Disclaimer: Vampires, slayers, and the rest all belong to Joss Whedon. Thanks for sharing Mr. Whedon!
 
Thanks for the reviews, all you stellar reviewers!
 
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Universal – Chapter 3
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Spike paced restlessly outside the bathroom. Again he was up early in the morning, but this time it hadn’t been much of a struggle. Buffy had gone out and bought a pregnancy test the day before, but the directions said it worked best first thing in the morning. He had found himself barely able to sleep all night. Now he found himself crawling out of his skin with anticipation. Any results yet? he asked, concentrating on the closed bathroom door.
 
The door opened and Buffy came out, wordlessly handing him a white stick with a blue dot in the window. Spike’s eyes widened. Holy shit.
 
That’s what I thought, Buffy responded. Spike could feel the fear starting to creep in to her mind. Spike what does this mean? How can I be pregnant? I mean… is it human?
 
Shh. Don’t panic, pet, he soothed, taking her in his arms. One step at a time.
 
Buffy calmed in his strong embrace. Maybe I should make a doctor’s appointment. I mean, it could be the test giving a false positive, right? she thought hopefully.
 
Perhaps, but somehow I don’t think so. Someone or something is playing with us.
 
At that moment they heard Dawn stirring. Buffy dashed back into the bathroom to hide the evidence. We should keep this to ourselves for now, she thought to Spike as she buried the garbage at the bottom of the trash can.
 
Agreed. He mulled the whole strange situation over as he headed back to the bedroom to get dressed and Buffy went downstairs to get breakfast going. Spike had no idea what to think about this possibility. Vampires were never meant to be parents, but unless he was completely mistaken, that is exactly what was going to happen. How did this come about? he puzzled. One hell of a powerful spell to make a dead man fertile again. He also found himself worrying about Buffy. A pregnant Slayer was a target for all sorts of nasties. Once word of her condition got out, she would have a bull’s-eye painted on her back as big as all outdoors. They weren’t going to be able to handle this alone.
 
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“Well, there’s no doubt about it. You’re pregnant.”
 
Buffy sat in her doctor’s office, stunned. She had made the appointment the moment Dawn had left that morning, and they had been able to fit her in for a blood test later that day. Now two days later she was back, with her friendly young doctor staring at her intently, waiting for some sort of response. “Ms. Summers? Are you alright?”
 
Buffy shook herself. “Yes, I’m fine,” she said distractedly. “I mean, no, I’m really confused. Are you sure?”
 
“These tests have a very low false positive rate. I take it this is an unexpected pregnancy?”
 
“You can say that again,” Buffy replied, running her hand through her hair nervously.
 
“What form of birth control were you using, if any?” Dr. Miller hadn’t known her patient for that long, and the topic had never come up. Ms. Summers rarely came in for regular checkups, being generally healthy as a horse. But clearly, this pregnancy was not part of any plan.
 
“None, actually,” Buffy admitted. “My boyfriend found out a while ago that there was something wrong with his, um, sperm production. He was told he couldn’t have kids, so we didn’t worry about it.” Ok, not exactly a lie. He found out about 120 years ago that being dead sort of got in the way of sperm production, along with several other essential body functions.
 
“I see,” said Dr. Miller. “Do you trust him?”
 
“Yes. I know he’s not lying, if that’s what you mean.”
 
“Well, sometimes these things happen,” Dr. Miller said. “Even we doctors get things wrong sometimes.” She looked closely at Buffy. “What do you plan to do next?”
 
Buffy laughed nervously. “Well, I guess my first task is to tell Sp… William that he’s going to be a father. Then I guess we’ll figure things out from there.”
 
“So you plan to continue the pregnancy?” Dr. Miller pressed. “Because there are some vitamins and such you should take if you do.”
 
Buffy took a deep breath. “For now, I guess I am. Continuing the pregnancy, that is.” Although knowing exactly whatI’m carrying is a key piece of information that would be nice to have. She had no idea how to broach the concept of ‘possible demon child’ with her doctor without her doctor calling for a straightjacket. Another thought occurred to her. “How long will it be before it shows?”
 
“Well, based on how far along things are, I’d say about four months, give or take. Might be less because you’re so petite. Why do you ask?”
 
“There are some people in my life who are probably going to freak about this. I want to know how long I have to get them used to the idea.”
 
The doctor looked at her with kind understanding. “You just make sure you take care of yourself and find a good support team. Don’t let anyone stress you out. Bad for you and the baby.”
 
Buffy nodded. “Thanks, Dr. Miller.”
 
“I’ll write you a prescription for the prenatal vitamins, and here’s some literature about nutrition and other related topics.” Buffy took the proffered pamphlets with a sense of unreality. This can’t be happening. This is not physically possible. How can this be? What in the name of God are we going to do? Buffy’s hands trembled slightly as she took the prescription and tucked it in her purse. Dr. Miller noticed her nervousness and said, “Do you have a good relationship with the father?”
 
“Yes. A very good relationship.” Buffy couldn’t help smiling faintly at the thought of her lover.
 
“Then you’ll be ok,” the doctor reassured her. “Half the battle is having a partner.”
 
Buffy thanked her again and left thinking, I sure hope that the other half of the battle isn’t an apocalypse. She walked home in a state of shock. I’m pregnant. With child. In a family way. Bun in the oven. Knocked up. Holy. Fucking. Crap. She chewed on the inside of her cheek, trying to stave off the panic. Her brain was keeping up a constant barrage of questions. What does this mean? How did this happen? What are we going to do?
 
A block away from home she became aware of Spike’s thoughts as he waited in the house. They found that their mental link was expanding. At first they could only read each other’s thoughts if they were touching, but now they could get a block or so away from each other and still hear each other, if they concentrated hard enough. But Spike seemed lost in his own musings. Who could have done this to us? How am I going to keep her safe? His thoughts were as confused and worried as her own.
 
She kept her thoughts shielded as she entered the house. Spike had been sitting in front of the TV, changing channels every 30 seconds, not able to concentrate on anything. He stood up when she came in, coming over to put his hands on her shoulders and look into her eyes. “What’s the verdict?”
 
“I’m pregnant, Spike. Sometime end of next July, you’re going to be a father.”
 
Even though Spike had strongly suspected that this was the case, he still found himself utterly floored by the idea. He gaped at her open mouthed for a moment before he whispered, “They’re certain?”
 
Buffy nodded, then stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her head in his chest. I’m afraid. This shouldn’t be possible.
 
I know pet, he thought as he stroked her back and rested his head on hers. How do you feel?
 
Physically? A little nauseous, but otherwise ok, she responded. Mentally? I’m completely confused.
 
We’ll figure this out, Buffy, he reassured her. There must be some explanation.
 
I think we should keep this to ourselves until we do some research, Buffy thought. If we tell Dawn she might blab to the wrong person, and I don’t really want it getting around to Xander and Willow right now.
 
How long before we can’t hide this anymore, love?
 
Probably about four months or so. Might be sooner because I’m ‘petite’, as my doctor put it.
 
Well, you are barely a mouthful, he smiled, looking into her eyes. He bent down for a long, lingering kiss. Then aloud he said, “I love you, Buffy. I know you’re worried. So am I. But I will do everything in my power to protect you, and the little one.”
 
“I love you too. And I do hope I stop freaking out sometime before this kid is in college,” she said. Spike could sense her utter terror at the whole pregnancy idea, and he held her close for a few more minutes, stroking her hair and soothing her with his presence. Finally, Buffy felt enough in control of herself to let go of Spike and move into the living room to flop on the couch.
 
“So what should our next move be?” she asked Spike as they both leaned back and put their feet up on the coffee table. Buffy rested her head on his shoulder and linked her hand with his as she waited for his reply.
 
Spike ruminated for a while. Then he said, “Best bet would be to hit the books, I think. See if there is anything on demon-human crossbreeds that would apply, or any spells that could do something like this. At least give us a place to start.”
 
“I guess that means going to the Magic Box,” said Buffy, frowning. “I’m still not completely ready to deal with Xander and Willow yet.”
 
“We could call Anya and ask her when the place will be free at night. Better chance of keeping this to ourselves for now.”
 
“We could go tonight after patrol maybe,” Buffy agreed.
 
Spike didn’t reply right away, and Buffy could sense him closing off his thoughts. What? she thought, probing his mind gently.
 
Spike took a deep breath. “I want to say I’m not sure you should patrol any more, but I don’t want to have my ass handed to me by a pissed off Slayer,” he said at last.
 
“What do you mean, I shouldn’t patrol?”
 
Spike leaned his head on the back of the sofa and stared at the ceiling. Sometimes being a man in the present era just sucked. If you expressed concern you were being misogynistic or patronizing, and if you said nothing you were uncaring and insensitive. Can’t bloody win either way. “Buffy, if you’re pregnant, you’re going to be a magnet for every demon in California. They may not be able to smell it on you just yet, but soon they will, and when word gets out you’ll have an even bigger target on your back than before. I don’t want to lose you.”
 
Buffy probed again with her mind, to get at what he was feeling. She felt his love, his fear for her, but no feeling that she couldn’t handle it or was somehow weak. She stroked his cheek until he turned to face her. “I understand, Spike. I know what you’re saying. But I need to keep patrolling right now, if only to keep anyone from thinking something is up. I’ll be safe enough for now. I know you’ll protect me. But let’s figure out what this thing is before we do a radical change, ok?”
 
Spike sighed. There was no arguing with the Summers women. “Alright, love. But if I see you taking any stupid risks I will personally drain you myself.”
 
“Yessir, Mr. Big Bad,” Buffy teased. They fell into another long, deep kissing session that would have escalated into more had Dawn not arrived home.
 
Dinner and homework was the same as it ever was, with both Buffy and Spike doing their best not to give anything away. While Spike was giving Dawn a few more pointers on her French homework, Buffy called up Anya at the Magic Box.
 
“Magic Box, how may I help you?”
 
“Hi Anya, it’s Buffy”
 
“Oh, hello Buffy,” Anya said. “What can I do for you?”
 
“Spike and I have some research we’d like to do, but we’d rather not involve the others. Are they likely to be there tonight?”
 
“You’re in luck. We were planning on going to the Bronze tonight. Do you still have your key?”
 
“Yep. And I’ll lock up when we’re done.”
 
“Anything I can help you with? I could pull out relevant books if you can give me a topic,” Anya said helpfully.
 
“N…no, that’s ok,” Buffy said. “We’re still a little vague on what we’re looking for. But we’ll let you know if we run into any snags.”
 
“Ok then. And tell Spike to keep his hands off the Burba weed. He still owes me money for that.”
 
Buffy rolled her eyes, but said, “I’ll tell him. Bye.” Anya signed off and they both hung up.
 
By this time Dawn had finished her homework and was diving onto the couch for some well earned vegetation. Buffy and Spike joined her for some sitcom, sitting on either side of her but with neither of them paying much attention to what was on the screen. They found themselves having a quiet discussion while they pretended interest in the show. Can you really tell someone is pregnant from a distance? Buffy wondered.
 
Not at first, Spike replied, but after its heart starts beating then sure. Plus like I said, different hormones mean different tastes and scents.
 
Have I mentioned how weird the vampire smelling thing is lately?
 
Spike smirked at her over Dawn’s head. You may have said something a while back. I guess I wasn’t listening. Too busy smelling your hot little…
 
Watch it, Mister. No fair getting me all riled up with my sister in the middle. Buffy gave him a mock frown, which Dawn caught out of the corner of her eye.
 
“Jeez, would you two stop the silent conversation thing! It’s creeping me out!” she said.
 
Spike laughed. “What, do you think we’re talking about you, Nibblet?”
 
“No! You’re probably thinking about sex, again, and really, you guys need to find another hobby.”
 
Buffy reddened a bit, but Spike just laughed again. “All part of our plan to warp you forever,” he teased.
 
“Well it’s working,” Dawn said good-naturedly. “Don’t you guys have a town to patrol or something?”
 
Spike looked apprehensively at Buffy, but she just stood up and said, “I guess you’re right. Come on, Vampire, up and at ‘em. Dawn, make sure you…”
 
“Lock the doors and don’t let anyone in. Yes. I know,” she sighed in an exasperated tone.
 
Buffy rolled her eyes to the ceiling as she went to get her shoes on. The two warriors left, with Buffy pausing to put the magical wards on the house as she went. They walked side by side toward town, not saying or thinking much. Finally Buffy said, “Should we research first, then patrol?”
 
“Sounds good,” Spike agreed, and they turned toward the Magic Box. They found it deserted, as promised, and went in. They turned on the lights and went over to the book shelves, wondering where to start. Spike took the lead, and found several books on demon-human crossbreeds. They sat down and read, but after an hour they were no wiser. “If I wanted to mate with a Fyral demon I could find twelve different books to tell me what to feed the spawn, but doesn’t look like anyone else has succeeded in mating with a vampire,” Buffy said, tossing the book on the table in defeat.
 
“Not very surprising, I suppose,” Spike mused. “Given that we’re deceased and all.” He closed the book he was reading, having also struck out. He put the books back and looked at more titles.
 
Buffy had a thought. “Could it have anything to do with the claim?”
 
Spike scratched his head. “Doubt it. But then I don’t know of many vampires who have claimed a human mate, so it’s possible.” He pulled out a few books on vampire mating rituals and they flipped through those for a while. But they could find no reference to vampires and humans mating at all, let alone a vampire and a Slayer. Stumped, they put the books back and left, confused as ever. They began to patrol through the cemeteries, discussing what they had read, but getting nowhere.
 
In the third cemetery they heard noises coming from one of the larger tombs. Peering in through a stained glass window, they saw a nest of five vampires trading war stories. Please let me go in first, pet? Okay? Spike begged silently.
 
His concern and fear for her rippled across their link. She was a bit annoyed at being treated as fragile all of a sudden, but decided that now was not the time to argue. Alright. But you be careful too, clear? Spike nodded, and pulled out a stake for each hand. 1…2…3 they thought together, then Spike kicked in the door. They fought in a coordinated flurry, with Spike taking down two vampires before the other three even knew what was happening. Buffy spun into a hooking kick to knock one of them flat to the ground before leaping and staking him. Spike grappled with the two remaining vamps. He dusted one, but the other leaped onto his back, trying to throttle him into submission. Buffy got up, feeling slightly dizzy, then scooped up a stake and jammed it into the last vampire’s back. Dust flew as Spike rubbed his throat and coughed out, “Thanks, pet. You ok?”
 
“A little dizzy, but otherwise fine,” she said. “I hope my spinning kicks aren’t going to make me feel nauseous all the time like that.”
 
Spike frowned a bit. “Slayer, do I have to chain you up again to keep you safe?”
 
“I’ll be fine,” she insisted. “Come on, let’s finish patrolling.” They caught a couple of fledges in the remaining cemeteries, which Spike dispatched with little effort, then headed home.
 
Buffy was yawning by the time they got in the house. Sleepy tonight, she thought as they headed upstairs.
 
Been a big day for us, Spike agreed. They both stripped and got into bed, twining around each other like a couple of vines. Their lips found each other, initially intending a simple goodnight kiss, but quickly intensifying into a sweet, slow, and satisfying lovemaking session. Spike pulled Buffy’s thigh over his as he slowly entered her. They remained side by side, making barely visible movements while Buffy worked her inner muscles to bring them both to the edge. Christ, Slayer, how do you do that?
 
You mean this? Buffy smiled wickedly as she squeezed him tight again, making him groan in pleasure. He quickened and intensified his own movements, nibbling his way down her neck to her breasts while he did. Buffy gasped at the feeling of his teeth on her nipple. He vamped and gently sank his fangs into her breast, pulling her over the edge with a gasp and following her down a heartbeat later. He licked the wounds closed and lay next to her, both of them panting with emotion. Buffy rolled onto her back with her eyes still locked with his and a contented smile on her face. That was amazing, lover.
 
You’re going to dust me with those muscles someday, he thought as he ran his hand down her body. What a way to go, though. His hand traveled until it came to rest on her stomach. Buffy put her hand on his and watched him as he stared at it.
 
What are you thinking? Buffy wondered.
 
Just can’t suss out how this can be. Being a father’s something that’s not crossed my mind since before I was turned.
 
Do you want to? Be a father?
 
Spike’s thoughts were a blur. He spread his hand out on her abdomen, watching the contrast between her tanned skin and his pale fingers. I think I do. I know it’s impossible and dangerous for all of us, and I’d probably be about the last person anyone would consider as a responsible parent. But the thought that we made this new person, you and me together – it’s something I can’t quite describe.
 
I’m still so worried that it won’t be human, Buffy thought, resting her head on Spike’s chest. And if it is human, how am I going to take care of a baby, and Dawn, and slaying? I don’t know anything about babies!
 
Come on, Slayer. You’ve averted how many apocalypses and crises? You’ve returned from the grave twice! I think you can handle a couple of wet nappies.
 
Buffy was grateful for his support and confidence in her. I hope it has your eyes, she thought as she proceeded to fall asleep. Spike stayed awake for some time, watching her sleep and stroking her stomach, and thinking.
 
TBC