Dear Airhead,

It has recently come to my attention that my underage daughter has been visiting your site reading the garbage you try to pass off for literature. I don't understand why with as much pornography as there is everyone why someone feels they must write about it too and I'm extremely pissed off that you do not keep underage children for accessing your site to read the junk you post. Isn't there enough violence and sex and agression in the world already without influincing kids with this junk? You should at the least lock your site and track ip numbers so you can at least make sure that children are not reading that kind of stuff.

Dear Madam (?),

     Since you did not sign your post, I'm not sure to whom I should be addressing this to so forgive me if you're a Sir, rather than a Maam. I'm sorry if you caught your daughter reading content that she should not be but my site as you call it is a community journal through an online blogging service. I can no more restrict access to who reads it anymore than you can other than to restrict all my posts as Friends Only (which I do) and monitor anyone that decides to join (which I have) and even then, there is no guarantee that they are still of age. If you would like, I could get one of those age identifiers where you have to put in credit card information which is then cross-checked by Equifax to be assured of legal age. I could get one of those as long as you wouldn't mind paying the $125+ for the monitoring per year which I refuse to because even then there are still ways around that. All a kid has to do is register with their parents' information and credit card number and voila, instant access.

     There are disclaimers on my site and on the things I publish. There is only one-other place I have published and that site has a large number of authors and readers alike and the writers, just like I do, adhere to the honour system as well as the site's owners and maintainers. We all have put up ratings in addition to warnings about content so you know exactly what kind of story you are about to read BEFORE its read and we all ask that if you are not of legal age, to please do not read. Tracking IP #s to my knowledge is illegal unless it's for purported purposes of business and even then, most internet services use proxy servers. Besides, telling me the routing number to your computer still wouldn't tell me your age.

      Lastly, I find it highly unlikely that your daughter has read anything off of my fic community for two reasons. #1 It's been locked pretty much since I created it in October as I am still preparing content for it and #2 No-one has joined it as of yet (reason as to why see #1) and all the posts on there are locked except for this introduction post which you've responded to.

     Now, after all of that, there are ways to restrict access to sites so you won't have to fear your daughter reading content that you do not approve of. There is also software you can buy/download that does the same thing. I suggest you have a talk with your daughter about what is and is not acceptable behavior rather than bashing me or anyone else that chooses to write whatever it is they wish to write, no matter how 'violent' or how much 'sex' is portrayed. It's called the First Amendment.

 I wish you the best.

 Desiree Hannagan

maybe she should be monitoring her daughter's activities instead of preaching her arse off?   oh and if she writes back  *grin*  I can give you some porn site addresses you can send her to...  *snicker* 

 ROFL - Shadow is evil!  A very good answer, Space. Nicely done.

  That would annoy the crap out of me, too.  If she doesn't like what her daughter was reading, that's her own fault, and her own problem.  She can't put blame on you, or tell you not to write it.
 

I know! That pisses me off to no end, cause parents want to blame everyone but themselves for not keeping track of their own damned children! They blame video games and shit, but who the hell bought the brats those damn games in the first place, huh?

Ironically, today there was a news story about a kid doing something and people blaming it on something they saw on the web, and I was just like "And where were their parents when they were doing all this?"

If you can't trust your kid with the internet, don't let them use it. And in today's world, you can parental block channels. Video Games do not make people violent, but if you don't like them, don't buy it for them then bitch. And just overall, keep an eye on your own damn kids and don't rely on other people to do your job for you. I'm not a mother, I didn't get myself pregnant, and I'm not going to do your job for you.

Sorry, end rant. LoL

Ugh! That just made me feeel kinda bad at first because I'm a Mom with young boys (7 & 4) and was like "I'd be upset too" because my 7 year old is a computer wiz and he's online regularly so at first I started writing a leter of apology. Then I thought about the steps I did take to keep minors from reading and again thought of my son who already knows not to go to improper sites nor to click on any add ons or links/banners or any pop-ups and site that he did go to that had pop-ups were barred from my computer by my pop-up blocker. Other than his yahoo games or Nick Jr or Playhouse Disney, he doen't surf the net. Firstly, he always asks if he can use my computer (since I accidently broke his monitor and have to buy him a new one) and he always tells me what for and that is exactly what he does. (He likes going to Yahoo games and he plays the single player games because people tend to annoy him by talking when he just wants to play). He has his own account on my computer and I check the history every time that he's been on it and hes never done anything other than what he says he's going to. And then I thought if my 7 year old has more common sense than her daughter and me, as a Mom pays more attention to what my son does online whereas she obviously doesn't much, I said screw that! I got irritated and wrote back.

I'm not one of those people that blames everything wrong in the world today on everyone/everything else. Sure the media/entertainment/advertising industry has some responsibilty on some level but they are my kids and it is up to me to raise them with the values and ideals they should have and try to shield them from whatever I don't deem acceptable for them. When I bought them a gamecube off e-bay it came with 5 games... 2 of which I did not want them to play so I simply took those games out of the box when it got here and put them away where they could not find them and that was that.

What I find most amusing is how ignorant this person has shown him or--more likely--herself to be.  Not only is it fairly common knowledge that her "suggestions" are either impossible or illegal, she has shown that she has no parenting skills whatsoever by allowing her underage daughter unlimited access to the internet.  She also has no apparent grammar skills.  If she writes again, though I very much doubt it as this has the feel of an immature and cowardly complainer, you should suggest she educate herself in general in addition to internet security.

*is deliciously evil* 

hey I coulda suggested some really gross sites.... like cranial-rectal insertions... cause that twit needs to get her head outta her ass...

(is in a foul mood)

I was actually contacted by an underage reader last night...She told me She's been reading NC~17 fic for over a year and she was only just 13... To say I was shocked is an understatement. I blocked her from my contacts list at my IM provider, but there's no guarantee she won't continue to read my fic. Told her she was breaking the site rules by saying she was over the age of consent to read NC~17's and she didn't seem bothered ...I also to her she shouldn't be contacting strangers over the net and she told me her parents knew she did it.... How irresponsible can they be to allow such a thing?  I monitor all the access my kids get to the net and I check the internet cookies on a regular bases...I'm not saying my kids are inoccent their not, but they know I can track where they have been to,so keep to the rules if a site says it contains Nc~17 stuff they leave the site. And kids are wizards with computers these days if they want to get around the parental locks and passwords they can. See it's mainly about educating them not to go to the restricted sites...If parentsdid that, then maybe we wouldn't get angry emails from them tell us what we should and shouldn't write....And if we should post it ....

Now ends my rant......

Space - don't feel bad.  These are adult only sites and this woman has totally abrogated her responsiblity to supervise her kid's activities.  Would she let her go for a walk to the park after dark or get in a car with a stranger?  The internet is a very dangerous place for kids.  If she doesn't want her kid reading porn and she can't trust her to behave, there's a simple solution.  Get rid of the computer. 

You did fine. 

Okay and this is funny after my rant, but I started reading Anne Rice and Romance novels when I was 12.... and was having cyber sex when I was 15 *blushes and grins* And my only gripe, is how I could have liked Anne Rice because much EWW... sorry if you like her.

Oh... and my mom did know about the Anne Rice and Romance novels (not the cybering of course) I mean, my mom took me to the library then let me rent the movie when it came out... and led to this funny incident when I was checking out once and the elderly librarian looks at me all "Does your mom know you're trying to check this out?" I just went "Yeah." Then turned to my mom and held up the book and shouted across the library "You know I'm getting this, right?" lol

Huh. It sounds like the kid's mother is a sexually repressed nut job who is trying her best to make sure the kid turns out to be a prude. Naturally, 13 year olds are going to be curious about that kind of fiction/fanfiction. As long as you have a disclaimer on your stories (which you do) then your responsibility on the matter is ended. If the woman is so concerned about what her child is reading she should install some governing software on her PC so her child cannot access adult material.

Sorry you're having to put up with that muck; I know how frustrating it must be.

Well as for the woman's reaction, that was uncalled for. And she should have been watching what her daughter was/is doing on the internet. Your reply was good. I wonder if she caught her reading it here and then said it was your LJ. Or maybe she is reading your fics and got all twisted over the sex and used her 'child' as a smoke screen to send the post.

But as for the age of children and reading anything online, maybe its just me but I feel its based on the maturoty level and understanding between parents and children. I'm not saying I would want my oldest (nine) to go and read smut or anything else. But I can say for me, when I was 13 my mom let me watch R rated movies, heck I even watched Eddie Merphy Raw and I think I was in the 5th grade, so I was 10. I did go around cursing and things. I didn't utter my first curse word until 9th grade no joke, and didn't start having sex til marriage, ROFL.

But if the parent knows what their child is reading online, and say it was one of my NC-17 that's their perogative.

I know someone already mentioned getting rid of their internet access but how about only having one computer that is in the family room. That way there is no privacy when your child is on the internet. I didn't have a private computer until I was 19 yrs old and my Dad had left to live overseas while I took care of the house. I was in college.

Now were my parents strict? No. I grew up listening to Ozzy, Motley Crue, and Metallica. When I was 10 yrs old my parents took my sister and I to our first concert. It was Bon Jovi with Skid Row as the opening act. My Mom used to sit and watch horror movies with my sister when we were younger. My sister loves horror movies (still does) and I used to get nightmares so I didn't watch them. I've said before that I was reading fanfiction when I was 16. I used to read Vampire Chronicles fan fiction when it was still up and if something on the archive I went to said it was NC-17 I didn't read it. It made me uncomfortable. The computer at this time was also in my Dad's office. It was the only computer we had.

Now I don't have kids but I still remember my mother's family warning me that Ozzy was evil (this was in the mid to late 80's) and that I should turn the t.v off if his videos ever came on. All this did was make me wonder what the big deal was and when the video for "Crazy Train" came on I watched it and wondered why they fussed over it some much. My parents talked to us and told us that what we saw in those videos were fake, that they were just acting. I believed my parents. We also had computer and video games as well. When my Dad was home he sat and played them with us. Hell my Dad still plays video and computer games. 

 I believe that if you actually disipline your kids and talk to them then you shouldn't have this problem. Kids will censor themselves if parents do not make such a big deal over things. My sister and I did and so did my husband and his brothers. They lived in Holland where the t.v shows everything. Naked bodies and sex meant nothing to them because it was a normal thing to see. If they didn't like it they changed the channel. Neither my husband or I turned out to be morally corrupt people.

 This lady(or guy) should watch their own kids and stop blaming other people because they were too lazy to watch their children.

And now I'm all peeved damn it! People like that lady or guy drive me nuts and this rant is by no means directed at anyone here. This just comes from a disgruntled heavy metal fan whose favorite music has been repeatedly blamed for the actions of idiots the world over. I'll stop now.  :grr:

   BTW, the guest reply way above was mine.  lol.  Wasn't logged in.

  But truth be told, I'm not surprised at all that alot of readers are under age.  I started reading fics like these and cybering at 13, when I first really started paying attention to the computer.  I can't really complain about that, because now at 19, I think I'm a better writer for it.  

  Of course, I can understand that others wouldn't want their children reading things like that at that age.  But still, that is completely be parent's responsibility, not writers.  You can't tell a writer of erotica to stop publishing their books or magazines because your kid snuck one.

TwilightChild

If so, playboy would have went out of business a looooong time ago, lmao

OMG! You've read some of my stuff?!? :O

My reply would have been as follows (not nearly as nice as yours Space):

To the person who chose to procreate:

I am not a net nanny.  It is your job, not my job to monitor what your child reads.  I personally do not like children and I shouldn't have to be bothered with taking care of yours.  I choose not to have children so I don't have to deal with this crap.  Perhaps you should have chosen the same if this is such a horrifying responsibility for you.  

I am not forcing your child to read my fiction.  Why are you trying to force me to babysit your child?  There are places where the adults hang out both in real life and online and we should not have to make our lives PG just to keep you from having to exercise any kind of effort in monitoring your own spawn.

We live in an adult world, not a child's world.  The internet is also an adult world.  A VERY adult world.  And I highly doubt that my fiction is the worst thing they've been exposed to if you can't bother to lock down and monitor internet usage in your own home.  Has your child taken you hostage?

It is not my job, nor my responsibility to try to make the entire adult world "child friendly"  It is your job as a parent to keep your child out of adult areas.  If you don't like this responsibility, don't have children.  

Sincerely,

Me

Okay, who's willing to bet that the "child" in question is at least thirteen years of age?  In the words of Sammantha from "Sex and the City,"  "That woman needs the stick out her ass and a d*$@ in her c**@$!$ pronto!"  Whatever- you can't blame strangers for your lack of parenting.  And seriously, fan fic, or just reading adult themed stories in general can sometimes be very imformative.  Let's face it- parents don't talk to their kids about sex, and they "learn" (and I say that word lightly) from their idiot friends, thus knowing nothing when it comes to the real deal.  I swear, if it hadn't been for "Sex and the City" and fanfiction, I'd be beyond lost... or at least, horribly mis-imformed

LOL @ Zoe and Scarlet

My letter?

Dear Whoever.

Sod off. You don't want your "child" reading this stuff? PARENTAL LOCKOUT, RETARD.

DMW.

I'm really not very nice.

It's the parent's resposibility to police thier children not you. Either by using blocking or monitoring software or my sisters solution of putting the computer in the living room where what's on the screen can be easily seen.

ladycat713