Author's note: Aren't I quick with the updates? ;)

Beta'd by magnificent dawnofme and Mabel Marsters.

Enjoy!

Chapter 13


“What?” He frowned, convinced that he must have imagined her voice. Her telling him that she…


“I love you.”


He turned in Buffy’s arms and stared at her. There was no mockery in her eyes, no sign that would indicate she was saying it out of obligation or pity. The only thing he could see was the loving softness and gentle smile as she caressed his shoulders. He wanted to crawl into her skin and lose himself in her forever.


“She loves me. Me!”


“I do,” she confirmed and he dropped his eyes as he realized he must have spoken it aloud. “I wanted to tell you yesterday, but… I just…. I froze. I’m sorry.”


“Sorry? You’ve got nothing to apologize for. I’ve never expected--”


“But you deserve it. And you know what? So do I. I don’t care that you’re soulless or what everyone is going to think. I-I… deserve to be happy, don’t I? So what if you’re not normal. I don’t want that. I want you. You and your snarky attitude, the loving heart beneath the bravado, and the way you always see right through me, making me face the truth. Why shouldn’t I get what I want?” Buffy glanced away. “I’m gonna die in a few years anyway. Maybe I won’t even live to be 21.”


Spike grasped her shoulders and lightly shook her. “Don’t you dare say that! You’ll have me watching over your shoulder every second, you hear me? I’ll always be at your side… to the end of the bloody world if that’s where you’ll be.”


Not knowing what to say, Buffy melted into his arms, enjoying the comfort of his embrace. For the first time, she experienced what it felt like to share the burden. To let someone else be strong for her instead of her being forced to be the strong one all the time. And for a moment, she dared to think of the future. It felt amazing.


“Thank you,” she murmured.


His arms tightened around her in response, understanding her perfectly. Like he always did. That was the moment Xander entered the kitchen through the back door. He yelped and covered his eyes.

“Spike’s butt!”


Anya followed, closing the door behind her, and patted Xander on the shoulder. “It’s very nicely shaped. Hi, Buffy. I see the sexual tension has been resolved. Good for you!”


Xander peeked between his fingers. “Wait. What?”


Buffy left Spike’s arms and fidgeted with the sash on her bathrobe. “Uh…”


“We weren’t…” Spike fumbled to come up with a plausible excuse. “I mean, the Slayer had something in her eye and I was… helping.”


Anya raised an eyebrow and snatched the box of doughnuts from Xander’s limp hand, helping herself to a jelly one.


“It’s okay, Spike,” Buffy said.


“What? What’s okay?” Xander stood there gaping like a fish.


“We’re kinda… together,” Buffy said with a wince as she expected Xander to flip out.


He started to laugh. He laughed so hard he had to grip the edge of the table to hold himself upright.


“He drank a lot of coffee,” Anya explained.


“But… Spike’s gay!” Xander said after his giggles subsided.


“I’m bloody well not!”


“Come on, Spike. We both know you’re just covering.”


Spike watched with horror as Xander puffed himself up and stared at him patronizingly. “Don’t worry. It’s not your fault. Not many can resist the charm of the Xan-man.”


“Buffy!” Spike turned to her in assistance and Anya tilted her head to catch a peek of the very nice looking vampire’s behind.


“It was a dare, Xan,” Buffy admitted.


“Whatever you say, Buffster.”


Xander sat down and took out a doughnut. “So, anyone hungry?”


“You offering?” Spike asked as he grazed Xander with a predatory look, biting viciously into a jelly filled doughnut.


“See, Buffy? He wants to eat me!” Xander wildly gestured as he said.


“There will be no eating of you. Right, Spike?” Buffy asked.


“Wouldn’t if I could. I’d rather eat you, luv.” Spike’s eyes flickered with amusement as he stifled his smirk.


Mouth hanging open, Buffy stared at his very satisfied expression when the innuendo finally got through.


“What?” Xander asked with a mouth full of food. Why did it look like he missed a point in there somewhere? Again.


Anya scoffed. “Spike was implying he wanted to give Buffy many orgasms with his oral skills. Also, Xander is mine so there will be no eating of him in any way.” She rolled her eyes at Xander’s horrified expression. “I just thought it needed to be pointed out.”


“So you’re really all…” Xander gestured at Buffy and Spike with a grimace on his face. “… together. Hot monkey love together?”


“Yeah,” Buffy said and Xander heaved a sigh.


“He will get used to it eventually,” Anya said and patted his shoulder.


Xander shrugged and said, “As long as he doesn’t turn Angelus the sequel on us—”


Spike scowled, his eyes narrowing. “I’m nothing like that broody tosser.”


“You just insulted Dead Boy,” Xander said with a twinkle in his brown eyes. “So, want to go for a beer later?”


Buffy just rolled her eyes.


******


“Mmm… more to the left… a little higher. Yes!”


Spike chuckled and continued scratching Buffy’s back through her t-shirt as she lay limp on the couch, head resting on his thighs. “This flick is bloody awful. It will rot your brain, you know?”


“Dirty Dancing is a classic.”


“Tragedy is what it is.”


“And still, I bet you know the lines by heart,” she said, grinning.


“Take that back!”


“Nope. You’re a closet chick flick fan and it’s my duty to help you overcome the shyness and openly revel in the beauty of romantic movies.”


“You’re daft.”


“And you stopped scratching. Get back to work, or you’ll see a very cranky Buffy.”


Spike resumed the motion with an amused shake of his head. “You’re a high maintenance bird, you know that?”


“Oh yes. And I know you don’t mind.”


Spike shrugged though she couldn’t see him. “You have me wrapped around your little finger, there’s no hiding that. Speaking of whipped men… please tell me the Whelp and Anya aren’t coming over tonight.”


“Why?”


“Harris keeps giving me these glances when he thinks I’m not looking.”


“He’s totally checking you out. Should I be jealous?” Buffy smothered her laugh and wriggled under his hand to point out he stopped doing his scratching duty again.


“It’s not bleeding funny. Please tell me they’re not coming!”


“You never know with those two, but not that I know of.”


“Slayer, I hate to tell you this, but your memory is terrible.”


“It is not!” She sat up. “Are you saying my memory sucks?”


Spike arched an eyebrow and grinned boyishly, obviously hoping to distract her from the mild insult.


'Silly vampire, doesn’t he know that arguing is half the fun?'


“I don’t think it was my memory that sucked something this morning,” she said out loud.


Spike tilted his head and tucked his tongue behind the front teeth. “I love it when you talk dirty.”


“You’re a bad influence on me.” Buffy crawled into his lap with a sigh and encircled Spike’s neck with her arms. “Mom called.”


“Yeah?” He gazed at her and frowned when she shifted on top of him, avoiding his eyes shyly.


“I told her.”


“What did she say? Should I be worried for my unlife?” he asked with a smirk and Buffy reprimanded him with a single glance.


“She wasn’t exactly thrilled, what with the last time I was involved with a vampire… Didn’t really end well, did it? She said she wanted me to be happy, and I told her that… that you make me happy.”


Spike reached out and twined a lock of hair around his fingers, smiling gently. “You said that?”


“Yeah. She’ll need time, but she’ll come to terms with us being together. I know Mom pretty well and she kinda likes you. She’ll have to love you once she gets to know you even better.”


“I’ll be a prefect gentleman whenever Joyce is around.” His hand snuck beneath the t-shirt Buffy was wearing and he caressed the smooth skin. “Can’t promise the same when we’re alone though.”


“Who needs a gentleman anyway?”


With a growl, Spike seized her lips in a kiss, pushing her to lie down on the couch as he covered her with his body. Spike sensuously moved his hips, drawing out a moan from her and she wriggled underneath him, hands grasping, trying to find purchase. To feel his skin. Buffy’s fingers tugged his t-shirt from the jeans and raked down his smooth back as their tongues tangled in urgent desperate need.


Forgetting where they were, Spike rolled them to the side. They tumbled to the ground with him cushioning the fall.


“Ow! Bugger.”


Buffy laughed against his neck as she tried to calm down her breathing and sat up, straddling him.


“Now that you got me here all helpless as a kitten, what are you planning on doing to me, Slayer?”


Buffy smiled slyly and slid her hands down his chest, drinking in the half lidded gaze he was giving her. She wriggled and grinned as his eyes closed and fingers clutched at her hips to ground her against him. His lips were parted and she couldn’t resist leaning down and whispering, “I have to go on patrol.”


Spike groaned and glanced up at her pitifully. “Now?”


“You’ve already distracted me as it is. Just one quick sweep and then we can go back to…” She left him to figure out the rest and at Spike’s devious look, she started to regret her teasing. Now she really wanted to stay and enjoy some Spike kisses.


“We’ll make it quick,” he said.


“There’s nothing quick about doing… stuff with you.”


“I was talking about patrol. What ever were you talking about, luv?” Spike wriggled his eyebrows and laughed at her blush as she rose to her feet.


“Yes! Me too.” She helped him to his feet and went to gather some weapons. “Obviously.”


“So, let’s go. Move your bitable arse, we’ve got some demon slaying to do. Present company excluded of course,” he said with a grin.


******


“Would you stop fidgeting? I have to concentrate,” Buffy said and gripped her stake as she glanced around.


“Can’t snog you, can’t shag you against a crypt and now I can’t even play with my lighter.” Spike pouted. “I’m bored.”


“I only slew one measly fledgling. It’s making me all… I swear they all went on vacation,” she muttered. “And I didn’t say you couldn’t kiss me, but you chose to grope me right when that elderly lady was passing by. Coincidence? I think not.”


Spike smirked and stuck the lighter into the pocket of his jeans as he swaggered to Buffy’s side. “We could do one more sweep if you want.”


Buffy sighed and tucked the stake behind Spike’s waistband before she hugged him, inconspicuously inhaling his scent. “Nah. It’s dead here. And not in the good way either.”


“Wanna go to Bronze? Have some drink… dance for a bit?” Spike asked and intertwined his fingers with hers as they started to walk.


“Okay.”


******


“Wow, almost as dead as in the cemetery,” Buffy commented as she took in the half empty Bronze. A few people swayed to the music wafting from the speakers while others lounged around.


“I like it better this way. Makes me feel less… anxious. Also, no idiots stumbling around, ready to douse you in beer.”


“Anxious?” Buffy furrowed her brow then her eyes widened in understanding. “Oh.”


“Yeah. ‘S not easy, you know. To hear all the blood pumping and be unable to do a lick about it.”


Buffy followed him to an empty couch and sat down stiffly next to him. “Do you…?” She shook her head. “Forget it.”


“No. What did you want to ask? If I missed it? Maiming and torturing of innocents?”


“That’s not what I… yeah.” Looking down at her lap proved to be much easier than focusing on his eyes.


“I’m not gonna lie. I hate the pig swill I’m forced to drink. Would trade it for human blood in a heartbeat.”


Buffy sprang to her feet, ready to storm out when he grasped her wrist.


“Would you let me finish?” he asked and after a moment of hesitation, Buffy sat down again, facing him.


“I’m not ashamed of what I am. You know that. But… if I had to choose… getting back to the vamp I was before they shoved the chip up my brain and being with you… I’d choose you. I’m not saying I won’t do a wrong bloody choice in the future, because we both know I have a penchant for getting myself into trouble, but I can promise you one thing, Buffy. I’ll never hurt you. Ever.”


Spike reached out and ran his hand through her hair then gently cupped her cheek. “I love you.”


“I-I know. It’s just… if the chip stops working…” She let the rest of the sentence hang between them, a thick barrier of fear and uncertainty and his hand slipped away.


“I’m not gonna go on a killing spree, luv. It wouldn’t be worth losing you.” Spike leaned in and whispered into her ear, “Can you trust me?”


Her heart was pounding against her chest as her lips parted to answer his question. “I do.”


Spike leaned away far enough to gaze into her eyes.


“That’s what scares me the most,” Buffy said.


“You don’t have to be scared,” he said, his voice quiet but filled with the intensity of his conviction as he intertwined his fingers with hers and stood up. “Dance with me?”


“Always.”


TBC

Author's note: Last one will be posted by the end of this week, muchachas and muchachos (if there are some lol). Also, is it nice to make jokes about eating someone?? :P