his last evening as Buffy's lover. She'd been just one step away.... What happened?