“Buffy?"

Spike hesitantly knelt down next to the huddled girl. Once she had realised what Dracula had made her into, the small blonde had leapt from the bed and hidden in the far corner of the room. She sat there rocking back and forth, big fat tears pouring down her face, as the memories of her turning and everything that followed flooded back to her. Spike reached over and tentatively stroked her hair; he hated seeing the usually strong warrioress he had fought against and with over the years reduced to a weeping bundle.

"I need a bath,” she muttered. "Feel dirty." Buffy sniffled pathetically and wiped her face with her hands.

"Okay, pet. Come on, I'll show you where the tub is." Spike reached over and took one of her hands and pulled her tenderly to her feet. "You sure you need another bath?"

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Umm… well… nothing." Spike realised that she may not appreciate him having seen her bits and pieces. He rubbed the back of his head, amazed at the feeling of embarrassment that flooded him. ‘I’m evil! Wot the ruddy hell am I feeling bad about…’ He looked up at Buffy and realised that when it came to the small woman in front of him, he couldn’t count on not feeling. She evoked a barrage of emotions - some old, and some new and delicate. He fervently hoped that the feelings of love and affection wouldn’t diminish.

They felt good and made him feel alive.

He stared down at his Childe - amazed how much had changed so quickly -and silently vowed never to let her down.

Buffy glanced down at her sleeping clothes; her hand went to her damp curling hair as realisation dawned on her. "You gave me a bath?" Her voice rose in embarrassment.

Spike jerked his head down and suddenly found his toes very interesting.

A small hand reached up and cupped his chin, forcing him to face her. "Spike, did you give me a bath?" Buffy briefly wondered why the idea of Spike seeing her naked didn't bother her, instead it warmed her and filled her with a riot of emotions and feelings that puzzled her and at the same time excited her. Buffy pushed all these jumbled emotions aside and trusting her instincts decided to let Spike look after her.

Spike nodded as he pushed open the door. "I just wanted to help. Didn't want that bastard's touch on you..." he trailed off unwilling to mention that he knew she and Dracula had been intimate.

"Spike, could…did you smell…oh god, this is humiliating." Buffy would have been blushing if she could. "If you did it's okay, and thank you for getting rid of, well, you know..."

Spike nodded jerkily. "Here, there's a few bubbly things for your soak, towels and soap. I'll just let you be?" He led her to the bathroom and hovered shyly at the door.

Buffy shook her head. "Can you stay?" She was amazed at her lack of modesty. This was her biggest enemy and here she was asking him to stay and watch over her in the tub. Buffy shook her head at the strange turn of events.

Spike gulped. "Do what?"

"I feel safe when you're around." Buffy whispered. She felt needy and scared. It was Spike’s presence that offered her a sense of safety and calm. Buffy was bewildered by this but at the same time accepted it. Instinctively, the newly turned vampire knew her Sire would protect her.

"Then I'll stay right here with you, Pet." Spike bowed gallantly. He was completely confused by the total change of attitude Buffy was showing and the ease in which he accepted it. He had expected a stake through the heart or at the very least a thump on the nose followed by her rapid exit. Spike had thought that the diminutive woman huddled in his bathtub would have been the same self-possessed Slayer he had fought against and with over the years and would have left him for her Scoobies without a backwards glance. Instead she was turning to him for comfort and love, just like any newly fledged Childe. He was bewildered but elated…

Buffy filled the tub with bubble bath and water and she stripped off. Smiling at Spike turning his back, she rolled her eyes at his sudden bashfulness. Slipping off the t-shirt, Buffy stepped into the tub and sank in up to her chin. "You can turn around now."

Spike stood for a second, the muscles in his back tense, his hands clenched into fists. Sighing he turned, his eyes lighting up at the sight of Buffy's face peering back at him, the bubbles covered her body completely.

He sank to his knees by the bath. "Shall I get a cool flannel for your eyes?"

"Thank you," Buffy dipped under the water and resurfaced.

"Here." Spike handed the flannel to her and watched as she patted it under her eyes. His finger’s twitched and he suppressed the urge to snatch it from her hand and bath her face for her. Spike’s awe-filled gaze never wavered from her eyes until Buffy closed them and he glanced down at her soft lips. Spike took an un-needed breath and he reached out tentatively and finally let his fingers curve against her cheek and he sighed happily as she pressed her face into his hand. Spike revelled in the sensation of her soft cool skin.

Her hand slid under the water and pressed against her chest, trying to find a heartbeat. "It's so quiet,” she whispered.

"What is, Pet?"

"Everything. I can't hear my heart. I'm dead."

"I know. But hey, you're still pretty," he offered lamely.

"Help me?" Buffy's plaintiff plea warmed Spike's heart.

"I will, Pet. Anything you want." He promised.

"How did you get me away from him?"

Spike sighed; he had hoped to avoid this conversation. But he knew that his Slayer was nothing if not stubborn and if he didn’t answer he might/would get bopped on the nose for his troubles. A small wet hand appeared over the lip off the tub; Spike took it and gently squeezed it. His cockney accent dropped away and smoothed into his long forgotten cultured tones as he explained to Buffy how he had managed to rescue her from Dracula's clutches.

She remained silent throughout the entire story. Her mind filled with images of Venice; Dracula, Spike and their adventures in the Italian city. His voice was soothing and as he trailed off, they both sat there holding each other’s hands.

*********

With a shudder Buffy recalled initially rejecting Dracula’s advances, which led to him hitting her. She remembered fighting him tooth and nail, until he restrained her. Then his eyes had glowed and she succumbed to his touch- even welcomed it.

Buffy tried to suppress the memories of being a willing participant in Dracula's seduction, but failed. She rubbed her thighs together at the memory of her erstwhile Sire's tongue exploring and tasting her soft folds as she lay back keening her joy. She could feel herself opening her legs and guiding Dracula's erection into her and could recall her sighs of satisfaction as he pounded into her over and over. What she didn't understand was why she had let him rather than fighting him off. She could also feel the other Brides touching her and caressing her, that was when she had struggled and fought, until Dracula caught her chin in his hands and forced her to gaze again into his hypnotic eyes.

"He had you under his control, some sorta gyspy nonsense." Spike's voice broke through her thoughts. "It was awful, Buffy. All your spark was gone. You were a puppet." He sighed, his hand tightening reflexively on hers.

'Oh, so that's why I couldn't fight him off.' Buffy felt sick and violated at her will being taken away from her, being unwilling or even unable to stop them.

"So, I reminded him he owed me and was right surprised when he gave you up with only a token quibble." Spike glanced over at Buffy, and smirked. "Betcha were a right pain in the arse always fighting him?"

"I tried, sometimes I did and then other times I couldn't, he wouldn't let me." Buffy whispered.

"S'all right now, Slayer. You’re safe."

"I know, you saved me!" Buffy's voice was filled with an incredulous gratitude.

Spike ducked his head, embarrassed.

"Why did you save me, Spike?"

Spike hesitated, unsure as to how much of his feelings he should expose to the tiny woman soaking in the tub next to him. "S'not right wot he did. I couldn't leave you there, letting him touch you with his grubby mitts." Spike trailed off. He took a breath. "Look, I know you don't like me or whatnot but let me help you, make you strong and I'll have your back when you go after the Tranny Vamp."

Buffy giggled at Spike's last insult. "I trust you, Spike. Don't know why, but I do." She lifted her free hand and pulled a face, "eww… pruny hand." She scrunched her nose at her Sire and wriggled her fingers at him. Buffy wondered if her trust for Spike was due to him being her Sire. She recalled all the lectures Giles had given her on Vampiric codes and familial bonds. One of the main themes was the Sire/Childe bond and the trust and love that they shared. Buffy wondered if that was what she was feeling or if it was more than that…

Spike stood and reluctantly released her hand; he pulled open a large towel and held it up. "Hop out, pet."

Before he could turn his head Buffy stood, water streaming off her body. Bubbles sliding down her supple form, Spike tried not to gulp and failed. She stepped out and let him wrap it around her.

"Thanks," she eyed him solemnly and then surprising them both, she grinned. "FYI Spike, I know why I trust you." She paused for a moment and with a wicked gleam in her eyes, she toddled out of the bathroom.

"Well?" Spike followed her out into the bedroom.

"Well what?" Buffy asked innocently as she searched through her suitcase for a brush and sat down on the bed and began to pull it through her hair.

"Why do you trust me?" Spike crossed his arms over his bare chest and cocked his head questioningly.

"You saved me, whereas my best friend fed me to the lions." Buffy grimaced at the memory of Xander walking towards her with a guileless smile on his face. "He knocked me out and delivered a Slayer takeout to that bastard. I know you'd never do that to me."

Spike nodded. "Too right, but in the Whelp's defence…" he trailed off, wondering to himself why he was even trying to defend the Judas nit.

Buffy held up a small, imperious hand. "Don't, Spike. Xander knew what he was doing, he did it off his own back. It's not like Dracula ordered or forced him to do it."

Buffy’s eyes filled with lavender sparkles as she recalled Xander’s words to Dracula as he offered his best-friend up as a sacrificial lamb. Xander had begged to be turned as a reward for bringing the Slayer as a gift. She could hear Drac’s laughter as he took her bound and struggling form off Xander. With a single glance the Master Vampire had removed her will and she had slumped lax in his cool arms. She could hear Xander begging for the Dark Gift from the vampire. Buffy’s heart had broken when she had realised from Xander’s ramblings that it had been his idea and not Dracula’s to bring her to him as a gift…a plaything…to be toyed with as he wished.

Her best-friend had betrayed her.

She sighed heavily, “I don’t know if I can ever forgive him for that and I know I’ll never be able to trust him again!”

Spike nodded. "So you trust me cos I didn't betray you and rescued you? Anything else?" He couldn't help but push. Spike had never dreamt that he and the Slayer would ever have a conversation like this. She trusted him, Spike swore to himself that he would never betray that trust.

"Oh I dunno, Sire." Buffy arched her fine blond brow at Spike.

Spike shuffled on his feet, amazed that she recalled the transfer of Sire. His thumb rubbed over the faint scar on his neck. He didn't know what to say.

"Spike, I understand. It had to be done otherwise I'd still be zombie Buffy." Buffy stood and tightened the towel around her; she walked over and laid her hand over the scar on his neck. "Thank you," she added quietly.

Spike jerked back slightly at the sensation of Buffy again voluntarily touching him - well without violence that is.

"Buffy. Slayer. I swear I'll never use Sire rights over you, I promise."

"I know you won't." Before she could say anything else her stomach growled loudly. They both glanced down at it.

"Could you possibly be hungry?" Spike smirked.

Buffy nodded.

"Get dressed and I'll find you some nosh." Spike pulled on a pair of tracksuit bottoms and walked out of the room, his bare feet slapping on the wood floor.

*********

"You don't mind, do you?" Buffy asked as she walked down the stairs. She had dressed in some shorts and Spike’s discarded t-shirt; long fluffy white socks adorned her small feet. "Wow! This place is amazing, where are we?"

"My place, sort of a getaway I set up a few years back," Spike replied as he readied two mugs of blood. "Also, don’t mind what?"

Buffy stood in the centre of the room, her eyes taking in the décor and the warm ambience. "Huh? Oh! Being my surrogate Sire."

Spike whirled; his eyes flashed gold as his lumpies appeared for a brief second. "Not a surrogate, your mine and I'll protect you til I'm ashes."

Buffy hesitated for a second at the sight of Spike's game face, 'wow he's cute when he's mad!' She fiddled with the waistband of her shorts, "thought you said no grr Sirey stuff upstairs?"

"Nothing surrogate about what we went through. You're my Childe. My only one! If anything or anyone tries to touch or hurt you, I'll eviscerate them. I promise! Let you down once and I’m not doing it again."

Buffy walked over to the distraught vampire and cautiously patted him on the shoulder. "Spike, it's okay. I mean it's not okay, cos hello, creature of the night here, but we'll deal!"

Before Buffy could move, Spike's arms whipped around her and pulled her tight against his body. They stood wrapped around each other for several minutes until the microwave beeped at them.

"Grubs up, pet." Spike grudgingly released his hold on her.

"Food…oh, it's blood." Buffy gazed at the mug Spike had pressed into her hands. Her fingers went numb and she dropped it, the ceramic shattered on impact and blood splattered across the floor. "I...I...he made me...oh god!"

Buffy’s mind filled with flashes of memory of the events of the past few days and nights. The sensual touch of Dracula and his Brides. The pain of their teeth as they bit into her unresisting flesh and their enjoyment of her transformed blood, which was also infused with her Slayer power. She looked down at her covered breasts and remembered watching as Dracula dragged his fangs over her pale flesh, drawing blood, letting it trickle down onto her soft stomach and her sickened reaction to the sight.

Buffy’s skin twitched involuntarily at the remembered sensation of his tongue trailing through her blood, as her Sire watched her face, silently revelling in her fear and horror of what she had become.

Her muscles locked as Buffy remembered refusing to drink from her Sire and he beat her until she submitted, reluctantly sinking her teeth into his wrist and swallowing the borrowed blood that ran through his body. A chill ran down her spine that the memory of her enjoyment at the taste of her Sire’s blood…at the delight at the taste of blood. In Buffy’s mind her reaction to the power blood was the ultimate betrayal of her Calling.

Buffy gagged and swallowed and tried to stop the memories by shaking her head.

But it didn’t work…

The worst was yet to come…

Buffy eye’s filled with tears and they fell unchecked as she saw the three Brides drag in a struggling man. How they had taunted her, mocking the fallen Slayer and saying that she was no longer a Champion but a creature of darkness like them…a creature bound to blood lust. Buffy had tried to escape Dracula’s grasp and escape from the carnal house Xander had delivered her too.

But she failed.

Buffy’s mind shut down as she tried to repress the memories of the events that followed. Ones that had been brought back at the sight of the crimson fluid Spike had given to her in the mug. Her entire being froze. The tears poured down her face and her mouth opened in a silent wail.

Spike’s nostrils flared as the scent of her terror and anguish filled the room. He looked up from the shattered mug and his face dropped at the sight of his Childe paralysed in anguish.

Spike reached out to her, to try and comfort her. "Buffy, stop it love." Spike stepped forward and then howled in pain. He reached down and pulled a shard of ceramic from his heel. Tossing it aside he reached for the catatonic girl in front of him.

Buffy had retreated within herself. The memories of Dracula’s Brides bringing a young college boy to her and her Sire ordering her to feed filled her mind. Bending over she heaved and then threw up, her eyes watering under the strain of her vomiting. She felt Spike's arms around her as he steadied her shuddering form. In the distance she could hear him murmuring reassuringly.

"Oh god! I killed someone! He made me drain that poor boy, I think I knew him from school, Warren Meers…I’m not sure if that was his name, but I think so… Spike, it hurts," She whimpered.

Spike grimaced down at the mess on the kitchen floor as he swung Buffy into his arms. He sat down on the large sofa, Buffy resting her head on his shoulder. Reaching behind him he grabbed a throw and draped it over her.

“I know Slayer, m'sorry he did that. From wot he said, you were refusing to eat and he doesn't brown bag it and god, I'm sorry."

"Spike, I feel so guilty," Buffy whispered into his neck.

"Course you do luv, your soul is talking to you," Spike grimaced at the concept of a soul. But then he looked down at Buffy and was stunned when he realised that he would never have wanted to know her without her soul.

"I kept my soul?" Buffy titled her head back and gazed up at him. She smiled sadly, her hands pressed to her stomach and heart, "yeah, I can feel it."

"S'okay Pet. It's good, cos I know I wouldn't wanna know you if you were soulless." Spike tried to tease her and failed miserably, he was reacting to her sadness.

"Humph." Buffy. "You'd still have rescued me, William."

Spike sighed. "Yeah, probably."

They wrapped themselves around each other and sat there in silence. Spike offering his silent support as Buffy grieved, and tried to adjust to the idea that she had killed a mortal.

*********

“You sure dey’re going to be all right?”

Whistler turned to the ghostly form of the fallen Slayer. “Yeah, they have to be. The Powers had to move pretty fast to fix this mess…but I think that Spike’ll surprise us all, including himself.”

“He might be a lowly Vampire… but he’ll take care of Buffy,” Kendra stood with her incorporeal arms crossed over her chest. Her face creased in a worried frown. “Don’t understand why you dragged me down here to see this, though.”

“We needed the spirit of a Slayer here in case there was trouble. I think Buffy would’ve listened to you if we needed to intervene, last time she saw me she wanted to make me into a party hat!” Whistler grinned at the memory of his exchange with the determined Slayer.

“It’s not fair what has happened to Buffy,” Kendra sighed.

“I know, but events changed and we needed to make sure she was safe and cared for. Most turned Slayers can’t cope with the transition from hunter to hunted.” Whistler adjusted his bowler hat. “We need her, she was the most powerful Slayer ever and now she’ll be unstoppable. We had to make sure she’d be strong enough to fight.”

“So, messing with her mind and the vampire’s is how you people work?” Kendra grunted in disapproval.

“Desperate times lead to desperate measures.” Whistler looked over at the disapproving Slayer. “What? You think removing some of her pain and easing the transition is wrong?”

“Yes…well no…I suppose not, as long as she will be alright?” Buffy’s sister Slayer asked.

“They both will be,” Whistler promised. “Come on, we’ve done all we can.”

“But I can keep an eye out for her?” Kendra asked as the two figures faded away.