Good chapter.

Love it ^_^ Great chapter. Very emotional.

i am hoping this chapter is a beginning for a fresher less bitchy buffy. thanks.

Awesome write! I really love the little sisterly bonding moment there at the end. I wish Buffy would talk to Dawn more. It's not like she's some little kid. Also, what IS that song? It sounds really good, I'd love to hear it. This chapter was just...awesome. I'm glad that Buffy has really been forced to think.

Great Chapter - thanks much for the update -

Perfect ending to a great chapter. Super job:D

Buffy's really struggling with her feelings in this one...but it seems like her empathy for Spike is growing. "But this – it was awful, knowing that that was how Spike felt about her all of the time, that the way she’d reacted under the spell was what he longed for from her." Lovely chapter, as always! Alia

I like the newer, more mature Dawn. Now if she could teach some of it to Buffy.

I knew those SAT scores weren't a fluke. She does have a brain! And, hey, she's using it. Now if she could just get over this idea that Angel and Spike and any other vamp are interchangeable, it'd be perfect. Or at least happier all 'round.
Also, the bit with Dawn at the end, that was nice. And I don't like Dawn so go you.

uh-oh.
Is it TARA that's summoning demons? I'd never thought of her. But that might just be a red herring, too.
Can't wait to see where you go.

marvelous balance to the last chapter. so sure buffy sees many of the things angry spike mentioned as true. dawn's hug was well timed, and needed. thanks for another very good read.

Fascinating, nuanced look at Buffy in this chapter. She's been trying *so* hard to pretend, and reality just keeps sneaking in there. I sort of wanted to smack her after the last chapter, but you do a beautiful job of getting into her head in this installment! I'm with Dawn; someone needs to give that girl a hug!

He’d also shattered her illusions. She couldn’t pretend that everything was okay. She couldn’t pretend that she and Spike were just friends, and that his feelings for her were just a harmless crush. And she couldn’t pretend that things would be okay if she kept her secret double life from anyone close to her.

Yep!

I'm feeling really sorry for both of them right now. But Buffy needed to know she can't play friends with someone who loves her specially if she's not ready to admit That Spike is more to her than a firendly asset.

sometimes little sisters can be nice :)....
as for spike's spell, i still don't feel like it amounted to near-rape...not when it was accidental...he didn't mean to do it, didn't mean to make her feel those things, and the impression i got was that the blue stuff being all over both of them sort of made *both* of them lose control...so it wasn't as if he was totally in control and taking advantage when he knew she wasn't herself...
i don't know, i just don't see it as really anyone's fault, it was an accident...if he wanted to use magic to make himself no longer in love with her, that was his business...and what happened beyond that was accidental...
i understand buffy's feelings better, though, after this chapter...i can see why she'd be so hurt and offended...i just hope they can work this out before they're both heart-broken and alone...
great chapter, love, and i'm really loving this fic :)
*hugs*
DoS

Great song choice. Wondering what she said to Jacob. She does have a lot of decisions to make. Spike is a big part of her life, no matter how much she tries to deny it. The Witches help some but no one can replace someone that fights every day by her side. Glad Spike put his foot down. He deserves whatever peace he can get. Thanks for updating this, Love it.

Another thought about Buffy and her eternal quest for normal.....

Aside from her relationship with Spike , I thought it was interesting that the things that were "killing" Buffy in S6 were the NORMAL problems!!!!! The bills, the responsibiities, becoming an instant mom to a teen, the dead end job, the sense of failure and hopelessness that comes from unfulfilled dreams...none of those were because she was a Slayer or because she was involved with a vampire. All those things were the "Normal" fabric of life! She had lots of reason to be crushed by them mind you....she was so young for all that.

The only things that elevated her from the oppression of all that crushing normal was her times doing her duty as Slayer and her times in Spikes embrace!

THIS Buffy doesn't get it any more than the on screen S6 one did *G*.

Kathleen

The negatives always come back to Angel don't they? Too bad Buffy had such a hard time seeing beyond the only thing Angel and Spike had in common....being a successful vampire....to seeing the differences in personalities that made the circumstances totally different. Another thing she forgot was that she was willing to continue on with Angel...even after the whole Angelus episode...if the soul would have just stayed put! HIS being a vampire wasn't the issue, just the kind of vampire he was without the soul.

Excellent update.

Kathleen

great update, can't wait to read more.

OH I love it, did she break up with Jacob, she needs to stop letting her friends rule her.

Dawn's smarter than she's given credit for.

Oh, Buffy....you make life a lot harder on yourself than necessary. I'm reminded of that Next Generation episode where the Dr. had been thinking about loss when trapped in a dimensional bubble, and so the world she saw kept getting smaller and smaller as she lost more people because the bubble was collapsing. Buffy would create the same world for herself, except that it wouldn't just be from temporary contemplation.

And when is she going to figure out that it didn't work with Angel because he was Angel?! It was a character problem, not a vampire problem.

It's another big dose of poor me, for Buffy then? You really know how to wind me up!! Top chapter!

Another good chapter -- thanks! You paint a strong picture of Buffy's mixed emotions. And she does see something in him after all. Yay.

To go back to the rape thing, Lady Yashka has already spelled out my own reply. I'll repeat it. Spike was under the spell too. If the spell hadn't been broken in time, she would have felt violated. And he would have been totally in despair about it. Don't you think? I think it would be pretty horrible to have sex with the person of your dreams only to find out that you were both under a spell and that the person you were with hated that it had happened. You have conceded that if he weren't under the spell he wouldn't have gone with the flow. Given that, I'm not sure why you portray her as the only victim here.

This is not to say that Spike isn't responsible for doing the spell. And since he's Mr. "magic always has consequences" guy, he does bear the responsibility. But your comparisons aren't apt. Willow's bad spells were doing more or less what she wanted them to do (the resurrection, the mind-wipes). The comparison with Xander is more apt. But a) I don't think Xander is a murderer. He didn't intend those deaths. So I likewise don't think Spike is a near-rapist here. and b) with respect to the responsibility for unintended consequences: multiple dead bodies is worse than a near act of sexual intercourse between two parties neither of whom have a choice.

But you capture well Buffy's response, which is to think of how it affected her, and to not recognize that Spike was as much under the spell as she was. Buffy has many admirable traits, but the ability to see things from the perspective of others isn't one of them.

You're a good writer, and like LY I hope you don't take this as negative feedback. You are portraying the characters well. I'm not sure I want Spike to end up with your Buffy, but that doesn't mean that you aren't doing a terrific job of developing the characters or writing a terrific story.

Another good chapter -- thanks! You paint a strong picture of Buffy's mixed emotions. And she does see something in him after all. Yay.

To go back to the rape thing, Lady Yashka has already spelled out my own reply. I'll repeat it. Spike was under the spell too. If the spell hadn't been broken in time, she would have felt violated. And he would have been totally in despair about it. Don't you think? I think it would be pretty horrible to have sex with the person of your dreams only to find out that you were both under a spell and that the person you were with hated that it had happened. You have conceded that if he weren't under the spell he wouldn't have gone with the flow. Given that, I'm not sure why you portray her as the only victim here.

This is not to say that Spike isn't responsible for doing the spell. And since he's Mr. "magic always has consequences" guy, he does bear the responsibility. But your comparisons aren't apt. Willow's bad spells were doing more or less what she wanted them to do (the resurrection, the mind-wipes). The comparison with Xander is more apt. But a) I don't think Xander is a murderer. He didn't intend those deaths. So I likewise don't think Spike is a near-rapist here. and b) with respect to the responsibility for unintended consequences: multiple dead bodies is worse than a near act of sexual intercourse between two parties neither of whom have a choice.

But you capture well Buffy's response, which is to think of how it affected her, and to not recognize that Spike was as much under the spell as she was. Buffy has many admirable traits, but the ability to see things from the perspective of others isn't one of them.

You're a good writer, and like LY I hope you don't take this as negative feedback. You are portraying the characters well. I'm not sure I want Spike to end up with your Buffy, but that doesn't mean that you aren't doing a terrific job of developing the characters or writing a terrific story.

"She’d wanted to be just friends – to keep him tethered, but at a distance."

In my opinion, this would be why most people are not very sympathetic to Buffy in this story.

Buffy knew Spike was in love with her, but still wanted to "be friends" and talk about the new guy she was dating. She wanted Spike to baby-sit Dawn while she was out on her date, patrol for her when she was "busy with her boyfriend", risk his life for her and her sister, but have no chance of ever getting her love. Buffy expected Spike to be perfectly alright with this arrangement, because it wouldn't "complicate" her "normal life."

And on a side note-wouldn't the spell Spike performed affect them both? You have it written like it only affected Buffy, and because of this she's the wronged party. I'm just really confused. The spell went wrong, and yes, Spike shouldn't have tried to have one done, but it backfired on him too. Overall it was an accident.
I'm not questioning why Buffy was upset, her reaction was very in character for her. I guess I just don't see it the way you've implied it. I don't know. :shrug:

I still love this story, and you've done a beautiful job of writing it. I don't want you to think I'm being too harsh. (cause if it comes across that way, let me know. I certainly don't intend for it too.) I just wanted to explain how I saw things.

Still wonderful story, and even with the urge to slap Buffy, I still wouldn't want you to change a thing.

Buffy's illusions needed shattering.And thinking that trying to maintain a relationship with someone who wasn't part of the supernatural world without them finding out would be uncomplicated is just delusional.

Poor Buffy, it seems that things are difficult for everyone, lol. I love your writing so much. You capture Joss' characters so well. Thank you for sharing this story with us :) .