~*~
Chapter 4
~*~

The biggest surprise Spike had after moving back to the crypt wasn’t the welcome home/housewarming party thrown by the two witches, though that had resulted in a generous amount of secondhand furniture gifts. No, it was that the Slayer had begun to pay nightly visits. Seemed she had become used to their chats and was seeking him out! He had expected the odd visit from the lovebirds, especially Tara, but he had never anticipated the Slayer missing him. If he hadn’t already been feeling better, that would have cured him.

"Dawn’s pissed at you, you know." Buffy had stopped by with his weekly postcard from the Bit and stayed for a chat. "Pissed at me, too. She thinks I made
you move out. You’re so gonna have to convince her it was your idea or I’ll have to listen to her whine for the next year! She’ll be home in a few weeks to get ready for school. She’s already missed the first grading period. Good thing Giles covered with some work-study credit. I think she expected you to become our permanent roommate. I tried to explain that you need your privacy to, you know, do evil vampire things that you can’t do in the Slayer’s basement. Then she called me a dorkwad!" Buffy complained.

"Gonna have to get on her ‘bout respectin’ her elders there, Slayer." Spike laughed when Buffy’s eye rolled at the thought of trying to put that across to her little pest of a sister. "So, Bit’s comin home soon. Good. She’s been away from home too long if you ask me. Rupes learn any important key information by kidnappin’ our girl for the summer?"

"Not really. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see if she has any superpowers. My luck she’ll turn out to have some kind of comic book kinda power that’ll
make messes I have to clean up for the rest of her life," Buffy huffed. "Chaos Girl! She’ll enter a room and everything will fly off shelves to the floor.
Clothes will fling themselves from closets and strew themselves around rooms. Toothpaste tubes will squeeze out on cabinets and lose their caps forever. Even scarier, every horny teenaged boy within 100 miles will be drawn to her amazing pheromone output and I’ll have to change my policy about not staking humans," Buffy grinned at the thought.


"Maybe that inhuman screech she showed all of us last year will turn out to be her secret weapon. The ability to make ears bleed within a city block!" Spike joined in the game of ‘name the Bit’s secret power’ with his own suggestions. "She’s got a real knack for sneakin’ out of the house and findin’ herself in the company of demons. That’s gotta rate up there some way."

"Yes, well, you don’t count. Dawn was always safe with you. I know that now." Spike wasn’t sure whether to be insulted for not being a big enough bad or chuffed that Buffy finally credited him with real feelings, at least where Dawn was concerned.

"I bloody well DO count. The minx could’ve easily been a right nice lunch there at the start!" Spike decided to protect that precious image of master of evil.

Buffy snorted as she laughed at him. "Sure, Big Bad… whatever! Eat her right up while on commercial break during Passions."

"Hey, I don’t make fun of your stupid so-called reality shows, do I?" Spike defended his choice of entertainment by taking a swipe at Buffy’s notorious
bad taste. "Least my favorites involve a bit of talented actin’ and writin’."

"Have we watched the same show here, bud? Talented? I’m thinking not." Buffy continued her assault on all things Passions. "Jerry Spinger has better acting
and more believable stories, too."

"No accountin’ for taste, I guess. Your mum liked Passions too, you know," Spike defended with the big ammo. He instantly regretted bringing up Joyce as he saw Buffy’s good humor fade and the sadness return. "Oh, bollocks! Damn, I’m sorry Buffy. You’re right, it’s just a stupid telly program. I didn’t mean to remind you of sad things. Sometimes I think Anya’s little sex toy may have a point about me and my mouth."

Buffy gave a little laugh at Spike’s new nickname for Xander. "Apology accepted. I know you really feel bad because you said something kind of nice about Xander. I don’t mind remembering mom. I miss her a lot. It’s nice you shared something with her, too."

"Good lady, your mom. Always treated me like I mattered, like I wasn’t just some monster in a man suit. Guess it’s true that the good die young." Spike tried to console Buffy.

"She liked you, too. She knew you were a vampire and had a clue what that meant but she also saw a man in there. She liked that man. I think I see him, too, sometimes." Buffy blushed and slightly moved further away from him on the bench where they were sitting.

There was silence for a while as both beings wondered just what was happening between them. Both were afraid to speak and break something fragile.

"Okay, that was awkward." Buffy admitted. "Say, want to go kill something? I could use some backup on patrol every once in a while. Tonight might be good,
if you’re up for it?"

Spike spent the rest of September blissfully enjoying frequent visits from Red and Glinda and nightly patrols and conversations with Buffy herself. "Life doesn’t get any better," he thought more than once.

It was during an evening of marathon Pictionary that Buffy announced Dawn would be home the next day. Clem, who had become something of a regular on game
night, was a bit nervous about the return of the Slayer’s little sister, whom he barely knew. "Gee, do you think she’d be, you know, weirded out by my hanging with you guys?"

"She’ll be more squigged by what you do with those disgustin’ cheese things you insist on dippin’ in chocolate. Of course she won’t mind! Bit’s not like
that. Takes a person for who they are on the inside." Spike defended his girl’s character to his best demon friend.

Tara laughed and said, "I don’t know about that, Spike. I’ve tasted some of Dawnie’s kitchen experiments. She might like Clem’s special treats."

"Actually, it’s better with Nutella," offered Willow.

"Too bad Xander backed out. If he’d just loosen up a bit, he’d have a good time. He even laughed the last time we got him to join us. I wish he’d just get over
his Spike issues," Willow said sadly. She missed having Xander around all the time. True, the boy continued to be a big part of their lives, but then he’d remember he was supposed to hate Spike and would beg off on game or movie night until Anya got tired of his sulking and insist they rejoin the group.

"Speaking of the construction worker, did you ask him to have a look at those drippy pipes in your basement, love?" Spike had told Buffy about his unpleasant wake-up call while he was living in her basement.

"Yeah, he’s going to see which contractor buddy he can get to have a look at them. I think I’m going to need to get a job before too long. The hospital bill monster and its scavenging bill collector minions ate mom’s insurance. Now THERE are some demons I’d love to slay."

Spike nodded sympathetically. Buffy had looked rather worried lately and her timing had been a bit off while patrolling. He meant to ask her what was wrong but was hoping she would open up on her own. Now the cat was out of the proverbial bag, maybe they could come up with a way to help.

"Hey, Buffy, I have an idea that might sound stupid, but it could work. Don’t get all mad, just hear me out." Willow continued after Buffy nodded for her to go on. "I was thinking. You need to rest so you can patrol every day. You’re really going to be busy when Dawnie gets home ‘cause you’re gonna have to be insta-mom and be all perfect Suzy Homemaker to keep Social Services happy. Not much time for a nine-to-five without really sucking the life out of you. What if I pulled out the BuffyBot and rewired her to be more Working Girl! Buffy instead of Woo Hoo! Buffy. She could get a job and you could be sleeping while she was off doing the daily grind! We could even brush off her slaying programming and she could help patrol!"

Buffy was stunned to silence, but as she thought about what her oldest friend had said, she began to think it might be worth looking into. "I can’t say I love the
idea of the Bot being around, but that might be a doable idea if you got rid of certain programming." She shot a dark look Spike’s way.

Spike found himself with a deep need to retie his Docs as he felt Buffy’s eyes burn into the back of his head. ‘Nope, not completely forgiven for that one,’ he thought. ‘Best keep my yap shut even if I think it’s a bloody brilliant idea Red’s got there.’

"Maybe when Mr. Giles gets back, we can see what he thinks about it, Buffy. I’m sure Willow can make her a lot more like the real you. You know, all
business-like and not so … em … perky." Tara smiled at her girlfriend after offering her verbal support of the idea.

"Make her more like the ‘other, not so pleasant Buffy’, you mean?" Buffy shot yet another burning glare at the uncomfortable vampire on her right.

"Oh, no, no! Buffy, you’re pleasant. You’re a regular sweetie! I mean…you opened your home and your heart to me and you go out and risk your life every night for all of us. I didn’t mean to insult you. I d…d…d…don’t want you to think I meant anything negative by what I said!" Poor Tara stuttered for the first time in over a year, upset to think she had accidentally insulted her lover’s best friend.

"That was directed at me, honeygirl. I’m the bloke that put my foot in that one." Spike patted Tara’s hand. "You know I don’t think of you like that anymore don’t
you, pet?" Spike looked into Buffy’s eyes earnestly.

Buffy tried to hold on to the old feelings of anger and hurt but just couldn’t do it. She sighed and rolled her eyes at him. "After all that’s happened since then, I don’t think it would matter now. Lots of things have changed, including how we all see each other. Time to take that monkey’s advice from ‘Lion King’ and just whack myself in the head with that stick and remind myself it’s in the past."

"Well if you have to whack anyone, whack me. I’m the wanker who said it and had the soddin’ Bot built, for that matter." Spike said softly. "Bloody daft idea, that was. As if anyone could come close to makin’ anything that captured Buffy Summers."

Buffy blushed at the attempt at a compliment and moved the conversation back to the practicalities of reviving the Bot. "So, Will, are you sure you can reattach the head? Won’t it have some weird tics or something?"

"I’m pretty sure I can do it, Buffy. Just think, you could be in two places as once…well, kinda anyway," Willow said with a wide grin.

"At least it wouldn’t be another mouth to feed. Yeah, go ahead and try to get it fixed. We’ll see about the rest," Buffy agreed.

"Just think, Buffy, you could even take a vacation!" Clem was getting into the spirit. "You’d be the first Slayer ever to be able to go to Disneyland and still
not miss patrol. I think it’s a cool idea. Willow, you rock!"

~~~

"Xander Harris, we could be over there winning at Pictionary if you weren’t such a stubborn cuss," Anya chided her sulking fiancée. "You know we’re welcome on game night, or any other group thing. You just don’t want to admit that Spike isn’t the Antichrist in black leather, that’s all. It better not be the whole ‘he’s a demon’ issue, mister, ‘cause you’re marrying into the clan."

"Ex-demon, An. You’re an ex-demon. He’s still the same soulless, evil, annoying lecher who’s been sniffing after Buffy for the last couple of years. You can’t trust him and I hate how Buffy’s always over at that crypt of his. I mean, An, did you even hear that sentence? CRYPT. Humans are only supposed to be in crypts when they’re dead, not playing silly games with the undead. I get that he did a good thing there with Glory but it doesn’t change anything. That chip comes out and we’re not playing games, we’re take-out!"

Anya gave her man a look bordering on disgust and sighed. "You can try to convince yourself of that Xander. Meanwhile I’m at risk of losing half my wedding party if you make them mad enough. Just who’ll be my bridesmaids? I suppose I could ask Halfrek, but I have my heart set on a big wedding and one vengeance demon in a bridesmaid dress is NOT a big wedding! If I’m going to spend my hard-earned money on a big shindig, I want all of our friends there to help me spend it, just like in the magazines. You’ve got to try to be nice, Xander, or no more special games of our own. I mean it! I absolutely will not dress up like that Romana woman when you put on that long scarf and ask me to call you the Doctor!"

"An, wait! I’m sorry, cupcake. I’ll be nice to Deadboy Junior. Can we use your closet for a TARDIS?" Xander trailed after his girlfriend with an eager
expression on his face. Time enough after games to go back to hating the Bleached Wonder. Right now Xanderwanted to grab some jellybabies and eat them off of his sexy baby’s luscious naked body. "K-9! Fetch my scarf!" he ordered his imaginary robotic dog.