Chapter 15: Connections

Another day of research, another day of thrashing demons, and they were no closer to figuring out the mystery. Buffy was starting to think maybe they’d all made too much of a little thing. Maybe there was no magical controlling force that made the Acanthia demon attack their house. Maybe it really was just a coincidence. As far as she could tell, there hadn’t been any subsequent attempts on Dawn’s life. And from what Giles had said, the Acanthia seemed dumb enough to attack the Slayer’s house and not realize it.

In fact, Buffy would have been willing to write the whole thing off as a fluke, save for an off-hand comment that Anya made one night, when Buffy stopped by the magic shop after work.

“It’s just weird, isn’t it?” said Anya. “That there’s two demons possibly summoned by someone mysterious, and we never figured out who.”

Giles glanced up from the book he was reading. “Two?”

“Well, the dragon and the Acanthia.” Everyone looked around at each other worriedly. They’d all pretty much forgotten about their dragon encounter. With all the bad blood that had resulted from it, it didn’t get mentioned much.

“Good Lord,” said Giles. “Yes, of course. The dragon would have been summoned by magical forces, using that talisman you found. Anya, do you still have it?”

Anya unlocked a drawer under the cash register and pulled out the talisman. It was a dark grey oval-shaped stone, about the size of a silver dollar, flat, with carvings on one side and a red crystal embedded in the other. Giles studied the side with the carvings carefully, and then placed it in the middle of the table for the others to look at. “I don’t know what the inscription means; I’ll have to look it up. Is there blood on that? I can’t quite tell.”

Xander picked it up and looked at it, then handed it to Buffy with a shake of his head. She couldn’t tell if there was blood on it either. The stone was too dark.

“You know who’d be able to detect blood?” said Willow.

“Does it really matter, Giles?” Buffy asked, cutting Willow off before she could finish. “I mean, we found the girl. Her blood had been drained for the ritual.”

“You’re probably right. We know it was involved. Buffy,” Giles said, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. “Did you happen to look around your house for something similar? A second talisman, perhaps?”

“For the second demon… no, but I’ll check right now.” Buffy was already halfway out the door.

She found it on the ground, next to the steps that led up to the back porch. This one was different, an oblong green crystal fastened to a bundle of sticks tied with rawhide strips. She was pretty sure it was a talisman though. She brought it back to the Magic Box to show the others. “You think both of these demons are part of the same plot?”

“Sure looks that way,” Xander replied. Tara had pulled out the book where they’d found the Acanthia demon and re-read the description. “Nothing here about a talisman,” she told them.

“Look up general talismans,” Giles instructed, sniffing the bundle. “In that book I gave you on summoning spells. I believe this is cypress.”

“I don’t get it,” said Willow. “That dragon was summoned in the woods near Xander’s apartment. That’s nowhere near your house, Buffy.”

“What are you saying, Will?” Buffy asked.

“If whoever is doing this was really after Dawn – or even you – wouldn’t it want the dragon closer to you guys?”

Buffy sighed and sank down into a chair at the research table. “Well, there go all my theories. This sucks.”

“It’s not like we had any really good ones anyway.” Xander plopped into the seat beside her. “I mean, what do we know? It attacked your house for some reason…”

“Which we now know was the talisman,” Anya filled in. “So, probably, whoever put the talisman there is the person trying to kill you… or Dawn. But then there’s the dragon, so probably you.”

“Thanks, Anya,” said Buffy, in a tired voice. “That’s real helpful.” She massaged her forehead with one hand. “Giles, who’s doing this, and why? What do they want from me?”

The Watcher bowed his head at her plaintive tone. He wished he could offer comfort to his charge, but this time, he had no answers to give. “I – I don’t know, Buffy,” he said, taking off his glasses and falling back on his habit of polishing away his discomfort from his lenses. “I’m afraid there just aren’t enough dots to connect to determine a motive.”

“So, basically,” Buffy said, “we’re nowhere close to figuring this out, are we?”

Giles donned his glasses and collected both talismans, an idea suddenly occurring to him. “I think we may need more help. I have an old friend, a wizard, who lives up near Yosemite. Perhaps he can be of assistance.”

Buffy looked at him with alarm. “You’re leaving?”

“I’ll be back in a few days,” he assured her. He shook his head and sighed. “I’m afraid this is beyond my knowledge. It’s not… looking things up in books. I wish I could just point you at something to slay, but I can’t. It’s – psychological, Buffy. It requires understanding those who do magic, and why someone would use it for such a thing as this. Why they would use it against you.”

“And you think this wizard guy can help with that?” Tara chimed in, intrigued by this new wrinkle in the magic elements of their mystery demon summoner.

“I certainly hope so,” Giles replied. “If anyone understands the ins and outs of wizards, it’s he.”

*****

When Buffy arrived at the Magic Box after work, Dawn was already there, doing her homework, while Anya tended shop and Xander and Willow did research. She was disappointed to hear that there was nothing new to report.

“When’s Giles getting back?” she whined. It hadn’t even been 24 hours, but Buffy was anxious.

“Just relax, Buffy. It won’t make him come any quicker,” said Xander.

“I’m going out patrolling again tonight.” Buffy stretched her arms in an effort to expend her fidgety energy. “Maybe that’ll help my nerves. Anybody want to stay with Dawn while I do?”

“Not us,” Xander replied. “Anya and I have a special night planned.”

“It’s all very romantic,” said Anya. “I’m even closing the shop early.” Buffy raised her eyebrows. It must be a momentous occasion if Anya Show-Me-the-Money Jenkins was closing early.

“What about you, Will?”

Willow studied her for a moment, wearing an expression Buffy couldn’t quite interpret, as though perhaps the witch were trying to puzzle out something that Buffy wasn’t aware she was hiding. Then, it passed, and Willow shook her head. “I’ve got a thing… the school’s fixed me up with a prospective student.”

“UC Sunnydale is now a dating service?” Buffy joked.

Willow smiled slightly. “They spend the night, and we show them around, give them an idea of what the school is like, you know. ‘Hang out with an actual living student’ kind of thing.”

“As opposed to the less popular ‘hang out with a dead student’ thing,” replied the Slayer.

Xander looked up. “You know, if it were any other town, that would be funny.”

“What’s Tara doing?” Buffy asked, now onto her last resort.

“She has to go to a lecture for class tonight. I’m sorry, Buffy,” said Willow. “I could try to change my plans…”

Buffy shook her head. “No, it’s okay. I’ll just…”

“What about Spike?” Dawn suggested.

“No,” she said quickly. “Dawn, you can stay by yourself. I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

The younger girl’s face lit up. “Really?”

“Just don’t leave the house, promise?”

“Buff,” Xander said warily, “you sure that’s a good idea?”

“I’ll make it a short patrol. Willow and Tara have protection spells on the house six ways to Sunday. Nothing’s getting in.” She turned back to Dawn. “Just keep the doors locked, don’t open the door for anyone, and for God’s sake, don’t give out any invitations.”

“Hey, uh, Buffy? Could I talk to you for a minute?”

Buffy turned her attention back to Willow, who was again wearing that inscrutable expression. “Sure,” she said, following the redheaded witch into the training room. “What’s up?”

“Buffy, what – what’s wrong with you?” She said it in a concerned voice, not accusatory at all, and it made Buffy want to break down all her barriers and tell Willow everything. “Is there… something going on? With Spike?”

Buffy ran her hands over her face and through her hair. She’d kept it all inside, ashamed of the situation she’d found herself in, yet unwilling, for Spike’s sake, to admit what he had done. In spite of everything, she didn’t want to give her friends another reason to hate him.

“He did some sort of spell,” she told Willow hesitantly. “I don’t know what it was supposed to do, but it didn’t work, and I just – ugh.” She shook her hands at her sides, as if she could shake off the essence of Spike like water.

Willow’s mouth opened in surprise. “It didn’t work?”

“No! At least, if I believe him.” Buffy shrugged, as if she weren’t sure whether to believe him or not. If she noticed the witch’s sudden investment in the tale, it didn’t show. She walked over to the pommel horse and leaned against it. “He said it was an anti-love spell, but I sure wasn’t feeling the ‘anti’! God! I was…” She trailed off, thinking of exactly what she’d been doing. “With Spike!”

“Oh, no…”

“What?” When she didn’t answer, Buffy said, “Will? You didn’t have something to do with this, did you?”

“I may have, um…”

Buffy pushed off the pommel horse, standing up straight, her eyes glittering with anger. “You gave him the spell, didn’t you? Willow, how could you?”

“I’m sorry, Buffy, I –”

“Don’t you ever stop meddling? These are people’s lives, Will! You can’t just…” She broke off, too upset to finish her thought.

Willow backed up a couple steps, a wounded expression on her face. “I’m sorry, Buffy. I’m so… It wasn’t supposed to go like that,” she said, her tone pleading. “It was just… You didn’t see him. He was so wrecked. He wanted to get over you.”

Buffy’s mouth twitched, her anger subsiding somewhat at the combination of Willow’s guilt and Spike’s pain. “He was… really?”

Willow nodded, taking a tentative step toward her friend. “You didn’t… did you, maybe, say something that would…”

“We had a fight,” she admitted with a sigh. “About Jacob. I accused him of being jealous – which he totally is – and he told me I shouldn’t try to be a normal girl.”

“And then…?”

“And then I told him he was full of shit and to stop psychoanalyzing me,” Buffy groaned, taking a seat on the bench on the side of the room.

“Huh.” Willow sank down next to her. “Buffy? Can I – can I ask you something?” When she nodded, Willow said, “If Spike was so full of it… I mean, it’s just…” She took a deep breath before blurting it out. “I talked to Jacob. He said…”

“I broke up with him. Yeah,” Buffy admitted.

“Why? Because of… Spike?”

Buffy bent over, leaning her elbows on her knees and burying her face in her hands. “I – I don’t know.”

“Do you, um… do you have feelings for him? For Spike, I mean.” Buffy’s head snapped up in alarm, and Willow hurried to add, “Because it – it’d be okay if you did.” Even as she tried to reassure her friend, Willow knew it wasn’t that simple. She’d always had a soft spot for the vampire, but the others wouldn’t be quite as forgiving.

“I don’t know.” Buffy squeezed her eyes shut, to keep the tears from falling. “I’m just so confused, Will.”

Willow wrapped her arms around her best friend, hugging her tightly. “It’s okay, Buffy.”

“I don’t even know why the hell I listened to Spike in the first place.”

The witch wrinkled her nose in thought. “Because he’s frighteningly perceptive? But also completely in love with you, so… maybe a little biased?”

“I just can’t… you don’t know what it feels like, Will. It’s like – have you ever really wanted something? Like, it was all you ever dreamed of, and then one day, you realized you were never, ever gonna get it?”

Willow nodded. “I used to want to be an astronaut – you know, until my mom explained to me about the rocket speed, and the flying, and – and the whole fire thing. Oh, and the small, claustrophobic spaces.” She paused, reining in the babbling. “But, uh, this isn’t about me. Go on,” she encouraged Buffy.

“That’s what it feels like,” Buffy said, “admitting Spike is right. I never wanted any of this – I didn’t ask to be the Slayer. I didn’t ask to be different. All I ever wanted was to be a normal girl, and now it feels like I’m giving that up. Like a huge dungeon door just slammed shut in my face, with me on one side and normal on the other.” She bowed her head again, choking back a sob. “It hurts, Will. It feels like… like I’m watching everything I ever wanted disappear, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.”

Willow reached out and rubbed gentle, soothing circles across the Slayer’s back, as her best friend mourned the loss of her dreams. “It’s okay, Buffy,” she said softly. “Normal’s not all it’s cracked up to be, you know?”

Buffy gave her a watery smile. “I still can’t help feeling like I made a terrible mistake. Like maybe I didn’t give Jacob enough of a chance.”

“Would that have made you happy?”

Buffy bit her lip. “I don’t know.”

“Because you should do whatever makes you happy, Buffy, no matter what anyone says – any of us, or Giles, or Spike, or anybody.”

“I don’t even think I know what that is.”

“You’ll figure it out.” She squeezed Buffy’s hand. “Hey, are you really sure you’re okay with Dawn being home alone? You’re not just being crazy irrational because of all the other stuff going on?”

Buffy shook her head, a slight smile creeping onto her face. “Not irrational. I just can’t – with Spike, you know? Everything’s too complicated. But I’m sure she’ll be fine with the wards up.” She stood, but hesitated before going back out to the storefront.

“Hey, Will?” she said, as the other girl followed her up off the bench. “You would’ve made a great astronaut.”

Willow grinned, wrapping an arm around Buffy and squeezing her into a lopsided hug as she pulled her towards the door.