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Shadows of a Brighter Day by Eowyn315 Bronz 03/07/2015 08:09 am Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul I liked the story but I really wished you had mentioned the non-spuffy ending a lot earlier than just before the epilogue. Honestly, I probably would not have read it but that is just my personal preference. Having said that, I think you are a very talented writer. This was sad and sweet and just wonderful. I was crying last chapter because Spike and Buffy would have so little time together. Oz and Willow were so cute. It feels right to end it like this. Seeing Buffy deteriorate would break my heart. But I gotta ask now that Spike's back does Joy still go with Dawn when Buffy dies? dzio 06/20/2010 10:12 pm Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Oh God, thank you. That was an amazing epilogue and I kinda loved how it was a bit disconnected from the rest of the story, but summed it up perfectly at the same time. Also, love Oz. :) And I'm glad you didn't go on showing every inevitable step of what's going to happen with Buffy now, that would just be over-angsting and feel a bit like exploiting people's emotions. Or something. I don't like stories that go on and on about every single excruciating and ugly detail of whatever nightmare is happening, unless there's a really good reason for it. And here I think you managed to make it all poignant and tragic and really touching without crossing the line. So yeah, great job and thank you very much for sharing this. :) Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! And yeah, I really didn't think we needed to see Buffy deteriorate. I've seen fic that does it well, but I'm okay with leaving that to the imagination. Captain Sammish 05/07/2009 06:53 am Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Thanks for this! It was very lovely. Spuffy stories are my favourite right before bed! Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it! Wow! No, what I meant is WOOOOOOOOOOW! I had planned to give you a review on each chapter but I couldn't stop reading, this was just so lovely!! The Spuffy reunion, Buffy's daughter, the cancer, and the Willow/Oz ending, you made me wail like a baby in lots of chapters, and I loved how you left Spuffy in the end. You should be really proud of this one, it's amazing. Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it. :) One review like this one is worth it. I wrote this (and Ebbing of the Tide) during kind of a depressing time, so I was definitely aiming to make the readers cry with me, and so the best thing to hear is that people have an emotional reaction to it. :) Thanks again! Tanja 01/06/2008 10:30 pm Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Well, what can I say? Another great story. I loved it from start to finish, but I especially liked the moment when Spike realizes Buffy made the conscious decision to select a donor in order to have a child that looked like him and I absolutely loved the end (of ch. 7, the spuffy part so to speak)... I am not ashamed to admit that I've shed quite some tears over this one. Last thing, the epilogue. You are the best! I like Tara, but I've always loved the Willow/Oz pairing much more! I'm so happy the ended up together in this story! Thank you so much for another great, great story!!! ~ Tanja ~ Aww, thanks! This was definitely meant to be a tearjerker. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :) The Willow/Oz was fun to write - I don't do other pairings often. Thanks for the review! sta 12/10/2007 09:53 pm Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Great story. Nice way to distract from the sad ending in Spuffyville. I was fearful with your warning that you might break up Spike and Buffy in spite of her predicament - glad you left it where is was - I still think that was a sweet way to leave things with them. I was so pleased that she readily let him take on the fatherly role and even confessed about having him in mind. As a physician, I was particularly impressed with the idea of the cancer cells also having Slayer healing - You are brilliant! I didn't see that coming at all, but you are so right - it would make perfect sense. I initally had even said to myself - 'what about the slayer healing?' and your cleverness trumps any argument to the contrary. I am in awe. I love the way you didn't compromise the integrity of the Spuffy story looking for a cheap happy ending, but turned the focus a bit to end things on a happy note. Still in awe here. Thank you! I'm glad the cancer cells bit worked. I wrote this story with the intention to make people cry (it was a sad phase), so I never really thought about giving them a happy ending. :) But then afterwards, I thought it needed at least a little happy, and I'd been wanting to use that Willow/Oz idea. I'm glad you enjoyed it! the epiloque definitely lightens the tone. very good tale, very good read, thank you. Yeah. :) I thought we needed something a little lighter. Glad you liked it! awwww...oz and willow back to the monkeys.... *sniff* honestly, love, that's a brilliant piece of detail there, bringing back their original conversation about the monkey pants :P great job ending this, perfectly done, love :) Hee, how could I resist the monkeys? Thanks for the review! Glad for Willow and Oz to have a chance at happiness. I loved them both for Willow, Tara and Oz. Glad she's ending with someone as well. With this the story you were going for, it was an excellent one, just made me remeber why I don't read these anymore. Thanks Eowyn. Thanks! I'm glad you stuck it out. Great chapter. Reallt funny when Oz said he'd tried to teach monkeys to play a Dingos song. Thanks! I always giggle at that line. :) kim 08/17/2007 04:20 pm Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Awwwwwww! That's so them. I like putting Oz and Willow back together in the future, too. Thanks! I figured they deserved a little happiness. Pretty much ditto to everything Pfeifferpack said, except I would like to add a great bug: AAAWWWWWW!! to the end of mine! Very sweet! :D Heh, thanks. Glad you liked it! M 08/17/2007 02:02 pm Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul I'm a bad, rude person to have waited till the end to review but better late than never I guess. This was a great story and I love how Oz turned up at the end. He was always one of my favorites on the show. Looking forward to your next fic. Late is definitely better than never! Thanks for reviewing, I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Oh I am so Glad Willow got back with OZ, and that you didn't seem to have Buffy die. Well, she wasn't going to die within a day, lol. They still have some time left. I choose to think of it as a Spuffy ending (and mentally write in a miracle cure for Buffy *G*). The parallels are there in spades and so hopeful for Willow and Oz that I am emotionally allowing them to spill to my pairing. I'm happy Willow and Oz found each other. I always though her love life was just that....about love, not gender. That's why Kennedy was just wrong on every level. I liked this ending. In my fantasy world, Buffy lives in remission quite happliy as she and Spike raise their daughter. I'm happy. Well written and like that you left it so easy to take it to that place. Kathleen Heh, thanks. I'll just leave you to your happy place, then. An excellent ending. Thanks for the review. wonderful way to end your story - life goes on and sometimes you even get second chances - Thanks! I thought it needed a little uplifting ending. :) Timeofchange 08/17/2007 05:05 am Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Very nice. Thanks! Tamara 08/17/2007 04:28 am Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul Great ending. I always like Willow with Tara or Oz, Kennedy just seemed like a wartime romance at best . Ugh, Kennedy should be shot. I always felt like Willow was just trying to force it, because she thought she was supposed to like girls, when really Tara was special. Michelle 08/17/2007 04:20 am Epilogue: Turning a Corner in Istanbul That was beautiful. It brought tears to my eyes. I always loved Willow and Oz together. Willow was lucky to have two such great relationships. Thank you! Willow was definitely lucky... and luckier to have found Oz again! *cries* Beautiful, sad, sweet and perfect. *checks off "make people cry" on to-do list* Well, my work here is done. :) Thanks for all your reviews, and for making me the lovely banner. I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. SinisterChic 09/01/2007 04:14 am Forever Okay, you did it! You are the first fanficcer to make me cry. Wow! I feel like I should quote Spike: "I'm sorry. Or... good!" :) beautifully written sad read, thank you. Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it. This is why I don't read post NFA, no future for them. Just Spike and who ever is left. doubt if I'll read another one after this, just to sad. Since I'm not one to quite a story, guess I'll just finish up. Aww, sorry. I don't think that there always has to be no future for them (I've read some sweet post-NFA fics), but this was definitely my cry-your-eyes-out angsty story. nmcil 08/14/2007 03:11 pm Forever Very Sad work but also so very like "Real Life" works - all those stupid mistakes and regrets - all of no use whatever in the face of death - Not sure why Buffy would not go with a mystical attempt cure, as a mother that has a child to care for, it would seem like an option that would need strong consideration - Well, I will just have to wait for your epilogue see how you end this. Wonderful Piece The reason why Buffy wouldn't attempt a mystical cure is because, as much as she's matured, she's still a little bit selfish. She's already died twice, and the second experience turned out pretty awful and would make her wary of using magic to avoid death. As much as she loves Joy, I can see Buffy just wanting it to be over, instead of dragging it out and possibly causing more trauma for herself. Plus, she knows Dawn will take care of her (and now Spike, too). Thanks for the review! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Francine 08/13/2007 12:34 am Forever OMG, I think you just broke my heart. Beautiful story. I think I might have to go and cry for a minute. Aww, thanks. I did say this was going to be my "cry your eyes out" fic. Glad you liked it. awwww, so very sad :( it's sweet though that they're spending what's left of their time together...can't wait to read the epilogue, love :) Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it. :) Well, that was just depressing. Very good, though.:) The ending was perfect. Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it! JO 08/11/2007 11:39 pm Forever Excuse me while i wipe the tears from my eyes. This is a very lovely story and i'm glad you let us know in your A/N that we won't see her die in the epilogue,you see I lost my mom to cancer 7 yrs ago , believe me, I know there's no cure, and although I'm no kid it's always hard to deal, but this is a fantasy and a made up story I try not to look for RL in these fics but escape it for a little while but I understand an authors need to write RL issues sometimes , and you have done a great job with this, very sensitively done. do u get what I'm saying?.Looking forward to reading the end and more of yur fics , I loved everyone of them. Thank u for sharing your talent with us. *hands Jo a tissue* Thanks for the review, sweetie. I know it's a hard subject - one of my family members has lung cancer, which provided some of the background for this fic. I'm so glad you enjoyed the story, even if it strikes a painful personal note. Awwww, how very very heartbreaking and sad, but sweet all at once. Could almost see that, Buffy waiting below the window for Joy to come down....only, she won't be ;_; But she'll leave a part of herself for Spike to love. Poor guy, he messed up again by staying away, and I don't think he'll ever forgive himself for it. It's tragic... but at least they'll have some time together, and they won't have to wonder "what might've been." Thanks for the review! Oh I feel so sad, I wish she would let him turn her then they would get a happy ending, but she is going to let herself die, at least he now has a daughter, wonder who will keep her now. Thanks for the review. I don't think Buffy would've been happy as a vampire, even if she could keep her soul. Being turned was actually her worst nightmare, so I can't imagine she'd choose that over going back to heaven, even to be with Spike. As for Joy, Buffy mentioned that Dawn will take her after she dies, but I'm sure Spike will be around to be a father to her. kim 08/11/2007 10:22 am Forever not Spuffy but not killing anyone huh? I'm not sure where you're going, then. :P Nice touch, having the Slayer aggressiveness of her cells be just as potent with the cancer as everything else. And little Joy just coming right out and declaring him her dad...Well, Spike would watch over her even if she hadn't been something for Buffy to remember him by. And I'm sure he'll be glad to be in contact with Dawn again. Spike's gonna need ties to the world after watching Buffy die *again*. Thank you! The slayer healing's effect on the cells was something I came up with after someone said, "Wouldn't her slayer healing take care of the cancer?" Glad you liked it. I can see Spike going with Joy to live with Dawn in New York after Buffy dies. I think she needs human parents (at least so there's someone to take her outside in the daytime), but I'm sure Spike will be a strong presence in her life. LadyYashka 08/11/2007 10:05 am Forever I just had to pick today to read this. ::wipes eyes:: You certianly hit the right emotions and brought forth some rather bitter sweet memories for me. You've done a good job and it's a lovely story. Aww, thanks, Yash! I really appreciate hearing that it's affected you. *hands you a tissue* SpaceLord 08/11/2007 07:49 am Forever Well I'm looking forward to the epilogue, seems a fitting end. Thank you! The epilogue is just a story that I wanted to tell in this universe, but not directly related to the main story, so I hope you'll indulge me. :) Guh.....heartwrenching! You're killin me here. Such tender dialog between them...the regrets and the lost dreams, very tangible. Joy is adorable and obviously has been raised to view her missing father in such a way that she has pegged Spike as that man. Methinks Dawn would have a lot of trouble taking Joy from Spike when the time comes. So glad Spike snapped to the deliberation in Buffy's choice for sperm donor. Sorry this one is ending. Wonder how you'll manage to make it not only NOT Spuffy but not kill anyone?!!?!?!? Kathleen Aww, thanks for the review! Yes, Buffy has definitely considered Spike Joy's father, and has raised Joy to believe so (even if she didn't know who Spike was before this). I suppose it's nicer than telling her she's a test tube baby. I'm sure when she's older, she'll figure out that vampires can't reproduce, and that's when the therapy will start, lol. dicecanntcry 08/11/2007 05:08 am Forever Well - first off. Beautiful, beautful story. So sad and heartbreaking. Secondly. You're AN has me VERY freaked out. My first thought was 'oh god, I've missed a character death warning on the summary'. So, I went to check and... no warning. Which means, she doesn't die. Unless, of course, you forgot to add it, and if that is then case then, I'll try very hard yo forgive you, but that was a really mean thing not to put! :P Howver, I then realize you say you arn't going to kill anybody. And now I'm REALLY confused, but you say the ending wont be Spuffy. A big 'huh'. Again, I check the warnings for 'Spike/Other' or 'Buffy/Other', but... again there is no such warning. Basically, I can't cope with reading wtories where Buffy or Spike die OR where one of them ends up with someone else. If one of those things will be the epilogue, then I do NOT want to read it. I simply can't handle, and will view this story finished as of now. So, I don't mean to be a pain, but... should I shouldn't I read the epilogue? Will I survive? Thanks for the review, but wow - I never thought I'd be causing this much inner conflict! Without giving too much away, I can promise you that neither of them dies (but Buffy's still terminal, so don't expect a miracle cure, either), and neither ends up with someone else. For all intents and purposes, their story *is* finished as of now, and the epilogue is more of a one-shot in the same universe, with a character or two that we didn't see much of in the main story. Hope you'll stick around! What to say? Beautiful, heartbreaking, karmic, and full of tainted hope and possibility for the future. I've always liked the idea of Spike with a child and seeing them grow and their children and so forth. I have to admit, I've seen many well written fic where Buffy has "come back wrong" and has achieved some sort of immortality, but none where she snuffs it just like any other normal human. It's tragic that our heroine should be fated to die an ordinary death, but fitting. She always wanted normal and this way they can never bring her back. It's a fail-safe. At last, she can rest in peace. She's certainly lead a full life. Bravo, my darling. A wonderful read indeed. I wanna know what you're going to start next! Thank you, Cat, you always write such lovely reviews! After the difficult life Buffy's lived, immortality would probably seem like absolute torture to her. That's why she's okay with dying an ordinary death, rather than being turned or kept alive with magic. And I think, after everything, she deserves a death that peaceful and permanent. As for what to start next - you know I have about a million ideas. Just trying to decide which one the muse prefers! Sad chapter. Thanks for the great read Eowyn. Thanks for the review! Glad you enjoyed it. Tamara 08/11/2007 04:29 am Forever Heatbreaking update. But it does show the difference between Angel and Spike. When Angel says he'll stay forever (at Joyce's grave) he's gone by morning, when Spike says it, he's planning on sticking around to raise her child. Heh, I wasn't even thinking of Angel, but you're right. That's an interesting comparison. :) Thanks for the review! dzio 06/20/2010 09:37 pm Surprises Yup, that was much too good to be true. Eh... I get that back in a day Spike slaughtered enough people to populate a small country, but honestly, doesn't the guy deserve ANY kind of a break? And Buffy? The worst possible luck in the world, everything happening just a little to late and every other decision turning out to be one more thing to be regreted... You're gonna make me cry, I can see that already. ;) Oh, and BTW, that A/N at the end? That was EVIL. Bad, bad author. I'm really really glad I'm reading this now and not when it was first posted. ;) I did in fact write this fic to make people cry, so if I have, then my work here is done. :) *nods* Yep, you're gonna break my heart, I'm sure you are. I'm so glad they found each other though. *sniffles* Loving this story! Yes, yes I am. *hands you a tissue* Thanks for the review! Those last paragraphs were so intense and then you ended it by saying "on a happy note"...I found it funny. I'd forgotten that Willow contacted him. Hope it's something that you're going to have a cure for. I'd hate to have him be left without her again. This time to take care of her daughter and not her sister. Hope you had a fun vacation. Thanks for the review! My vacation was great. nmcil 08/14/2007 03:30 pm Surprises One thing that does come to mind is the slayer healing and the cancer - would logic suggest would suggest that Buffy would end up in some type of loop with Cancer reaches certain stage, then slayer healing powers come back into play for temporary Healing Phase - then cycle starts again - eventually her healing powers decline with age - just thinking how this might work - So a poignant piece, not only because of all the dreadful mistakes both made, but because in real life so many of us have suffered this horrible illness within our families and loved one. My own sister and our family is going through this same thing and I have lost several friends to cancer. Interesting thought on the cancer... not how I envisioned it happening, but you can see my explanation in the next chapter. :) Yeah, unlike demons and monsters, this is something that a lot of people can really relate to. Some of Buffy's condition came out of my own family's experience with cancer, so I know where you're coming from. Thanks for the review! 07/31/2007 09:47 am Surprises nmcil 07/31/2007 08:15 am Surprises just wanted to say how much I have enjoyed reading your work - spent last several nights reading your stories - and have enjoyed all of them - Like this "future life" story very much - a wonderful treatment of "lessons learned" for both Buffy and Spike - Like your mature Buffy very much - And nice to read a mature Xander as well - Hope you have updates soon and that you have a wonderful vacation - Thanks so much! Glad to hear you've enjoyed my stuff. Always nice to hear from a new reader. :) Vacation was great, but I am (reluctantly) back on land again. Thanks for the review! Now that cliffhanger was pure evil!!! Have a great vacation (you lucky thing, you)!!! Thanks! I did have a wonderful vacation. Hope you don't mind the evilness too much. :) Just what a girl needs to hear -- poor Buffy. At least she doesn't have to tell him herself. Yeah... "I only came because you're dying" isn't the most inspiring thing he could've said... but it's the sad truth. kim 07/29/2007 07:22 am Surprises And right now, Joy's gonna go "What's cancer, Mommy?" I wonder who gets custody of Joy after....or is Buffy still hoping to beat it? You haven't mentioned if it's terminal or not. I think Dawn would probably be the most logical choice - she is Joy's aunt, after all. Or Xander, though he claims to be only fit for babysitting. enjoying the tale. you enjoy your vacation, come back refreshed and with more fine chapters to read. Thanks! The vacation was lovely... though I kinda didn't want to come back... More chapters soon. Aurelia 07/28/2007 09:49 pm Surprises Vacation? You don't need to go on vacation! You need to write me another chapter. lol I'm loving this story. It's really nice and not at all like other Post Chosen/NFA fics I've read. Oh, don't worry. The next chapter'll get written. :) But I need me some sun and some sea. (And a big honkin' cruise ship with all the food I can eat.) Thanks for the review! I'm glad you like the story, and that you think it's different. I like being unique. :) Gahhhhhh...okay we need a cure pronto. Hum, maybe Spike could turn her and Willow could make sure she kept her soul...yup that would work. Excellent. Have a nice vacation. Kathleen Hmm... could be a possibility... but everyone involved would have to be willing... Thanks for the review! I did, in fact, enjoy my vacation very much. :) Vacation?! And they say Angelous is evil? Honey, if Bermuda is evil, I don't wanna be good! lol Ahaha, you heartless bitch. Love the author's note *squishes*. Mm, a good transitional chapter. I'm curious how you're going to wrap this up in a chapter or two given that I'm sure you're not done with the heaping amounts of sorrow you want to throw on them. I was charmed by the spatula bit, I won't lie. I'll never look at them the same way again. Loved Spike calling Joy Bit, as well as her head tilt when she looks at him. Maybe she got a bit of Spike in her via osmosis or something. And of course, the menton of the other women I recognized. This is an interesting verse for me just because it's so domestic. If I were to compare this to Clocks, where it's crazy action and adventure, this seems like a much calmer world where everyone has matured a great deal. You don't often see post-NFA fics where the Scoobies are just people, and not superheroes, and given my own writing, I really appreciate that. By stripping the drama of good vs. evil away, you really get to the heart of them, what makes them tick, etc. Alas, I am a heartless bitch. But I'm a heartless bitch with a fabulous tan. :) The spatula's all for you, hon. I'll never look at them the same way again, either... As for the domestic "just people" approach, I think it's interesting to strip the characters down to the bare essentials. The monsters have always been secondary anyway. And besides, I don't know how long they could keep up that lifestyle without getting burned out. If I'm going to make them all very sad, at least they don't have to thwart an apocalypse, too. :) Thanks for the lovely, thoughtful review! fnagfaceandrea 07/28/2007 07:27 pm Surprises yikes!!! loving this story Hehe, thanks for the review! JO 07/28/2007 05:58 pm Surprises Holy shit, You just left it there hanging in the air like that? , well I suspected she was ill but do you think I could persuade you to make it curable and not terminal , because from some of the the answers you've given to reviews makes me think this is not going to end well, can we have a happy ending , please? I like NFA story to end happily. Sorry, not all stories have a happy ending... it'll be more bittersweet than terribly sad, though. ach! no! oh no, buffy can't have cancer!!! :( that's so sad...it's so tragic that they're finally finding each other when she might not have much time left...and i love this older, more mature xander....great chapter, love, looking forward to more :) I think "tragic" is this fic's middle name, lol. Thanks for the review... glad you're enjoying it! 07/28/2007 04:05 pm Surprises "All these years, and he’d still almost let himself be foiled by Xander Harris." - LOL. “I know that, ’s just… feel like I shoulda known better, you know? Knew the whole time there’d never be anyone for me but you, and I still couldn’t put my damn pride away and come find you until…†- Yes, you should have known better you silly vamp! But, if you had of, we wouldn't be treated with this lovely story! :D And, so Spike knows about the cancer, ay? Good. Maybe it will help further his guilt for not going to Buffy & repeatedly cheating on her! haha. Great chapter! Looking forward to the next one :) He wasn't cheating on her... they weren't together in any sense, so it's not like he was obligated towards her. Just because he's in love with her doesn't mean he can't have sex with other people... Thanks for the review! *sigh* I was beginning to suspect at the beginning of the chap that something was wrong with Buffy and that is why Willow had phoned him, now well, I'd say it's pretty much confirmed. You're relly gonna rip my heart out here, aren't you? Still loving the angst by the way... and their reunion was beautiful, if somewhat heartbreaking. Yeah, ripping out of hearts is pretty much the name of the game... can't have a reunion without a little foreboding. I'm glad you enjoyed it! Oh, great! She's going to die? She is right, it will destroy him, if she does. Does Xander know? Guess I'd better keep reading to find out. Wonderful Spuffy moments, just how many more do they have? Lots of questions... Thanks for the review! and they still do not communicate. at least they got the make up sex out of the way, so it is time for new issues. very good read, thank you. Might have been smarter to do the making up *before* the sex, but hey, it's all good. :) Beautiful chapter. You left it a place where I completely just want more. I read a few of your fics over at Elysian Fields, and I just wanted to let you know that I love everything you've written. I can't wait until I read the next update for this story, and for all of your others! Thanks so much! I'm glad you're enjoying my stories. It's nice to hear that it leaves you wanting more. :) what does she know? what's she so afraid of? now i'm all nervous, oh that was a truly heinous cliffie, love...but a brilliant chapter, loved it :) Sorry to have made you nervous... and then leave you hanging until I get back from vacation. :) But I'm glad you liked the chapter! Oops, I guess I forgot about the sperm bit. Sorry! What can I say except that my memory's not what it used to be, lol Hee, that's okay... happens to the best of us! :) dicecanntcry 07/23/2007 01:51 am Not Like This Spike was absolutely certain he’d made the wrong decision. I don't think I've ever in my life read a post-NFA fic where the author has Spike admit he did the wrong thing by staying away and not going to Buffy. I was honestly beginning to think I never would, in fact. Bravo to you for having the balls to say Spike did something wrong. Yes, he had his reasons, he was insecure, he was afraid of what she might say. But bottom line, he made the wrong decision. thank you for letting me read that in a story. :) Glad I could hit on your one issue. :) I think whether Spike was wrong depends on whether or not Buffy really loved him... but in this case, he definitely made the wrong choice. Thanks for the review! Beautiful reunion -- and then seriously bad vibes for Buffy. What a twist! Thanks! Glad you liked it. pfeifferpack 07/22/2007 08:21 pm Not Like This AHA...my guess is that Buffy is sick and dying. I also guess that Spike will figure that out (if he hasn't already). He COULD always turn her LOL. Great update. Kathleen He *could* turn her... but I don't think either of them would want that. After having died twice, I don't think Buffy would want to artificially prolong her life... and I don't think it would be the same for Spike if she were a vampire. Darn, what now? Is the child, Angel's? Anyway, very fulfilling chapter.:) No, the child was from a sperm donor. Buffy said that in the last chapter. Besides, Angel was dusted in the NFA battle, five years before Joy was born - and he never shanshued, so he couldn't have gotten Buffy pregnant. Evil writer has something up her sleeve. Well, at least Spike had one good night. Heh, I'm evil, all right. :) Okay, reunion sex and "I love you" - good. Evil cliffhanger - bad! What's wrong with Buffy? And does Spike already know about it? Heh, I wrote this with the intention (I'm such a bad person) of lulling you into the happy reunion sex... but the fact is, they jumped right to the sex and skipped the important talking - just like they always do, and it's never led to good. Hence the increasing sense of foreboding. :) Tamara 07/22/2007 03:43 pm Not Like This I don't think he knows. Well, Buffy doesn't think so, either, or she wouldn't be having such a hard time telling him. But he obviously had a reason for coming there, which we don't know yet. Whatever's wrong with Buffy, Spike'll fix it. I have complete faith in that :P Unless it's something Spike has no control over... JO 07/22/2007 03:09 pm Not Like This Wow whatever it is their both hiding it sounds pretty bad, I trust u to make a happy ending for all involved, I'm just glad it's not icky O/C's. I wouldn't put too much trust in a happy ending, if I were you. Right from the beginning, this was meant to be an angsty, heartbreaking fic. Oh no what is wrong with Buffy and can it be solved. More please. Thanks for the review! Pshhh, so much for happy romps in the sack. Looks like Buffy's got death nipping at her heals, or maybe a dogging degenerative illness. Do you think perhaps Spike showed up because Willow called him to say that Buffy was dying and he should go to her? Man, that's a tough sitch any way you slice it. She's going to have to tell him that baby was meant to be his. He didn’t understand the woman she had become, couldn’t read her the way he used to. Oh, oh! Is that my influence? I recognized the phrasing =D I'm sorry, did I just hear you use the word "happy" in conjunction with this fic? You must have me confused with some other author. :) And yes, I took that line from our email conversation... might be some other things you recognize in the next chapter too. :) Thanks for the input! kim 07/22/2007 06:01 am Not Like This She's dying, and let me guess...he knows. You'd think that Slayer healing would prevent a serious illness at her young age.....will he make her last days wonderful, or will she want him to turn her so they can stay together? Her poor little girl... Well, slayer healing didn't seem to help her when she had the flu, so probably a rapidly progressing disease might move too fast for her slayer healing to take care of it. I'm back to wanting to bang their heads together! LOL Communication, REALLY not one of their strong points. I love that she picked someone as close to Spike as she could as Joy's father. And Dawn married a Watcher! Cool. lol Haha, that feeling never really goes away. They always manage to do something stupid. :) That makes a whole lot of sense. Trying to replace him with some who might look like him and would always be her's. Their going to have a long night. Excellent chapter. Thanks! Buffy never had anything to remember him by... now she has Joy. :) good for buffy. have to start somewhere. good read, thanks. good for buffy. have to start somewhere. good read, thanks. Thanks for the review! Caroline 07/18/2007 03:31 pm Regrets I've read your stuff on Fanfiction before and just stumbled upon this site. This is so good, please continue. Thanks! Glad you've found my other work! wow....so intense, and yet such simple, profound wording...i'm loving this, pet, it's amazing :) *hugs* DoS Thank you! What a lovely thing to say. :) The gulf between them seems pretty big just now. Might seem that way, but I think they're closer than they think - because essentially, they feel the same way about each other, loving them and thinking they're not loved back. Oh, thank GOD! Never thought that I'd be so grateful for sperm banks :-P I was so sure that Buffy had been married and divorced or something. Guess I just to conclusions just like Spike. Should have known that you wouldn't disappoint :-) Teehee, I'm glad you're relieved. Thanks for the review! JO 07/15/2007 03:55 pm Regrets I love this story , my fave 's are real angsty stories and anything post chosen , seeing red and NFA , I'm glad it turned out to be a donor and that It's still all about him. Now on to the Spuffiness? Update soon. Well, this is definitely angsty. :) Glad you're enjoying it! Ah - she caught him. I'm so glad. But it seems like they have a way to go before things work out. Things ARE going to work out, aren't they? *glares fiercely* Me? Let things work out? I think you're missing the part where I'm evil. I avoid happy endings like the plague. ;) kim 07/15/2007 02:33 pm Regrets Yep, so them......trying not to hurt, trying not to be hurt, having no idea of what the past ten years has done to each other.... It's nice that Dawn has a family. They're quite the tragic couple, aren't they? But yeah, at least Dawn is happy. :) Great chapter. Wonder what Spike's response will be? That's a good question. :) Thanks for the review! time of change 07/15/2007 01:45 pm Regrets I always look forward to reading work, and this story is no exception. Great job! Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it. :) Tamara 07/15/2007 08:16 am Regrets Loving all the outer and inner dialogue in this chapter. Interesting place to leave it. Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. As for where to leave it... I'm a little bit evil. :) Oh lovely.....Buffy is going to actually verbalize! YAY! Hope for the pair yet. So glad he let her catch up to him and I am delighted Joy is a donor baby (hope she shared with Spike how she chose the donor..he'd be touched). Kathleen I think this may be a first for Buffy, the whole verbalization thing. :) Whether she tells him how he picked the donor or not, it may be apparent once Spike gets a look at her. :) It's lovely to see a matured Xander, and I'm glad that he was able to find happiness. Am intrigued by Joy, I am sure all will be revealed in future chaps. LOL Run FAST, Buffy! Thanks! I like making Xander a nice guy... he takes a lot of character abuse in Spuffy fics. :) Funny to see Xander in this light. Healed and feeling for the blond thorn-in-his-side. Guess he's all grown up after all. Who's Joy's father, some one-night-stand? I can't see her falling in love enough to have a child with anyone? Great read, Eowyn, thanks. I like seeing Xander mature... I always thought he had it in him. :) And no, I can't imagine Buffy falling love with anyone enough to have a child, either. oh i love the picture you've painted of xander, all grown up and mature and understanding, and plausibly executed to....oh i so hope she finds spike! it's heartbreaking to think that she's just got him back, just to lose him again :( Thank you. :) I thought it was time we make Xander a nice guy! BT_ 07/09/2007 08:08 pm Healing Hearts OK, I can't decide to be really happy that we got such a beautiful chapter or annoyed that we didn't find out anything about Spike!! Loved your matured Xander! Hmm... I'd go with happy, since we'll find out about Spike soon enough. :) Thanks for the review! I'm actually sort of pleased to see that Buffy and Xander have patched things up and he found a bit of happiness. Xander was never really a character I rooted for or gave a lot of thought to, but seeing him mature and become a thoughtful and responsible adult is just as plausible as seeing him broken and bitter. It could have gone so many ways for him. I'm a bit skeptical about what the whole deal is with her kid. I don't really see Buffy being a good or stable mother, so that sweet mommy exchange seemed a little too easy. I bet you'll dump us on our asses with some wicked plot twist. In the mean time, run Buffy! Xander was full of it when he said to go after Riley, but Spike is worth it. Hopefully he's gone on foot and she won't have to make a running leap for a helicopter. I don't think Buffy would be that bad of a mother... after so many years, she's matured enough that she's not the same twenty-year-old that stumbled through caring for Dawn. Of course, knowing them, they probably have much bigger problems than parenting issues. :) very glad to read of a mature xander and not the jealous little boy of canon. goodread, thank you. Thanks for the review! Glad you liked it. I'm glad that Xander is not the baby's Daddy (whew!). I'm certainly reminded of Xander's little go-get-Riley speech from "Into the Woods." I'm glad that Buffy has a daughter to love if she's been without Spike all of these years. I must admit that the idea of either Buffy or Spike with anyone but each other tends to frustrate me, and generally, I just have to stop reading so that I don't get all riled up. But now I'm all intrigued to see what happens, so I guess I'll just have to bite the bullet, and try not to think about it :-P Hang in there... I'm not a big fan of Buffy or Spike with other people, either. :) Thanks for the review! So I wonder who her father is and where her father is. I hope Buffy does find Spike. more please. love it Thanks for the review! sour 07/05/2007 11:15 pm Healing Hearts nice chapter, who is the father of joyce? where is spike? Can't wait to read more please ýpdate soon Thanks for the review! Aurelia 07/05/2007 10:36 pm Healing Hearts Awww, I love grown up, supportive Xander who finally gets it. Yeah, I like him, too. :) You scared me half to death there. When she woke him up, I thought Buffy had married Xander. That was sort of the plan. I like to fake people out. :) Gah! *crosses fingers for Buffy* She's a fast runner, but I'm sure the luck won't hurt. :) Ana 07/05/2007 01:51 pm Healing Hearts run, Buffy, run... write, Eowyn, write!! Heh... I suddenly feel like I'm in a Dick and Jane story. :) MOa 07/05/2007 12:08 pm Healing Hearts really good story! Thanks for the review! REALLY want more *G*.....(sorry, I hate when I get guilted for my story updates but I simply mean this really hits my buttons for some reason and I'm loving it). Love mature Xander. I think unlike Joss' comic versions of post Chosen/NFA the characters were headed this way on screen. Xander showed potential for finally growing out of his immaturity and desire to bully after he really lost Anya and Buffy had her epiphany at the end there.....maturity was happening and your story reflects THAT...what we saw the seeds of on screen. Bring it on! Kathleen Aww, I'm glad you're enjoying it. I agree with you about Xander's potential... he could still go in that direction in the comics. That's only about a year after Chosen, whereas this fic is way after that. Much more time to mature. :) Love how she and Xander had bonded. Knew he would have to grow up some day. Poor Spike, jumping to conclusions too quickly. Can't wait to see what will happen, and if Buffy will get to him in time. Thanks for the review! I always liked Xander, and figured he could be a good guy given the chance. kim 07/05/2007 06:56 am Healing Hearts Interesting.... So who's the father of the kid? Isn't that the burning question? :) Tamara 07/05/2007 05:45 am Healing Hearts I'm glad Xander's grown up. I had a horrible flash at the beginning that he was the kids father. Did the father die or leave her? Is it evil that I want Spike to make things incredibly difficult for her since she was with the Immortal scumbag? Horrible flash, you say? That *may* have been intentional. ;) And yeah, it is a little evil to want Spike to make things difficult, considering she dated the Immortal ten years ago... bygones, you know? Sometimes you just REALLY want to bang their heads together! This is one of them. LOL Fabulous story, sweetie. Am loving the angst. Someday I'll write a fic where their heads actually DO get knocked together. :) Hee. Now that was a surprise. I don't blame him for going. I know i wouldn't want to see her with someone else if I was him but what is the real story behind this? Very well done, thanks. Yeah, poor Spike, jumping to conclusions. Thanks for the review! Spike's a presumptuous ass. And apparently time hasn't remedied their inability to communicate. They both make assumptions and create expectations for the other, assuming that they'll make the first move. It seems these ten years have been a series of missed connections. It's strange to think of Spike so cut off from others, so isolated. He always was such a vibrant individual, so to see him sink so low into apathy is such a surprise. I like that you've brought in the idea of survivor's guilt and the trauma of life on the edge. Frankly, they all should have some serious mental disorders. And best of all - why did Willow call him? I think the fact that Spike was always so vibrant is what makes the change so stark. It obviously takes something huge - dying in one apocalypse, and then being the only survivor of a second - to change him. Also, remember that he was the first one to volunteer for a suicide mission when Angel asked... that doesn't put him in the best frame of mind going into the battle, plus survivor's guilt on top of that would make him a very different person. Why did Willow call? Well, you'll have to wait and see. :) Okay - perfectly understandable reaction - and you just broke my heart! Aww, thanks for the review! :) That was incredibly mean. Only an update will bring you forgiveness. Wow, you drive a hard bargain... next chapter will be up as soon as my beta looks at it. :) sour 06/26/2007 08:10 pm Out of Place Great story can't wait to read more Thanks for the review! TwilightChild 06/26/2007 07:27 pm Out of Place Awww, poor Spike. Buffy's a mom. That's cute all on its own. Can't help but wonder what's going on here. I do believe the story has caught me. As horribly as she took care of Dawn, I feel like, with some maturity, Buffy would make a good mom. Glad to hear the story's hooked you! oh no!!! he should wait!! so much has changed, who knows if she's even still married at all? how very tragically sad this chapter was!! looking forward to more, love :) Aww, thanks... I think "tragically sad" might be the theme of this fic. :) Glad you enjoyed it. OH no, please no. She is married and has a child, why would Willow contact him about Buffy. Spike is so hurt right now but in a way it is so his fault for not telling her and disappearing. MOre please There are plenty of reasons Willow could've called him that didn't involve him and Buffy getting back together. But of course, that doesn't stop Spike from being hurt... Aurelia 06/26/2007 07:32 am Out of Place *sigh* Nothing is ever simple between those two. Always waiting until its too late or jumping to conclusions. But if it were easy, it wouldn't be as interesting. :) sad and beautiful read, thank you. ten years, nothing changed, they still do not communicate. Thanks for the review! Always jumping to conclusions. Buffy's gonna be pissed Spike pulled an Angel on her and decidedd to leave because it was best :P Hmm... thing is, I think Spike left just as much for selfish reasons as "because it was best." He's seen all he thinks he needs to see - and he doesn't want to wait around to get hurt any more. Crying here, for both of them. I've a feeling it's not as cut and dried as Spike thinks but can't blame him for thinking it is. It's true that she NEVER came to him and he shouldn't have always had to be the one chasing her, especially after the uncertanty and mixed signals of those last years. No, Buffy should have been the one to go to Spike for a change if only to say, "Hey, good job in Sunnydale. Glad you are back. I've missed you. I meant it." She didn't and that "proved" to him that he was right in the Hellmouth....sigh.... Looking forward to more of this one. Want to know about the child and her daddy. Hope it's not a Shanshued Angel *G*. Kathleen It seems like they're both in the exact same position - waiting for the other to come to them, and assuming that not coming means no longer loving. And no, it's not Shanshued Angel... Angel's definitely dead. Buffy said it in the first chapter, and Spike's pretty confident that he is now the prophecy's "vampire with a soul" - so he really did just dust in the NFA battle, never to return. (I thought the Angel-haters would be more excited! lol) BT_ 06/25/2007 10:48 pm Out of Place GAH!! Stupid Spike! Not entirely unreasonable, but stupid nonetheless. What if the man in the photo just DIED or something, and Buffy needs him? sheesh. Great story. Love the twists. Nicely written. more? Well... you know Spike. He's still just as impulsive and rash as he always was. Thanks for the review. daniel_nieves 06/25/2007 09:28 pm Out of Place This chapters a bit sad, but i can't wait to keep reading. Thanks. :) This really ought to have a tissue warning or something, because it's probably the saddest fic I've ever written. kim 06/25/2007 08:33 pm Out of Place Ohhhhh, how sad!!!!! So, Willow asked him to come....for something Buffy needed? And there's a daughter and a wedding picture? Time moves fast for humans, Spike....we move on things quickly, unfortunately. *hugs* Yep... ten years is nothing in the scope of Spike's lifetime, but we humans (especially Slayers with an abbreviated life span) have to make the most of what we've got, so it would make sense for Buffy to be more "moved on" than Spike. Married or not, though, it was pretty clear in the first chapter that she's not over him... Tamara 06/25/2007 08:13 pm Out of Place Please don't tell me she's married! I can't imagine Willow would call him to got to Buffy if she was. You never know... maybe Willow didn't intend it to be a "let's get back together" meeting... Stupid, impetuous, silly vampire. Haul his arse back to Buffy's! Interesting take you have here on a Spuffy reunion. Growing old stories are always a bit depressing to me but you have my curiosity piqued. Thanks. I'll be honest, I started working on this because I was in a really depressing mood, so I wasn't exactly playing to the puppies and Christmas crowd... Gah... WONDERFUL!! Fabulous angsty start. I love it. Off to read some more. Hey, hey. Just noticed I never responded. :) Thanks for the review! I have to say, rarely, do I read a post NFA fic. Two or three is all but I love you're writing so much I thought I'd give it a try. Took me by surprise to see that it's finished already. Guess that means I get to finish it this evening. Yes, why now? Glad she's had to carry around the guilt of those last words to him. Now to get going with the rest. Thanks! I'm glad you decided to give it a try. reading this has been on my to-do list since i found out about it, and i'm thrilled to finally have a little bit of time to sit down with it. i've wanted to wait until i was really sure i could pay good attention, you know? i'm already in love. what i love most is that you've written something so wrenching without pushing. buffy's account of the l.a. battle, and of finding out that spike was blinked out again and she'd been left entirly out of the loop, is held up by a steady foundation of details--the unknown dead she felt responsible for in l.a., andrew's broken nose, the fact that every day he didn't come for her. and now that he's back, she's excersizing this numbness to try to protect herself from the possibility of so much pain. of course she is. spot on. Wow, thanks! I'm glad you were able to really spend time reading it, and I'm thrilled that you liked it so much. :) Nice to see you over here! What a great start to this. I think one of the most effective things about this intro chapter for me was the setting itself. I really like stories that take Buffy and Spike out of a familiar setting, and the snow here almost felt like a third character. They're meeting on unfamiliar ground in unfamiliar weather, both strangers to each other after so long. It surprises me that Buffy would have mourned for him so acutely for so long, but i'm sure that will be explored more later. Who knows what she's been up to these last 10 years. Thanks... I actually played around with a few different ideas for a setting. I picked that cemetery in London because I've actually been there - one of my friends lived in Highgate. Also, it doesn't snow much there, so when it does, it's special. Reader stamps her foot. Bad Spike! Bad Spike for staying away? At least he's back now... I thought I read this before but I didn't love it. Thanks for the review! Angi 06/25/2007 10:05 pm Snow Falling on Gravestones Love your story very much, but Spike is being an egoistic, self-centered Uber-asshole. I hope Buffy runs right after him and kicks his ass. He can´t be the big no. 1 in her life immediately after staying away for 10 (!!!) years, so he has to leave? Moron. Well, you don't know what Willow told him on the phone. You don't know what he was expecting. Clearly, he had an idea in his head of what Buffy's life might be like now, and the idea of her having a family shocked him. Nell 06/22/2007 01:15 am Snow Falling on Gravestones Fantastic. I especially liked the way you ended the flashback-y sequence. Very Buffy. Thanks! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! great start, thank you. "But why?" should be an enjoyable read to find out why he is back now. and will buffy tell him the truth? That's the question of the day, isn't it? Thanks for the review. :) ok, edge of my seat here - don't leave me hanging! :) Your beginning has amazing promise. Can't wait to see it fulfilled. Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Hmm, why didn't Spike ever seek her out? Or did he, but wasn't allowed to see her? So many possibilities. Nice beginning, looking forward to reading more. We'll find out the answers soon enough! Thanks for the review. :) Can't wait for more. Buffy is a mature woman now and not such a little girl with little girl dreams. She has the benefit of being able to see the treasure she had and didn't appreciate. Look forward to them finding each other again and doing it right. I can't blame him for not going to her....she gave him no real reason to believe those words (not in the space of time he had to digest them) and nothing afterward to indicate they were meant. Angel chiseled away at any confidence he might have had that she ahd meant those words and the Immortal sighting (no matter the comics say it wasn't her they thought it was)capped it. Spike finally took her at her word that it would never be him and you can't blame him for that. This is very, very promising and I am stoked! Kathleen Thanks for the review! That's a pretty good list of reasons for him to not find her. Next chapter we'll get into Spike's history, and find out what he was thinking, staying away for so long. Off to a wonderful, angsty start, E. I'll be looking forward to the next chapter. Me and the angst are good friends on this one, that's for sure! Thanks for the review. :) wow...you've really captured buffy's hurt and confusion and finally resignation over the past decade....very well done, love, i've thoroughly enjoyed this first chapter...looking forward to more :) Thank you! The past ten years have been difficult for both of them. I'm glad you liked it. B 06/17/2007 02:04 pm Snow Falling on Gravestones That kinda broke my heart (in a good way, I guess). And I don't know why. I actually shy away from post end of series fics, but I saw this was by you and I had to read. It was of course, wonderfully well written and got me hooked straight away. Cannot wait for more. Aww, that's sweet, B. Glad you gave this one a shot - I hope you enjoy it! *But why?* Why indeed? I'm hooked! Glad to hear it! I always like 'em to come back for more. :) kim 06/17/2007 09:02 am Snow Falling on Gravestones Ooo, interesting.... And I like that Buffy's been grieving all these years, finally getting that her cowardice cost her what she truly wanted in life. Good question, though.....why now? I think Buffy's learned a pretty good lesson... question is, what will she do with it now that he's back? Thanks for the review! Hmmm, and what has everyone been doing in the intervening time?? Will Spike tell his secrets?Looking forward to more. Thanks! Not going to bring in everyone, since this is essentially about Buffy and Spike, but we'll get a glimpse of some of the others. :) Tamara 06/17/2007 07:43 am Snow Falling on Gravestones Great start . I can't wait to see where you go with this. And one of the things she might have done wrong was kissing Angel and then there's taking up with the Immortal after all the grief she gave Spike about normal.Maybe he's back because he wants closure. Yep... kissing Angel can't have been a good thing for Spike to see... but we'll find out soon enough his reasons for staying away - and his reasons for coming back. Thanks for the review! Wow! Great start, Eowyn. "L’Oreal Iridescent Blonde" indeed :) Really like how you pushed this so far into the future. Such a great concept and execution. Can't wait to find out how much Buffy's changed. Well done! Thanks, LB! Having it so far in the future gives me plenty of time to work with for all the things that have happened in between. Plus, it makes it more heartbreaking how much time they've wasted apart. cooncat1122 06/17/2007 05:25 am Snow Falling on Gravestones Good start. Why is Spike back? Looking forward to more. Thanks for the review. I think that's the big question here, isn't it? Why is he there, and why now? | |||
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