*1*

Resting on the hot dusty ground, Buffy stroked Drusilla’s hand rhythmically, watching as the two alpha males attempted to work together. They had been lumbered with one another’s constant company for over a year and had argued and fought over everything imaginable. After a century of disliking someone, it apparently didn’t matter how dire the situation, Spike and Angel were going to disagree about it.



It was always enjoyable for the ladies to sit back watch their partners bicker and argue like school children over the simplest of tasks. Except this task wasn’t simple at all. This was the hardest thing Buffy had ever experienced and she knew that her old life was waiting for her somewhere up ahead.



Somewhere up there was her friends, her Watcher and most importantly, her Mom.



The cavernous shell of a building they were digging themselves out of was simply enormous. She had never realised just how big the library was when there were no stacks or books in it. She really hoped this was the right Hellmouth, it didn’t look like this last time she saw it.



Watching as the vampires in front of her showed off their muscular bodies she smiled at Dru, licking her lips in anticipation.

Freedom was just around the corner, she could almost taste it.



“Oi!” Spike caught sight of Drusilla and Buffy relaxing and ogling his half naked body while he and the poof worked themselves stupid shifting rubble. “Get your pretty little arses over here and help.” He grumbled, chuckling and poking his tongue out at Buffy.



Taking her time getting up and pitching in, Dru dragged Buffy with her, ignoring the grumbling and complaints she muttered perfectly audible for all three vampires to hear.



They had been digging their way through tonnes of rubble for days, working their way upwards, huge lumps of charred fleshy substance and chunks of concrete filled the hole that was the entrance to the Hellmouth.

The last leg of their never-ending journey was finally over. They were free of hell, free of the endless rigmarole of fighting and hiding. Free to live their lives once more.



Finally breaking free of the rubble constricting their path, the two sweaty and filthy vampires led their ladies through the opening in the wall where a door used to hang and into the school, rushing to Buffy’s aid as she choked on the fresh air. The sweet sensation of cold refreshing oxygen breathed in for the first time in over a year was simply too much for Buffy’s lungs to take. She had been breathing in stifling hot sulphur poisoned air for so long. The charred smell of the air was nothing in comparison to the nauseating scent where they had come from.



Pushing away their attempts to help her, Buffy snarled in warning. Both males knew not to invade her personal space uninvited.



Leading the way down the charred corridors, Buffy gazed in amazement at their surroundings. When the hell did the school get burnt down?



“Pet?” Spike stepped into line with her, keeping her pace, “Isn’t this your school?”



“Looks like when I burnt down my last school.” She mused, stepping over more chunks of rubberised charred flesh.



“Smells disgusting.” Angel groused, stepping through what used to be a doorway and into the night. Following the Poofter out, Spike escorted the ladies across the wild unkempt grass and towards the town.



“Where is everyone?” Angel wondered aloud, scanning the streets for a sign of life.



The entire town seemed to be deserted. There were no people, no cars, no anything. It was eerie to see the place so silent.



“Oooh, pretty little girl.” Drusilla giggled, rubbing circles on her temples as she danced along the street in front of them. Coming to the corner the foursome stopped, slinking instinctively into the shadows as a group of soldiers complete with camouflage gear and weapons ran across the road. A group of people walking round a deserted town at night dressed in scraps and rags would stand out like a sore thumb if there were anybody around to notice them.



“What the-?” Buffy was cut off by Drusilla’s excited squeal. Peeking her head around the corner to see if she had spotted anything anyone else could see, Buffy frowned at the sight before her. Zombie creatures loped across the grass that surrounded the college campus, freaky looking demony dead people floated after them at such a sedate pace that she had to rub her eyes to make sure she wasn’t seeing things.



“Gentlemen.” Angel whispered, stepping up behind her to watch. Pulling Dru back gently, his brow knotted in deep thought.



Brooding was what Spike called it, Buffy giggled softly. It certainly was a very appropriate word. Smiling, she tried to focus on the problem at hand.



“Who’s a gentlemen?” She asked, confused.



“It’s the name of them.” Spike clarified, indicating with his thumb as they floated past in the same direction as the soldiers had gone.



“What the hell has happened to my town?” Buffy growled, taking in the deserted streets and silent night. She remembered people going to the Bronze, and hanging out late at night, was this actually Sunnydale?



“It’s quiet because the Gentlemen steal people’s voices.” Angel told her as they began to walk again, following the only things that they had seen tonight seemed a logical idea. Explaining how they stole voices and hearts made him wonder just what else had happened while Sunnydale was without a Slayer. The place could be overrun with demons and the like, with no one there to protect the mouth of hell it was a tourist attraction for anyone even remotely evil.



“Giles.” Buffy announced suddenly, stopping in the middle of the path. “We should go to Giles’ place. He’ll know what to do.”



“Think we should kill them first.” Spike muttered, pointing to the creepy Gentlemen shadows in the town clock tower.



“Check, save the day, go see Giles.” She beamed proudly, “See? I can still do it.”



“Never doubted you for a second sweetheart.” Was the only response she got as the vampires began to make their way to the clock tower.





Leading the way up a rickety wooden staircase, Buffy kicked open the door to see a dark haired girl, a camouflaged soldier, zombies and a bunch of Gentlemen things all fighting one another. Slipping through practically unnoticed she spotted the box that Angel had told her would contain everyone’s voices.

Smashing it against the wall certainly got their attention. She grinned when they rounded on her, enjoying the freeing sensation of the fight. It was the one constant in her life and she was in the best condition she had ever been, fitter than ever having spent so long honing her skills in fight or die situations.



Knocking a Gentleman away from her and waving Angel and Spike into the fray she stuffed her fingers into her ears hurriedly trying to block out the sound of Drusilla screaming.



Apparently, screaming was more effective than fighting because the heads of the Gentlemen immediately exploded leaving the walls splattered with gunk while Spike and Angel made quick work of finishing off the zombies.



“Screaming?” She questioned, slightly bemused.



“That’s why they steal the voices Buffy.” Angel repeated wearily, sitting down on a dusty box. The day she listened would be the day he took a midday stroll in the park. Seeing her from a different point of view had shown him just how infuriating she tried to be. He knew damn well there was an intelligent girl underneath the blonde exterior, just trying to prove herself to the world.



“Buffy?” An unfamiliar voice repeated. Turning her head, Buffy frowned at the brunette. She didn’t remember her at all. Watching for movement out of the corner of her eye she pivoted on the spot, knocking the weapon out of the soldier’s hand she twisted his arm until it snapped.



“Nobody messes with my guy.” She told him as he cradled his arm to his chest. “And you are?”



“You’re Buffy?” The brunette questioned, looking the small blonde girl up and down.



Seeing her nod she broke out into a grin, “G-man is totally gonna wig!”



“G –Man?” Buffy spluttered, ignoring the whimpering soldier behind her. “Who are you?”



“Faith.” The brunette replied, “The Vampire Slayer.”



“Vampire Slayer?” Angel repeated, echoed by the soldier, sizing up the girl before them.



“Yeah, and you are?”



“That’s Angel, Spike and Dru.” Buffy answered for them, taking a second to remember Kendra and finally turning around to face the soldier, “And him?” She jerked her thumb in his direction.



Shrugging her shoulders, Faith explained the difficulty the gang had been having tracking elusive military demon hunters. Pulling his balaclava away from his face she gasped.



“Riley?”



“Faith.” He nodded; his eyes round with the pain of his broken limb.



“Buffy.” She joined in, looking at Faith. “Now we’re all acquainted, can we tell me what’s going on?”



“He’s my Psych TA at college.” Faith told her, earning a raised brow from Spike. “Hey, did you say Angel, Spike and Dru?” She turned to them ignoring Riley the Psych TA slash soldier as he escaped from the tower. “As in Angelus, William the Bloody and Drusilla?”



Nodding at their monikers, the vampires stood to leave, waiting for Buffy to follow.



“Oh man!” Faith exclaimed, “G-man is gonna blow a fuckin’ fuse!”



“G-man?” Buffy repeated, not moving from where she stood while she waited for an answer.



“Giles, my watcher.” Faith grinned. Everything about the girl seemed to be enthusiastic Buffy noted dryly. “Your Watcher too.”



“Mmmm, I like Watchers.” Dru giggled, swaying side to side. Leaning against Angel’s naked torso she smiled dreamily, “Your watcher likes me.”



“I’m not sure he does.” Angel told her softly, his soul aching with guilt as he thought about the torture he had inflicted on Buffy’s watcher.



“To Giles’ place.” Spike announced a little too perkily. Grinning at his bare chest, Buffy wrapped her arm around his back, snuggling into him and walking away from the exploded Gentlemen, the ever-cheery Faith falling into step with the foursome, chattering all the way.



Promising to answer all of her questions later, Buffy found herself wishing Faith would just leave them alone, her enthusiastic questioning and bouncy personality were just too much for anyone. Especially someone who had been stranded in the bowels of hell for more than a year with just three notoriously evil vampires for company.



All she wanted was to see her mom and to sink into a deliciously hot and luxurious bubble bath. Voicing that thought aloud, Buffy blushed when Spike decided to join her, flirting shamelessly, his hands roaming under her shirt, teasing her breasts before she could shove them away in wide eyed innocence.



“You guys always walk around half naked?” Faith eyed the vampires appreciatively, licking her lips.



“When you’ve been through hell for as long as we have, having any scraps of clothing on you is nothing short of a bloody miracle.” Spike groused at the dark Slayer. She was much too forthright for his liking. He was an old-fashioned guy when it came to girls, he liked them to retain some of their mystery rather than flaunt their goods for the world to see.

Holding her hands up in mock apology, Faith continued to chatter about demons and slaying as they neared Giles’ apartment.



Slowing her pace as they descended the concrete staircase leading to the courtyard and the apartment, Buffy turned to her companions for support. She had been forced to trust them, undergoing a radical change of opinion without even realising it. And not one of her friends was going to believe her, let alone understand her.



Looking at the front door Faith was banging on she hid against Spike’s chest, grappling to hold on when he spun her around to face the bleary eyed, unshaven form of her Watcher.



“Good God. Buffy?”


*2*

Blinking at the spectacle before his eyes, Giles frowned. Was he really seeing what he though he was?

“Hey?” Buffy said shyly, shoved forward unceremoniously by what appeared to be Spike.

Spike, standing in front of Angel and Drusilla wearing practically nothing.

Like hell he was seeing this. It had to be another nightmare. His illusion was shattered when Faith barged past him into the apartment and sensing something important happening, she fled to the kitchen, watching from the doorway. This was too interesting to miss.

“Buffy?” His hand stretched out as if to touch her. Stepping forward and into his touch she smiled nervously.

“Hey Giles.” Her voice came out a croak, a lump rising in her throat and tears escaping her eyes.

Seeing his girl crying Spike growled at the git that upset her. He knew it was simply an emotional overload at being back in her world, but he couldn’t help the possessive streak that had taken over him since he fell in love with the Slayer. Well, the original one anyway.

“Buffy?” Giles repeated in disbelief. She really was here and she was alive and well. But if she was here, then so was the fiend that murdered Jenny and tortured him mercilessly along with Spike and Drusilla. What was Buffy thinking, consorting with these demons? Unless Buffy had been turned, which he highly doubted as she had arrived with Faith.

Turning to see Faith lounging against the doorframe a thin smile graced his lips. He had lost one surrogate daughter and gained another, and while he found himself fond of them for different reasons, he was proud of how he was faring when it came to the control of his second Slayer. She reminded him of the rebellious phase of is own youth, her spunk and determination alone set her apart from Buffy.

Turning back to the strange visitors in the courtyard he frowned,

“I’m sorry.” He found himself saying, “But I cannot allow myself to talk to you at this time. If you’d like to come back tomorrow?”

“She’s human you nit.” Spike growled, seeing straight through his excuse.

“Of course she is.” Giles continued to talk. His emotional distance making it hard for Buffy to stand on her own two feet. She was his Slayer, the daughter he never had and he was talking about her rather than to her. “Yes, well.” Giles blustered on, as if Spike had never opened his mouth. “Your blatant disregard for any feelings I may have no longer surprises me.”

“Giles?” Buffy’s voice was close to breaking point. She had been replaced. A new Slayer for her Watcher to, well, watch. She wondered if her mom had forgotten her as well. “I’m back.” She whispered, a lump in her throat painful and tear jerking as she considered her options.

She had never given any thought to what Giles would do when she returned. She had assumed she would be welcomed with open arms after finally escaping from hell.

It wasn’t like she had run away, or even chosen to go to hell. She had been sucked through Acathla along with Angel, closely followed by Spike and Drusilla. Forced to coexist with the vampires as she nursed her own broken heart, finding friendship and solace with Spike when it became obvious that Drusilla had claimed back her daddy.

Her tentative exploration of the vampires, their family ways and Spike’s true personality sucking her in until she had fallen fast and hard for the annoying bleached one without even realising it.

And she wasn’t even going to get a chance to explain it all.

“Giles?” She tried again, seeing through the mask of indifference that failed to hide his anguish. Watching as the door began to close she tried again, “Giles? My mom?”

Temporarily stopping her former Watcher from shutting her out she smiled gratefully at his stony expression, “Is she okay?”

“I think you had better take the time to see for yourself.” Came the hostile reply before the door was firmly shut in place, effectively shutting Buffy out of her old world, casting her away into the night with her vampire companions.

Seeing the way that Buffy had been treated by her former Watcher made Spike want to hurt the human in any way possible. The stupid bloke was far lower on the food chain than the strange family that stood before him, yet he dared to cast away his Slayer as if she were a mere annoyance in his schedule. He had stood by silently as previously requested by Buffy, but the lack of respect given to his Slayer was eating him inside, taunting him to demand the level of respect she deserved. He almost let himself act upon his annoyance until she turned to him, tears glistening in her eyes as they walked away from her Watcher, back into the night.



“Harsh.” Faith commented casually, helping herself to a packet of cookies and leaning through the serving hatch.

Ignoring his charge, Giles poured himself a large whisky, swallowing it in one large gulp he refilled his glass, allowing himself to enjoy this one.

“I suffered tremendously at the callous hands of those vampires.” He said slowly, savouring the flavour of the whisky, “I would appreciate it if you learnt the facts before you so tactlessly start endangering people’s lives and passing judgement.”

Tossing the cookies onto the counter, and not even dignifying her Watcher with a response, Faith stormed up the stairs and threw her door shut behind her as loud as she could without breaking it.

She didn’t care if she was acting like a spoiled thirteen year old, no one told her what to do. She was her own person, always had been and always would be.

She had worried briefly on the way home that she would be cast out now that the infamous Buffy had returned- but from the not so warm welcome she received, she now found herself pitying the smaller girl.

She knew all too well how gut wrenching it was to have people that you loved cast you away, to not care. She had spent a great portion of her life convincing herself that she was cared for and now she knew the brutal truth. No one ever truly cared, not really.

The Slayer in her commiserated with the other girl, she had gone missing over a year ago after a vampire ex boyfriend had reverted to his former evil and soulless self, but from the way she talked, it was not her own choice to go away. She had mentioned being dragged into hell and although Faith herself had often referred to places as ‘hell’, she was sure the older Slayer was being honest when she mentioned the hellish year she had experienced. Faith wasn’t to blame for befriending the other Slayer, the way the Scoobies talked about her she must have been up there with Mother Teresa at the top of the do-gooder’s list.

It wasn’t like she had endangered anyone, if a Slayer as good as people made Buffy out to be was snuggling up with these vampires, then it really wasn’t going to be Faith who went in guns blazing trying to kill them. She trusted the other Slayer, feeling like she knew her already from the Scoobies constant praise and casual mentions in chats. And the company she kept seemed to be pretty well house trained in the not killing the Slayer department. That was always a mark in the plus column.

Plus, those vamps looked damn fine if she did say so herself.



Listening to his charge stamping around above his head Giles sighed, sinking down further into his chair, his whisky in one hand while he held his head up with the other.

What on Earth had happened in the last twelve months to make him turn away his Slayer? He loved her like a daughter, he had been there for her like a father and her disappearance had hit him hard, making him turn to the bottle for comfort just as her mother had.

Joyce had turned to him for answers when the children had run out of excuses, not telling her anything that she wanted to hear.

When those answers had finally sunk in, she had been so far gone that she couldn’t bring herself to care. It had taken the arrival of Faith to kick start everyone into accepting that Buffy was gone.

They had all slowly accepted that she would come back when she was ready and until then, they all had lives to live and demons to fight.



The children would soon know that Buffy had returned along with the vampires that accompanied her. Faith was never one to keep a secret and he was thankful for a second that it was not him who would be forced to tell them. They would be able to make up their own minds and talk to her if they wished. He just hoped that Buffy was still on the side of good. It wouldn’t look good on him if the Slayer he lost had turned rogue and it would just about kill him if she had.

Pouring himself another drink, his eyes settled upon Willow’s purple notebook. Picking it up and idly flicking through it, he scanned the notes of all the attempts to locate Buffy, skimming past the attempts of mind control and telepathy that had not worked, stopping at one particular spell.

The young redhead had become quite adept at witchcraft over the long months that Buffy had been gone, practising anything and everything she could get her hands on. The locator spell she had attempted several months back had been unsuccessful in pinpointing anything, let alone the location of the missing Slayer. It was as if she had completely vanished off the face of the Earth.

Giles knew all too well from his Watcher training that locator spells needed to be very precise in which dimensions they searched, but the attempts of the young witch had been futile. Buffy had been in no known dimension and her friends had slowly reduced the amount of time they dedicated to finding her, finding themselves with new lives and increased responsibilities now that their Slayer was MIA. Even when Faith had arrived, ready to take on her role, the Scoobies had been insistent on helping, ‘fighting the good fight’ as Xander put it.

But now she was back, and Faith was almost certain to announce it to everyone when they met up at midday.

Checking the clock and finding the time an ungodly hour of the morning, Giles knocked back the remnants of the bottle and grimaced. He would need to write this up in his diaries before the children arrived, but before that, he wanted some much needed sleep for his mind to try to make sense of the events of the night. So many questions he wanted answers for, so many things he wanted to do over, to take Buffy into his arms and tell her how much she had been missed, to stake Angelus and the other two vampires, to make it so that she had never run away.

He had spent many nights agonising over the small things that he could never undo, things that would bring him his Buffy back, and now she had finally returned and been ready to face him and he hadn’t even asked her where she had gone to. He had taken one look at the company she had kept and had turned her away like the prejudiced old man he swore he would never become.

It was definitely time to get some sleep.

Smiling ruefully at the shut door that meant Faith had sneaked out the window, he made his way to his own room. The alcohol was fuelling his brain to come up with more and more things he regretted, replaying tonight’s events over and over until he was no longer sure of the distinction between fact and fiction. Sinking onto his bed he was asleep within seconds, dreaming of the much-awaited return of his beloved Slayer.


*3*

Wandering slowly up the moonlit driveway, Buffy glanced up at the house that loomed in the distance. Unlike the buildings either side, there were lights on and there were shadows moving across the windows.

Buffy knew there was no sure way to know how the reception from her mother would be, unless she simply went ahead and let her mother know that she had finally returned.

After being turned away form Giles’ so coldly, Buffy had wanted to slink away and nurse her battered ego before anyone could hurt her more.

Spike had refused to let her do this just yet and had picked her up and carried her halfway across town, depositing her where they now stood in front of her mother’s house.

She hated the fact that he was right. She did need to face this tonight before she could imagine the problem blowing up out of proportion.

It was only by facing her problem that things could be figured out.

If her reception with her mother was anything like her reception from Giles then she would take Spike up on his offer of fleeing the country.

She couldn’t imagine living in the place she used to call home if her mother couldn’t bring herself to want her back.

Spike was home for her now and she desperately needed to be able to tell somebody that. To hear somebody tell her that she was not crazy or possessed and to make her feel as if she was wanted and welcomed.

Rapping softly on the door she hoped that nobody heard the knock. Sadly, her prayers went unanswered as a light suddenly illuminated the porch they stood on and the door swung open to reveal a rosy cheeked, haggard looking Joyce, dressed loosely in a bath robe and clutching a bottle of sherry.

Mother and Daughter regarded each other for a long moment, each taking in what they saw in mirrored silence.

Joyce fought the urge to peer into her bottle as she swayed in the doorway. Surely she must be seeing things because her Buffy was gone. She’d run away after being told not to return in the heat of an argument over a year ago.

“Mommy?” Buffy whispered softly taking in her dishevelled appearance and her mother’s state of undress.

“Buffy?” Joyce found her voice wavering as she swallowed back the hot tears threatening to stream down her cheeks. She gulped, dropping the bottle onto the bureau behind her and reaching out a hand to stroke her baby’s matted golden locks.

As her mother’s warm hand came into contact with her hair, Buffy let loose a strangled sob and fell across the porch into her loving embrace.

This was what she had been longing for for so long.

This was everything she had dreamed about these past long months.

She was finally home, safe in her mom’s arms with her family around her.

All that was needed to complete her picture was her friends, yet she was neither naïve enough to believe or foolish enough to consider that her friends or mother would so readily accept her new vampiric family or the irreversible changes in herself.

Stepping back from her mother’s arms she smiled thinly at the clearly inebriated woman before her.

“I’m back.” She whispered half to herself. “I’m really back.”

“And your friends?” Joyce asked politely peering out into the darkness at the vampires that surrounded her porch. “Do they want to come in too?”

“That’d be lovely thanks.” Spike said softly, stepping up into the light, his sinewy, muscled frame similar to that of the young girl he wrapped his arm around. She was young and she was human, but they both knew that being accepted as a couple was the first step to getting people to understand what they had been through and what lay ahead for all of them.

“Do I know you?” Joyce slurred slightly, the daylight was fast approaching and these people didn’t look very familiar to her at all. Rupert had warned her not to invite strange people into the house if it wasn’t light outside, but surely he didn’t mean Buffy as well?

Buffy wasn’t a vampire. Was she?

“They’re my friend’s mom. You remember Spike?” She smiled gently, holding on to Spike and her mother at the same time, trying to coax her into the house, away from the coming dawn. “Spike was here before, before I-”

“Before you ran away?” Joyce laughed, a strange high pitched, humourless cackle that seemed to come from all around. The bitterness was creeping back into her voice as she muttered to herself, clearly unaware that everyone could hear her as she continued to chunter under her breath, leading the foursome into the house with her mumblings of ‘come in, come in’.

“Ran away?” Buffy was demanding as they sat down together. Joyce merely shrugged, taking in the strange appearances of her guests.

“Are you ok dear?” She asked Drusilla quietly, the strange looking dark haired woman seemed to be as drunk as she was. She was talking to her hands and gesturing wildly around the room, stopping every so often to stare at the large dark haired man next to her, as if to reassure herself that he was still there. The darker man looked strangely familiar but she could not put her finger on where she had seen him before so she continued her scrutiny of Buffy’s friends, smiling politely as they looked right back at her as if examining her as she was examining them.

She remembered that scruffy looking lean man from the night Buffy had run away. He was the vampire that Rupert had uninvited from her house after Buffy had left.

It all came back to that point in her mind. Buffy had left and now she was back with dangerous vampires for company.

“Are you a vampire?” Joyce asked seriously, staring her daughter up and down where she sat with the apparent Slayer killer.

“Mom!” Buffy was stunned. Her mother had taken it seriously after all. She had thought that she would simply deny anything ever happened like she had done so often in the past, but it seemed that she had finally learnt to embrace the truth. “No.” She said after a long pause, “I’m not.”

“Then why are you with them?” Joyce was starting to tire of this now. She just wanted to go to bed and sleep off the effects of the sherry, wake up in the morning and have her little girl back where she belonged. That’s all that she had wanted every night since she had realised that Buffy was not coming home.

“A lot has changed. They’re my family now.” Buffy said softly, not wanting to discuss it at five thirty in the morning when they had been awake for more than thirty-six hours. “I need them.” Her voice was louder, clearer and held the confidence she wished she had.

“You need them?” Joyce was confused, and for the first time in months, it wasn’t due to her binge drinking.

“I need them mom. I’ve changed. Can we talk about it later?”

“Changed? I’ll say.” Joyce muttered sarcastically, nodding in the direction of the windows. “Are they staying all day?”

“No, we’ve got somewhere to stay, thank you.” Spike interjected before Buffy had a chance to think about it. He was quite keen to get back to the mansion before the sun could rise over the horizon and crispy fry them.

“We need to be going. We’ll be back later, is that okay?” Buffy felt silly for feeling so insecure about being around her own mom, but couldn’t bring herself to think about what would happen if her mother decided she wasn’t who she wanted her to be?

“Fine, fine.” Joyce smiled widely. “I’ll let Willow and Xander know shall I?”

“Please.” Buffy said softly. “We’ll be at the old mansion on Crawford Street all day. We’ll be back when we can.”

She couldn’t wait to see her friends again, to have the chance to take part in a normal teenage conversation and just forget about the hardships and horrors of the past year. Someone to gossip with about all the things that she had seen and done and to hear how things had been on this side of Hell.

“Buffy?” Joyce swallowed hard, her mouth suddenly dry and her heart beating so loud and fast she was afraid the vampires would hear it. “I love you.”

“I love you too mom.” Buffy whispered, a lone tear streaking through the grime on her face.

Kissing her daughter goodbye, Joyce watched, with a numb sinking feeling inside her chest as Buffy and Spike wrapped their arms around each other, keeping in perfect synch with the other, darker couple as they disappeared into the darkness as the sky steadily began to turn orange.

Something told her that her daughter was a completely different person now, that she would never be little Buffy Summers again. She just hoped she was wrong.

She couldn’t bear it if she had been offered her daughter back different to how she had been before all of this Slayer business. It was Faith’s job now, Buffy was free to come home and be normal again.

Yet she knew in her heart as she finally lost sight of the foursome that there were some things that you could never walk away from. And sadly, saving the world seemed to be one of those things.

Shutting the door softly, Joyce sank to her knees, holding her head in her hands as she gazed upwards to the small, framed photograph that graced the wall behind the door. Buffy was smiling back at her, frozen on celluloid forever, the perfect image of a perfect child.

Her green eyes were wide with innocence and her blonde bouncy hair fell loosely around her shoulders. The same shoulders that now slumped with the weight of the world resting on them. Her eyes held no sparkle; her innocence was gone, replaced with a weary tiredness. Her slim figure had been replaced with unfeminine rippling muscles. Her once blonde hair tattered and ragged, an unkempt shade of straw. Her clothes had been ripped and frayed by god only knew what kind of demons she may have been consorting with.

The very same outfit she had been wearing last time she was seen.

Joyce froze, cold realisation sinking like a lead weight into the pit of her stomach.

She had been wearing the same clothes every day she had been gone. She had been missing since Tuesday, May 19th 1998 and it was now December ’99. She had been missing for 19 whole months without the slightest hint of a trace, presumed runaway by all that knew her. And nobody had bothered to question why she had felt the need to run away. They had all assumed the worst, and been wrong. Very wrong.

Buffy hadn’t run away. She hadn’t chosen to leave behind her family and friends without as much as a goodbye.

Buffy Summers would never have left home without a change of clothes and a hair brush, let alone without a note or a goodbye.

Something had forced her to stay away from her family and as her fists clenched around her sherry bottle, Joyce vowed never to drink again.

She was on a mission to find out what had happened to her baby girl.

To get answers for all the questions she had never managed to ask Mr Giles and to solve the puzzle that was her daughter- The Slayer.

The baby girl who was now a fully-grown adult, consorting with dangerous, supernatural creatures in the middle of the night and wearing the scars on her neck like medals of honour.

Yet, deep down, Joyce knew she would always be her baby.

*TBC*