Chapter 3- Ripper, the King of Shagging

“What?” Buffy asked, very confused. “First of all, why are you here, in my house? How did you get in? And since when are you back in town?” She paused and raised an eyebrow. “And what’s this about your name being William?”

“I arrived a while ago and spoke with your lovely mother,” he answered, standing up and ducking his head as she continued to stare at him. “She’s a very nice woman.”

“Yes, I know she is,” Buffy said, growing increasingly more thrown by the situation. “But why are you here?”

“I was in need of conversing with someone who would listen to me,” he answered quietly. “And I knew that your mother would be very compassionate.”

“Okay, Spike, either you’re very drunk or something’s wrong here,” she said, looking around the room. “Did you do something?”

“I do not know what you are talking about,” he said, tilting his head. “And I can assure you that I have not indulged in drinking any type of liquor tonight. That’s highly improper.” He clasped his hands in front of him and studied her. “And again, I must insist that you call me William. I do not know who this Spike is.”

‘This just keeps getting weirder and weirder,’ she thought, watching as he returned to sitting on the couch, once again opening her notebook.

“Alright, William, tell me something,” she said, sitting on a chair that was across from the sofa. “What year is it?”

“I believe it is 1998, correct?” he asked, and she nodded, frowning. “Is something the matter, miss?”

“My name is Buffy,” she said, and at his surprised expression, she continued, “It’s a nickname. My real name is Elizabeth.”

“A beautiful name for an equally beautiful woman,” he said before quickly ducking his head. “I am sorry for being so forward. Please do not think ill of me for saying such a thing.” She giggled quietly, which caught his attention.

“I didn’t mind it,” she replied before looking down, trying to think things through.

‘If it’s 1998 for him, too, then what’s going on?’ she asked herself. ‘He obviously is not himself, but the question is why? Actually, there are a lot more pertinent questions than that one, but if it’s the same year for him, why is he acting like he’s his pre-vampire self? Shouldn’t he be confused by technology and why he’s in Sunnydale and not in England?’ She watched him write something down in the notebook before raising his eyes to hers. ‘I can honestly say I’m beginning to wig out.’

“You do not look well, Miss Elizabeth,” he said, sounding concerned. “Would you like to sit down?”

“I think I need to talk to someone first,” she replied, quickly walking to her telephone and picking it up.

‘Is this being caused by a spell?’ she thought. ‘Who would make a mistake like this?’ She paused and began dialing a familiar number. ‘Willow.’

“Hello?” a cheery voice asked on the other line.

“Hi, Will, it’s me,” Buffy said. “Have you done any spells since you came home tonight?”

“No,” Willow answered, sounding confused. “Oz and Xander came over to watch a movie. Why?”

“Because there’s something very odd happening right now,” Buffy said, looking at Spike again. “Very odd.”

* * * * *

After explaining everything she had come up with, Buffy got off the phone with Willow and dialed another number, giving Spike a warm smile as a worried expression settled on his features.

“You’ve reached Ripper, the King of Shagging,” Giles said, which caused Buffy to nearly drop the phone. “Press one for a night of romance, two for a round of the rough and tumble type of-”

“Giles?” Buffy asked, cutting him off before he could say something to make her blush more.

“That’s me, luv,” he replied, seemingly excited by the sound of a young female voice. “What can I do for you?”

“You can stop freaking me out, for one,” she said. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing wrong with me,” he answered. “Who is this?”

“Buffy,” she answered. “Do you remember who I am?”

“Sure,” he said, which served to calm her anxiety… until he continued to speak. “You’re that bird I shagged senseless, right? The one who requested I use handcuffs?” She shrieked and slammed the phone down, which caused Spike to flinch and stand up, quickly making his way over to her.

“What is wrong, Buffy?” he asked, placing his hand on her shoulder. She looked at him with wide eyes, fighting off the urge to hug him for the amount of concern he was showing.

‘Why can’t Spike be like this all of the time?’ she asked herself. ‘Oh, that’s right- he’s not Spike.’ She looked into his eyes and sighed. ‘He’s William.’

“Feel like taking a stroll?” she asked him, and he nodded, still worried about her. “It’s time to go find out what’s going on around here.” She grabbed her keys and a jacket before ushering him out of the house.

“If you would like to talk about something, I would be honored to be of some service,” he said with a hopeful expression, and she managed a small smile.

“Thank you for the offer,” she replied. “But right now, I just want to talk to someone who might have an inkling of how to fix whatever is going wrong.”

* * * * *

Buffy knocked on Giles’ door a while later and waited for him to open it. After knocking twice and not getting a response, she frowned and took a step back.

“I know you’re in there, Giles,” she said loudly. “I can hear you playing Led Zeppelin!”

“What does that mean?” William asked, looking at her with puzzlement playing on his features.

“I’ll explain it later, Sp-William,” she said, catching herself. “And what I’m about to do isn’t going to look right, but trust me- it’s okay.” Before he could ask her what she was talking about, she kicked down Giles’ door and took a step inside. He watched her with a stunned expression before she looked at him and grinned. “Going to come in?”

“What?” he asked, not registering her words until he stopped looking at the broken door, now lying on the ground in Giles’ house. “Oh. Yes, I will join you.” He took a few steps in, and they both looked around, trying to see if anyone was in the main part of the apartment.

When Buffy saw movement out of the corner of her eye, she was shocked to see Giles coming down the steps, only a thin sheet wrapped around his hips and a cigarette dangling from his lips, a furious look on his face.

“Who the bloody hell are you?” he asked loudly, over the music. “And what did you do to my door? Haven’t you heard of knocking?”

“I did knock,” she replied as she walked to his stereo and turned it off. “Maybe you would’ve heard me if you had the volume lower!”

“Ripper, I liked that song,” a familiar voice said. “Why did you turn it off?” Buffy turned around with wide eyes as she saw Joyce walk down the stairs in a similar state of undress as Giles.

“Mom?” she asked before her eyes rolled back and she fainted.