Chapter 18



Spike couldn’t stop pacing. He was so close to being back where he belonged, so close to leaving behind the only two people who ever really showed him how it was to be loved, and the Immortal was prolonging his agony.


“Bloody hell! Will you sit down already?” William was sure he’d be seasick if it weren’t for his vampire constitution.


“Yes, Spike, do sit down.” Adalberto’s distaste couldn’t be hidden by his cultured manners. “You will all be on your merry way as soon as we are clear on a few matters.”


The younger vampire just shook his head and continued going up and down the length of the living room.


“Spike. Sit.” Buffy had had enough, and didn’t even get to fully enjoy the fact that Spike sat on the floor the moment she barked her command. “You—” she turned to the Immortal, “On with it.”


“All I need is for you to agree in front of your lovers to be mine for a year after your return.” The look on his face was that of the cat that swallowed the canary.


Buffy wanted clarification for clarification’s sake. “You won’t try to use me as a weapon?”


“I swear I shall not.” The temptation to rub the vampires’ faces in his victory was overwhelming, so he went on. “I shall, however, use you in every other possible way, and you will not deny me anything that is not related to your Slayer abilities.”


Low growls answered him, but Buffy’s voice sounded loud and clear over them. “What command I—solely—have of myself I’ll give to you upon my return.” She could hardly contain a cheeky grin as she added, “Pinky swear.”


If the Immortal wasn’t a self important bastard, he would have realized her carefully worded promise meant nothing. He was one, however, so with a satisfied smile he murmured something under his breath and all three blonds disappeared from his living room in a flash of light.


Sofia, standing behind him, didn’t even flinch in her effort to hide her thoughts. “I am sure my Master has reason to celebrate tonight. Should I go to town and get provisions for your favourite meals?”



~~~~~*~~~~~



Buffy was dizzy, her stomach upset with the sensation of suddenly lifting off then being hurled forward, only to reach a screeching halt. Trying to clear her head by shaking it only felt like her brain was dislodged and rolling around her skull, so she remained still, huddled in the fetal position, until the world around her stopped spinning.


It might have been a moment or a century—she hoped for the first with all her heart—before she could open her eyes and take in her surroundings. She was on a dirt floor, in a dark place. A place that felt and smelt like a tomb. William was bending down to help her up when she realized the exact point in time and space they were at. “Oh, no. Spike, don’t…”


It was too late to tell him not to look beyond the pillar he stood behind. Too late to save him the heartache.


“I see some things never change,” was his simple statement, as he looked down at the other Buffy and Angel kissing.


Some things obviously did, however.


William and Buffy were on Spike’s side in time to see the other Slayer push Angel so hard, the tall, broody vampire flew backwards and landed on his ass, unmoving.


“I’ve told you, we’re over. God!”


William—not Spike—was the one who couldn’t help himself and cheered.


Other-Buffy, that was how Buffy had secretly named her, looked up, her face immediately becoming a mask of hate. “You can now appear as three people?” she asked. “Great choices.”


Spike immediately caught up to what she thought was happening. “We’re not The First, luv,” he yelled, taking no step closer. He was grinning from ear to ear at how she’d responded to his Sire’s affections, but knew he was far from being in her good graces.


“Right.”


Her voice sounded at once resigned and determined. An odd mixture that sent an arrow of pain through Buffy’s heart. She knew what her other self was feeling. Nothing. She felt empty, because she hadn’t had Spike to take the brunt of her hate for herself. A lone tear made its way down her cheek at other-Buffy’s next words.


“So you’re not here to scold me for losing both Spike and myself?” She snorted. “Although two of him may be a bit much…”


William had been silent since voicing his approval over the Slayer that wasn’t his own rendering Angel unconscious, but felt he had to say something now. “Priest is alive. Finish him off and we’ll talk.”


Slayer instincts were still strong inside her. She span on her heel just as Caleb was getting back on his feet, and with a scoop motion grabbed the Scythe and ran it through him, effectively splitting him in half.


“Can we come down now or will we meet his end?” Spike asked, his entire being longing to run to her and take her in his arms.


“Still not convinced you’re not The First,” other-Buffy said. “Not that you could hurt me if you were.”


“Here’s a good will gesture, then,” William offered and punched Spike in the nose. “He wouldn’t bleed if he were The First, right?”


“Oi, you wanker!”


Buffy silenced her lover and looked at her alternate universe version. “Convinced?”


Other-Buffy shrugged. “Keep a safe distance.”


The three approached reluctantly, scared by the indifference in other-Buffy’s eyes more than by the instrument of death in her hands. Each was trying to measure her, see the damage done to her by not having Spike around. Nothing was more telling of that damage than the empty look in her eyes.


Buffy almost reached out but thought better of it. Time was running short, and they were there for a reason. Her lovers had agreed to let her do the talking, so she tried to start somewhere. “We’re from the future.” She corrected herself. “Well, William and I are from the future. Spike—” she pointed at the younger vampire. “Spike is your Spike. A spell pulled him from—”


“I would never have left you of my own free will, Kitten. Never,” Spike chimed in pleadingly. He thought he saw a little chink in her armour at that, a spark that showed his Buffy was alive in that shell of a Slayer in front of him. “I love you, Buffy. That could never change.” His declaration of love had the opposite effect than what he expected, as her expression turned stony again.


“He really wouldn’t,” Buffy reassured her.


Other-Buffy completely ignored her. “I can believe you’re really you.” She indicated the two vampires. “I can feel the tinglies. I can even believe you’re from the future, cuz hey! Nothing makes much sense in Slayer life, why should this? What I can’t believe is that you come here one day before the Apocalypse to… what? Tell me Spike loves me?” She turned to him. “I don’t need this, Spike. I don’t need to hear about your pathetic feelings.”


“Can you not be such a bitch?” William snarled. “We’re here to save you, so give us a bloody break!”


She snapped. “You come here all Marty McFly, to tell me what to do? I know what to do, vampire.”


Buffy squeezed her mate’s hand, sending him calming thoughts. “Please hear me out. We don’t have time.” Taking the curt nod her younger self gave her as an indication she should go on, she did just that. “Angel has an amulet with him, one that’s supposed to be worn by someone more than human, but with a soul. In my time-line William did that.”


Other-Buffy frowned in confusion.


Tightening her grip on her mate’s hand once more, Buffy explained. “William did something bad, a bit after when you last saw Spike. Something he felt he had to atone for. He went to Africa and went through some horrible tests to get his soul back. For me.” Her voice broke and William let go of her hand to wrap an arm around her shoulders. “He—he burned in the Apocalypse, and his soul got trapped in the amulet. The thingy ended up in LA, Angel’s firm, and Spike stayed there and faced another Apocalypse, one only he survived. I didn’t know he was alive after Sunnydale, I felt lost. I made a wish…” She looked at the other blonde apologetically. “I didn’t mean to end up with two, to take him from you. I just realized I needed him. I loved him.” Locking eyes with other-Buffy, she added, “Like you do.”


“I couldn’t—I don’t.” Other-Buffy’s voice was steely, but her lower lip trembled perceptibly.


“You do, but you won’t find out until it’s too late.” Buffy looked down, taking a deep breath. “That’s not why we’re here. We can’t convince you to see something you don’t want to. Just… don’t let Angel wear the amulet. It won’t let him be there for the LA hell-invasion. You wear it.”


“Me?” An eyebrow arched, and Spike saw the eyes he loved look at him with contempt. “Guess my version couldn’t get a soul, huh?”


It wasn’t fair. He’d been through all that shit and she would never see him as the man he was. He envied William the happiness he had. “Got somethin’ else, but can’t wear the Elizabeth Taylor paraphernalia,” he said trying to sound flippant. “I can still help.”


“I don’t need your help. I don’t need you, and I could never love you, Spike. Now if you want a round of the nasty before tomorrow’s fight, something to take the edge off, we could figure something out.” The words dripped malice, but all three knew where she was coming from.


“Don’t turn into Faith,” Buffy advised. “Even Faith isn’t Faith anymore. She’s about to be a mother where I’m from, and where are you?”


William interjected. “The reason I never could beat you—her—is that you’re more than just the Slayer. It was always the human part of you, the one with family and friends, that never let me take the upper hand. You were always fighting for something much more concrete than the general welfare. I’m sorry you’ve lost that.”


If looks could kill, other-Buffy’s glare would be driving a stake right through William’s heart. “Don’t you dare be sorry for me. I don’t need your pity.”


“You need somethin’ to remind you of who you are, luv. Somethin’ to care about, and someone to care about you,” Spike said softly.


“When you don’t care you don’t get hurt,” she mumbled before adding in a louder tone, “You left me,” she spat out. “After all you said, it was only sex to you. I told you you couldn’t fuck me any more and you left me!”


“Not because I wanted to, you silly bint.” He felt exasperated; the fear he wouldn’t get through to her slowly turning into reality. “It was never just sex for me. I just wanted to give you what you needed.”


Seeing things about to escalate to something entirely counterproductive, Buffy asked for a couple of minutes alone with the younger version of her. It was evident neither vampire was particularly happy about that, but Angel started stirring, and the two hightailed it out of the tomb before they had to waste time dealing with his accusations.


The moment Spike and William left, Buffy turned to other-Buffy and demanded, “You have to admit Spike was the best sex you ever had.”


Taken aback, the other blonde started saying something about how that was completely irrelevant to whether he could be trusted, but Buffy cut in.


“He can be so much more if you just let him.” She sighed at the stubborn look she received, knowing full well she’d driven several people mad with that stubbornness. “Listen, you’re going to win tomorrow’s fight, partly because of Spike. In my reality, it was almost wholly because of him. After that, however, you’ll have to face life, Buffy.” Calling her with her own name was hard, but she needed to reach the little frightened girl inside. “Everyone else, everyone you know and love, will get on with their lives. They’ll fall in love, have families… Where will you be?” She silenced an objection the other was about to make, by raising her hand. “Let me finish. You want to be normal, but your normal—my normal—isn’t the same as that of others. How can you ever be satisfied by someone whom you’ll have to try not to hurt in bed? What man will like being with a woman who’ll have to protect him? Spike’s your equal, can’t you see?”


“I can’t deal with this. I have a fight to get ready for.” The other blonde turned towards Angel who was sitting up and blinking slowly in an effort to make sense of what he was seeing. “Gimme the thingy,” she ordered.


Stomping her foot, Buffy called out, “There will be fights every day, but your life will be passing you by in the meantime. Open your heart to Spike, trust him. Let him show you what love is about. I know I will never regret being mated to William.” She hadn’t mean to blurt out the last part, but as other-Buffy’s head snapped to her direction and Angel cried out she was nuts, Buffy felt the tugging sensation in the pit of her stomach and disappeared in front of their disbelieving eyes.


Spike strolled into the tomb moments later, and other-Buffy had to threaten to knock Angel out again to keep the darker vampire from lunging at him. “Will you chill and give me what you came to give me?” she asked. “And make it fast. You’re not the only vampire I plan to get rid of tonight.”


Brooding, Angel kept on the silent treatment while handing her the amulet and dragging his feet away. When he was at the entrance of the tomb, he said, “You can’t trust him, Buffy.”


Turning to Spike, she replied, “I know.” She sounded sad, her older self’s words having penetrated her walls, despite appearances. She didn’t want to carry the weight of her Calling alone—didn’t want to live her life alone—but she had to. She could trust nobody but herself, least of all Spike.


Still, it was hard not to feel her resolve waver when he leered and said, “Well, too bad, Slayer. See, you’re stuck with me!”


She sidestepped him on her way out, but could feel his proximity as he followed her.


“Stayed in your basement last time around. There was cuddlin’ involved.”


“Go away, Spike.”


“Never again.”


His promise made her smile despite herself. “Basement. No cuddling. Any funny business with the Slayerettes and you’re dust.”



~~~~~*~~~~~


The jet-lag didn’t last as long this time, mostly because of the feel of cool stone against her back and cool metal around her wrists.


Buffy opened her eyes to darkness. She tried moving, but her wrists and ankles were shackled.


“William!” she called out as loud as she could, but the only sound that came back to her was the echo of her own voice.


*Where the fuck are you?*




Tbc.