IN THE INTERREGNUM-

Spike understood the impulse, completely. She wanted to atone and make all that she knew would come after mean something. That was the only thing she was thinking, anything else didn’t matter.

He knew how that felt, and that tempered his ire as he looked into the anxious eyes of his wife, “How did it go?” Buffy asked.

“Red wasn’t expecting me. She was expecting something entirely different. Called me the ‘White rabbit.’ It’s a good wager she wasn’t ready for me. But then she never did learn to harness her powers. I did find out something interesting.”

“Oh, really?” Buffy could see from the look in his eyes that Spike had somehow stumbled onto what she had done, “What did you find out?”

Spike knew he should have been angry. He should have been livid, in fact. But he just couldn’t do it, not when it was the sort of thing he would have done. How could he be angry when he was doing the same thing himself? He sighed and kissed her, moaning a little at the trepidation he tasted on her lips, “I wanted to keep you and Joni away from that. I remember what it was like before that amulet found its way to Wolfram and Hart. It was enough that I had that burden. I didn’t want you to know that pain, too. But I should have known better than to try and keep that from you.”

Buffy bit her lip as she watched the miasma of emotions swirl in his gaze, “Did you tell her, Spike?”

He lowered his head like an injured pup, “Yes. But something in the way she looked at me told me she already knew,” he looked at her with a soft, knowing eye, “You and I both know there’s only one way that could have happened,” the look on Buffy’s face told him what he needed to know. Her face told him she carried enough guilt. He didn’t need to add more. What she needed from him was mercy, not wrath, “Your Mum and I aren’t the only ones who’ve been giving previews of coming apocalypses, are we?” he asked gently.

“Spike,” Buffy breathed, “ it’s the only way she can help him. She had to know. I…had to know. I couldn’t let you go through that alone. Not again. If we want a chance of beating this, then she had to know. Maybe not first-hand…”

Spike tightened his grip on Buffy, hoping to shield her from even having to speak the words, “Thank God for that!” he breathed.

“…But she had to know. It was the only way I knew…to help you.”

“I understand,” he said softly, “There’s no way I like the idea of putting her, or you through that, but I understand,” he smirked as he patted her shoulder lovingly, “And, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”

Buffy eyed him suspiciously, “Spike, what…?”

“Buffy, the first time Angelus tried to take her, she and I were in that place for a year,” he hated the look of fright in her eyes, “ Out where you were, Love, our baby was only gone a few hours. And now, because of Angelus’s guilty conscience, we’ve gone way beyond that benchmark.”

“The first time? This has happened before?” she saw the look of contrition that pulled his eyes downward, “Are you telling me, that after all we’ve done…all you’ve been through, we’re still not changing anything?” she was clearly devastated.

Spike tried to soothe Buffy’s nerves in light of this new knowledge, “We are changing things, Love,” he said tenderly, “But all the possibilities have to be in play, as they were before. If it’s not this way, he could bring Joni back and lose you.”

“I thought this was a new wrinkle, Spike,” Buffy gasped, “It’s not. I should know this, even here. I should know. How could you not tell me that he kidnapped our daughter? How could you not tell me what you’d been through?”

“I know you were very ill by then. I didn’t tell you. You had enough of a burden. I couldn’t do that to you.”

“But how could you not tell me, Spike?” he hated seeing the flash of tears in her eyes, “How could I not know?”

“Love, you were feverish. Telling you would have put your body under undue stress, and ‘Lace’ would have taken you from me faster. I wanted to have you as long as I could,” he averted her blazing stare, “I know it was selfish of me. You have no idea how much I want the fog of ignorance now. That place was a terror. I don’t even want to remember it.”

“But, someone should have told me after…when I came here. Why didn’t I know?”

A sad smirk played on his lips, “Habit? Those people who thought they were doing the right thing by keeping certain things from you before, because they loved you, did it here because they love you. You know people don’t change here, neither does their love for you. For better or worse, it was done because they love you, Buffy.”

Buffy shook her head, “That doesn’t make it right, Spike!”

“You’re right,” he nodded, “It doesn’t make it right,” he brushed his lips lightly over hers. It was an apology as well as an affirmation of his love for her, “But Buffy, if you had known, would you have been able to change anything? Would it have helped you, in any way, to know that, and not be able to change it?”

“No,” Buffy admitted, “But I could have helped you. Does Jonina remember?”

“Now?” he saw her nod and continued, softly, “Only bits and pieces from before. Not the pain though. And she won’t remember it now. That was part of the deal.”

“What deal, Spike?”

“Don’t worry, Love, I’ll take care of her, and him too. She will have everything she needs. Nothing too extravagant, I promise. But she will have enough to eat, shelter, clothes to wear and someone to protect her. I’ll even make sure she has that floppy-eared bunny she loved so much.”

The conviction in his voice made Buffy proud and dampened her anger. He was only doing what he was best at, protecting the people he loved.

She pondered how alike they really were, and was in awe. But, there was one flaw in his plan, “Um, Spike,” she asked his back as he walked away, “just how are you going to explain a cabin, let alone a stuffed toy, in the middle of…well…nowhere?”

Spike turned to face her, and shrugged as his feet still glided away from her, “Love,” he smirked, “there are many mysteries in the universe. Believe me when I tell you, what he’s imagining is worse than the small paradox of a stuffed toy,” he shook his head sadly, “Love, there are worse things than some creature comforts. I’m a bit of a paradox myself. And we both know how much you love a paradox. Tell you what though,” he smiled again, “ when you can get someone in charge to explain the platypus to me, then I’ll explain a cabin in the middle of that place. Until then,” he winked, his eyes glinting with mischief as he shrugged, “divine intervention good for you?”

Buffy laughed as he walked away, “Oh, Spike, I love you.”
*****************************************

NOVEMBER 17, 2005-ROME

Dawn was confused by the results of this test. Stephen Riley’s blood did have the antibodies that her niece’s had, but when she tested it against the isolated virus from Talitha Sands’s blood sample, it weakened the virus but didn’t kill it. It was the same with the sample from Faith and Astrid.

She took the slide out of the stage clips of her microscope. True, the Council had access to the most state-of-the-art equipment. But no computer could sense the nuances that the human eye could detect.

Dawn pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to clear her vision. She was exhausted. She knew the answers were here. She was just too tired to see them, “Fred,” she called wearily, “run that serum test again on Jonina’s sample, would you? The answer’s got to be there somewhere.”

Illyria took the last vial of the child’s blood from the cold storage unit, “ As you wish. But the sample is greatly depleted. There may not be enough quantity for another test.”

“I know,” Dawn sighed, “Just, whatever you do, don’t spill any of it. It’s all we’ve got.”
**************************************************

In the beginning, his existence was full of darkness. This was a wilderness that he had to tame, for her sake. His world was a constant state of alert. The oasis of the old man’s cabin gave them shelter, but there were still the things on the outside that threatened her.

Things like the Zazlak had ignored his warning growls. The thing was a predator that had caught the scent of something new in its environment. Something it saw as small and weak, an easy meal.

That was its first, and last, mistake.

It came one night, when the snows first began to fly. He’d sensed it before he’d seen it.

He woke when the beast inside warned him of danger. He scanned the floor at the foot of his sleeping place, and found her safe in her basket, sleeping like the angel she was.

When he was sure that his youngling was safe and hidden from the threat, he left to pursue it. He had to leave his youngling behind, so that he would have a reason to return. He wouldn’t leave her for long, but he had to take out the things that were a danger. That was what he existed for.

In the third hour of his search, he came upon its nest. It wasn’t difficult to find. This beast was not discrete about its kills. Left them out in the open as a warning to the other beasts to stay away.

The Zazlak was the largest of the predators. It was at least twice his size, and very strong. It commanded respect from all the other beasts. If it were possible for him to kill this beast, his status among the animals would be elevated, and nothing else would dare to threaten his youngling.

As he crept into the lair, he could hear the roar of the thing’s breath. The urge to flee was nearly overwhelming. To quell his fear, he held his javelin tighter in his grip. If his aim were true, there would be no question what was ruler here.

The beast was asleep. Its black and green scales wound lazily around the fire pit of its cave. The snowfall forced the poisonous reptile to seek warmth. This was to his advantage. If he stayed near the mouth of the lair, the Zazlak would be forced into the raw elements. Although the cold did not affect the beast inside of him, his foe was quite different. The cold made it slow and dim-witted. It was his only advantage. And he would use it, to protect his youngling.

He stood at the mouth of the lair and let his beast howl.

The Zazlak turned its red eyes to the intruder. The warmth of the cave enabled it to move swiftly, expanding to its full height of twelve feet. It straightened its wings, preparing to take flight.

In order to take to the sky, it would need to leave its lair. When it got to the mouth of the lair, it felt the sting of the javelin that had found its mark.

The Zazlak was felled.

Now, there was a new king of beasts. With a victorious growl, he took a portion of its hide as a trophy, and went back to care for his youngling.

He rushed home to her. He stood watch over her, purred at her and was comforted by the strange rumbling that echoed through him as she slept on his quiet chest.

He was calmed. As the little one slept, he sang the song from his dreams and when he did, he fell into memory and slept secure.

They would always be secure now. He knew that. His own rumblings comforted him; they made no sense to him. But making the rumblings from his dreams was the only thing he had to comfort his youngling with in this harsh reality.

Gently placing his hands at the crown of her head as she slept, he sang, “…Rest your head close to my heart, never to part, baby of mine.”
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NOVEMBER 17, 2005- LOS ANGELES

Willow had never seen Buffy this distraught, “But Buffy, Homer was a fluke. He wasn’t supposed to be here. You knew it was just temporary,” Willow placed a soothing hand on Buffy’s back, tracing gentle circles, “We’re not even sure it was really Spike you talked to,” Buffy looked at her with tormented eyes, “At least we have something to go on now. We’ve got a lead on finding him.”

“He’s gone Willow!” Buffy snapped, “What about that don’t you understand? You were here. You know what Homer said. He said that he was Spike’s scream,” she sobbed, “What if that was all he had? What if he can’t do it again, and I didn’t take it? What if I can’t find them?”

Willow’s eyes twinkled, “Buffy, we’re talking about your husband, remember? The ‘Energizer Bunny’ of vampires?” she relaxed a little seeing her friend chuckle, “If anyone can reach out to you again, it would be him. But, you’ll never find him if you collapse from stress. I’m sure he would tell you to get some rest. Get some focus, and then start again. Be the Slayer he knows you are.”

Buffy let out a cleansing breath, “Thank you, Willow. I was freaked out there for a minute.”

“No problem,” Willow said, giving Buffy a gentle hug.
****************************************

The snowy season had come to mean change for them. It was during the snowfall that the old man who sheltered him returned.

He had returned from hunting, as was his custom when his youngling slept, to find him hovering over her basket.

He took a fighting stance, and growled a warning.

The old man looked, unhurriedly, in his direction. Protective instincts were lulled by the flash of something known in the old one’s eyes; the growl was soft and unthreatening, “Easy there,” Homer cooed, “I know it’s been a long time,” he placed the baby’s rabbit in her basket with her and smiled at her excited squealing, “I’m here to help you. Jonina is old enough to have her ‘Daddy,’ not just her protector. To be her ‘Daddy’ you need to talk to me. I need to get you ready for her. For Buffy.”

The name from his dreams, “Buffy?” he intoned gruffly.

The old man nodded, “That’s right, Spike. I know Buffy.”
*****************************

He knew his name now, and his purpose. Over the years, Homer had told him what to expect. He hated doing it, but if Jonina was to survive on the outside. A little pain now would save her, and Buffy’s world later.

That is, if Homer was to be believed. And somehow, Spike believed him.

Spike sat softly on the edge of her bed and gently kissed her forehead as he watched her deep sienna eyes grow wide with fear. She knew what was coming. It had become a bleak routine for them. He knew it hurt, and the thought of causing her more pain was unthinkable.

But, what was even more unthinkable was being without her. So kissed her and tried to assuage her fears. He smiled as she brought her bunny close to her as a shield, “That’s right, Dove,” he whispered trying to distract her from the sight of the syringe, “You hold tight to old Spike Rabbit. And if it pinches the least little bit, you squeeze the stuffing out of him. That’s what he’s there for,” he winked at her as he slid the needle into her skin, “That’s his job, to protect you. He and I, we kind of love you. We don’t want to see you ill,” he placed the syringe in the medical waste container, “See? All done,” Spike said as he tucked her into bed, “Now where were we?” he asked as he settled into the seat next to her bed.

The brief pain of the needle seemed to wash away on a tide of youthful excitement as she reminded him just where he’d left off in the fairytale, “The evil Glory monster had the Prince in her dungeon and was going to make him tell her where the Magic Key was,” she said in a breathless voice.

She looked, and sounded, as if she were the happiest child on earth. And Spike wanted to keep her that way, “That’s right,” he smiled, “I remember now.”
***************************************

After Buffy had rested, she woke with a new verve. She knew where to go, what to do. She didn’t know how she knew, but she did.

It must have been that dream she had. From what she could remember, she was standing in the park that she married Spike in, watching a young girl walk into the center of a chasm of light.

Buffy didn’t know what it meant, but she understood that that was where she needed to go. She needed to go back to where this all started.

With Willow’s spell book at her side, Buffy left the DeSoto near the gazebo, and walked slowly toward the point where he was.

She lit the candles, said the incantation, and watched as the light grew in front of her. She closed her eyes and thought of Spike.
****************************

Jonina ran to the spot where the star fell. The light was really bright, and her Daddy said she could make wishes on stars that fell on the ground. She wished she was bigger. Her legs weren’t fast enough. If she got there and the star had faded, she wouldn’t get her wish.

The star was just over the hill, only when she got to where the star had fallen, it wasn’t a star anymore. It was a lady.

Joni looked closer. The lady was sleeping. And, this wasn’t just a lady. Joni knew who this sleeping lady was. This was someone special. This was the Princess.

Joni didn’t know what to do. But her Daddy would. As fast as her little legs could go, she ran home to her Daddy.
*****************************

Spike could hear her little heart hammering in her chest as she ran to the door. Her little hand beat against the wood, as if the loud tapping in her chest weren’t jarring enough. He opened the door and was horrified at her flushed face.

“Daddy, Daddy,” she gasped, trying to pull air quickly.

He knelt, his beast ready to fight for her, “Dove, what is it?” he searched the darkness but felt no threat. He did feel something old though. Something out of his dreams, “Is something after you?”

“No,” Joni huffed, grasping her Daddy’s hand and pulling him out into the dark, “I found the Princess, Daddy! You have to come. I think she’s sleeping. You have to wake her up,” she tugged harder at his hand, “Come on, Daddy!”

Something connected with his heart, and Spike felt his feet rapidly speeding him to her side.
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