This chapter writen by Ariel Dawn

Joss owns them not us. It's true!
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“It’s missing!” shouted Willow from the basement of the Magic shop.

“What’s missing?” asked Buffy from the top of the stairs.

“The Buffy Bot! She’s....gone!” lamented Willow.

“And this is a bad thing how?” asked Buffy peering into the darkness.

“What’s missing?” asked Dawn, munching on a carrot stick and peering over Buffy’s shoulder.

“The bot!” shouted Willow again. “We have to find it!”

“Why?” asked Dawn. “I thought you hated that thing?” Dawn asked her sister.

“I do hate it.”

“But we can’t let her just roam around freely, she could get lost, or she could find Spike again,” warned Willow.

Buffy’s eyes went super wide.

“We have to find her now!”

The truth was that the idea of the Buffy Bot with Spike wasn’t really repulsive anymore as it was jealous making. Yes, she could admit it. She liked Spike. She didn’t know exactly how much, but the idea of someone or something else with him? It was a curious feeling that she couldn’t otherwise label.

“Does she have a homing thingy?” asked Dawn.

“Oooh! She does!” said Willow excitedly.

Willow rushed past the sisters up the stairs and pulled her lap top out of her bag. Setting it on the research table she turned it on and found the program to locate the Buffy Bot.

After several minutes of waiting, Dawn crunching away on her carrot sticks, Willow finally said something.

“She’s in LA.”
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Buffy stalked into Spike’s crypt. She hadn’t seen the blond vamp since she had pretended to be the bot to find out if he had given Dawn away to Glory. She felt a little bad for using him like this. Her rationale was that he commissioned the thing, it was his fault.

“Spike get up, I need you to drive me and Willow to LA.”

Spike groaned.

“Bloody hell, don’t you people ever knock?”

“No, not when your sex toy is loose in LA somewhere wearing my face!”

Spike moaned again.

“And why is it that I have to cart your sorry ass to LA?”

Buffy took a look at the prone figure on the sarcophagi. He looked so beat up, so fragile.

Buffy tried another strategy. “But I thought you liked my ass Spike?” she said all flirtatious.

Spike sat up and blinked. The Slayer, she who would kill him, was pouting at him. He had a sudden flash back to the time when they were engaged.

“Look at that lip,” he said looking at the pouting Slayer in his crypt.

“Are you gonna get it?” she asked.

Spike stared back in shock.

“Please drive Willow and me to LA?”

Spike rolled his eyes and lay back down on the tomb that he was on.

“Bloody buggering hell. Alright, I’ll do it.” Spike sat up again and looked her in the eye. “I better not regret this.”

Buffy smiled.

“You will just have to find out, now won’t you?”
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Spike groaned. He had been listening to ‘crap’ since they all piled into his car. Suddenly the song changed and the car was filled with Justin Timberlake’s voice, again. Spike reached over and ejected the tape.

“Hey!” protested Buffy. “Put that back!”

Spike just shook his head.

“I won’t be listening to your damn Timberwanker again, Slayer.”

“Please Spike?” she batted her eye lashes.

Spike rolled his eyes. That was what had gotten him in the car with the witch and the slayer in the first place. Spike rolled down the window and tossed the tape out onto the highway.

Buffy gasped.

“I can’t believe you just did that!” cried Buffy.

“Oh my Goddess!” said Willow from the back seat. “Dawn’s going to kill you!”

Spike groaned, of course it had to be the nibblet’s tape.

“Now what are we going to listen to?” asked Buffy.

“We could have a debate,” said Willow.

Both Buffy and Spike turned to look at the witch.

“Ok, maybe not,” said Willow suddenly self conscious.

As Spike turned around he dug out one of his stash of tapes and popped it into the cassette player.

Within seconds the car was filled with the sounds of The Clash.

“What the hell is this?” asked Buffy yelling over the volume.

“This is music!” said the vampire with glee.
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Willow’s computer gave them directions that confused the hell out of them.

“This is Angel’s hotel!” said Willow surprised as they pulled in front of the Hyperion. “But the computer says that Buffy Bot is here....”

“Maybe it’s wrong?” suggested Buffy.

“No, I don’t think so..” said Willow.

“Well...don’t go yammering on about the blasted thing. Let’s go and get the Bot.”

“Afraid Angel’s playing with your toy Spike?” asked Buffy. “Ewww mental image. Let’s go!”

The witch, the slayer and the vampire burst into the Hyperion hotel, startling the occupants of the lobby.

“Buffy! Willow! Spike!” said Cordelia from the desk. “What are you doing here?”

“We are missing something, tracked it here. Where’s Angel Cordelia?” asked Buffy.

“Sleeping, it’s early still for him,” responded the former cheerleader.

“We don’t really need him to find it,” said Willow, pulling out her computer again and plugging it in.

“So what exactly do you think is here? What did you lose?” asked Cordy.

Buffy looked at Spike, then Willow, then back at Cordy.

“It’s slightly embarrassing...”

“So? Tell already!”

“It’s the...” began Willow. “Wait, it’s very clearly in the hotel.” Willow wrote down some directions on a piece of paper and stood up. “Let’s go.”

Buffy, Spike and Cordelia followed closely behind the witch. Upstairs and down corridors.

They stopped in front of a door.

“This is Angel’s room,” said Cordelia.

Spike snickered. Buffy elbowed him in the gut.

“Well, no time like the present,” said the vampire quickly recovering from Buffy’s elbow. In one fluid motion Spike kicked in the door to his grandsire’s room.

The scene before them caused even Spike to gasp.

Standing before them all was the Buffy bot, dressed as Xena, holding a whip and some manacles.

In the back ground of the room, Angel was tied up with leather strips to the wall, completely naked, hard and in the confining grip of a cock ring.

“Spike!” said the Buffy bot happily. “Not so pleasant Buffy! and Willow!” The bot turned to Cordelia. “I don’t know you. You aren’t in my programming. Identify yourself.”

“Uh....What the hell is going on?” asked Cordelia, trying desperately not to look at Angel’s naked body.

“Buffy Bot, meet Cordelia,” said Willow. Willow’s eyes drifted involuntarily back to Angel. “I really can’t be here,” she said leaving the doorway and the hallway post haste.

“I’m right there with you,” said Cordelia.

Spike and Buffy watched the two girls scurry away, then turned back at the widely smiling bot, still holding the whip and manacles.

“Do you want to join us? I’m supposed to play like I’m Xena,” said the bot. “It is unfortunate that Angel is only semi conscious, all I did was enable Spike’s program #2.”

Buffy groaned. “I have no words...” she muttered.

“He isn’t big like Spike, but he’s Angel and I loved him first, even if he is small,” said the bot happily.

Without realising that she was doing it, Buffy looked between Angel’s cock, sticking out for all to see and Spike’s package, that was neatly covered up by black denim. She couldn’t deny that even as Spike was neatly covered up, she really wanted to find out exactly how different the two vampires were, and more than just size wise.

Angel shifted in his binds attempting to break free. The bot turned around and whipped the struggling vampire across the leg.

“I didn’t say you could get up,” she said harshly.

Spike snickered. Buffy groaned.

“Spike! See how I kept Angel from ejaculating? It is called a cock ring. I never used one of those devices on your very large member.”

“Willow says that there is something wrong with you,” said Buffy to the bot. “Go find Willow.”

“I am not damaged,” said the bot, tilting her head slightly. “But I will see Willow anyway. To make sure. She’s gay.”

And the bot bounded down the hallway towards the lobby, her Xena skirt bouncing behind her.

“That’s hardly fair, Slayer, taking away a man’s toy like that. Leaving the wanker to...well...wank,” said Spike, waving in the direction of his confined grandsire.

“She was your toy first Spike,” said Buffy undoing the leather strips and setting Angel free.

“Buffy...I...” started Angel.

“So don’t want to hear it right now,” said the slayer walking away from Angel, still naked and still in a very uncomfortable situation.

“Buffy please, just listen to me...”

“Ick, no, not until you do something about...” Buffy waved in his general direction, not looking at him, “that.”

Buffy turned and left the room, cringing visibly.
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“I want her dismantled,” said the slayer coming into the lobby, where Cordelia and Willow were inspecting the bot, which looked turned off. “I can’t let her get out again.”

Willow nodded.

“Why did she come to LA though?” asked Cordy.

Obviously Willow had filled in the brunette on the hows and whats of the bot.

“Angel, obviously,” said Willow.

This comment earned her a few looks of death from the two girls in the room.

“Not like that. When I deprogrammed her of all the Spike love, I tried to put in more Buffy stuff. Like memories, you know, Angel being your first ...love, and Riley.”

“So what she’s gonna go after Riley next?” asked Buffy.

“No! Of course not. I mean, I don’t know how she got out. She won’t get out again.”

“She does seem to have a healthy sex drive,” said Cordelia inspecting the bot up close. “And she looks a lot like you.”

Buffy glared at the May queen.

“The poofter is taking a cold shower,” came Spike’s voice from the stairway.

“I was trying to repress the naked Angel pictures,” muttered Willow.

“What I would like to know is what is with the Xena Complex?” asked Cordelia.

“Buffy always was his perfect little warrior princess,” said Willow.

Buffy cringed.

“Can we go now?” asked Buffy. “This trip has just been way too weird. Can we go somewhere where the weirdness is normal?”

“Sunnydale?” asked Willow sceptically.

“Where else?”
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tbc...