Disclaimer: The characters are Joss Whedon’s.
Keep them reviews coming!
****************************
 
Spike woke first the next morning, feeling somewhat better. He noted with some dismay that he was still blind in his right eye, and his face still felt like the surface of the moon. But the pain was greatly reduced, and the burns from the crucifix seemed to have more or less vanished.
 
Buffy stirred next to him and sat up, stretching and pushing her hair out of her face. “Morning,” she said, yawning.
 
“Morning,” Spike replied, sitting up. “Feeling any better?”
 
“I’m still a little shaky,” she replied. “I never noticed how loud the world is. The birds outside sound like they’re screaming. The physical pain is a bit better though. How about you?” She noticed that his face, while still marred, was less raw and blackened than the night before.
 
“Well, still can’t see out of this side, but the pain is less for me as well,” he answered. “I guess we’re about on the same page in all this.”
 
“Do you need more blood to heal?” she asked. “I don’t mind sharing.”
 
Spike shook his head. “Maybe later. Right now, I believe you haven’t eaten in, what, 5 months?” She smiled a bit at that. “Won’t even consider your offer until you’ve had a couple of good meals.”
 
“Then come on downstairs. Because now that you mention it, I’m starving.”
 
They made their way down to the kitchen. Buffy found there was still some blood in the fridge for Spike, but apparently shopping for human food still hadn’t happened. She rummaged around and found a box of pop-tarts to call breakfast. She made some coffee to go with it, while Spike heated up his breakfast. They sat down together at the counter, both ravenous and both inclined to silence for the moment.
 
After having worked her way through an entire box of pop-tarts Buffy poured coffee for both of them. “Spike?”
 
“Yes, love?”
 
Buffy hesitated a moment, “Your face… your eye… it’ll heal eventually, right?” She didn’t want to think about him being permanently disfigured as a result of trying to help her.
 
Spike shrugged, as if it were of no consequence. “Think so. I’ve had holy water burns before. They take a while, but they’ve healed in the past. This one is worse than most, might take longer. Until then, I’ll hire myself out for horror movies I guess.”
 
“It’s not that bad,” Buffy reassured him. “Looks pretty painful though.”
 
“Won’t deny that,” he agreed. They drank their coffee in silence for a while longer. This time it was Spike who broke the silence. “So what are you going to do now?”
 
Buffy thought about it for a moment. “I need to go down to Social Services and figure out what exactly I need to do to get Dawn back. I need to see her.”
 
“How are you going to explain your sudden reappearance to the Nibblet?”
 
“Best I can.” That was going to be a challenge. “Do you have any plans?”
 
“None in particular. I suppose I should head back to the crypt.”
 
Buffy hesitated for a moment. “Spike… you can stay here for a while, if you want.” Spike’s eyes got wide in amazement – she wanted him to stay? Buffy mistook his wide eyes and quickly added, “You don’t have to of course. You’ve done so much for me and I know you have a life of your own and…”
 
“Slayer,” Spike interrupted her nervous stream of words. “As I said before - I’ll stay as long as you let me. I just don’t want you to feel you owe me anything. I did what I did because I wanted to, not because you made me do it or anything else. You don’t owe me a thing.”
 
“Then please stay,” she whispered. “I’m… I don’t want to be alone, and I don’t trust anyone else right now.”
 
Spike leaned forward and planted a kiss on her forehead. “I’m here for you, Slayer. Always.”
 
Buffy cupped the uninjured side of his face and planted a gentle kiss on his lips in return. “Thank you, Spike.” They looked into each other’s eyes for a few more minutes, then awkwardly dropped their hands, not entirely sure what had just happened.
 
“I’m, um, going to call Social Services,” Buffy said at last. “Can you see if there are any empty boxes in the basement? I want to pack up the witches’ things and get them out of here.”
 
“Sure thing, pet.”
 
Buffy looked for the number of the Social Services office and made an appointment to meet with Ms. Davis at eleven o’clock. Then she went upstairs and took a very long hot shower. She found some suitably conservative clothes and put her hair up. She went out into the hall to find Spike bringing up the last of the empty boxes he had found. “I’m off to face the Social Services demons,” she said. “Feel free to help yourself to anything you need.”
 
“Best of luck, Slayer,” he said warmly. She gave a faint smile, and turned to go. Spike decided it was definitely his turn in the shower. He found that he had to keep the spray off his burned face, as it was still tender, but the rest of him was healing rather nicely. He closed his eyes and remembered the touch of her lips on his. My God, she’s amazing. A small corner of his psyche hoped against hope that something more than this friendship they had would develop. Thinking of her hair, her scent, aroused him painfully. He stroked himself, thinking about what she must feel like, the curves of her naked body. He closed his eyes and continued watching the movie in his mind, stroking faster until he came with a sigh. You’ve got it bad, William. Just going to get your heart broken in the end. But then he thought,ah sod it. Even if I haven’t a chance in hell, dreaming won’t hurt anyone.
 
***********************
 
Buffy found herself nearly having an attack of agoraphobia upon entering the Social Services building. Her mind started screaming, too much, too many people, too bright, hurts… She dashed into the bathroom off the lobby and closed herself in the stall, leaning her head against the wall and taking deep breaths until she calmed down. She took one more deep breath, then left the restroom and went up to the reception desk to ask for Ms. Davis.
 
The matronly lady came up to Buffy after a few minutes and extended her hand. “Good to see you again Ms. Summers. Come into my office.” Buffy rose to follow her.
 
When they got settled, Buffy asked, “How is Dawn? Can I see her? Is she ok?” The anxiety she felt about her sister was evident in her voice.
 
“Dawn is currently in a group home with several other girls her age,” said Ms. Davis. “I can arrange a meeting between you here tomorrow, if you like.”
 
“Please do,” said Buffy. “I need to see her. I need to talk to her.”
 
“Tomorrow at…” she flipped through her appointment book, “One o’clock?”
 
“Yes, perfect,” Buffy replied. “What do I have to do to get her back home?”
 
“First, you need to take a mandatory series of 5 classes on parenting skills. I will give you the possible times for those when you leave today. You need to have your home inspected again, and you need to make sure there are no unauthorized adults living in the home.”
 
“That’s been dealt with already,” Buffy spoke up. “My housemates are gone as of today.” And woe unto them if they get anywhere near me for at least a month.
 
“Good,” said Ms. Davis, smiling. “You will also need to give us a report of your financial status – your income, debts, and show that you have sufficient means of support for you and your sister.”
 
Buffy’s heart sank. What means of support? I don’t even know what my bills are, how much money we have. Hiding her sudden anxiety, she replied, “Yes. Of course.”
 
“Here is a list of the times and locations of the parenting classes and how to sign up,” said Ms. Davis, handing Buffy a sheet of paper. “I’ll look forward to seeing you here tomorrow at one.” Ms. Davis shook Buffy’s hand and ushered her out.
 
Buffy kept it together until she got out of the building. Then she started shaking as she walked unsteadily back home. Where is the money going to come from? How can I do this? She walked blindly back to Revello Drive, fighting tears and panic the whole way.
 
******************
 
After his shower, Spike had busied himself packing things up in the witches’ room. He didn’t know what to do about their personal effects, but the books were straightforward enough. He finished filling the second box when the phone rang. He thought about picking it up, but decided instead to let the machine handle it. After Dawn’s recorded voice said, “Leave a message at the beep!” Spike heard a slight pause, and then “Buffy? It’s Giles… Willow told me you were back, somehow. I… can you call me when you get this?” I see. Wonder what Willow told him. Wonder if she mentioned that this whole mess is her fault. Spike frowned. He didn’t think Buffy was going to relish explaining all this to her Watcher.
 
Spike had finished another box of books and was starting in on magical odds and ends when Buffy came home. “Spike?” she called. Her voice sounded a little shaky to his ears.
 
“Up here,” Spike called. Buffy came in, looking out of breath. Spike was instantly concerned. “You ok, Slayer?”
 
“Yeah,” Buffy responded, sitting down on the bed. “Had a bit of a panic attack on the way home. Not something I’m really used to.”
 
Spike stopped what he was doing and sat down so that his good eye was facing her. He rubbed her back gently and said, “Tell me.”
 
Buffy relaxed into the feeling of that gentle stroking. “I need to go take parenting classes, which is no big deal. But I need to prove I can support us! I don’t know what kind of money we have, or what the bills are, or how I’m going to get a job or any of that!” She was starting to panic again.
 
“Shh, love,” Spike wrapped his arms around her and cradled her to his chest. “You don’t have to worry about that this second, ok? We’ll figure it out together, yeah?”
 
Buffy buried her head in his shirt and nodded. It felt good to have something solid to hold on to. She sat up after a few moments and smiled faintly. “Thanks.”
 
“No problem,” he said, running his hand lightly through her hair. “What say we get the rest of this stuff packed up, hmm?”
 
Buffy nodded, and together they spent the next 45 minutes or so putting all of Willow and Tara’s things in the boxes and lugging them downstairs. Buffy put them on the back porch and then went to call them to tell them to come get their stuff. It was then she noticed the blinking message light. She listened to Giles’ message with a growing feeling of annoyance. “They had to go running off to tell Giles right away, didn’t they,” she muttered as Spike came into the room. “Couldn’t let me just adjust for a few days or anything.”
 
“Don’t have to call him if you don’t want to, pet,” Spike said reassuringly.
 
Buffy sighed. “Might as well get it over with. If I don’t call him he’ll probably freak out and fly over here and I really don’t need another person to deal with right now.” She looked up his number on the bulletin board near the phone. “Can you… can you just stay here? I may need some moral support.”
 
“I think I’m better at the immoral support,” Spike quipped. “But I’ll stay anyway.”
 
Buffy took a deep breath and dialed the number. Giles answered on the third ring. “Hello?”
 
“Giles, it’s Buffy.”
 
“Buffy!” Giles exclaimed, the relief and amazement evident in his voice. “So it’s true. You’re back.”
 
“Guess so,” Buffy replied. This is probably the most awkward conversation of my life. “What… what have you heard?”
 
“Willow said that you came back as some sort of spirit, and that she and Tara were able to make you solid again. They said something about Spike helping you along the way, and that Dawn had been taken away. Buffy, I’d like to hear your version of the tale.”
 
“My version? Willow, Tara, Anya and Xander tried to resurrect me. Their spell didn’t work – that’s how I got to be a ghost.”
 
“Good lord,” said Giles. “Willow glossed over that a bit.”
 
“Not surprised,” Buffy grumbled. “Only Spike and other vampires could see me, and even then not all the time. Spike was trying to send me back to Heaven when the others interrupted his ritual, burned half his face off with holy water, and almost staked him.”
 
“Heaven?” Giles interjected. “Willow’s spell actually pulled you out of Heaven?”
 
“Yeah, and let me tell you, I’m really, really not pleased with her and the others right now. Coming back was… horrible.”
 
“But now you’re… yourself again?”
 
“After they burned Spike I got them to see me. I got Willow and Tara to make me solid after they brought Spike back to my place.”
 
“Spike is at your house?” Giles sounded worried.
 
“Don’t even start with the ‘he’s a vampire’ crap, Giles,” Buffy cut in. “I don’t give a damn what he is. He was the only one who could help me. He tried to get them to help Dawn, but they were too busy screwing around with magic to notice that she, oh, wasn’t going to school. He cares about me Giles. But he was willing to give me up so I could go back to Heaven. None of the rest would have done that, and you know it.”
 
Giles said nothing for a moment. Then with a sigh he said, “I don’t know what they, or I would have done, Buffy. But I’m glad you are back.”
 
“Well, I’m glad you’re glad. Not entirely sure how I feel about it yet.”
 
“What do you mean?” said Giles in a concerned voice.
 
“I mean that it was painful to come back here, Giles. I have to jump through all these hoops to get Dawn back, and everything just seems too much right now. Spike is helping me cope, but it is really, really hard.”
 
“Buffy, do you want me to come back? I could help you get back on your feet so you won’t have to rely on Spike.”
 
“No, Giles,” Buffy said. “No offense, but I just don’t want to deal with you right now. You left, Giles. You left Dawn in the care of two preoccupied witches, and Xander and Anya, who are much more concerned with each other and the Magic Box than a teenager’s needs. You trusted Spike to patrol and babysit all summer. I think you can trust him not to murder me in my sleep. Besides, I trust him, and that’s all that matters.”
 
Spike could not believe what he was hearing. His jaw was dangling open and he seemed to have a hard time regaining control of it. She trusts me? She would rather have me than her watcher? Has the world gone completely crackers?
 
Giles sounded a bit taken aback when he finally spoke again. “Buffy, I… I didn’t leave Dawn lightly. I just…”
 
“Couldn’t deal,” Buffy finished his sentence. “Yeah, I know. But right now, I’m hanging on by a thread, Giles. I just… need some time.”
 
“I understand, Buffy,” Giles said, sounding a little hurt. “You’ll call if you need anything?”
 
“Sure, Giles. We’ll talk soon. Bye.” Buffy hung up the phone. She shuddered a bit with the emotional overload.
 
“You ok, pet?” Spike asked, softly.
 
“Yeah,” she said quietly. “Could you call Tara and ask her to come get their boxes, while I go change?”
 
“Sure,” Spike agreed, although he wasn’t sure he wanted to talk to the witches either. Buffy shot him a grateful look and left the room. Spike took a deep breath and dialed Tara’s number.
 
“Hello?” Tara answered.
 
“It’s Spike,” he said, awkwardly. “We boxed up all your things. They’re on the back porch. Buffy asked me to tell you to come and get them.”
 
“Spike,” Tara said with sadness in her voice. “I’m so sorry about what happened. Willow kept a lot of the details from us. If I had known, I would never have let her try it.”
 
“Glinda, you’re a good person. You need to keep Willow grounded, yeah? She’s getting out of control. You need to get her to rein it in before she hurts someone else.”
 
“Do you… do you think Buffy will ever forgive us?” Tara asked with a shaky voice.
 
Spike sighed, “I dunno. What Willow did to her… she’s in pain, Tara. Emotional, physical, mental. She’s gonna need a lot of time. Just give her that, ok?”
 
“I understand,” Tara said, and Spike could hear that she did actually get it. Maybe she could somehow get through to the others. “We’ll come over in a little bit to get the stuff.”
 
“Thanks,” said Spike, and he hung up.
 
Buffy returned, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, carrying a purse. “I need to get some groceries. Anything you need other than more blood?”
 
“Don’t think so. Thanks, though.”
 
“I just hope my bank account isn’t totally empty,” Buffy lamented. “Haven’t really had time to look at that stuff.”
 
“Do you want me to try to straighten some of that out at all?” Spike asked. He realized he wasn’t sure if Buffy would be offended at the implication that she couldn’t handle her own finances.
 
“Do you mind?” she asked. “I hate to be all ‘stereotypical clueless blonde’, but I could really use some help sorting out the mess Tara and Willow made of the finances.”
 
“I’m on it,” Spike said.
 
“Thanks. Be back soon,” she responded. Then she turned and left.
 
Spike grabbed the remaining blood out of the fridge and nuked it, then sat down at the table with a mug of blood and the pile of bills and statements. He was no financial expert, but the girl was in trouble. The mortgage had been paid, but the utilities were all behind, and Buffy’s credit card had clearly been stretched to the maximum in order to make ends meet. For Christ’s sake, didn’t the witches contribute anything of their own? Freeloaders, all of them. Buffy’s bank account showed a large infusion after Joyce’s death – he assumed insurance money – but was now down to about $500. He totaled up the bills and boggled a bit at the number. No way she’s going to be able to pay that back any time soon. Dawn’ll be married with grandkids before she gets this all paid off.
 
Spike sat back and thought about it for a while. Then slowly, an idea formed in his head. I wonder if that’s still there. Dru wouldn’t have gone back for it on her own, I’m sure of it. He smiled, wincing a bit at the pain in his face. He might just be able to help her out.
 
TBC