Disclaimer:All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Beta’d by the wonderful Marella916 and All4Spike. Banner by the lovely and talented nmcil12.

Just a warning: This is an AU spuffy story. BUT Buffy is only 16 when this starts so the spuffy lovin' while it will happen won't be for awhile. There will be briefly Bangel. I don't mind Angel, but I do not like the pairing of Buffy/Angel but it is necessary to the plot. I have rated this M for now for adult language, eventually there will be smut but like I said it won't happen right away so try to be patient. I hope you enjoy what I have done with the characters. I have used certain elements of the show, certain bad guys and even some dialog.

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Taking her books and stuffing them in her bag, Buffy was about to slam her locker closed when she heard Giles talking to Spike in the library. Sliding forward silently, she strained to hear what they were talking about.

“Well that was a barrel of laughs.” She heard Spike say.

“Is he always this stubborn?”

“When he thinks he’s right? Yeah. An’ since he always thinks he knows better…” Spike let the sentence hang.

“Should we take any special precautions? I doubt he will cease with his campaign against you.”

“Nah, I’m safe enough. The house is vamp-proof. Nothin’ the great git can do to me.”

“How is the house vamp-proof? Neither you or Whistler is human.”

Spike knew this wasn’t going to go over well with the watcher. Sitting down at the table, he waited for Giles to join him. “Put the house in a human’s name.”

“Who? Willow and Xander are much too young to own property, it would raise quite a few red flags.”

“Slayer’s mum.” He mumbled so quietly that Giles had to ask him to repeat it.

“The slayer’s mum.” He said a little louder looking sheepish.

“What?” Giles asked in disbelief.

“Listen, I figure my job here is done once Buf.., once the slayer figures out what she wants. If she goes the whole normal life thing, then once she’s done wit’ high school she’ll be takin’ off for greener pastures, college and babies and all that rot. If she starts slaying again, I just have to make sure she doesn’t die and come back. Happened the first time around, the line got split and then the slayer died again an’ was resurrected. That allowed the first evil to start a war.”

“I don’t quite understand. How does that translate into putting your home into Joyce’s name?”

“Either way it goes, the house belongs to the slayer. There was this prophecy, said a vamp with a soul would turn human after fighting in an apocalypse. In the other dimension, everybody said it was Peaches, even after I got mine. Figure it’ll be the same here, so she and the poof can live in the house, get married and have those babies. You know, that normal she’s lookin’ for.Took a bit of wrangling but I stopped by the demon courthouse and got it set up. Joyce’s name is on the title, I’m just the tenant. Once the slayer turns eighteen, the title transfers over to her and I move out. ‘S all on the up and up, watcher. I had Joyce invite me in after I got the paperwork in order. Didn’t tell her about the title transferring, just said for it to be vamp-proof a human needed to own it.”

“Spike..” The sympathy in Giles voice made the slayer listening at the door uncomfortable.

“Don’… just leave it be. Told you she loves him, always did, always will, even if she don’ know it yet. I was just muscle to her. Nothin’ more, nothin’ less.”          
               
Buffy barely stifled a gasp at what she was hearing. If she didn’t know better, it sounded as though Spike was in love with her! But Merrick had told her that soulless demons couldn’t love; that they didn’t have real feelings! But why would Spike do all this? He didn’t even know her! And did Spike just say he had his soul? Shutting down her confusing thoughts, she listened intently to the conversation going on.

“There is no way to know whether the prophecy is about you or Angel. Do you even want to be human?” Giles inquired quietly.

“No. I love the power and the strength being a vamp gives me. Hell, I loved it when I was first turned. Granted, back then it was because I was finally able to get back at those berks who had insulted me. But now, I love the fight; taking on demons and such is a rush and I’m practically invincible.” Spike paused for a second and then said decisively, “No, I don’t want to be human again. Let Angel have it.”

“What’s bothering you then?”

“I’m done after this, watcher. Once Buffy’s safe, you won’t see me again. I can’t….” Hearing Spike’s voice breaking Buffy eased up onto her toes to look through the window in the door. She watched as Giles laid a gentle hand on the vampire’s shoulder.

Spike started when the other man offered him comfort. He pulled himself together and pulled his features into a bland mask. Shrugging off the hand, he stood up and started pacing. “It should be a pretty easy year. From what the bit told me that summer, the Master was the biggest thing the slayer had to face this year. He’s dead so the slayer’s safe from him. That means the line didn’t split ‘cause she didn’t die. That means the island slayer won’t be called. Don’t know what-all’s coming though, so we need to start getting more organized.”

“You did say that next year, Angel...”

“I told you, you can’t stop it. All you can do is get ready for it. ‘S like a natural disaster; nothing can stop it.” He shook his head ruefully.

“Surely that’s not the case. If we simply explain the danger, or if you spent more time with her, we could prevent…”

A deep snarl tore out of Spike’s throat, making Buffy jump. She almost burst into the room, stopping herself just in time. “I told you I’m not going there again. Do you have any idea how painful it is to burn to death?” His voice was thick and rough with emotion. “I do. I did it for her, because I loved her. Trust me when I tell you, it isn’t pleasant. The big broody git came and gave her some shiny bauble. Told her it was dangerous. She kissed him, took it, and sent him on his merry way. Gave him some speech about being cookie dough an’ not being done baking yet. After I popped out of that necklace, you have any idea how many times I had to listen to the poof tell me that she told ‘im they had a future together? That she could see herself with him in the future?”

“She brought it to me. SHE KNEW! She knew it would kill me and she didn’t think twice.” The words tore out of his throat.

“Spike how can you be certain she knew that?”

“Because Rupes, as I started burning up, she told me she loved me.”

“Well…Wait, I don’t understand. You’re upset because she told you she loved you?”

“She didn’t mean it.”

Giles was stunned by the certainty in Spike’s voice, the longing in his eyes. “Spike how can you be so sure that she didn’t mean it?”

“Because the night before I burned is when she gave Angel that cookie dough speech after planting one on him. And not five months later, I saw her in a night club dancing like she hadn’t a care in the world, snuggling up to the Immortal. I did it so she could live, have that normal she was always looking for. But coming back and realizing that I didn’t matter to her at all? That she didn’t even mourn me? It’s too much, watcher.”

“The Immortal? That explains one of the visions the Oracles gave me. Alberto’s his name, although the self-important git insists on being called the Immortal. He’s… But he sold his soul for immortality well over five hundred years ago! He is well known by the council for his immoral dealings! They have been trying to stop him for centuries! He is known to sell young women, and even young boys into sexual slavery. Demons contract with him to obtain sacrifices. He has sold weapons and government secrets to terrorists. There is even mention of him unsuccessfully trying to remove a sarcophagus of an Old One from the Deeper Well. Are you certain you saw correctly?”

“‘S not like I can say any different. I wanted what Dru was offering, didn’t know exactly what it was but I knew I wanted to be something more than I was.” Spike plopped down in a chair with none of his usual grace, suddenly looking tired beyond belief. “Went to Buffy’s place in Rome, ya know? The boy, Andrew” Spike waved off Giles’ confused look. “Not important, anyway he told me they had been dating for a while. That’s how I know she’d lied. How I was sure she’d known that amulet would kill me. She and the rest of you lot went on and on for years about how she couldn’t love me because I was soulless back then. How I was an evil disgusting thing without a soul an’ not able to feel real emotions without it. So I go out an’ earn the damn thing for her an’ not even ‘alf a year goes by after I die, and she’s dating someone who sold their soul.”

As Buffy watched, a look of profound sadness crossed the vampire’s face. “Had nothin’ to do with my soul, watcher. It was me she didn’t love. I love, can’t seem to stop, but the women I love take and take an’ use it but never return it. Dru needed a caretaker and a plaything, the slayer needed a punching bag and someone to scratch an itch. I told that demon in the cave to make me what she needed, what she deserved. Seems she needed some berk to die in place of Peaches. Told me she loved me to make sure I’d stay and finish the job. I won’t do it again. I know this girl is a different Buffy from mine, but you’ve seen her; the way she looks at me. She don’ even know me and she’s disgusted by me.”

“I’m sorry, Spike. All I can say is that things might go differently here. You don’t know how things will turn out. The Powers…”

A harsh bark of laughter cut the watcher off mid-sentence. “The Powers? Those soddin’ wankers. I figured after burning up in the Hellmouth I was done. Instead I come poppin’ outta that amulet and after hanging around helping Angel, I thought I mighta been done then when I died again in that alley. At the very least I would spend eternity roastin’ in some hell dimension. Figured it was a fair trade for all the murder and mayhem I created the first time aroun’. But not them, The Powers that Like to Screw With You. They came up with their own version of hell, an’ this is it. Buffy, a Buffy who hasn’t had her heart torn to shreds by the poof. A Buffy who still thinks I’m nothin’ but an evil soulless disgusting demon. An’ what do I have to do? See that she has a happy life; a life that’s never going to include me. That’s hell, watcher; the worst kind of hell.”

Giles sat quietly, while Spike regained some semblance of control over his emotions.

                                                                        §

Buffy stumbled away from the school, her mind in a jumble. He sounded so sincere, so sad. But Angel was convinced that Spike was evil. Why does this stuff happen to me? If Spike really had his soul, Giles would have said something, right? So he must be lying. Maybe Angel was right and Spike has him under some kind of spell. But no one could fake the pain that Spike had in his voice. Buffy had been moved to tears by it.

She shoved the incident with Giles and Spike to the back of her mind as the school year progressed. It was too much; she couldn’t understand what she had overheard. There wasn’t anyone she could talk to about it either, to help her make sense of it all. She tried. Oh she’d brought up the subject of Spike with Angel and he had gone nuclear as soon as the other vampire’s name had been mentioned. After twenty minutes of him ranting and going on about how evil Spike was, Buffy had never brought it up with him again.

The one time she’d gone to talk to Giles about the whole Spike thing, she’d lost her nerve. Walking up to the library doors, she’d peeked through the window and seen Spike sitting at the table in a discussion with the librarian. She’d made a hasty exit before either of the men had seen her and had gone for a walk to clear her head.
She didn’t have a best friend to talk to. There was no way she could discuss this with Cordy or that group. Mom hadn’t been much help either. Joyce was so grateful that Buffy didn’t have to go out every night and patrol that she brushed aside any concerns Buffy had. “Honey, from what Mr. Giles said, Spike is here to help you. I don’t care if he has a soul or not. Even if he’s a vampire or not. The thought of you out night after night fighting vampires and demons…”  Joyce grabbed Buffy and held on to her in a tight grip. “I’m just glad you’re safe and that Spike is here.”

                                                                        §

Oz was intrigued. The new girl, a freshman, Dawn Summers had caught his eye when she and her sister had transferred a few months ago. She had a bright smile that lit up her blue eyes. Every time something weird would happen in school, Dawn would be there with a few of the students from his grade. Noticing how much time she spent in the school library Oz started making his way there after classes a few days a week. The conversation would often stop or become stilted when he arrived. It wasn’t until the end of the school year that he found out why.

Oz was leaving Devon’s house after practicing for their band, Dingoes Ate My Baby’s upcoming gig at the Bronze, when he heard someone screaming. Running towards the sound, he rounded the corner to see a fellow student, Willow Rosenberg, being attacked. A slim bleached blonde appeared out of nowhere and yanked the attacker off the girl. A brief struggle ensued and quickly ended when the blonde shoved a wooden stick into the chest of his opponent.

Oz’s only comment after learning about the Sunnydale night life was, “That explains a lot.”

The quiet musician was welcomed into the group and would often join in patrolling after practice. His enthusiasm for the work increased when he arrived at Spike’s house one day to gather weapons before patrol and found Dawn Summers there, sparring with the vampire.

                                                                                                            §

Spike had noticed the interest that Oz had been showing in Dawn. He was in a quandary; nobody was good enough for his Bit. Only this wasn’t his Bit. Oh, she was still Dawn all right. But they didn’t have the close relationship that they’d had in his dimension. He missed it. Despite the Wankers that Be sending this Dawn dreams that she could trust him, they didn’t have the same bond as before.

The boy seemed nice enough, but Spike was determined to have a talk with him. If he hurt Dawn in any way, or pushed her before she was ready, the boy would be a footnote in history before he could blink. He decided the best place to start was with a casual conversation and then work up to a discussion of his intentions with Dawn. Spike noticed the boy was wearing a chain around his neck with a signed guitar pick on it. “Nice pick, who signed it?”

“Dylan. My dad bought it years ago from a collector.” Oz pulled the chain out so it could be seen clearly.

“Huh, it’s authentic?” Spike asked, eyeing it appreciatively.

“Yeah, he gave it to me when I got my first guitar. I haven’t taken it off since.”

Dawnpeered over at it, “Who’s Dylan?”

Twin groans sounded in the room. “Bit, you’ve got to stop listening to that boy band crap. That stuff’ll rot your brain.”

“Oh, like that punk crap you listen to is much better.”

“Bob Dylan, singer, song-writer.” Oz supplied.

“Oh! I don’t think I’ve ever heard his music before.”

“I have some of his albums, if you want to come over one day and listen?”

“Sure that’d be great!” Dawn grinned excitedly. Smiling, she left the basement to get a snack upstairs.

Oz went to follow her when Spike stopped him. “Jus’ how much older than the bit are you?”

“I’m a sophomore like Buffy and the others but I had to repeat the year. I had a lot of incompletes last year and then there was summer school but I didn’t go. So…”

“You hurt her, or try to get her to do somethin’ she isn’t ready for, an’ I’ll tear a hole in your throat and yank your innards out of it. You hear?”

Oz stood there looking at the vampire in front of him for a minute before answering. “Got it.” He turned and made his way up the stairs to join Dawn, leaving the vampire alone in the basement.

                                                                        §

With no slaying duties to get in the way, Buffy tried out for, and made, the cheerleading squad. Unfortunately, being part of the squad didn’t help her relationship with Cordelia and the Cordettes. The girls were vicious in their teasing of the other students and Buffy was constantly uncomfortable around them. Once the sun went down, she spent most of her time with Angel in the room he had rented, or at the Bronze. The vampire rarely joined her there, stating that he was too old to spend time at a hangout for teenagers. His constant nagging that she should patrol and his cryptic warnings about looming dangers were starting to wear on her.

Buffy welcomed the end of the school year. She and Dawn were going to spend the summer in L.A. with their dad. Desperate to get away from the tension in Sunnydale, Buffy couldn’t wait for the mindless fun of shopping that awaited her. Even having Dawn with her for the summer couldn’t dampen her enthusiasm for the trip.