- Yeesh, Buffy's attitude is annoying here, I guess she hated that she made things more complicated with Spike when she wanted them to just be talking buddies. She's regretting that she kissed him… and I think she's ashamed with herself for doing it. While she is attracted to him physically, she doesn't want to consider him as romantic partner.

- I wonder what the significance of kittens in demon world. How is Shark Guy able to buy a house in Bel Air with a swimming pool using kittens?

- Aw, Buffy went to Spike's rescue, and Spike seized the opportunity to run away. :D

- ANYA: Do you think she ... walked around on clouds, wearing like ... Birkenstocks and played a harp? 'Cause those are just not flattering. You know, the clonky sandals, not a harp. (softly) I mean, who ... doesn't look good with a harp?
The others just look at her. They all look grim.

I think they wanted to smack her, I think I would've, too. "We snatched her from heaven, idiot. Doesn't matter how heaven was like. Bottom line is we were selfish jerks." This is what they were probably thinking about.

- ANYA: What? I'm just saying what everyone's thinking, (to Xander) right baby?
XANDER: You are attractive and have many good qualities.

Ouch, Xander! Yes, she can be stupid, but that was mean.

- TARA: It's totally not stupid to wonder what it was like for Buffy. But it could have been any one of a zillion heavenly dimensions. All we know is that ... it was a good place and she was happy there.

See, Xander, Tara was able to point Anya to the issue at hand without insulting her. 

- Seeing Willow the Mighty so down and hating herself after episodes of her being so full of herself is a refreshing change. I love how she went from "We were selfish" to "I was selfish." She knows she's more at fault than any of them since she had manipulated and lied to them to get them to help her.

- Xander, Tara and Anya have a point. What's done is done, wallowing in what they had done wouldn't help, they should focus on making things better for Buffy.

- Willow has always been a helpful person, doing all she can to make others happy, to fix the problems. It's a characteristic in her since high school years, and her goal to fix and help others got easier to accomplish when she grew stronger as a witch. Now it became an obsession, helping others makes her feel happy about herself, makes her realize how strong and great she is. A feeling she rarely had when she had been a high school loser. She started to neglect computers and the "hard way" to reach the goal because those were the values of Loser Willow. Magic gives her confidence and strength, it makes her the new Willow. Buffy's equal instead of her sidekick. Magic makes her feel special, to the point where helping others became selfish instead of selfless, because now Willow helps others to make herself feel happy that she did this amazing thing. It makes her feel like a hero. This is why doing decorations in Xanya's party was more about making Willow feel happy and useful than making Anya happy.

- WILLOW: Tara, I didn't mean to-
TARA: To what? Violate my mind like that? How could you, Willow? How could you after what Glory did to me?
WILLOW: Violate you? I ... I-I didn't ... mean anything like that, I-I, I just wanted us not to fight any more. I love you.

That's what I've been arguing about in early discussions. Willow's intentions weren't dark. She was selfish and lazy, sure, but she didn't intend to hurt Tara by doing what she did. She just wanted them to be happy. That doesn't mean that what she did was "okay", she had done a great mistake and Tara calls her on it:

TARA: If you don't wanna fight, you don't fight. You don't use magic to make a fight disappear.
WILLOW: But I-I just wanted to make things better. Better for us.
TARA: But you don't get to decide what is better for us, Will. We're in a relationship, we are supposed to decide together.

- I understand where Giles is coming from, he had told Buffy more than once to deal with her responsibilities like an adult, and Buffy never listened, still kept throwing them on Giles' shoulders. Giles wants Buffy to learn how to be an adult, and him staying would make it impossible, because Buffy will still dump her responsibilities on him and he's too weak to refuse helping her. I think what scared him is that if he stuck around longer, it'll be way more difficult for him to leave. He's gotta put down his foot and do what's best for Buffy to teach her how to handle real life.

- GILES: I've taught you all I can about being a slayer, and your mother taught you what you needed to know about life.

While Giles did teach Buffy about being a slayer, I'm not sure Joyce made Buffy ready for real life. Joyce had always supported Buffy with money and an open home whenever Buffy felt like coming back. Some parents have their children pay rent after they become 18 to teach them responsibility, and while Buffy came back to live with her mother, Joyce didn't ask her for rent. It's probably because they got so much going on with Glory, Dawn's keyness and Joyce's illness that it felt too much asking Buffy to get a part-time job to pay Joyce rent.

- I wish I have Willow's magic just to use it after I take a shower. It's great to just point a finger and in a second be all dried up, dressed and have your hair whatever style you like.

- I have a feeling that if Tara hadn't implied earlier that she wanted a break up, Willow wouldn't have felt too desperate to get things fixed, hence using magic. She's too blind to realize that she's hurting their relationship with it instead of fixing the situation. Her desire to have everyone happy and miserable-less is getting ahead of her rationality. I think she wants those who are upset with her to feel good about her again, she had hurt both Buffy and Tara, and by making them forget what she had done to them, they won't be upset with her anymore.

- So cute to see Anya and Tara thumb wrestling. :D

- Doesn't Spike look adorkable with his old-fashioned brown suit with a bow-tie, and a padded hat with earflaps. *hugs him*

- SPIKE: You need to give me asylum.
XANDER: I'll say.
SPIKE: No need to get cute.

Hee!

- Everybody is upset about Giles leaving, except for Anya who's finally gonna get the shop to herself and Spike who doesn't care.

- BUFFY: Sorry. Everybody's sorry. I know that you guys are just trying to help ... but it's just, it's too much. And, and I, I can't take it any more. If you guys ... if you guys understood how it felt ... how it feels. It's like I'm dying, it-

How much it sucks that when Buffy started to open up, the spell begins its effect.

- Look at the contrasts: Anya, who was desperately wishing for Giles to leave, doesn't want him to leave anymore because they're engaged. Xander, who barely noticed Willow in high school, finds her attractive now, and Willow, who used to have this major crush on Xander, doesn't find him appealing anymore.

- Another contrast: Notice how Xander and Willow are taking the vampire existence here differently from when they first learned about them in S1. In The Harvest, Willow appeared like a frightened mouse, unable to keep it together. Xander, on the other hand, doesn't show fear at all, too occupied thinking of rescuing Jesse, and with foolish bravery follows Buffy to where the vampires are. In Tabula Rasa, Willow handles the vampires' existence much better than she did in S1 while Xander passes out with fear. I wonder if the fact that Jesse had been kidnapped in S1 had everything to do with Xander's ability to deal with vampires' existence with such calmness. His loyalty, protectiveness and love for his friends are the key to his courage.

- Personal Note: I know how popular this episode is, but I have to say that it's too overrated. I had high expectations for this episode, but was too disappointed when watching it. Other than Randy/Rupert/Enya –which was brilliant and unexpected- everything else is just too fanficcy predictable and cringe-worthy.

For example, Dawn saying "I don't think I drink" because she's a teenager. Like she psychically knew she was underage.

And Tara thinking Willow's name is cute, get it? Because they're in love, so it's only logical that Tara will find Willow's name to be pretty.

And Buffy finding out Dawn's real name because she's wearing a necklace called "Dawn." Yeah, I get it, it's an attempt to make Buffy and Spike the only ones who don't know their real names. I find it lame. 

And my most cringe-worthy moment was Buffy and Dawn figuring out they were sisters because they fought. Give me a break.

- Moving on:

XANDER: Yeah, 'cause I thought you were a girl and I'd remember, but...
WILLOW: (grabs her breasts) Well, I am a girl!

This one is actually funny because it implies that Willow is the stronger partner in her relationship with Tara which stereotypically makes her the "man" of the relationship, hence "I thought you were a girl." "I AM a girl." It also shows when she offers her arm to Xander –which is the boyfriend gesture- before she corrects herself and takes his own offered arm.

- I have to repeat that Spike, Giles and Anya are the ones that made the episode. Their situation is SO wrong it's really funny and enjoyable. It's the most amusing one out of all situations, which were too dull and predictable. Xander/Willow? Already done. Buffy/Dawn? Nothing new.

- I want to quote ALL the Giles/Spike lines, they're just so quotable! Okay, I'll choose only one:

GILES: You're not too old to put across my knee, you know ... sonny. (And Spike smiles at that. LOL!!)

- Buffy without her memories jumps to save Spike just like she did when she still had them in the beginning of the episode.

- Aww, that father/son moment between Giles and Spike. Adorable!

- Another thing that annoys me about the episode is how they handled Spike's vampire nature. This is one of the reasons I've enjoyed Spin the Bottle in AtS more than Tabula Rasa. I think the way they dealt with Angel's situation as a vampire was much more interesting and real than they did with Spike's in Tabula Rasa. Good or not, Spike is a vampire. When trapped in a shop with humans, he must feel some vampire urge to bite and drink from them. It's an instinct. It has nothing to do with him being good or bad. Angel still felt like a vampire and was too conflicted about these weird feelings he's having, it was twice funnier and more realistic.

- Poor Anya, even with lost memories, her fiancé wants to leave her. ;)

- Rupy? Now I found a nickname that makes me wanna throw up more than Willow's "baby"s when addressing Tara. :D

- They kinda overdid it with the Willow/Tara sexual tension just to have Willow say "I think I'm gay" line.

- Coward Xander finds his bravery and kicks some vampire ass while Willow and Tara are busy staring into each other's eyes. Thank God Alex has Umad or the vampire would have killed him without his "girlfriend" and Tara noticing.

- Poor Dawn, watching her "parents" break up. I really like the metaphor of Willow and Tara being Dawn's parents, I like how it carried on throughout the season. Willow even mentions it in S8 "Anywhere but Here."

- Spike came to comfort Buffy and she looked away, then we see her kissing him. I think at first, she was trying to keep her solid stance, but then her sorrow over Giles leaving left her numb that she needed to "feel" again.

- This is probably the hottest Spuffy kiss in the whole show.
 

ETA: Also, if we're talking about reallism, Buffy's slayer side would have automatically viewed Spike as a threat, and not tried to protect him, or felt comfortable with him fighting at her back once she knew he was a vampire.

I guess the reason why this episode didn't touch obvious aspects -Buffy feeling her spider sense around Spike and Spike having vampire urges and desires- is because it's a comedy episode. They already have the Willow/Tara and Giles/Buffy drama to deal with.

Also, overall in season six, which for me was much of a downer, no scratch that--when I first saw this ep, I enjoyed it immensely, and it's still one of my favorites. However, I will agree that "Spin the Bottle" was a better version of "group memory loss."

Perhaps because I had high expectations for the episode, it came out disappointing. But then I had high expectations for Once More with Feeling and it didn't disappoint. Spin the Bottle was much better written IMO.

Yeah... shame she doesn't actually learn anything from this. She realizes she totally screwed up, and then decides to fix it by making the exact same mistakes all over again.

Willow seems to be blaming herself and not magic for what she had done to Buffy. She still thinks that magic can solve everything. Once we get more into the drug-metaphor, she'll realize that her use of magic is the problem.

Well, I guess that I am letting myself see more of the bad things that happen between the two characters than the good things - and I am glad that you made me think about them again. I will have to find a better way to describe their relationship.

I think what Xander and Giles feel toward Spike is dislike and inability to get along, same goes for Spike toward them. Not to mention the lack of soul and the fact that Giles and Xander aren't sure if Spike would still care after he loses his chip (obviously, Xander doesn't trust Spike fully from his conversation in Seeing Red) I do, however, believe that they can be friends when put in the right situation. Xander and Spike could have developed one in S7 if the writers had more screen time.
 

She was right to blame herself for bringing Buffy back. Once she starts blaming magic for her problems, then she doesn't have to feel guilty - it's not her fault, it's the magic's fault.

I understand why she started to think that way seeing as everybody around her seems to be blaming magic. Willow had gotten the right idea at first but then when writers and characters started treating magic like a drug, it made it seem like Willow was off the hook. I wish instead of Tara saying, "You're using too much magic," she said, "You're abusing magic" or "You're using magic irresponsibly."

I also disliked how Anya was viewed as the villain in Older and Far Away when she demanded Willow to get them out. Tara, and Spike as well, appeared annoyed with her suggestion. Everybody was treating magic like it was the real problem, when the real problem was Willow.

Still, considering what she does, it felt a little like another instance of a Scooby Free Card from consequences.

I'm not sure what the right solution is though. I think the Scoobies did fine with Willow, when it seemed like there was no chance of saving her, Buffy fought her (probably would have killed her if necessary.) But Willow was able to be reached, and obviously can be easily redeemed. Giles took her to the coven and helped her control the magic inside her, and we've all seen the guilt and remorse she felt. It wasn't the right time for her to go back to Sunnydale, but she was needed. And she was reminded of what she had done by many including Anya and Andrew.

I keep hearing about this Free Card thing directed to the Scoobies, but never really understood it. Almost all characters had been forgiven one time after another for what they had done in the show, not just the Scoobies. And the Scoobies had suffered the consequences of their actions at times: Willow lost Tara for her ignorance, Xander never got a second chance with Anya and Cordelia after he had hurt them, Giles was fired from the council for helping Buffy, and Buffy got kicked out of her house for being a lousy leader.
 

So in that sense, the Scoobies were not punished directly for what they had done, whereas the others were

Tara leaves Willow right after the spell in Tabula Rasa, which is considered a direct punishment. Xander doesn't get a second chance with Cordelia: direct punishment right after he had cheated - not to mention Cordelia's attempts later to make him feel jealous with Wesley and her spilling a few of his secrets about his family (Christmas and his father being out of job.) Buffy directly gets chided for wrong deeds like running away and hiding Angel's return from others.

Who are the others you're talking about? Anya gets away with all her murders after she becomes human, not to mention that Buffy gave her so many second chances before she had enough in Selfless: Anya had been granting wishes for months before Buffy decided to kill her. Spike got away with his betrayal with Adam, the Scoobies could have staked him by then, knowing that he's not really helpless after all, but they let him be. Tara casts a spell that went wrong to make the Scoobies blind to demons and they were almost killed, but she was forgiven right away.

The Scoobies are usually more forgiving toward others (and themselves of course), the times where they don't feel like forgiving someone is when this someone goes way out of line like Faith who swung to the evil side. Other than that, they had gave Spike a home and food when he needed it, even when they shouldn't have. They accepted Anya into the group and never threw her past in her face (except Willow for a few times). Even Faith was accepted with opened arms after she had framed Buffy with murder and molested and almost strangled Xander. They didn't send her to jail and they were there for her, but she chose  to betray them.

I was giving the long and short of it--lump sums. Either way, it still doesn't trump trying to kill all of your best friends (Willow was way closer to all of those people more than Faith ever was) and destroy the world. Sunnydale's a blip on the map compared to billions of people world wide. Also, Faith didn't need a dose of "good magic" to see the error of her ways. She was on a downward spiral and she knew it, and essentially tried to have herself destroyed ala Angel by trying to piss him off by attacking him and his people. The end result was Faith caging herself, and serving her time.

It took time for both Faith and Willow to come to their senses. Willow had told Giles in S7 that she should be killed or stripped off her magic. She did want a severe punishment, but Giles knew that she would be useful in the future and ending her life will cause the world more harm than help it. He could see the remorse and guilt in her, and that she'll work harder on being good.

Same with Faith, like I had said, she was the one who didn't want to be helped. The Scoobies did what they can to help her, but she chose evil. She realized she needed jail because it was the only way to help her become a better person.
 

After he's chipped, beyond the whole "manipulate the Scoobies" thing so that he could get the chip out, Spike doesn't do anything in s4 that would warrant him being a threat.

How about when he kidnapped that doctor to get his chip out? The fact that Spike works on getting his chip out makes him more dangerous than the Scoobies realize. You say Spike did nothing, but he kept threatening them that he'll kill them if the chip stops working. That on its own should have made them more alert, but Giles still keeps blood in his fridge for Spike, Willow wants Spike to be sheltered after he tried to bite her, and Xander trusts Spike enough to deliver him military clothes when he needs them in The Yoko Factor.

And Willow didn't? You don't think Willow's actions surpassed Faith's? Willow chose to betray and attempted to kill her friends too, and what's more wrong about the scenario is that Willow was more of a friend than Faith ever was, making her betrayal that much greater.

While Willow was dark, Buffy was willing to fight her and kill her if it was needed to happen. Willow is stronger than Buffy, so Buffy wasn't able to defeat her. Same with Faith, no one wanted to kill her, they wanted to help her, but she kept choosing the Mayor. Buffy only wanted to kill her when Faith had poisoned Angel, and her blood was the way to save his life. Even when Faith had woken up from her coma, she caused the Scoobies harm. And from S4, when they had known her as evil, they get to meet her again in S7, and other than the first seconds of frowning at her, they welcomed her with open arms.

Willow did not want to be helped either.

She got a slap from Dawn and a shouting from Buffy, then Willow revealed that she needs help and from then on, she was very serious about being good until she lost Tara, and then it all went dark for her, she only wanted to kill those who caused them pain, especially Warren who killed Tara. She didn't intent to hurt her friends until they stood in her way. When Xander was able to reach for her, all the darkness disappeared, and Willow was Willow again. She felt great remorse and wanted to be punished for what she had done.

With Xander's spell debacle in OMWF, no one even talks about him never casting spells again.

I think this is mostly the fault of Joss. Xander was his choice because then he'll get to use the "Am I your Queen?" joke, he didn't care to make a big deal out of it.

But when talking characters, we've seen how Giles reacted to Xander doing the same thing in S2, "Get out of my face." Harsh and well-deserved, so why won't Xander get another yelling now? It's obvious how much he "annoys" Giles, so I can see a talk or even a yelling after the episode ends. I think Buffy's revelation that she was in heaven had stunned everybody, and that any talk or blame to put upon Xander was postponed. The only time I remember it was ever mentioned again was Older and Far Away, where Xander tells Dawn that sometimes they cast a spell they think is harmless and then realize that it's not. He was talking about what he had done and wanted Dawn to learn from his mistake.

By contrast, Willow is obvoiusly still dicey in B8.

I don't know about that. We haven't gotten all the details yet. I see Willow trying to learn more about her powers and using Snake Lady (forgot her name) to help Buffy. I even think Kennedy knows about her. But we have to wait before making a full judgment of it. To me, Willow appears much more level-headed than Buffy, who's drowning in her responsibilities-therefore making bad choices- and she's the voice of reason in most occasions. I actually believe she's the one who'll guide Buffy to the right path in the end of S8.

It's too easy to forget how much mercy Spike got in season 4.

I honestly agree. The Scoobies are not entitled to help him at all after all he had done to them, yet they take him in, feed him and save him from danger. They pay him for helping and I think Giles wanted to make a deal with him in The I In Team, that they could be a team, but Spike vulgarly refuses.

I tend to forget it, largely because it all seems much more like a plot device (we can't let Spike get staked now) than something real. Sort of like I can't fully hold Xander accountable for the deaths in OMWF because the writers seem to mostly be using that as a plot device.

Sadly, word.

I do think that the non-Scoobies get different treatment though. It's not as stark as some have argued here. And a lot of it just stems from the raw loyalty that the core four have to each other. But there are a lot of places where it just looks bad.

I actually prefer the Scoobies' loyalty to each other than how Angel's group react to friends' betrayal. I feel for Wesley when his friends cut him off from their lives without hearing his reasons for kidnapping Connor.

Friends make mistakes, some are very major, but true friendship is that that sticks through the bad times. After everything they went through, Buffy, Xander and Willow are still together fighting the good fight.

It cast the Bangel relationship in a bad light, with Buffy forgoing her morals to attack another human being, as well as tarnishing the supposed "difference" between Buffy and Faith--if Buffy is a hero, how can she mirror Faith's actions? Faith kills her victims first as an accident, then for business, yet Buffy is prepared to kill her without labeling such an act as wrong.

I think for Buffy it was more "Faith is the reason Angel is dying, she deserves to die to make him live." If Faith didn't shoot Angel with the poison, Buffy wouldn't even have considered her.

I agree nmcil, life is S6's big bad. All the characters had made mistakes and bad choices this season.

From my perspective, Buffy's motivation and moral choice is clear - saving the life of "my boy friend" by taking the life of another human being.  Faith's history is, IMO, not part of the ethical consideration - Buffy's motivation was to save Angel by the sacrifice of Faith for her blood.  Buffy is working from extreme passion, Eros out of control.  Her moral "high ground" choice would have been to offer her own life and Slayer Blood - not as the last resort and from her failure to bring in Faith, but as the first choice. 

This is another one of those themes that viewers have very set ideas about  - agree to respectfully disagree with individual POV.