Epilogue



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“You can do this,” she whispered to herself, taking a calming breath.

“You can,” Spike reassured her, stepping closer and resting his hands on her arms, “And I’m right here with you.”

She took a moment to enjoy the comfort of his touch, leaning into him and smiling when he pressed a kiss to her forehead. It had been over a week now and she didn’t think this feeling of elation was ever going to go away.

“Time to be brave,” he murmured and she pulled away reluctantly.

She nodded determinedly and turned towards the door, squaring her shoulders and lifting her chin. She made her way over to the door and paused for a second at it before opening the door and stepping out into the shop. Her friends looked up at her entrance and smiled or waved in greeting but soon went back to what they were doing and her courage began to disappear.

“M’right here,” Spike murmured, his hand on her arm, supporting her almost.

She turned and gave him a worried glance and then turned back to her friends and swallowed hard. Xander looked up at the moment and frowned when he saw she had barely moved from her position.

“Everything alright, Buff?”

A subtle push from Spike had her in motion and she moved towards the table, stopping in front of her friends – all of them watching her curiously now.



“I wanted to talk to you guys. About the way I’ve been lately. I guess I… I wanted to explain why I haven’t been myself.”

“It’s okay, Buff,” Xander soothed, giving her a crooked smile, “We get it. Readjusting and all that.”

“Yeah,” she murmured uncertainly and sent another glance in Spike’s direction, seeking his silent support. He gave her an encouraging smile when she met his gaze and with another calming breath, she turned back to her friends.

“I have been readjusting, like you said. But not… not quite in the way you think.”

Her friends were all watching her intently now and it took all of the bravery she possessed to continue.

“I… It’s time you knew the truth.”

She sent another quick look in Spike’s direction for reassurance and forced herself onwards.

“I know… you thought I was in a hell dimension being tortured so you brought me back… rescued me…”

She trailed off painfully but forced herself on after only a moment’s pause.

“But… the thing is… you didn’t.”

She heard a tiny gasp and it drew her attention to Willow, whose expression was one of dawning horror – prompting her to continue quickly, to get it all out.

“I wasn’t in Hell,” she got out quietly, “I… I was in Heaven.”



The silence that followed her words was deafening and she bit her trembling lip as her eyes took in the various states of shock and horror exhibited on her friends’ faces. Willow was openly crying and despite her one-time anger at her friend, she could not help feeling bad for the pain she had caused her.

“You didn’t know,” she murmured, attention fixed on Willow, “It… it’s okay.”

Willow raised her tearstained face and met her gaze with one of complete self-hatred.

“Buffy, you…”

Xander couldn’t finish his choked sentence and she turned to him with a painful smile.

“I was in Heaven,” she said softly, “I was… at peace.”

A look at Spike and she forced herself back to her friends.

“That’s why I haven’t been the same. I’m… I’m still trying to figure it all out.”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Dawn asked, her voice thick with emotion.

“I know I should have,” she admitted, meeting her sister’s pained gaze, “But I was afraid. And I… I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“You should have told us,” Dawn accused, “We… we were always saying how bad things must have been and we were talking rubbish.”

“Dawnie, it’s okay,” she soothed, moving over to her sister and taking her by the arms, “I’m okay.”

“But you were hurting… that’s why you were so miserable.”

She sighed and tucked her sister’s long hair behind her ear, knowing there was no use trying to deny what was true.

“I’m not now,” she said, “I’m learning to live again… to enjoy living.”



Wrapping an arm around Dawn, she turned to address her friends.

“And it’s because of all of you. I don’t know what I would have done without any of you.”

Her eyes fell on Spike and she held his gaze for a long moment, letting him know that this message was for him more than any of the others. For he had been her rock, her confidante when she had despaired of ever feeling human again. And with him by her side, she was returning to something of her old self in leaps and bounds.

She was changed – they all were – but thanks to his constant love, she was feeling more and more normal by the day. She smiled at him softly and finally directed her attention back to her friends. Willow was still weeping silently but she looked up at Buffy and forced herself to her feet. She staggered forward and then hugged Buffy tightly.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

Fighting her own emotions back, she held her friend tightly and nodded jerkily.

“It’s okay.”

Shaking her head in protest, Willow pulled back, her lip quavering as she held back her sobs.

“It was all my fault. I was the one who forced the others to agree… the one who did the spell.”

“It doesn’t matter,” she stated, trying to soothe her friend, “It’s done but it’s in the past and we… we need to move on. I need to move on.”

She stepped back from her friend and took in every beloved face around her.

“It wasn’t easy… isn’t easy… but I’m happy now. And I know I still have something to live for. So I’m… I’m okay.”

With a shaky smile, she moved to perch on the arm of the chair Spike was sitting on, unable to stay away from him for much longer. As soon as she sat down, he wrapped an arm loosely around her back, his touch more comforting than anything else.

“I’m in love,” she continued, with a smile at the vampire beside her, “And I’ve got the best friends in the world. What more could I want?”

She smiled brightly and for the first time in what seemed like ages, she felt a burst of love and emotion so strong it encompassed her – telling her that she really, truly, was alive once more.


THE END


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So... the challenge....

Post "Life Serial", a bad thunderstorm pounds California, especially Sunnydale. The roads are flooded,and all the Scoobies and Spike are stranded at the Summers house. Spike and Buffy keep sneaking off together to talk, and Buffy ends up realizing she's in love with him.

Requirements:

Dawn, Anya, Willow and Tara notice that Spuffy keep sneaking off.

Buffy and Spike sleep together during one of
their "talks".

Everyone in the house hears them.

Buffy realizes she's in love with Spike after they get caught.

Xander's okay with the relationship.

Dawn tells Spike and Buffy she is traumatized because the "noises" won't go away.

Xander convinces Buffy to admit her feelings to Spike.


Bonuses:

Everyone is stuck in the house for three days.

Warren, Jonathan and Andrew try to attack while Buffy's guard is down, but Warren and Jonathan drown

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8 out of 9. Not bad for my first ever challenge response, methinks. (And I hope Lynn agrees!!) I hope you enjoyed...