She found herself walking on the beach at sunset. Or, it could have been sunrise; she couldn't really distinguish which one it was. The point was the sky was tuning that pretty orange color that only comes twice a day, at sunrise and sunset.

Buffy felt the softness of the sand as it cradled her feet. She could smell the salt in the air and feel the gentle mist from the waves on her face. It was cool and comforting. Like he had been.

"Buffy?"

She turned and saw a small flicker of light coming toward her. Sunset, she thought. It must be sunset here; otherwise there would be no need for candles.

"Mom?"

Her face glowed a little. Buffy wasn't sure if it was due to the candlelight or the fact that she was dreaming.

She was dreaming. But how could she have fallen asleep when everything was so horrible on the outside? How could she be so selfish? He wasn't here anymore. She shouldn't be dreaming about beaches and her Mom and candles, not when he wasn't there to share it with her.

Joyce smiled, "Oh, Sweetie he's here with you," she winked, "I made sure of it."

"But, I saw it. He's dust. I know it."

"Honey, let me show you something," she said as she knelt in the sand. Buffy watched as two large circles were drawn, one next to the other, in the sand, "You see the point where the circles overlap?"

"Yeah."

Joyce nodded, "They're separate but they're together, too. At that one point, they exist together. They need each other; otherwise the circles wouldn't be complete. Understand?"

"No."

Joyce sighed, "Okay, let's try it another way," she said as she blew out her candle.

"But, Mom, now I can't see you."

"Buffy, you don't need light to see me. It's always twilight here. Didn't he tell you not to use your eyes?"

"Yeah, he did," she whispered, choking on her tears.

"I know. That's good advice, Sweetheart. And that's why I gave you both a little gift," Joyce hugged Buffy giving her a little kiss, "I knew this was going to be hard, on both of you. So, I did what I could to help."

"What gift, Mom?"

"It's just a little surprise. You had your gift. I have mine. I love you, Buffy."

Buffy felt a kiss brush her cheek as her mother disappeared.
***************************

Spike paced outside Buffy's room. He wasn't sure what would happen once Buffy opened her eyes and saw him. Would she recognize him? Would she cry? Would she scream? Or, would she stare off into space, too far for him to reach? Had Drusilla's last act been to do something he had sought to do, but thankfully had neither the inclination, nor the strength anymore, to accomplish? Had Drusilla finally killed Buffy Summers?

He was unprepared for just how ill the idea of her death made him feel. As he stared at her diminutive frame lying in the bed with tubes and wires crisscrossing every which way, he tried to gather the courage to go in and see her.

At the factory he'd been running on instinct. It was animal fury that had driven him then. Even things he should have taken pleasure in, the throttling he'd given Angelus, had been without thought. If it hadn't been for Bit, Angelus would be dust on a concrete floor right now.

Spike wondered if Angelus knew just how close he'd been to crossing a line. He wondered if Angelus knew that Dawn had saved him. When Spike thought about it, he knew that Dawn had saved him too. It wasn't that far of a jump to just letting the fury take hold. If that had happened, no one would be safe.

As he watched the two girls he loved more than his existence, the ones he loved, and prized even more highly than his own soul, he wondered why he still cared for them. It didn't make sense to him since he didn't have a soul to tell him they mattered, but somehow they did. He still cared. And, if it were possible, he cared even more than he had before the soul stood in the place of his dead heart. Something in him still burned, like a tiny candle flame, for them. Something kept him warm. He didn't know what it was, but he knew that without it, he wouldn't be entirely whole.

Dawn came out of the little room. When had she grown up? "How is she, Dawn?"

"I think she's sleeping now. You can go in to see her, if you want to."

"I can't Bit," he choked, "not like this."

Dawn took hold of Spike's hand, which still had Buffy's blood on it, "I don't really think she'll care what you look like, Spike. Just go in and be with her. That's all that matters."

He shook his head, suddenly feeling exhausted, "That's not what I meant, Dawn."

The pain in his eyes made Dawn want to cry. She knew he was feeling the loss of his soul now. She could see that he was drowning, and Buffy was the only thing that would save him. But, he wouldn't take the safety she would give him for fear of dragging her down in his wake.

"Spike, take some advice from a girl who's even older than you are," she winked, trying to put on a brave face, "What you did for her proves, to anyone with eyes and even an ounce of heart, that you have more soul," she stopped when he lowered his eyes, "Hey, look at me," his gaze returned to hers, "What you did proves that you have more soul without one than that other vampire," she practically spat out the words, "does with one. Now, go in and see her. Just sit with her. She'll know you're there. You won't even need to talk."
**********************

Down in the parking garage, Angel was licking his wounds. He was glad Dawn came when she did. If she hadn't come at that moment, Angel was certain he would be headless right now.

"And, what does that say about you, Angel? The fact that he was able to control himself when he so clearly wanted to tear your head from your shoulders, I wonder, would you have been able to stop?"

"Holland, do you ever tire of pestering me?"

"It's a legitimate question, Angel."

"Angelus isn't me."

"Oh really?" Holland was incredulous, "Because lately, to be frank, the Home Office has had trouble differentiating the two. Angel and Angelus seem to be acting quite similar these days. That's why the Powers put on this little passion play. They wanted to see who really deserved the dessert at the end of the meal. Guess we all get what we wanted. The Higher Ups get their Champion," Holland sneered.

"But Spike doesn't have a soul. How does he end up with the Shanshu?"

"Oh, don't worry. He won't be getting the brass ring quite yet. But, he's on the fast track now. It won't take him long at all. Certainly not as long as it took you," he shook his head, "What am I saying, you still don't have it, Angel. And let's face it, you probably never will," Holland shrugged, "But who knows? Prophecies are such tricky things. I could be wrong, entirely. Somehow though, I doubt that I am. But look on the bright side, Angel; you'll have a nice cushy corner suite down in the Home Office just waiting for you. Nice doing business with you," he grinned as he handed Angel his business card, "We look forward to a long and, shall we say, fruitful relationship."

With that, Holland Manners disappeared.
**********************

He looked down at her sleeping face and wondered if the fairy tales could be true. Could he wake her with just a kiss? "Open your eyes. Please, Buffy. I need you to be all right," he took her small hand in his and kissed her fingers lightly. He didn't know what to say to her, so he said the first thing that popped into his head. It seemed crazy. She wouldn't go for it, he was sure of that. After all he didn't have a soul now. And, Buffy wanted to be a normal girl.

But then, what was normal anyway? Dawn was right, what he did proved he had something no one else did, "Buffy," he suddenly was unsure of his words, whether out of fatigue or just plain fear, he couldn't tell. But it was too late to back out now. The words were off of his tongue before he knew what he'd said, "Buffy, if you wake up, I promise to get you a beautiful circle of gold to fit on your beautiful finger. Just wake up, now."

When his brain processed what he'd said, he wondered where it had come from. As it turned out he needn't have looked far to find the answer, because at that very moment, Dawn and Willow were having a very enlightening conversation.
********************

"Willow, you have to help Spike get his soul back."

"But, Dawn, he doesn't need it," Willow said, smiling, "He and Buffy already share one."
*******************************

Buffy didn't need to open her eyes to know that Spike was there. And, somehow, even though she couldn't articulate just how she knew, she knew what he had done to save her. She knew just what he had lost. And she knew what he had gained.

She looked up into his tired beaten face, and asked, "You promise?"

The joy Spike felt at seeing her emerald eyes had to express itself, "Yes. I promise. As soon as you're well enough."

The reply was weak, "I feel like a million bucks."

"I love you, Buffy Summers," Spike said as he leaned over and gave her a gentle kiss.
********************************


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Buffy looked at him with such sadness in her eyes that it would have taken his breath away, if he'd had any to take. He tried soothing her hair back and tracing tiny circles on her temple, "Hey, none of that now. The light was there a moment ago. I saw it," he kissed her temple, " Where did it go so quickly?" he smiled, "You haven't come to your senses yet have you? Because I was hoping to bask in your glow just a touch longer."

"No. Spike I..."

His brows knitted with worry, "Then it must be something else. What is it?"

"Spike, Drusilla she..."

The mention of her name caused a cloud to pass over the little ray of sunshine he had been bathing in, and he felt the cold, "No talk of her now. There's nothing to be done for it. You're all that matters."

"I'm sorry. I know you loved her," tears were coming, even though her body was too far beyond them they still came. Not for Drusilla, but for him. She felt the swell of grief in him. That grief was eclipsed by his concern for her. She didn't know how she knew, but she did, "and, I'm sorry."

"Did Dawn tell you what happened?" Spike asked.

"No. I just know."

"Then you know that I would give up everything I had," Spike's voice was strained with worry and grief, " I did give up what I had, for you." He shook his head as he watched tears coming down Buffy's face, "And, I don't regret it. I'd do it all again, if I had to, for you. Drusilla doesn't even matter one jot. All that matters," he wiped away the tears as they were falling, "is you. Nothing else. You're all I know about. And, you're all that I care about. Just you. Understand?"

She nodded.

"Good. We understand each other, then," he slowly rose to his feet, "You just do your job and get well again," he turned back to look at her before he left the room, "I'll take care of everything else. I love you."

Dawn was waiting outside her sister's room for Spike to come out. She couldn't wait to tell him what Willow had told her. She was sure it would make him happy.

When she saw him come out of the room, he looked anything but happy. He looked like he'd just been handed the news that another apocalypse was headed to town, "Oh God," a look like that on Spike's face did not mean anything good. She started to panic, " Spike, did something happen to Buffy?"

"No Bit," he whispered, "Nothing like that."

"Then what? You look even pastier than when you went in there. And, believe me, that's pretty pasty."

"I believe I just asked for your sister's hand."

Dawn was confused, "You don't already have two?"

Spike was giddy and frightened all at once. He felt like the bottom had just dropped out of his world and at the same instant that that happened, he felt that his world would stop if he didn't indeed wed her, and do it soon, "No, Dawn, I just asked your sister to be my wife."

Dawn grinned, "You did?" she bounced on her toes, ready to grab him in the biggest hug he'd ever had, "What did she say?"

"She didn't turn me down."

Dawn encased him in a bear hug, "Oh Spike, that's such good news! I can't wait to plan the wedding! Oh, and the reception! We should have a big band, with lots of trumpets. Buffy likes trumpets. You do like trumpets, don't you? Oh this is going to be so much fun! I love you, Spike!"

Spike was bemused watching that wonderful, whirligig of a girl, as she raced off down the hall to spread the news, "I love you, too."
*******************

Angel was smarting. Spike had beaten him before, many times. At least one of those times had been in recent memory. But, he'd never looked murderous before. Yet with all that rage flowing through him, he'd managed to stop, not at the point of a stake or a blade but at the behest of a little girl.

Angel wondered if maybe Holland had a point. If given the same circumstances, would he be able to control his demon? Could he pull himself away from the abyss? Was the key to gaining the humanity he'd lost, not in how many people you helped, but in something else, something that was more of an idea than an action? Something Spike seemed to have an intuitive grasp on, while he'd been flailing around for almost a decade trying to find the meaning and reason for his existence, had Spike found it, without even looking?

Could Spike really be the one? In the end, would it be him?

As Angel exited the hospital, the last vestiges of night were burning away. He had much to think about. And, it seemed, an eternity in which to do so.
*******************

SIX MONTHS LATER

It was raining again, but she didn't mind. She knew what she was doing, where she was going. This was the last thing to do before she walked down the aisle, or to be more precise, the park, tomorrow night.

As she closed her umbrella, she was happy to see him waiting for her. She walked up to the pew he was sitting in, and sat down next to him, "You sure you want to do this? You can still back out you know."

He looked at her with a cautious eye, "Not getting cold feet, are you?"

"No."

"No? Let's do this then. It seems right."

"Okay," she said as she and Spike prepared to light the candles.

"Ladies first."

Buffy was suddenly overcome with emotion. So overcome that she nearly couldn't light the small wick. Her voice seemed to fail her, "For William. May he rest in peace."

Spike gave her a little nod of encouragement, and William a moment of silence, before he set the flame to glowing on his own candle. In a voice hushed by a century of history, he said, "For Edith. May she find peace and forgiveness with the angels."

They both watched as the two flames seemed to melt into one.
***********************

THE NEXT NIGHT

This was supposed to be easy. People had been doing this for centuries. So why was she so nervous?

"Willow, please tell me he didn't pull a Xander and disappear? Please tell me he's going to be there when I need him. I couldn't take it if he wasn't."

Buffy must have asked her the same question a thousand times in the past thirty minutes, George, you tell her. My legs are still sore from running out to the gazebo the last time she asked."

"Buffy," George said, patiently, "Spike is down there, giving Xander fits, asking about you every five seconds. He's there," she smiled, "Trust me. There's nowhere he'd rather be right now. Besides, if he tried to skip out, Dawn would just drag him back here, by his ear."

"Do you think he'll like the dress? I went to five different vintage clothing shops before I found one in authentic Victorian lace. I really hope he likes it."

"Buffy, he loves you. Your dress is absolute perfection," George said, "and you're beautiful. But he would love you even if you were dressed in a burlap sack!"

"Really? You think so?"

George nodded.

"Okay, let's do this."
*************

Buffy couldn't think. The minister was talking, she knew that. He was saying something important. But she couldn't take her eyes off of him. His eyes were so blue. Even in this dim candlelight, they were such a bright blue. So bright she was almost blinded by it.

She looked down at where their hands met. At the small rings they were wearing. His hands were so small. Almost too small to be as strong as they were. But, they were the perfect size for her. They would hold and caress her, and love her until she couldn't take the bliss she knew he could give her. They would protect her. They would catch her when she fell, and hold her when she couldn't stand.

A wife. She was going to be a wife to him. Something she never thought she'd get to have, she was going to have. In about five minutes she was going to be a wife to Mister William Alistair Dustin.

She almost laughed. Who knew he had a name like Alistair? No wonder he'd preferred "Spike."

The next thing she knew, he was kissing her. And it was the best kiss she had ever had, or ever would have for as long as she lived.
********************

Later, at the reception, as they were dancing their first dance, Spike smiled and whispered in her ear, "See all those trombone players, Love? Count them. There are exactly seventy-six of them. Just like I promised."

"I love you," she whispered, as she kissed his lips.

"I love you too, Buffy. So much," he answered as he swept her away, dancing on a cloud of air.


THE END